Runners that need some nutritional accountability
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oh @shanaber that sounds absolutely awful. I am right there with you on hoping everything resolves so you can have the surgery on Friday and get that dang thing out of you!
Many many many hugs from the toasty state of tx to you and your family right now. Waiting must be impossibly awful. 🥺😢😕
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Good morning, everybody!
I am still banned from my fitness pal at work lol
@swenson19d. How did you find Loki? That is quite a pack you have got going. Growing up we had nine dogs due to unplanned litters. Unfortunately, it was really hard as they developed littermate syndrome and there was just constant fighting. A lot of the reasons why I don’t want a dog again.
@shanaber I hope those antibiotics work! It’ll be so nice to get that surgery done and keep that ball rolling.
We are doing OK here. Not much is really new. Black cat is hanging in there without a gray cat, it is still so weird not having him in the house. Black cat has developed some separation anxiety so we started his antidepressant/appetite stimulation pills so hopefully he feels better.
No movement on the property or the house. Still just waiting for people to do their jobs.
No movement on getting healthier or losing weight either. I did pretty good last week and then just fell off the wagon over the four-day weekend. We didn’t eat a lot, but we definitely ate what we wanted. DH is under the impression that I “just need to start running “and I will lose my weight.🙄
We still have that 10k at the end of next month that he signed us up for, I reminded him yesterday, and he got a slightly panic look lol
Work is pretty boring, I have just been handling appointments. I did get a call from our commander last week saying that I was being offered a tenure waiver to stay in one year longer. It’s something that I’ve pursued for the last two years, but was told that the Air Force was not giving them, but then suddenly they give them 100 days before I separate. We talked about it, but we feel that it was too little too late and I’m already well on the way to being retired.
Next week, I have a small gynecological surgery, I honestly don’t know why they need anesthesia, maybe it’s a civilian world thing and they actually spend money on you lol but I reckon that’s about it for here.
Have a great week!
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I've missed being on here for a week or so....just really super busy last week. Seems I've missed a lot.
@shanaber I love all the pictures from your trip. I sounds like you had a wonderful time. Love the 'barkchutery' treat board for Hobbes. I'm glad to hear your surgery is soon. I'll be sure to say a prayer for you and the surgeons on Friday! Please let us know how it goes when you feel like it. How long are you expecting to be in the hospital? I'm sorry to see that you had a rough weekend. I hope the antibiotics are doing their job and your numbers will be back to what they need to be in the morning.
@swenson19d You sure have a lot going on! Hugs to you.
@CMorning99 Once you have the mindset of retiring, I would find it hard to reset for another year too. Sounds like things are progressing, even though really slowly. I'm a patient person, but I think CA bureaucracy would the end of my patience. LOL0 -
Hi All - just wanted to let you know the surgery was long (9.5 hours) but went well and she got clear margins all the way around. Tumor was bigger than they thought but is gone. Lost a good portion of my pancreas, the gall bladder and unexpectedly part of the stomach that was too close to the tumor. The good news is I got released from the hospital yesterday, several days early. It pays to be in pretty good shape if you have to have something major like this. It is so good to be home and I slept great. Now I am learning what I can eat. For sure not much at any one time and still soft and bland foods (dang I really wanted tacos from our favorite taco place!). Also no fresh vegetables which is so hard for me - no salads, no carrots and celery with hummus. My weight is way down, around 130, which on one hand is great but whoa I would not recommend it. I am hoping as I am able to eat more I can bring it up some.
Hope you are all doing great. As I am feeling stronger I will go back and comment on how you all are doing!5 -
Honestly @shanaber my heart stopped at the words "clear margins" and I had to get up and do a happy dance all around the house before I could read the rest of your post!! 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁
SOunds like the BEST possible outcome but WOW what an intense surgery. Hang in there and take care of yourself. Lots of healing to do.1 -
Thank you so much for updating us @shanaber! I've been thinking a lot about you. I, too, was ecstatic to see that they got clear margins! That was a really long surgery. Getting to come home early is great!! There's nothing like sleeping in your own bed. I agree that it helps immensely to be in good shape when something major happens. I know my heart surgery would not have gone so well if I hadn't been training for the HM. I hope you can start eating more normally soon. Hang in there..... Again, I am so happy for the good news! It made my day!1
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@shanaber So good to hear! Did you get that taco yet? Is Hobbes keeping you company? Why no veggies, is it a risk to bacteria or roughage avoidance to let things heal? Nice that you were able to leave early. I always felt bad for eric having to wait on me and being kinda helpless. The psych consult was simply to manage depression. I told my PCP that i have major depressive disorder (MDD). I met with a councellor and really like her so far. Ive decided that dh is a narcissist and am trying to manage that poo show.
