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  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    Hey everyone!

    This isn't my first time on MFP and it certainly isn't my first time attempting to lose weight and get healthy. However, this is the first time that I have started a weight loss journey that wasn't built on some extreme and unrealistic idea or expectation.

    My struggle with my weight began in high school, but I've always been a curvy person. Looking back, I wish I would have appreciated the curves I had then because I really want them now! In high school I was about 30 pounds overweight, now I'm 37 years old and weigh in at 247 pounds. My ideal weight is 140 pounds - so I've got 107 pounds to lose.

    My problem is I like to eat what I want when I want without portion control. For example, I generally eat an entire bag of Oreos in two days, all by myself. I've been known to eat an entire bag of chocolate chip cookies in one day, which resulted in me getting very sick. The problem is I taste something and it tastes good so I want more and more and more. Since I want more, I eat more and here we are. In the course of 18ish years, I've gained 70 pounds.

    My plan is to lose those 107 pounds by my fortieth birthday, which gives me 2 years and a little over 5 months to do so. That's about a pound a week. A good, steady weight loss that will leave me time to adapt and make gradual changes. Before I used to focus so much on cutting out sugar completely, or not eating certain things that I would end up crashing. What I need to do is learn how eat a serving and stop there. To treat myself on occasion, not every time I go to the store.

    I'm confident that I can do this. I've got all the head knowledge to make it work and now I'm going to do it. I know this is going to be a long and difficult journey, but it's going to be my journey and that makes it a great one!

    I'm looking forward to the day I can run after my son and not get winded. When I don't pass on going hiking and being outside because I'm lethargic and lazy. When my body doesn't hurt after I wake up in the morning and I have to limp to get moving. Those days are coming, and I am so excited for them!

    Hi @Grace4Peace,

    I would challenge the statement that you have all the head knowledge to do it. Weight loss is an education not just on the mechanics which I am sure you know but also on yourself and how to manage yourself during the process. It is largely a trial and error process. That is a nice way of putting it. It can be more like a "screw up pretty badly and then try to learn something from it" process. I like to say that as long as their is weight left to lose I will come across something else to learn. The same will probably be true once I get to maintenance.

    I encourage you to experiment and find your easiest path. There are plenty of struggles ahead but you do not want to inadvertently put some in your own way. My easiest path is high protein, high fiber and high volume of lower calorie food. That will not just work for just anyone but it works for me.

    I have thoroughly changed my fate and my life through this process. I am so grateful to what I have been given back that I wanted to start this group to help others achieve the same. You can do it!
  • tuddy315
    tuddy315 Posts: 11,356 Member
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    I'm 5'2. I have set activity level at sedentary since most of my working day is sitting at my desk or driving. 5 hours of my day is driving. I can't remember if I set it for 1/2 lb or 1 lb per week. It set my calorie goal at 1540 per day which most of the time is hard for me to achieve. I have a Professionaldigital Mini Scale.

    I weigh everyday and keep a log of that. I've been averaging -.4 to +.2 every week. When possible, I scan labels. However, my roommate does most of the cooking and most of the time I'm guessing on ingredients and quantities since he won't divulge his secret recipes.

    Thanks for any advise and help.
  • bmeadows380
    bmeadows380 Posts: 2,981 Member
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    When someone else is doing the cooking, its tough. If he's willing to support you on losing the excess weight but won't give you the recipe ingredients, you could see if he would open an MFP account just to build the recipes into the builder and then give you the values that you could then enter in as your foods. Otherwise, you might just need to eat separately and fix your own foods so you know what's in it.

    1540 is close to 1 lb/wk loss rate, maybe a little under. That is a good, sensible loss rate but the down side is that your deficit is around 400-500 calories a day, which means you don't have a lot of room for what I call "slop" - you don't have a lot of leeway, so if you are guessing that the serving size of the meal is 500 calories, but its' actually 650, you've now reduced your deficit to 250. When you start to get to the point where you need to stick with a slower loss rate, you really have to be meticulous to get as accurate a calorie count as you can.

