Chat

cmsienk

Good morning. I'm packing once again - this time I'm heading out to NY. I fly tomorrow mid-morning into Newark. Back on the 20th. And of course, Dave leaves on the 20th for his next city on a 5-city tour he's working on. I think my arrival and his departure are less than an hour apart. We mayb see each other of our hats aren't too far away from each other.

Today we're hoping to blow out the sprinkler lines and then he needs help cutting a board.

Thank goodness I made chicken rice soup the other day. I think that and a salad will have to suffice for dinner.

Enjoy the weekend. I hope it's nicer where you live. It's drizzly and 48° here

connierandel

Sorry I haven't been on in a while. Life kind of exploded. I couldn't reach my mom on Friday (last week) and wound up calling police for a wellness check. They found her in the floor and she couldn't get up. She was in the hospital until Thursday, then was to be moved to a rehab unit. Unfortunately, the move didn't go as planned because she wound up with covid. She is in transitional care at the hospital for 10 days, then supposed to move to Dixon for 10 days. Now Bill and I are sick (Dr says respiratory) and haven't felt like driving 200+ miles home, or driving to hospital (fully gowned, gloved and 2 types of masks).

They are telling me that she will need long term nursing...that really hurts! And it will probably need to be in MO....but KCMO is only about 15 miles from where we live. They keep trying to get her on medicaid to cover it, but she makes a little too much, and has assets. We will see what happens. She will have the 20 days rehab, then 80 days skilled nursing covered by insurance. Anyway say a prayer for us. We need it!

And pray that Mom understands that she can't live in her house, or drive anymore!

Restfinder

That is the hardest part, Connie, when they realize that life as they've known it is over. It was a big deal for Mom to finally come to realize that she needed to move in with us, let alone go to a nursing facility. I hope that you are able to find a good facility. We had to leave her in one that was very institutional, but they were very nice and took good care of her. One thing that really surprised me - Mom had falling issues but they couldn't do anything to "restrain" her. The first day there she jumped out of her wheelchair and hit her head on her bed and had to go to the hospital. Then she kept trying to get out of bed and falling. They finally lowered her bed as far down as it would go and laid a pad down on the floor! I asked the nicer facilities if they could "restrain" her, put the belt around her that came with the chair, or tuck her blankets in around her so she couldn't get up so easily - none of them could do even those simple things. Mom ended up having to go to the hospital three times, the third time she ended up staying and passed just a week later. That's crazy! Especially for people who can't understand.

Cindy, we are rainy here as well, although not as chilly. My new plant loves the rain right now! I love the rain because I don't have to worry about watering any of my plants! heeheehee

connierandel

Kim - My cousin just passed away about 2 weeks ago. The family had the same issues with restraining her as with your mom. I told Angie (her daughter) what your facility did to try to keep your mom from getting hurt. I don't know what they finally did....but it wasn't restraint. My mom took a fall the first day she was in the transitional care unit. At least she wasn't hurt.

The nursing staff says that this "fog" that my mom is in comes partially from being totally isolated in the hospital, due to covid. Also the air machine in the room is REALLY loud and you can't hardly talk. They believe that Dixon will keep her past the 10 days and will go into the 80 days or 80% pay by medicare. They are "guess-timating" 30 days further rehab and she will probably be able to go into an assisted living facility. According to what I am being told now, it won't be an issue to get her into a facility in Kansas because she will be self pay, instead of medicaid. I have a couple of places to visit on tomorrow and Friday and at least one more that I really want to look at. The place I would like to see her go is income based and she won't qualify because of wise investments. I have a friend there that LOVES living there (3 years) and says how great the staff is and that even though it isn't a Christian run facility, that most of the staff are Christians and are always ready to pray.

I am looking at assisted living facilities that also have memory care on the same campus. That way if it becomes necessary, they can just transfer her. The one that comes very highly recommended will probably be the most expensive, but it is just about 2 miles from me. The other that I already have set up is less that 5 miles and is also almost new. She is really fighting me on moving, but I can't move there, so it is going to have to happen.

Bill had 2 appointments from his new medical care team. The first was the intake nurse getting him set up for weekly nursing calls and 2x weekly PT and OT. Sounds really busy, but at least it is here.

I am totally exhausted, so please keep saying a prayer for strength for me through this process, and that mom will like what I pick out for her. Just a studio apartment with her care level will probably run over $6000 a month.... hurts my head! Memory care would be considerably more and the skilled nursing would be more than double.

Restfinder

You are in my prayers, Connie, as are Bill and your Mom. It's hard to find a good home. We called A Place for Mom (I think that's what it's called) and they gave us two names we should look into. They were the nicest places, but neither one could take her. A lady from one of the homes called me or texted me and asked me how things were going even though they couldn't take her, she stayed interested and prayed for us. I'm so glad you are able to get that home care now! Praise the Lord.