rest up!1 -
@CMorning99 - I hope you are recovering from your surgery and feeling better. I can't imagine deciding to stay longer when you are that close and already into the retiring mindset. When I retired they asked me to stay too but it was more about what they owed me in vacation and other time off and how they were going to pay me. We settled it by them keeping me technically as an employee but 'on vacation'. It was good for me in the long run as I didn't have to pay for COBRA insurance for the 3 months and I suspect it didn't hit someone's budget as an expensive payout.
@SummerSkier and @quilteryoyo - thanks for the happy dances! I envision Snoopy 😂
Hi @swenson19d! I am supposed to be on a bland soft diet - veggies aren't on that list. Mostly because they are more difficult to digest and I need to give my stomach some time to recover first. Hoping when I see the doctor next week she will green light them.
I am so glad the therapist is helping to manage the MDD along with your DH! How is Kevin doing? Staying away from the snakes I hope!
I am finally feeling somewhat normal. Pain is down, still just taking Tylenol but cut it in half other than at bedtime. So far so good. I have been trying bits of other foods too. Got bored with the soft, bland diet. Not that I went crazy but had a piece of cranberry walnut toast one morning and some chicken and veggie kabobs from our favorite Mediterranean restaurant. No tacos yet... I am craving them and so many other things I probably shouldn't eat yet. DH says it is worse than when I was pregnant. I also decided yesterday that I need to get back to myself. I know that sounds weird but it seems to be too easy for me to slip into this sad frightened place and just do nothing. That isn't me and I need to stop it. So today after getting lab work done DH and I ran errands and grocery shopped. Later I will get out for a walk, hopefully with Hobbes and DH in tow.
Our concert series at the Hollywood Bowl starts this Friday and since I can't go I told DH he had to and made all the arrangements for him to go with our friends. John Williams is conducting and it should be an amazing concert. I am thinking they might play some of the music from the latest Indiana Jones movie. It may also be one of his last appearances at the Bowl - I hope not but he is in his 90s now.
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So glad to hear from you @shanaber! Thanks for checking in. I hope the doctor allows you to start adding in the foods you are craving. It seems if we are told we can't have something, human nature is that we start craving that thing. I can imagine that is easy to slip into a dark place. Glad you are recognizing it and taking steps to not go there. I pray you continue to heal quickly and can get back to your "normal" self soon!1
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Kevin recovered from the copperhead bite within 36 hours. I kept the benadryl in his system for the first 24 (75mg/8h). I hate to say the bite was "good" for him, but there were benefits. He had a steriod shot which improved his join pain significantly. He romped like a pup again. We also had the opportunity to work on snake aversion. He knew what bit him him by the smell. I showed him the snake and told him "snake bite" and bit him with my fingers close to his face where he got bit. It took twice before he backed up and decided that snake was a bad smellin' dude. Kev has has an appointment the 11th for surgery consult.
@shanaber glad things are improving! It is hard staying engaged when you are limited physically. And so easy to slip into a funk, mourning that loss of ability.
@CMorning99 "small surgery" in the sensitive area... ya, take the anesthetisa. (how did it go btw?). You remind me of a story I heard about a German doctor new to the US and the notion that we (American's) are babies, LOL! The story was about tubes in ears...probably over so quickly that there is no use for numbing. Alex's girlfriend (not the crazy B that was with him at the time) had Loki and posted on FB that she needed to rehome him due to her health and she wasnt able to meet his needs like she wanted. No brainer to take him. But, yes, it is a full house. Dh fenced the back yard so they have about 2 acres to run. The cats are happy to have the safe space in the front.
We are missing Cori more than a week now. We have a dumb A. neighbour who "raises" feral cats... just coyote/fox food. A litter of 7-ish week old kittens went missing the same day Cori did. Seems I found one, the black kitten that bit the heck outta me and i took to the pound. Something dropped it... wonder if dogs barked at it and it high tailed it sans kitten. I'm really mad that they let these cats reproduce. Prob why I lost Goober, Mallory and Cori. f-ers.