    Also, 0.5 - 1 lb/wk is easily masked by body weight fluctuations, so you may be losing fat just fine, but retaining water for some reason or another which is making it look like you've gained when you really haven't. You really have to be patient and look at the long term trends to evaluate your progress. There's a really good link on body weight fluctuations in the thread under our announcements page called "Don't Let the Bathroom Scale Get the Better of You" - I'd highly recommend reading that as it explains some of this.

    In the article, it recommends taking an anchor week and comparing month to month values, so you might need to do the same and see where you are every 4 to 6 weeks. If you are losing at roughly 1 lb/wk, then in 6 weeks, you should be down by 5 lbs. If you aren't losing weight across a 6 week period, then you might need to adjust somewhere or take a look at your diary and see where you can tighten the counts up.

    Also pay attention to which entries you are using as there MFP database has a lot of out-dated or just plain wrong food entries. Compare to the labels of the product or go to the USDA food database for meats, fruits, and vegetables to find the correct entries (though you might want to only check legacy to make it easier to find the entries you want).
  • destiny_sierra
    destiny_sierra Posts: 66 Member
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    Hello,
    My name is Rochelle, I am 33 and 5'4 currently weighing 245. I am not new to MFP but this time around I am determined to make the change permanent. My journey with weight loss started Jan of 2014 at 279lbs, I lost an initial 40lbs quickly but then went up and down every few months. The lowest weight I have seen since I started was 198 in the Spring of 2017. I always manage to start off good for a few weeks and then lose motivation slowly gaining the weight back then losing again but never going over 220.
    Last summer I got married and lost my mother in law within a month time span, things have gone down hill fast since then. My husband and I currently live with his Father to look after him. The biggest challenge has been that my Father in Law refuses to eat anything cooked at home, no joke. My husband goes along with it as he does not want to upset his father, however he to is getting sick of it, but I finally said I am done. I can not eat out every day anymore, my weight went from 212 at the beginning of summer to 245 in the span of 10 months.
    I have my goal at 1.5lbs/week since it is the summer and I have more time, once I go back to work in September I will most likely reduce it to 1lb/week. My diary is closed for now because I want to keep myself accountable and log absolutely everything I eat, I worry that if I open my diary I will not log the bad things. My current weight goal is 175, which I realize is still about 40lbs higher than I should be but I want to get to 175 and see if I can maintain for a few months before trying to lose more.

    I am new to the community part of MFP but would love to have some like minded friends.
  • dawnkirkwood18
    dawnkirkwood18 Posts: 41 Member
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    Good evening. My name is Dawn. I am 44, current weight is 185. Highest was 353 about 10 years ago. I am 5’7”. At my lowest was 155-160 (about 5 years ago). I never hit my goal of 150 and have obviously gained some back. When I started tracking and working out again in December I was 210. Happy to be here.
  • bmeadows380
    bmeadows380 Posts: 2,981 Member
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    welcome, @dawnkirkwood18 ! I know all about losing, regaining, losing, regaining.....The first time I lost a lot of weight was in 2012 and I dropped 90 lbs from my highest at 380. Then I hit a plateau, and over the next 3 years, regained all but 5 of it back - but at least I didn't gain even more than that, like some people do!

    Then I started losing again 2017, lost 100 lbs, plateaued, but only regained 30 of it before losing again. I consider it a big win if I can stop at regaining only a portion; its an improvement from last time so I think it shows I'm slowly learning how this works, right?
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    Hello,
    My name is Rochelle, I am 33 and 5'4 currently weighing 245. I am not new to MFP but this time around I am determined to make the change permanent. My journey with weight loss started Jan of 2014 at 279lbs, I lost an initial 40lbs quickly but then went up and down every few months. The lowest weight I have seen since I started was 198 in the Spring of 2017. I always manage to start off good for a few weeks and then lose motivation slowly gaining the weight back then losing again but never going over 220.
    Last summer I got married and lost my mother in law within a month time span, things have gone down hill fast since then. My husband and I currently live with his Father to look after him. The biggest challenge has been that my Father in Law refuses to eat anything cooked at home, no joke. My husband goes along with it as he does not want to upset his father, however he to is getting sick of it, but I finally said I am done. I can not eat out every day anymore, my weight went from 212 at the beginning of summer to 245 in the span of 10 months.
    I have my goal at 1.5lbs/week since it is the summer and I have more time, once I go back to work in September I will most likely reduce it to 1lb/week. My diary is closed for now because I want to keep myself accountable and log absolutely everything I eat, I worry that if I open my diary I will not log the bad things. My current weight goal is 175, which I realize is still about 40lbs higher than I should be but I want to get to 175 and see if I can maintain for a few months before trying to lose more.

