Thoughts, Epiphanies, Insights, & Quotables
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Hmmm ... I wonder sometimes why we go look into the tempting stuff
Mind you. There is a hint about size of deficits and duration that does impact how much we think about food.
For myself I certainly spend more time thinking about food when trying to implement a larger deficit than when not
Actually it's one of my hunger cues (that I'm thinking about food) to double check with logging because sometimes false and just bored, reward seeking, or other. But one of my cues I should prepare food.
And then I often feel getting physically hungry not even waiting for the food to prepare but munching stuff! apples used to be the go-to at that point. Now it's more varied2 -
I would think 'go looking for food' has long tentacles in culture and traditions... we think fun, party, feastly celebrations... and that is just a part of eating... add in essentials for the body to thrive... it is easy to be a food seeker, eh?
-- it is in the trying to change, reduce amounts or stop where i realized, hmmm, don't wanna stop mentally/attitude... afterall, i like food, it's pleasure, fun with others, even competitive like a pie eating contest... all these thoughts are part of embracing the good benefits in eating. The trick is stopping at enough.
So, relaxing, post-supper, content, satisfied, full even, not thinking of eating, enjoying the evening....
and blammo, a food ad comes on tv suddenly, vivid, people smiling, laughing, diving in.... and blammo, i want it too. It is almost, quite actually, an automatic response to the tv ad (trigger).
The difficulty lies in changing my response. The immediate urge happens. That is ok. The new response is to NOT put on shoes and go get some, rather, do something non-food instead (because already had enough at dinner and i REFUSE to let a tv ad be my reason to ovet-eat.)
However, i do not share the reactions these peeps have for salads, lol
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way too much loving for da salad!
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But it is kinda nice if someone prepares the salad for you - and serves you! I do get a bit of that salad happiness because eating a salad always feels like a victory
I made the time, had the ingredients, and feeding myself well.
My expression when eating "treats" would be nowhere near as joyful. It would be more sneaky and ashamed.
Was talking to a friend yesterday. As I prepare for my 5 day roadtrip to Newfoundland next week, she is preparing for a 6 day road trip from BC to Ontario the week after.
She was telling me how excited she was about preparing her road trip snacks. Her approach is that this is a free food time. Chips, chocolate, cookies. Whatever she wants - so that she doesn't have to stop at restaurants. I have NEVER had this experience. Where I joyfully, freely can have all the treats I want. NEVER EVER. Can't imagine that I ever will. It is a bit sad. Not that I don't eat way way too much of said foods, sometimes, sometimes often, but it is never with wonderful wild abandon.
(she is weight concsious - but at 71 maybe 20 pounds over her "ideal" weight - and strong and healthy and beautiful - so it feels like she has the eating thing under intuitive control - not someone who just eats madly and willingly/blindly pays the price - rolling her obese self around without care..2 -
OK boo!
1) I expect you will be losing a metric crap-ton while building a new house anyway
2) here is where *I* and, possibly you, fail. Crap ton of treats to be eaten in abandon and without conscience INSTEAD of restaurant meals.
Ask your friend how much variety and how many items her abandon is relative to my restraint and empty pantry!!!! And don't forget the INSTEAD part.
3) when I go to Costco I come back with a VARIETY of BOXES of treats. I am currently OUT of treats. ACTIVELY thinking of a Costco trip. Because wafers and chocolates not here, and the dark chocolate fig truffles.
Yet, I actually have Cadbury Eggs, swedish berries and fish (low reward 13g packs), a Cadbury chocolate bar out of the four I bought on Sunday, two kinds of sour patch kids, roasted seaweed, spicy rice crackers, almonds, peanuts, (the cashews are all gone), larger 100g packs of spicy peanuts, island pork bites (sweet jerky), thin addictives with cranberry almonds, six kinds of crackers including the premium plus and M.Y.Skyflakes, twizzlers orange creamcycle variety, starbursts, protein bars (2 kind), soft oatmeal bars 2 kinds, chestnuts, dried strawberries, figs, and dates, and goji berries no one will eat, and prunes, peach cups and fruit cups in the fridge, and ginger chews, possibly missing something from the inventory! I am not counting the kit kat and coffee crisp ice cream bars, or the "healthier" mango chocolate one or fruit juice made ones. Or the frozen fruit in the freezer.
