Senior Golden Sneakers
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hilarious.
A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, "Mypenis," and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, "Error. Not long enough."
See you all tomorrow
Jeri[/quote]
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Good morning Becky . I got a big laugh out of those'd jokes.
marie
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Good morning - everyone is so busy but delightful to see the posts. I took my last Christmas gifts to church yesterday. Zipped home for a bite to eat and ordered a new phone for my dad (I'd been doing research to try to find one with a higher amplification level AND good reviews AND availability by Christmas), then off to the crochet class. I signed up for next week although they aren't certain there will be enough people to hold the class. Then I spent a lot of time speaking with nurses, my dad, then several friends I've not spoken with for quite a while.
The nursing home is now quarantined due to Influenza A. Residents in several wings (including where my dad lives) are restricted to their rooms (no communal meals) and apparently several residents are quite ill. They'd prefer people not visit unless necessary AND that they be healthy if they do come in. I said I'd call before coming to visit.
I did some crocheting after that to try to take advantage of having worked with the instructor yesterday afternoon. Yippee!
Need to run to the store for a couple of packages of mushrooms and a friend would like to get together for coffee and conversation tomorrow. I would imagine every coffee shop and mall will be full to overflowing.
Love the jokes and all the recipe sharing (glad you are feeling better Jeri) and NEW CAR (wahoo Gayla). Congrats to the Dallas Cowboys (YES Marie!!!!) Sandy, no babysitting this week? Barbie - any more dancing performances on the slate this month? Anne - I have heard of avoiding nightshades. I will stop complaining, I do not take any medication so some pain and stiffness isn't really that bad overall. It is annoying and I find avoiding sodium is my biggest ally. I use my hands a lot and I do try to walk 5 miles each day. My foot doctor says my feet are a mess---neuromas, hammer toes, bunions, and osteoarthritis etc. But still, I am fortunate I am still moving!! Phoebe so glad you are home and I hope you don't have toooo much to tend to before Christmas. Shirley, what a happy shopping weekend. Hugs to you and DH. Hi Jackie!! Hi Buzz!! Hi Diane!! Hi Phyllis!! Hi Karen!! Hi to everyone I may have missed---no intention to slight anyone.
Hugs.
Lin0 -
Okay, can't seem to post a picture today. Later.........
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Anyone ever heard of veggie pizza with tomato sauce? Strange.0
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sure Becky, I love veggie pizza. I like broccoli, onions peppers and mushrooms.
Just a quick post intened to be longer but time has slipped away. Hope the doctor knows what to do for my knee and does it quickly, it is slowing me down, and I hate that!!
Sad news this morning, a friend called to tell us that the company owner, founder, friend, and all around well respected man, has cancer in the liver and it has spread to his brain stem. The family has asked that there be no visitors except family and they will likely take him home. He is in the hospital now in what they call a 'state of delirium'. He hears, but won't open his eyes or speak. I think this is how my mil was before she passed. The hospice nurse said let her be, dont try to wake her. So I've been crying, can't help it, I've known him a long time. Jim is pretty close to him. We just have to carry on.
Got a few errands to get done before my dr. appt.
take care
so glad Gayla checked in.
Phoebe0 -
p.s. Jeri, that sounds good, I know you make homemade sweetened condensed milk, I tried to make it, but it wasn't right somehow.. please, can I try your recipe for that too??
lol, we need a full cookbook don't we?0 -
phoebe Prayers for your long time friend. hope the doctor can give you some relief on your knees.
Hugs
Marie0 -
Happy Monday!! I don't know what happened to the morning but here it is afternoon and I am still not showered. I have to get to the grocery store to buy ingredients for my appetizers. I decided on a cucumber on little rye bread topped with cream cheese and Italian dressing with a dash of paprika on top. Will make the same one for all three gatherings. I also want to get a manicure and make an appointment for a hair trim. I did wash clothes this morning and ordered a tee shirt with an AARP Membership for my daughter's 50th birthday on December 30th.
Sorry about your friend Phoebe, will keep him in my prayers.
Have a great day.
Sandy
One Day at a Time0 -
Wow! you go away for a weekend and there are tons of posts.
Loved the jokes, we sure can use them with all the holiday stresses.
BARBIE - I love your dog pictures, they are so cute.
ANNE - I too am from Ontario (Niagara Region) where are you from?
I just spent the weekend in Toronto with my oldest daughter who has lived there now for 9 years.