    I am new to the community part of MFP but would love to have some like minded friends.

    Hi @destiny_sierra Rochelle,

    You definitely seem ready to break free from the roller coaster. One of the issues that we can face when making plans is that we are already looking down the line more than we look at today, tomorrow, this week, and this month. Figuring out how to get through the current period of time as easily as possible always needs to be the higher priority. Having ideas about what you might do in 6+ months is fine but those plans are subject to life. I had a plan that I was sure I would do for the last 6 months that after I started in February was halted in March because of this virus.

    This group does not require open diaries or reporting actual weights. You can share as much or as little as you like. The ultimate goal of the group is to become an expert weight manager for yourself while you lose and the years of maintenance after. The idea is to learn yourself and also be able to separate fact from fiction (or at least not yet proven) when it comes to weight loss mechanics.

    Jump in anywhere. We are not a formal group.
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    Good evening. My name is Dawn. I am 44, current weight is 185. Highest was 353 about 10 years ago. I am 5’7”. At my lowest was 155-160 (about 5 years ago). I never hit my goal of 150 and have obviously gained some back. When I started tracking and working out again in December I was 210. Happy to be here.

    Hi @dawnkirkwood18 Dawn,

    Welcome to LL. I am glad you are here. You have already done an amazing job! I hope this time around you have even longer lasting success.

  • gates49512
    gates49512 Posts: 31 Member
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    Hello everyone,
    My name is Gary. I am 55 and have dealt with a weight issue my entire life. For so many years I would tell myself that "this is the way I am, the way I was built" and just went through life with that kind of attitude. But over the last 5-7 years I have am beginning to realize that my attitude and my weight has to change. For health reasons, I need change.
    I am not facing any major health issues, but there is something in my spirit that says, "it is coming". I am however, currently facing some high cholesterol, high triglycerides and a number of aches and pains in joints, back, etc. My A1C numbers are also beginning to rise.
    So, all these things I know and because of that my weight, and weight loss has been on my mind for a solid 3-5 years now. I can't seem to get out of my own way. I come here to MFP, log food, engage in exercise, eat cleaner...for a time, and then it always seems that I self-sabotage myself. I don't know if I just get tired of the routine, allow the busyness of life to get in the way, or even, somehow will not allow myself to embrace the "new me".
    It seems that I am caught in this crazy cycle of new changes, some success of weight loss, self-sabotage, defeat, regaining the weight then after about 3-6 months of being disappointed in myself, I start the cycle all over again. Even now, I am ready to jump into this group hoping I can find some success, but I were to be completely honest, just wondering how long I will fall back into the cycles from the past. I want to be successful, I have the desire to make changes and to lose the weight that I need to. So I am hoping that reading your stories will help me maintain the motivation that I need. Any suggestions of how to get out of my own way would be appreciated.
    Thanks for listening and any friend request would be appreciated as well.
  • conniewilkins56
    conniewilkins56 Posts: 3,391 Member
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    gates49512 wrote: »
    Hello everyone,
    My name is Gary. I am 55 and have dealt with a weight issue my entire life. For so many years I would tell myself that "this is the way I am, the way I was built" and just went through life with that kind of attitude. But over the last 5-7 years I have am beginning to realize that my attitude and my weight has to change. For health reasons, I need change.
    I am not facing any major health issues, but there is something in my spirit that says, "it is coming". I am however, currently facing some high cholesterol, high triglycerides and a number of aches and pains in joints, back, etc. My A1C numbers are also beginning to rise.
    So, all these things I know and because of that my weight, and weight loss has been on my mind for a solid 3-5 years now. I can't seem to get out of my own way. I come here to MFP, log food, engage in exercise, eat cleaner...for a time, and then it always seems that I self-sabotage myself. I don't know if I just get tired of the routine, allow the busyness of life to get in the way, or even, somehow will not allow myself to embrace the "new me".
    It seems that I am caught in this crazy cycle of new changes, some success of weight loss, self-sabotage, defeat, regaining the weight then after about 3-6 months of being disappointed in myself, I start the cycle all over again. Even now, I am ready to jump into this group hoping I can find some success, but I were to be completely honest, just wondering how long I will fall back into the cycles from the past. I want to be successful, I have the desire to make changes and to lose the weight that I need to. So I am hoping that reading your stories will help me maintain the motivation that I need. Any suggestions of how to get out of my own way would be appreciated.
    Thanks for listening and any friend request would be appreciated as well.