We were able to get some paint for the kitchen and the paneling in the living room. There is paneling completely on one wall and then the other walls are half-paneled. They had dark trim on them which we painted white, and then decided that the room would look much brighter if all the half-paneling were painted white. We'll leave the window wall with the panel as it is. The drywall part of the wall is a pale teal color. The kitchen walls are going to be a slightly darker white, not ultra-white. The cabinets should "pop"!

Wade has a hernia, so a couple of the young guys from Church came and moved some of the kitchen furniture out of the way - phew. I've had to do some lifting myself to save him from that hernia strangulating. He has an appointment with the surgeon at the beginning of November.

Love and prayers.

connierandel

Praying for Wade!

I am using A Place For Mom as well. The place I visited today was beautiful, there were lots of activities, restaurant style ordering in the dining area on your time frame, the apartment is small, but doable, the staff was very friendly. Sounds great, huh? Very little true Christian influence, and it is so big and fancy that it feels like a resort, not a home. Pray that we find her a home, not a resort.

cmsienk

Praying that you'll find the right place for your mom, Connie.

Restfinder

Continuing to pray for you, Connie!

We are a bit warmer today. Wade and I are going to go for a ride, maybe stop at one of our water places for a bit!

connierandel

I found out about a place where a friend is living and it sounded so wonderful. A Christian community with a friend already there. When I called them, they only have 11 Assisted Living rooms and they are totally reserved for their Independent Living community when they need further assistance. I think that I was told that the lady from church is in assisted living, but really is in independent living. I don't think mom would do well with independent living.

Now I am back to the grindstone. That facility gave me the names of two other homes they are associated with, in the area that are supposedly assisted living. I went on the first website and all they show is independent living, as well.

I have one tour on Monday and am going to contact another place for a tour later in the day. It came recommended to a friend by one of her friends.... we will see.

I have gotten bad information from A Place For Mom and am trying to avoid them. Several of the places that they have given information do not have Assisted Living. The one closest to me, and the best rated one is only Independent Living. This is wearing thin!

I keep going back to the one that I toured the other day and it just doesn't sit quite right....I need homier, and hopefully a bit more Christian influenced. That place discontinued their Bible study because it was not non-denominational enough. I took that to mean that they didn't want the Bible really studied, but watered down. The Bible is the Bible and if it is taught, it should not matter what denomination you are. The basics are the basics across all evangelical denomination. Salvation through Jesus Christ is the only way to heaven; sin is sin and is defined in scriptures, all have sinned and unless sin is forgiven, we won't go to heaven. Don't water that down! Now, I am off my high-horse. Hopefully I find something soon.

Restfinder

Amen to that, Connie! It's amazing how people can twist the Word to say whatever they want it to say. I know that my God knew what He was saying when He in-breathed these men with His Word. Wasn't there a song that said, "God said it, I believe it, that settles it for me."? I heard John MacArthur once say, when he was reading a holiness verse, that it didn't follow their doctrine, that it was a problem - but that was God's problem so he wouldn't worry about it. They pick and choose what they will believe and make verses say what they want them to say - thus you have the problems! Many today are saying that God picks and chooses who are saved and who are damned and you don't have a choice in the matter! There is no "For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves..." "Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you shall be saved." "God desires all men to be saved..." Amazing! Oh dear, hot point for me!

I hope that you are able to find something for your Mom soon, Connie. Have you looked into home nursing or those services that have someone come in and help? It would still put your Mom farther away from you though, if she did that in her home. Just a thought which I'm sure you've already had!

Love y'all.

connierandel

I found a very nice place today that I felt much more at ease with, but still not a lot of Christian influence. They do have a Bible Study every week led by one of the residents. I am hoping that one of the ones I look at tomorrow is the one. It is a smaller home with larger rooms. It is on one level, so not as easy to get lost in. I drove by it today just to get a feel from outside and it is a lovely campus.

I am hoping that the other one I look at tomorrow isn't the one....it's half again as much money as the one today! I had to check it out, though. A lady from our church lived there before she passed and her family loved it. It has been sold since then, though. I have two tomorrow and two on Wednesday. Hopefully between those and the two that I have visited, something will stand out.

Restfinder

Praying you find just the right place!

Taking Premarin Mist and that has helped my breathing. Thank You, Jesus for helping it to work well. God is good!

cmsienk

Also praying you'll find just the right fit for your mom.

It's pamper me day... getting a pedicure this afternoon. Just a buff and shine - no color. My favorite part is the foot massage. 🥰 Ordered a Starbucks latte for pickup along the way.