11 days til NCLEX exam.
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@swenson19d Somehow I missed that Kevin got bit by a copperhead! I'm glad he is okay. Sorry that Cori is missing. We had a neighbor that kept feeding the feral cats. I get that they think they are doing them a favor, but all that does is allow them to reproduce more effectively.
Good luck on your exam. 0 -
@swenson19d - I am so sorry about Cori! I hope maybe he is just out exploring and will eventually find his way back home but it sounds like that won't be likely. People here trap the feral cats and have them neutered and released. That is great for limiting the overall population but still provides food for the coyotes and foxes which should be going after all the rodents instead.
What is Kevin having a surgical consult for?
I am sure you are studying hard this weekend for you exam but please take some time to relax and de-stress too!
@CMorning99 - I hope you are doing ok!
I saw the surgeon this week and she was so happy with my recovery. I got the staples out and it feels so much better! She told me to start my walks with just 30 minutes and increase as it felt doable, I am still just doing about 30 minutes. Today was a little longer but it just feels good to get outside and move. I have to be sure to get out early enough though or Hobbes overheats, even with it only at 80, he just isn't used to it.
Also saw the oncologist the same day as the surgeon (he had a cancellation). I am a bit frustrated with him because I don't feel that he read my file, the results, or even remembered our previous visit (which he had documented with notes). Basically told me because I was over 65 I was not a candidate for the more aggressive chemo which we had talked about before as the most affective. DH and I walked away feeling a bit stunned and taken aback by his change in attitude. So I sent him a message and also started the process to get a 2nd opinion. He called in response to my message and said ok we can go with the more aggressive chemo but he didn't think I was recovering well enough from the surgery?!?! I actually said 'Seriously??? It has only been 2.5 weeks and the surgeon was extremely pleased with my recovery so far! We'll see how it goes but I really don't think I want someone on my team who doesn't seem to be invested in helping me to the best outcome or discussing it in more detail if there are concerns.
I am also eating better and more but my weight is down again. I've got to find a way to stop that descent!
ETA - Also I finally got my tacos last night! SO SO Good! and I had a small salad the other day. Surprising the things you miss!2 -
@shanaber Yeah for the surgeon's report and getting out to walk already. You are doing great. I'm also glad you are getting a second opinion from another oncologist. This one doesn't sound like the right one for you, for various reasons. Hang in there and I hope you find an oncologist that makes you feel like they have your best interest in mind and will listen and discussing all the options and why one is better than the other given your circumstances.0
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Hi Folks!
Sorry I was MIA - I really hate getting on the computer after work LOL. But I am working half days now so I figured I would get back into it.
@shanaber So glad you are doing so well! Aren't Doctors the pits sometimes ugh. Don't settle!
So what has it been, like a month? Oof.
My surgery went well - I had a polyp removed and a cervical cutterage. I asked since I was going to be under anyway, if he would replace my Paragard copper IUD since when they put it in the first time I thought I was going to pass out. Talking to some friends they said to take the anesthesia and it just makes things so much easier on everyone. The Friday before my surgery I had a colposcopy (they don't bother me) but he hit a vein in my cervix and it was rather humorous thinking back as I was just laying there and him holding pressure for 25 min...we were both over it by the end of that appt LOL. But all results came back as expected with only mild cell dysplasia.
Work is boring, I mean at this point I have 7 "working" days left so I just go in for a couple hours to do out processing stuff and then have lunch with DH and go home and work on reselling.
I have my VA appt tomorrow with the Doctor to go over all my aches and pains for my disability rating - I can't even fathom what it is going to be and I had to stop reading the VA message boards b/c they were just wacky people.
House stuff is moving. I ended up having to "buy" the developmental credit for $25K - it was comical because when I went to drop off the cashiers check, the ladies at conservancy office had no idea what I was talking about. I guess it had just been a convo between the conservancy director and the county lawyer. Even my Project Manager was rolling his eyes. We finally got the civil engineering reports back for the driveway and we are waiting on final approval to start that project. I swear this project is like a hydra - cut one head and 2 grow back. I had to get an attorney to do all the easement/driveway maintenance agreements that would be attached to the deed of the split. Hopefully submit house plans to county in the next 60 days.