    Welcome to the Larger Loser Group...you have come to the right place...this is a very supportive group and we cover a lot of subjects....feel free to comment anywhere or ask questions...We are all taking different paths to reach the same goals...I am sure others will welcome you to this group...

    Please friend me if you would like to...I have been on MFP for a year on May 28 and as of this morning lost 75 lbs....I struggle most of the time to stick at it...I am about half way to my goal weight...i have learned a lot the past year...please reach out if you have any questions...someone will answer any questions you have or help you with goals,calorie needs etc...

    Best of luck!
  • bmeadows380
    bmeadows380 Posts: 2,981 Member
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    hi, Gary!

    One thing I suggest is looking back at your past efforts, what was the common denominator? Was it too much all at once? Too steep of a deficit? Cutting out a bunch of different foods to eat only "healthy"? Trying to take on a lot of activity at once?

    I think a lot of people get caught in the mindset that they have to lose a bunch all at once, and if they don't see these huge drops continue, they get discouraged and give up, especially if they radically changed many areas of their lives all at once. The key really is to take it slow and steady. Find something that is sustainable, and change little things here and there - make the process as painless as you can.

    So find a deficit that is sustainable - its recommended to lose no more than 1% of your current body weight, which for hte obese can be around 2 lbs/week; however, that doesn't mean you MUST set for that. A slower rate works just as well as a fast one; both require patience.

    Realize you don't have to cut out your favorite foods all together; just lean to moderate what you can to smaller portions or find ways to tweak the meal to get the calories down. For instance: Wendy's has a good calorie calculator on their website which lets you play with varying the ingredients in their items. Just taking the mayo off or the cheese can save a lot of calories! Getting a small fry instead of a large; get the small fry and a side salad; use half the pack of dressing instead of a whole one; if you want a sweetened drink, get a medium or a small instead of a large; get the junior frosty instead of a small, etc. If you want a candy bar, work it in or find someone to split it with. Get single serving packs of things instead of a big bag; sometimes its easier to moderate yourself to one small bag rather than trying to portion out a large bag. If you find something that you just can't moderate, then and only then put it aside and save as a rare treat.

    I've found that for me, I need as much freedom as I can; if I start telling myself no, you can't have that, or that's bad food, the guilt for failing to meet my internal standard really overwhelms me while the little kid inside stamps her foot and insists she wants it even more.

    But hey, it doesn't matter how many times you fall; what matters is if you get up and keep trying. the only way to guarantee failure is to quit trying!