Well. We know where I could run into a problem!
I am willing to bet that your friend will eat with abandon a multitude of treats. AND then she will stop because she will be satiated. say she eats two or three or four packs. That's 1000 Cal. No restaurants. Have a snack at a stop for another 250. Is she going to go over 2000 Cal a day?
While typing this I've consumed 850 Cal (doesn't take ME long!)... so I will stop now
BTW: I would think that restaurants would be necessary for PIT STOPS while driving and also forced rest breaks. Heck when I was driving around I used to hit every second Tim for coffee and washroom... though I do hope the girl washrooms are better maintained than the guy ones!1 -
Hmmm, if I were to inventory all the treatish, snackish foods lurking in my cupboards - I think it would also be a formidable list. All "betterish" versions, like clif bars (vs chocolate bars), light chocolate pudding, some Atkins dessert bars, fruit bars, trail mix with roasted edamame, grainy crackers, Pep'n cheddies snack packs, harvest snap peas and Veggie straws (vs potato chips) - you get the drift. But a shocking cache, nonetheless...that I rarely have the calories for when I am 'eating right' and getting in all the good stuff.3
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This topic fascinates me. I've just done an inventory of our 'stash'....it didn't take long. We have one unopened 100g bar of Lindt Intense Mint 70% dark chocolate , one 350g unopened bag of salted peanuts, 1 unopened packet of sfoglie and 6 ginger biscuits in the biscuit tin. And my husband has a 12x23g pack of Walkers Cheese and Onion crisps, because he has a 23g pack most days with lunch. I never touch them because they're his absolute favourites. The chocolate, peanuts and sfoglie are Christmas leftovers....
This is because we don't bring temptation into the house, because I've learned the hard way that temptation is harder to resist when it's close at hand. If it's in the house unopened I can resist temptation for months at a time...if it's in the house opened it calls to me incessantly. Better to not bring it into the house at all.
My neighbour texted me from hospital on Friday and asked me to go to his house and wait for his Tesco delivery and put the perishables in the fridge/freezer. He lives alone and in almost 4 years we've literally never seen him have a single visitor (not even at Christmas). When I unpacked his shopping it included 2 tubs of ice cream, 4 fresh cream and jam scones, 2 family sized bags of Cadbury chocolate buttons, 2 x 8 packs of Tunnocks Tea Cakes, a 350g bag of salted peanuts, a 6-pack of Kettles crisps and a 16-pack of 2 finger KitKats.
I didn't put the non-perishables in his cupboard (would have felt like snooping) but I put the cream cakes in the fridge and noticed there were 2 cakes already there and another 2 family packs of chocolate buttons....and in the freezer there were already 4 tubs of Ben and Jerrys.
I couldn't live with all the temptation....
...And even though they're not my cream cakes going slowly stale and past-their-sell-by-date, they've been really preying on my mind. I can't tell you how many times Kim and I have mentioned them in the past 4 days in 'casual' conversation.3 -
This is all very interesting.
I have no "treats" In my house. The closest I have is some almonds-raw unsalted... Some large flake oatmeal that calls out to me. Some brown sugar. Some Mexican hot chocolate "mix" Which is actually solid so can be eaten in a pinch though it's a bit overwhelming.
I don't remember the last time on my own I was "allowed" that stuff.
When my son's mother-in-law stayed with me a couple of weeks ago we decided to have a drink after a long day of driving. My housemate had a bottle of gin On the shelf in the kitchen 😁but we had no mix So I was heading out to the grocery store to pick up some club soda and tonic water and she said well if we're going to Have a drink pick up some chips and chocolate. It was so strange to have a bowl of potato chips and a big chocolate bar to openly snack on while we drank our gin and sonic.
Usually when I eat that type of food it's a sneaky thing. Part of a binge. Purchased and eaten before I even get home.
I think this is a problem...
No doubt part of the binge eating issue.
It's that openness that stuns me. Leaves me a little bit jelly.