I got another job offer but turned it down. I am really torn. I have a good friend who recently retired and got a good contracting job and is able to put his full retirement and VA money to his mortgage - they expect to pay off their house in 10 years. It is so tempting. I am still not sure how money will shake out when I retire, we will have enough for sure but the house is such a money pit that it makes me nervous. DH says to stay the course but I feel like I should be making the money.
I started tracking calories for a bit and then lost interest again. My Gynecologist put in my records "overweight but does not impact health"... well humph. We have our 10K this weekend, is going to be warm and I have not walked over 2 miles yet LOL. It is going to be...fun... We also have a friend coming down to visit us for a week to escape the heat up north so I figure there is no point in trying to start tracking now.
I have given myself a start date of 1 Aug - my first day of using up some of my vacation before I retire. I am taking 31 days of vacay and selling back 59 days...yeah I am a work-a-holic. Start tracking calories again and going for a walk/jog every morning...I won't have any reason not to LOL...I am sure I will find something though.
I guess that is about all the updates for now. I will check in again soon to see how folks are doing! Stay hydrated!
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Glad to hear from you @CMorning99 . I'm glad your surgery went well. Just 7 more work days! Where has the time gone! I'm sure you will figure out the best course for you after you retire. One thing to remember is that you have your retirement money, so you don't HAVE to keep a job you get if it turns out you don't like it. Give it a chance, but move on if that is not what you want to do. Retirement is great that way. You're house woes give me a headache and I just have to read about them. I can't even imagine. Good luck with everything and please stay in touch. Enjoy your friend's visit.1
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@CMorning99 - Glad to hear your surgery went well but that is kind of funny about the vein! I also can't believe you only have a few days left!! The only think I would suggest is enjoy a day or two of doing nothing then set a schedule. Otherwise it is SO easy to just put things off. I really had to push myself to keep getting out to run and working out which honestly slipped way more than I like to admit. Some of it though was just not wanting to do strength workouts alone.
I agree with @quilteryoyo on getting a job. If you really want to then do it and you have lost nothing if you decide to quit. Also though you have a job already with your resale business so maybe just focusing on it?
I hope things keep moving forward on the house. It will be good to get the house plans submitted I bet. How long will it take the County to get an approval do you think?
Had my 2nd opinion visit today and OMG what a difference! This doctor basically asked me to start at the beginning and describe how the cancer was found and all the steps that brought me to him. He then talked about different types of cancers and suggested that they be categorized by spread, danger and personality, He called pancreatic cancer a mean sneaky cancer (personality) because it spreads before you know it, is dangerous because it recurs frequently and doesn't respond as well to chemo therapy making it necessary to use more aggressive treatment. However mine was found early enough that it is likely curable (his word) with the more aggressive treatment. We talked about treatment plans and options, etc.. I asked to start chemo in early Aug when I am 6 weeks post surgery and he thought that was reasonable rather than starting next week when the port is put in. So I have a new oncologist that I really like and have confidence in! WHooHoo!
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That is wonderful news about the new oncologist @shanaber ! It sounds like they really listened to you and have your best interest in mind. AND I LOVE that he said it is "curable." I had my fingers crossed it would be since you found it so early. Thanks for keeping us posted.0
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Just a quick update here… my port site is mostly healed I think. Technically they said I can’t shower or remove the bandage until Friday but also said 7 days and tomorrow would be 7 days. Hmmm I think what I may do is take the bandage off tomorrow but wait to shower until Friday morning.
Our DD flies in Friday morning and we are going to the Hollywood Bowl Friday night. I am so excited to get out a bit. I think we are also going out to dinner on Saturday and to the dog beach on Sunday if it isn’t too busy. The surf championships are going on so parking and crowds could be an issue even though they won’t actually be on the dog beach but just up on the other side of the pier.
Monday is chemo day. I have no idea what to expect but have my iPad ready with shows to watch and music to listen to. 6 hours to sit there seems like a long time! I don’t know when the side effects might kick in either. Will be interesting!
@CMorning99 - how are things going for you. Retirement must be soon!
@swenson19d - how are you doing? I know your test went really well. What happened with Kevin’s surgery consult?2 -
Monday is the beginning of the end of treatment. After treatment is the beginning of a wonderful rest of your life.