    (I'll leave the rest of the advice to NovusDies :smile: )

  • gates49512
    gates49512 Posts: 31 Member
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    @NovusDies
    I think our stories do overlap a bit. Right now I feel a little frozen in time and space. I am beginning this cycle that I refer to... logging food, moving more, eating cleaner, etc. Yet in the back of my mind is this single little voice that keeps repeating "you have done all of this before and where has it gotten you?"
    I would be curious of what you did differently when you "accidentally" lost your initial weight? What is that I may have not yet tried?
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    gates49512 wrote: »
    @NovusDies
    I think our stories do overlap a bit. Right now I feel a little frozen in time and space. I am beginning this cycle that I refer to... logging food, moving more, eating cleaner, etc. Yet in the back of my mind is this single little voice that keeps repeating "you have done all of this before and where has it gotten you?"
    I would be curious of what you did differently when you "accidentally" lost your initial weight? What is that I may have not yet tried?

    I do not disclose the actual details for what I do for Lent but I cut back on something that was caloric.

    You have no doubt heard of someone losing weight because they cut out soda or beer. Think of it like that. I am not saying that is necessary it is just that for some people the first easy step is cutting out a calorie source that drops a person into a deficit. Some people do it with carbs. I call these "elimination" diets.

    I did not eliminate the item that caused my deficit past Lent though. In fact, one of my earliest rules was that I would not eliminate anything I could moderate. In the beginning I had trouble with moderating Reese PB Cups and jerky so I basically kept away from them. Later I learned I had progressed enough to safely eat them in small quantities again.

    I think the most important thing is to safeguard what is natural or normal for yourself. Change only what you have to change to get inside a healthy deficit and be satiated and in the realm of happy doing it. When you have accepted those changes as normal then and only then do you consider making more changes.

    The reason I preach "normal" is because I believe it is a mistake to try and lose weight. I believe it is more important to engage in a sustainable daily habit that results in weight loss over time. If you make drastic changes it won't feel normal and you will crave returning to normal. You resist it and it is harder to establish it as a habit.

    One of the earlier things I did was to train myself not to think of weight loss anymore than absolutely necessary. Thinking about it all day would just make me crazy like it always did before. This helped me to focus on being happy each day instead of expecting weight loss to make me happy or the scale to motivate me. I allowed time to pass doing what I do and when I got on the scale and it was down I considered it a bonus prize. Basically I became process driven instead of goal driven. The day became my goal. If I screwed up I would try to make the next day more successful.


    Below I will link my anniversary threads and a recent thought experiment thread. You may find something useful in them:

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10790230/what-if-you-needed-to-lose-weight-for-forever

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10731694/after-a-year-over-150lbs-lost-learned-a-few-things/p1

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10791606/2-years-over-200-pounds-lost-lessons-learned-and-life-changed


    If you are not satisfied with the answers given by myself and others please ask more. If you are satisfied but have other questions please ask them too. You might find this group to be a little different because we focus more on mindset than we do on method.
  • gates49512
    gates49512 Posts: 31 Member
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    @NovusDies
    Do I assume you tracked your food throughout your process? You are still needing to know if you are operating in a deficit, correct?
  • conniewilkins56
    conniewilkins56 Posts: 3,391 Member
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    I finished re reading all of the threads you recommended...every time I read them, I learn something new and I come away more determined to continue losing weight...I always tell people, if I can lose weight, anyone can...after years of gaining and losing and gaining I have finally started taking control of my own actions and I am becoming the healthy person that I want to be!...
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    gates49512 wrote: »
    @NovusDies
    Do I assume you tracked your food throughout your process? You are still needing to know if you are operating in a deficit, correct?

    From around the 6 week point forward. Since my weight loss was accidentally started it took me that long to realize it was happening and then make it a "formal" effort. I originally considered WW but my wife was told to use MFP by someone (I forget now) and I was resistant to it at first but I obviously wasn't for long.

    Calorie counting is not required though. It is a chicken and egg scenario. If you are losing weight you can prove you are in a deficit and on average how much. If you count calories you know your deficit and that you will lose weight.

    I prefer to count because it keeps me calm about scale fluctuations and prevents me from spinning my wheels for long periods of time. It was a hassle initially but after about a month I started to work out a good system for myself and then after the second month I could log quickly and it was minimal effort. Now I can ballpark my meals most of the time before I even log them.