BECKY - Yes, Izzy is my grand cat right now, but my daughter Kathy is expecting in April and it will be our first grandchild.
She also has two cats. Yes I have heard of veggie pizza with tomato sauce. That is how we make our homemade pizzas. Tomato or spaghetti sauce.
Another busy day but will make time to check in . I am doing laundry now, need to work out, need to make homemade soup and the list goes on and on.
I had a great time with my two daughters. Our picture is on Facebook at the Christmas Market in Toronto. I had a German Schnitzel on a pretzel bun, mulled wine and an Apple Toddy while I was there. If you want to check it out the account is in David Bruce.
I did buy a German ornament for the tree which came from Germany and was made in Germany. The place was decorated really nice with all the lights and such. It was really cold and talk about shoulder to shoulder people. Anyway, after that I went to see Kristina's office for work and then we went into the Village to get some dinner. Kathy left us after the market, she is doing great, she is 25 weeks pregnant now and 25 pounds. The doctor said she is at the limit now in weight and she had to watch herself now.
After going to two different restaurants we couldn't get into we finally found one to have some dinner. We took the subway and streetcar back to Kristina's and then chilled for the night in our jammies and watched a movie ( Blue Jasmine).
Now to get back to my laundry and exercise, the day is flying by.
Shirley
Ontario, Canada
42F and getting warmer tomorrow to almost 50F.0 -
Becky Just start one and am sure we will be there. Or Sandy could get our old ones back if we just ask her to do so. I missed seeing you and Judy there, did you find out your Join in date. with the instruction I gave you.
Hugs to you
Marie
Hi Everyone: and Welcome Anne! Nice to have you with us.
I had a nice relaxing time at the resort. I could have stayed on a few more days. We had plenty of food with us to last a few more meals but my husband was anxious to get back home. We bought a huge villa outside of Cairo in a new area that is growing so fast. We just bought it last week and the owner has agreed to fix up a few things that were left hanging and so my husband wanted to stop by and see if any of the things had been fixed. Mostly the villa is finished on the outside but we will have to start from scratch and do the finishing inside. It is a 3 story villa. With a basement. Has a nice family room in the basement too. I am excited about that. The main floor has just the kitchen, dining and living area and a small bathroom. Next level has the bedrooms and the roof top can have a nice patio area if we ever decide we want to build it up there. We are excited to have finally decided to buy this property. We have been looking for about a year!! The villa is in a gated compound so it will be secure. So for the next year we will be busy fixing it up but the fun part is that we can do anything that we want to inside. I am dreaming up ways to design the kitchen right now. I am thinking of the open style instead of putting a door. When I get chance 'll take pictures of it so you can see it as we go along.
Heading to Abu Dhabi in a week to stay with my daughter. I can't wait for that!!! It will be so fun.
Oh the funny thing is while at the beach resort I had a dream that Barbie and a friend visited me and we were at a party. Barbie had a while plate of chocolate cup cakes!!! It was so unlike her and I woke up in the middle of the night in a startle thinking WHY DID BARBIE EAT ALL THSE CHOCOLATE CAKES?? I had made them so I think she was just trying to make me feel happy??? But it was so funny to me.in my dream. Anyway Barbie, I know that would never happen in real life but it would be fun to have you come and visit me.
WEll I guess I'll head to bed now. That way it brings me one day closer to traveling to see my grand daughter and daughter.
Love ya all Phyllis0 -
pjsatticPhoebeWaleskaGA wrote: »p.s. Jeri, that sounds good, I know you make homemade sweetened condensed milk, I tried to make it, but it wasn't right somehow.. please, can I try your recipe for that too??
lol, we need a full cookbook don't we?
This is the recipe I used this year and I did use the brown sugar. You can add 1/2 tsp vanilla if you want instead of the brown sugar. I found it didn't quite make the full volume that would be in a can, but I used it anyway n
Dairy-Free Sweetened Condensed Milk Recipe
Prep Time: 5 minutes
Cook Time: 1 hour
Feel free to adjust the amount of sugar or sweetener to your taste. The recipe works best with anywhere from 1/3 to 1/2 cup of your sweetener of choice.
Ingredients
1 can of unsweetened coconut milk. ( do not use the lite version )
1/3 cup- 1/2 cup granulated sugar, honey or light agave syrup
1 tablespoon brown sugar (optional but adds good flavor)
Instructions
Place the coconut milk, sweetener of choice, and brown sugar (if using) into a saucepan and whisk gently over medium heat for 2-3 minutes. This will help the solid bits of coconut milk melt and incorporate with the sugar.