I'm realizing that a lot of my overreading is coming as a result of having the car. I would even have a very difficult time going into the grocery store... My grocery store... And buying stuff for myself. You're very anonymous in the car in the drive-through.3 -
My drive will include lots of pitstops. The last time I made this trip We stopped about every three hours and I would go pee the dog would go pee we would stretch walk a bit buy a tea eat something (Only one restaurant ??? stop at a gas station With an attached restaurant that didn't even have a sign but where I had the best Western sandwich ever), put gas in the truck. It is a strong powerful truck that can pull my trailer of furniture and is very comfortable to ride in but it also has a hemi engine that just loves gas.
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Hemi gas mileage! 🤯
My stash is stupid but in general when I'm "upset" I buy the longest best before date items I can!
I hope your drive is a fun adventure Laurie1 -
Thank you!
It will be
The two encounters with women who ate "normally" was illuminating. Reading the "stash descriptions" was too. I realize I need to do something about my messed up relationship with food.
I'll be away for 6 or 7 weeks. Will try not to worry too much about what I "shouldn't" eat. That might be a good beginning. Shame is a very poor motivator. Just seems to backfire. I need to get past that.3 -
My stash is stupid but in general when I'm "upset" I buy the longest best before date items I can!
So...let me get my head around this. When you are "upset" and buy stash stuff. You buy with long term thoughts in mind - and it is a longish term if you have a "stash." What kind of quantities do you buy? Do you binge'ish" when it arrives in your possession - but you just buy enough to last past the binge stage? Or is there always some around so you don't have that response to treat foods arriving? HOW DID YOU GET THERE????????2 -
@lauriekallis ~ safe travels!
have read snackage with interest - it has been an evolving thing for me. I would love to be able to keep a candy dish like dad did or a snack drawer like sil or my boss who had a dedicated bin in the fridge... but just can't. if I bring it/anything in the house, it displaces real, nourishing food until it has been demolished... same goes for baking goodies... post-holiday candy sales, bogo sales @ the bakery. and not for the lack of trying or practice - i have just had to step away and release these kinds of things... until later, if ever, I could eat normally, say in an 80/20 moderation.
Current snackage on hand as part of everyday food; ritz/saltine crackers, variety single serv packages of roasted nuts, jar nut butters, dried plums, dried craisins, super dark 90/95% chocolate bars, mini-size street taco tortillas, whipped cream, cheese, clementine, schoolboy apples, sm bananas, seasonal fruit. 0 cal sodapop. Batchcooked ahead mixed veggies to heat & eat. A lot of my Snackage often is smaller versions of leftovers on hand.
regarding travel snackage... as a child, we had treats, someway, somewhere, wherever we went - so that became the thing. diets always before/after but unrestricted during travel or other events, always... Not good. Have worked to embrace making similar to real choices at home or from available drive thru. Sometimes a stop @ a grocery to pick up single serve things like cheese sticks, yogurt, piece of fruit, salad bar/deli offerings. And, like 1 typical meal/snack instead of unrestricted. Ongoing practice with this.1 -
lauriekallis wrote: »Shame is a very poor motivator. Just seems to backfire. I need to get past that.
This is very true, at least in my personal experience. I don't binge very ofen these days - maybe just a half a dozen isolated days per year instead of the weeks of uninterrupted binging of my teens and 20s - but when that urge hits me, I've learned that I simply can't control it. I just have to ride it out and try to mentally reset so that I'm ready to make better choices the next day.
For me, that mental reset comes from positive reinforcement rather than from negative bombardment. Negativity just doesn't work. I need positive reasons to make the good choices, so that choosing well isn't something I MUST do, but something that gives me a surge of genuine joy and pleasure. Although I'm not vegan I follow several vegans - and especially French/Italian/Spanish vegans - on Instagram because they post pictures of food that looks healthy, vibrant, and attractive ..when I see the photos it makes me WANT to eat food like that, and makes me remember that I feel good physically, mentally and emotionally when I nuture myself well...whereas the day of a binge (and for a day or two afterwards) I feel physically rubbish....not just mentally rubbish because of useless emotions such as guilt or shame, but genuinely, physically below par, with a queasy tummy and acid reflux....the vibrant food photos remind me of that...