    I do not care what people here do as long as they are healthy doing it and it fits within the definition of sensible and sustainable. I do not even care if people use another service or no service. Methodology is personal. When it comes to this subject I feel like our responsibility to each other is to provide possible puzzle pieces but you have to decide if any of them fit in your picture. In other words, look at what people do but don't just assume you can copy them. Experiment with ideas that speak to you. Some will work. Some won't.
  • laurahalford52
    laurahalford52 Posts: 14 Member
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    Hi im Laura
    5'2 and 219lbs, up until 8 years ago I was 138lbs, following 8 years of takeaways and sugar addiction here I am, unable to put my own pants on without getting out of breath. I caught sight of my bum over the weekend (I try not to look) and was absolutely disgusted with myself. So its time to make a change, its time to swap sweets for fruit, crisps with carrot sticks and start cooking again (something I have not done for a long time) My whole family has gained weight with me too and I feel guilty for that. Im not deluding myself into thinking this can be sorted in a matter of weeks, its taken me years to get into this mess and will likely take years to get back out of it but im willing to put in the work.
    I injured my back about 6 years ago which is where it all went wrong, before then I was riding 30 miles a day on a push bike so kept my weight under control with exercise, now I cant do that firstly because of my back problem and secondly because im so overweight and unfit. Well yesterday I got the bike out, pumped up the tyres and went for a gentle 30 min ride.
    This is my journey and only I can make it a success.

    Please feel free to add me as a friend, i will need all the support I can get

    Laura
    x
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    Hi im Laura
    5'2 and 219lbs, up until 8 years ago I was 138lbs, following 8 years of takeaways and sugar addiction here I am, unable to put my own pants on without getting out of breath. I caught sight of my bum over the weekend (I try not to look) and was absolutely disgusted with myself. So its time to make a change, its time to swap sweets for fruit, crisps with carrot sticks and start cooking again (something I have not done for a long time) My whole family has gained weight with me too and I feel guilty for that. Im not deluding myself into thinking this can be sorted in a matter of weeks, its taken me years to get into this mess and will likely take years to get back out of it but im willing to put in the work.
    I injured my back about 6 years ago which is where it all went wrong, before then I was riding 30 miles a day on a push bike so kept my weight under control with exercise, now I cant do that firstly because of my back problem and secondly because im so overweight and unfit. Well yesterday I got the bike out, pumped up the tyres and went for a gentle 30 min ride.
    This is my journey and only I can make it a success.

    Please feel free to add me as a friend, i will need all the support I can get

    Laura
    x


    Hi @laurahalford52 Laura,

    Welcome to LL. I can relate to purposefully avoiding viewing yourself. I did that for a very long time and I was a fairly successful at it. It didn't help with any of the physical limitations or pain from my considerable obesity but it probably helped keep me from allowing it to ruin my day anymore than it already was. Anytime I did see it was hard to take.

    Considering that eventually weight loss needs to slow down to remain healthy I think most people with Larger Loser levels of weight to lose have at least 2 years. Luckily it does not take all that time to feel the benefits of losing. Many people will experience at least a 'feeling better' NSV in around 5 percent lost even if some of that is water. Also, luckily, if you are kind to yourself and try to be happy during the process the two years can seem to go by pretty quick.

    Anyway, if you are not just here for friend requests jump into any conversation. We are not formal here.
  • Ragamuffin14
    Ragamuffin14 Posts: 189 Member
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    Hi everyone, my friend @gewel321 told me that this is a great group to join for some more community support. I am not yet comfortable enough to share numbers and pictures so I had started a private group "Started 2020 in the 300s" with others in the same situation for this purpose, but I look forward to getting more tips and tricks here!

    I got a slap of reality when I stepped on the scale Jan 1st, After ignoring my weight and the scale for a while... I am tired of being sore and tired carrying all this extra weight, and i think i hit my rock bottom.

    I have lost 100 pounds once before so I know I can do it again one step at a time!

    Good luck everyone in reaching your goals!!!
    Lyn