You do what you need to, I'll be here anxious to have you walking the dogs and figuring how to best approach your return to running glory. All thr best.3 -
Thanks @chris_in_cal!! Not looking forward to chemo other than having it kill whatever may be left of the cancer. I am definitely looking forward to getting it over with and on with my life, including getting back to running!1
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I'm glad your port surgery is healing well @shanaber and that you will finally be able to take a shower, today, I hope. I've never had to take chemo, thankfully, but have heard you will probably be okay for a couple of days, have a horrible day, and then more good days. I'm not saying this to be a downer, but so you will be prepared and know it is normal. Maybe ask when you go in and see what they say is normal. I don't know if all chemo is the same, but have heard a lot of people like to take ginger cookies to snack on or ginger ale to drink. It seems to set well on the stomach. Do you know how many treatments you are going to have? I hope not many, they do the job, and you are back to walking and running soon! Prayers.1
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Thanks @quilteryoyo - we had a phone call from one of the chemo nurses who went over everything with us. The drugs effect everyone differently and can even cause side affects while you are having the infusion. She said typical is for it to hit in the next 24-48 hours and then get progressively better. I have sessions every 2 weeks for 6 months assuming I can tolerate it for that long. They also do blood work every 2 weeks and CT scans regularly. The cancer center provides snacks and drinks like ginger ale. I did buy some old fashioned ginger snaps like I had as a kid. I like them anyway and have already been snacking on them 😊1
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I'm glad you got that feedback @shanaber . I hope you tolerate it well and it kills those nasty cells. Thanks for keeping us/me updated.1
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I hope things went as well as possible yesterday @shanaber !2
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Thanks @quilteryoyo! It went pretty well without a lot of side affects. I was pretty stressed out before we even left the house as evidenced by my very high BP and a bit of maybe a panic attack in the waiting room. They didn't get me in until a bit after 10 (my appointment was at 9) and the chemo infusion didn't even start for an another hour+. It was a long day! I left the center a bit after 4pm. The only side affect so far has been a general feeling of jitteriness(?). It really feels strange allmost like my heart is racing but it isn't, but my hands are shaky. So weird!
I hope you and all of your family are safe from all the storms!!3 -
@shanaber That sounds like how I feel when I use my albuterol nebulizer. Jittery. I'm glad that you got along okay. It is reasonable that you were nervous and a bit panicked. I think everyone would be. I hope you get along well the rest of the week. We are safe from the storms. Lots of water, but no damage to anything.1
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Helllllooooo......
This thread has gone silent!
@CMorning99 - you out there and still doing ok? I think you must be retired now. Did you decide on doing some contracting or just relaxing for a bit? How are you doing now with exercise and food?
@swenson19d - How are the pups and kitties all doing? How are you doing with all the pain? I hope better! What are your next steps for school? Has it started already?
I miss hearing from you both!0 -
I miss them too @shanaber . I hope they are doing well. I am so glad that you are posting and doing so well. It makes me very happy.1
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Good morning everyone!
I told myself I NEEDED to see what everyone was up to!
@Shanaber Thank you for all the updates - chemo is such the pits and so ick. How are you doing now?
All is well here. Yes I am officially retired now - not on paid vacation. I have been adjusting, I think. August flew by! I really thought that it would drag as I really had nothing planned but holy heck...a blink and it was gone! DH had to take 2 weeks of vacation in August as well because he was over his allowed time (he had been saving it up for the trial which still has not happened) so it was great, we just hung out and enjoyed spending time with each other. I started off my paid vacation with a schedule and cracked the whip...but alas it only lasted 10 days before I was so dang tired.
Property: Oh the drama. So my neighbor told me about Senate Bill 9 that was signed in Jan that was a state law to try and increase available housing in the State. It pretty much voided all the county's red tape INCLUDING the developmental credit I paid $25K for. My project manager (who seriously needs a mega bonus) reached out to the county and asked what was up...the county played dumb but acknowledged I did qualify for the permit. So we started all the permits again and I had to sign an affidavit that I was "developing" the property for residential use only (no short term rentals). Under the new law my neighbor who had previously not been able to divide b/c he is .01 acres short of 10, would be able to divide. Fast forward 30 days the County "announced" they had redrawn some maps (IDK what ones) and they didn't know if I qualified. Long story short, somehow I allegedly still qualify and my neighbor does not. Sounds like the County tried to do some quick damage control once they realized the cat was out of the bag. Seriously? This should be a straight forward admin process..but somehow I feel it is personal. So hopefully I get the credit money back AND allegedly the State capped the permit fees at $3K - so I should hopefully get about $10K back on fees I have already paid. We still don't have the grading report back, I think that some of the requirements were removed with SB9 so I "think" that is what we are waiting on. I did get the easement legal paperwork done though. Project manager is hoping we will be done before the end of the year.