Here's the sort of positive reinforcement I'm talking about....
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@Bella_Figura ~ same here... I was surprised the 1st time I drooled at the thought of veggies and stumbling across a multi-color kale @ the store was an exciting thing, I just had to buy & try. I discovered embracing the positive is profoundly more helpful than white knuckling for me too, and for similar reason - to nourish/help my body (born out of the recognition that I don't want to hurt my body.)
-- I stumbled on the thought when I was quitting smoking and mourning/grieving the quitting of something I enjoyed socially but needed to quit for my body. My thought was what if I started looking for the benefits of quitting instead of what I was missing.....
-- and inspired by Helen Keller thereafter... as I had to keep making that choice again, over and over after every crash... I likened it to looking back, sitting in a chair. Getting up, turning the chair around and looking forward. Same with food... That shift in approach, to get up, dust off, try more, seek food that is joyful and good for our body -- well eventually, that became my go to approach, and I sometimes need to consciously think it, do it, all the time... It is so different from dwelling in the sorrow of the crash... Although I will say that I do still grieve for things - when I choose to turn and explore nourishing foods.
my next adventure is a no knead focaccia bread - will be looking at flour options soon from a local grainery.
a fav frozen summer snack - frozen banana bites, dark chocolate, chopped nuts - similar to these.
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lauriekallis wrote: »Shame is a very poor motivator. Just seems to backfire. I need to get past that.
triple that - especially when applied by others... makes me want to eat more. Seems shaming or worse is still widespread at all levels of society/media... it does not help me, it triggers a 'bite me' response of anger that then triggers a dive into food response....
-- what surprised the heck out of me was to realize that we often take up where others left off and beat ourselves up as bad or worse... Stopping that takes a real shift in mindset - inner positive self-uptalk... I think the negative becomes a deeply ingrained habit - and if we believe it, then we are terrible - so how in the world could we ever actually lose weight, keep it off?
I had to elevate self-acceptance, help/accept myself over and above weight loss. If I never lose weight, well so be it... I REFUSE to beat myself up.... Just like anything else, I can and I will pursue my dreams - and my dreams, me, myself and I are as worthy of love, acceptance, life, health, family, friends, jobs, and everything else we call life... As much as anyone with any hair color deserves life.... We need to claim that, and hold onto it. We are worth it.
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Focaccia i want to try (snagged from forum meals discussion)
Quote...
A focaccia. This recipe is easiest to do in the evening to make a weekend morning treat as the dough needs a quick stretch every 30 minutes for two hours before going into the fridge overnight for a slow prove.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=O1WQTKuWWfM 1 -
I have a simplistic method of thinking or dealing with snacks. Would I feed this to a dog or cat? Would I allow a pet to eat this unrestrictedly? If I wouldn’t give this to my beloved pet, why am I serving this to myself?
I’m not speaking of quantity because humans eat more than most pets. It’s the quality of the food. Is it not harmful to let your puppy eat cream cakes, donuts, chips, candy, unlimited fatty foods? I have read how PAV’s puppy must have a special diet to stay well which he readily prepares for her.
This obviously doesn’t always work or come to mind. Like some pets I’ll get into the garbage can at times and give myself an upset stomach! But for the most part it keeps the quality/quantity of my snacking a bit better. Why treat myself worse than I would a furry friend?
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Good concept @Yoolypr
2 that help me (because change is 2 part, releasing the old plus embracing the new.)
Release
I would not put my hand on a red hot stove,
Embrace
I can do this
(current focus to choose nourishing food that i also like/emotionally satisfies. I never have to eat anything that revolts me, lol)2 -
Yes, most of my regular stash are stocking myself with 'goodies' that I can convince myself are goodies, but are in fact decent choices still, albeit they are often packaged processed foods.
My calorie allotment is primarily consumed with meals made with unprocessed ingredients, so the snacks just don't fit, but they're there, just in case...because I wouldn't trust myself in a store when the urge hits...I would not be choosing the 'better' options in that state. I can, of course, still overeat...trail mix, cheese, nuts come to mind.