When the mixture is just beginning to bubble around the edges, reduce the heat to the lowest flame/setting.
Set a timer for one hour (you may need to go a bit longer depending on your stove) and simmer uncovered, whisking every 5-10 minutes to release steam and aid in evaporation.
The mixture will reduce by about half and should be quite thick. You will also notice that it is a darker color. Remove from heat, stir thoroughly and pour into a glass jar or container. Cool in the refrigerator. It will continue to thicken as it cools.
Use as needed in recipes or to stir into coffee or tea.
Jeri0 -
Phoebe - I am so so sorry about the bad health news. Hugs.
While looking for something post here today I wanted to wish all the best to everyone.....
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I rediscovered a poem I loved in an old child's book of mine, and I'd like to share it with you all. Author unknown.
OUT IN THE FIELDS
The little cares that fretted me,
I lost them yesterday,
Among the fields above the sea,
Among the winds at play,
Among the lowing of the herds,
The rustling of the trees,
Among the singing of the birds,
The humming of the bees,
The foolish fears of what might pass
I cast them all away,
Among the clover-scented grass,
Among the new-mown hay,
Among the hushing of the corn
Where drowsy poppies nod,
Where ill thoughts die and good are born-
Out in the fields with God.
Anne
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Thanks for sharing that Anne. It's lovely and I don't believe I've ever read it.
I am having so many computer problems with MFP that I think I'll just read posts for a while here and on other threads and just stop posting. I am doing nothing but making myself very unhappy with all my mistakes.
Lin0 -
That's lovely Anne, thank you for posting.
Jeri, thank you for the recipe, ill print it. It sounds delicious.
Phyllis, had to smile at the thought of Barbie eating all those cupcakes!
Your new place sounds so great! Congratulations
Shirley, this is an annual trip for you, isnt it? Glad you had such a good time with your girls.
Sandy, so it will be cucumber sandwiches, i think? Good idea.
Lin, cute graphic, i didn't realize that you walk 5 miles per day. How do you do it?
I m thinking of you all, hope you are relaxing tonight.
i have a torn something in my knee, starts with a 'm'. I have an appointment with a orthapedic dr this Friday. This dr today drained fluid and gave me a steroid injection. It hurt. Still hurts but better, so I'm grateful!
I meant to say our friend is our company president. It's always sad, isn't it?
Tomorrow is the company Christmas party, so I should get to sleep. Errands to run as well, talk to you tomorrow night.
Phoebe
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*SENIOR DRIVING*
*As a senior citizen was driving down the motorway, his car phone rang..
Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, " Vernon , I
just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on M25.
Please be careful!"*
*"Hell," said Vernon , "It's not just one car.. It's hundreds of them!"*
Hmmmm
Jeri
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linder4866 wrote: »Thanks for sharing that Anne. It's lovely and I don't believe I've ever read it.
I am having so many computer problems with MFP that I think I'll just read posts for a while here and on other threads and just stop posting. I am doing nothing but making myself very unhappy with all my mistakes
Lin
Please don't stop posting Lin, we would miss you too much. I feel bad if I hurt your feelings.
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linder4866 wrote: »
I am having so many computer problems with MFP that I think I'll just read posts for a while here and on other threads and just stop posting. I am doing nothing but making myself very unhappy with all my mistakes.
Lin
Lin you are an intergal part of our group. You post great posts and that show how caring and wonderful you are. Heavens Buzz and I are the Queens of the lost post. I just laugh at myself when I screw up. And I do it lots. LOL
Big hugs to you.
Jeri0 -
Phoebe and Lin - I'm so glad you liked the poem, I found it did wonders for me in the midst of this really bad cold and still so much to do. Last evening, the mincepies just had to be made, so I tied my hair back and I wore a head square around my face so I wouldn't cough or sneeze into them. Had to laugh at myself, can you imagine if I'd had a "home invasion" the little thugs, whoops "dears" would have galloped off screaming,!!!
Jeri - loved your joke on senior driving. I don't drive, I hoof it everywhere. Alas, one of my long time dear friends was quite capable of doing just that. He though, was mainly going through red lights. Pretty hairy if one happened to be with him I can tell you! Finally his children "lost" his keys and now he is in a care home like Lins dad.
Which brings me back to the poem. "The little things that troubled me, I lost them yesterday." Wish I could lose this cold as well!0