Retirement: Still trying my hand a reselling. Although if I had to be honest with myself, I am putting a lot more effort into it, but probably not enough. Sales are steady which means they are growing b/c there are been a lot of glitches in the platforms and so many others took big cuts in profits. I am waiting on the VA determination for my benefits - they have 30-60 days after separation (1 Sep) to do it. A lot of my friends got theirs within a week or two but I also filed at the end of my window and the VA sent me 300 miles round trip for an 8 min pulmonary function test a week before my separation date so I am not expecting my rating as fast.
Black cat is doing well. We have been able to push his chemo out to every 5 weeks and he is doing well. His weight seems to have leveled off and he has officially gained back about 1lb. He has developed a bit of a cough but the vet ran every test under the sun and pretty much came up with he is a 16 y/o cat with cancer...he is not gonna be a kitten all the time. Well damn. The neighborhood cat the previous owners used to feed (He belonged to an old man who died awhile back and so allegedly the "neighborhood" adopted him...I don't know how long ago though) has been coming to our door meowing like he is hungry. I wonder if the other old man who was feeding him is not for some reason? I "think" someone takes/took care of him b/c a couple months ago I noticed it looked like his back legs had been shaved for treatment of a skin issue. DH and I tried to resist and send him home but he persisted and the previous owners had left a big jar of cat food for him so we put it out and was very hungry. DH and I are still grieving grey cat and the thought of another cat is not appealing, not to mention he is very much an outdoor cat and a bit skittish.
My weight has leveled off and I have not gained anything for 2 months - right at 185lbs so that is officially a 30lb gain in the last 3 years. I start to track but lose it by mid day - such a hassle...and when did MFP make barcode scanning a paid feature? WTF! When I first started my paid vacay I walked every morning for 30 min everyday. I need to start doing that but for some reason I am still.so.damn.tired! Not sleepy, if I lay down I don't sleep. IDK what is going on with me, I have never felt so "weak" and "tired". I have always prided myself in my mental fortitude and willpower and it seems gone. I actually had an anxiety attack in the middle of the night the other day - it was about PD (Psycho doc neighbor). It seems my carefully crafted mental compartments are cracking. I guess I took more damaged that I admit to myself in my career and combat deployments and obviously my mom. I was watching some YouTube video and it was talking about how people (specifically military) learn to disassociate or dehumanize events...well I seem to have excelled at that. I think back at how I handled my mom's death and it was eerily too calm and sterile...I had disassociated. And perhaps this is all coming back to bite me as in a book called "the body keeps score"...I don't want to handle it, I don't want to admit it...I just want to feel like I used to.
Well that was a bit of a downer LOL. But in all honestly I have so much to be grateful for and while the future is fuzzy - everything is going well and will go well! Well time to get my shipping done...yeah $$$$!
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Thanks for checking in @CMorning99 ! I don't think I knew that Grey cat passed away. I'm sorry to hear that. Glad that black cat is stable. Feeding the stray cat will "make" it yours. They know where they can get food. But it is so hard not to when you know they are hungry, I get it. Sounds like the house stuff is going some better. I hope you at least get started on the build soon. I would be upset if I were your neighbor that didn't qualify by only .01 acre. Can you give him that much somehow? You always think that you'll be bored when you retire, but somehow the time gets used up and you wonder where it went. It's so weird. I hope they get your VA benefits figured out soon. Can you get paid for mileage, since they sent you so far away for the pulmonary test? I know I have probably mentioned this before, but journaling may help you sort out some of your feelings about everything. Major changes in life circumstances (i.e. retirement, moving, building a house) are stressful and can make you tired. All of that uses up so much of your body's energy without you realizing it. Take care of yourself. I hope things go well with the reselling and the house. Keep us informed, please.0