I find intermittent fasting /time restricted eating version helps me with this as I work.hard on an attitude and habit of 'the kitchen is closed' in the evening and then want to have a 14+ fast period before eating again, and I think about how late will I need to wait to eat the next day before eating the night before. I won't go below a 12 hour fast, that's a personal hard & fast rule.
I always measure and record foods, doesn't mean I can't measure out some more or change my entry, but that practice helps me too.
And 0 calorie beverages are my friend after the kitchen is closed!4 -
The stashing is not primarily focused on goodies. They are a side effect not the primary cause. It is general. I mean I don't get one 12 pack of pop. I come back with 12 x 12 packs. Between a bowl of noodle soup and a 12 pack... it's a 12 pack! Same applies, I guess, to candy It's a mixed bag. It would be a lie to say that I don't over do it at times. But most of the times I do stay within calories. It helps that the budget is often in the 3K range. So 1000K of chocolate... still leaves room for nutrition. So I'm "cheating" in a sense. BUT missing on the beauty of the dishes Bella and our adventure lady create! 2
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Ohhhhh to have 3000 calories a day to budget with - or even 2000! I walk on average 16,000 steps a day, cycle 250km a week, work at my allotment for at least 10 hours each week from April to October and set reminders on my phone to get up and move for at least 10 minutes each otherwise sedentary hour, and all that activity nudges me to a TDEE of 1800 calories...
My TDEE at a SailRabbit's 'sedentary' activity level (Little or No Exercise, Moderate Walking, Desk Job (Away from Home)) would be just below 1400 calories. Sometimes it sucks being female, 5'1" and almost 60....4 -
@Adventurista, if you like baking no-knead Italian breads, this recipe for a no-knead Pagnotta works every single time. It's the best recipe I've ever found (and I've tried plenty!)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l-Zv60bkSME&t=54s
She also has a recipe for a fast and easy focaccia, but I've not tried the recipe yet...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z8d21Mc2V64 2 -
@Bella_Figura ~ ty. Will look at those too. I find myself nodding with everything and same with @BCLadybug888 ... it's good to know/meet other people dealing with these issues too.
@PAV8888 ~ i stock up on sales and staples too. The 70's toilet paper shortages inform my buying to this day, then repeat shortages the last few years, crazy. Re snackage, seems you can 'moderate' when you have on hand. I wish. It's a dream/goal
i do think foods move back and forth between can and can't moderate. I need to respect it when i can't and just put it in a time out zone until i can again.4 -
Adventurista wrote: »i do think foods move back and forth between can and can't moderate. I need to respect it when i can't and just put it in a time out zone until i can again.
So many ideas and experiences here to consider - wow this group is wonderful!
This struck me, Adventurista, because I like the flexibility of the thinking. And I love the word "moderate" rather than "control" - it feels less like something that my hamsters would feel the need to rebel against!
So much good food for thought.
Oh I love those pictures Bella - and the idea to focus on the goodness! I know these things, I really do, but sometimes they get lost in the white noise of life.
Thank you all for sharing.
I love your shopping approach, PAV!1 -
But trust me it is a come down when I get to play in Bella's league TDEE the other day barely licked 2K and I was crying in my soup! (well more like "leaking" into the poor soup but I figure crying is less graphical regarding the red nosed reindeer) Am I the only guy who thinks colds are a BIG DEAL?!?!?!?! <runs and hides> 2
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ALL guys make a big deal about being sick. 🤧 Most women - especially if they’ve birthed a baby or two - have learned to suck it up and carry on.1
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You mean there's more terrible things than a MAN COLD???🤯🤯🤯1
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MAN COLDS are pretty fierce from all accounts; as a woman, I wouldn't really know...😇
Get well soon Pav!2 -
Thank you colocational inspiration for your discerning understanding of the gravity of the situation. Swiftly disappearing reserves had to be replaced by Costco infusion but I'm somewhat resisting!
Instead of going in with buggy I just hit a beef dog and Pepsi zero At the food court and have now gone for a walk to explain to me that my throat is probably not ready for a twist cone!
At least my glasses are fixed! 🤷♂️
If I cave in on the cone it may end up costing me 754g of preplanned bunnies that were infused with 5oz of beef brisket (1050Cal ready to be warmed waiting at home)1