Restfinder

I ordered some Starbucks Pumpkin Spice coffee pods. The first two tasted great, but then the next several have tasted like plain old coffee. I add my pumpkin spice syrup to it and my vanilla milk. I ordered some pumpkin spice oat milk to put in it and then just regular coffee when the pods are gone. I get six shelf-stable 32 oz containers so that should last me awhile. Yummers!

connierandel

I visited 6 different Assisted Living facilities. The first 2 were good, but so confusing. I was lost the whole time I was there. I knew I needed smaller so Mom would feel more at home. I found one all on one level and really liked the people. I thought it was probably the one, but still didn't feel quite right. The next one was another one that was multi floors, and a different area for everything they do.....and $3000 a month MORE than the others. The apartment was okay, but no better than the one level place. The last day I visited 2. The first one I LOVED the apartment, and I really liked the administrator that I toured with. It was less expensive than some, but it was HUGE and quite a bit older. I told the lady that my mom would be lost! She promised that it would be their job to make sure that she wasn't lost. It had a HUGE indoor swimming pool, hot tub and great activities. I called my step daughter and asked if she would go with me to tour the one level place and that one. Then, I went to the last place. It isn't one level, but it was much easier to get around. Her apartment would be about 50 ft from the elevator and if she went the wrong way, she would come to the end of the hall, so would know to go the other direction. When she would go down the elevator, she would be right in front of the dining room, the TV room and a little alcove. Basically all of the activities are in one of those three locations. The apartment is a good size, just doesn't have as much storage as the other....but maybe a bit more actual floor space. Terry and I are going there and touring it again on Monday. It felt like it would be easy for mom and a nice 1 bedroom apartment. Now, getting Mom acclimated to having to move to Kansas will be a huge issue...and getting her assets figured out for paying the rent. She has a ton of CDs, so we would have to take some penalties on the lower interest ones to start with.

cmsienk

Whew! I can't imagine how you kept them all straight! I'm glad you found one that you think will work out. Prayers for a little rest for you this weekend

Restfinder

Oh wow. In one way I'm glad you had so many choices, but it had to be hard to have to go through them all. So glad Terry is going to help you. You continue to be in my prayers!

I have been having breathing problems for a couple of weeks now. Years ago I was diagnosed with allergy-related asthma and took meds to help with that. The breathing resolved itself, other than the occasional one day when the issue would show itself, and then go away again. I started to take Primatene Mist to see if that would help, but, because it had epinephrine in it I sent a note to my NP's office to see if it was something I could take. They called back yesterday afternoon after having a doctor assess the situation and told me to STOP taking the Primatene. One time wouldn't hurt, but I should do more than that. Well, I'd used it seven or eight times! EEK! It helped a little bit, but not overall. I'm going to go in and see the Doctor on Monday (if it hasn't resolved itself by then) and see what she has to say. I've had all the asthma tests and they came out negative, had doctors listen to my lungs and hear nothing but clear lungs - so I just hesitate to go to the doctor with it because they aren't going to find anything. I think my allergy doctor gave me that diagnosis because he couldn't find anything but needed to put a name to it. Just like with my heart issue. There's a problem, but the tests showed a healthy heart - so they gave a diagnosis of inappropriate sinus tachycardia. No other doctor I tell that to has ever heard of it - I guess it's unique to me. All of these tests were done at least 10 years ago, and some even longer - so who knows, maybe they have answers now. I just can't afford to do all the tests until I turn 65 next August! But - Jesus knows exactly what is going on and He has the power to heal it. If that isn't happening, then He has another plan for why this is going on and I need to be open and ready for whatever He has purposed for this trouble. He is with us in the difficult times and in the good times and His word says we are to be thankful all the time (not for the problem, but that God is with us in the midst of the problem and He has something good planned to come out of it if we are faithful).

I hope y'all are able to have a restful weekend and a good time of worship on Sunday!

cmsienk

How did your second tour on Monday go, Connie?

connierandel

The tour on Monday went great and my stepdaughter loved the place. She just shook her head when we walked in and said that it was beautiful.
When we left I asked her for a one word description and she said, "peaceful". Now, there are a bunch of gears and cogs that need to fit together. If they don't mesh, we will be in a mess. And mom says she won't do it because insurance won't pay...but I told her they would be kicking her out of the nursing/rehab soon because insurance won't pay. I don't want her mad at me, but I think when we move her furniture that she will enjoy a nice apartment with familiar furniture and decor.

Restfinder

Connie, that is so important. Mom had a sister who moved in with her son and he didn't let her bring anything of her own. It was terrible. We determined Mom could have whatever she wanted (which ended up being her whole house of furniture and goods)! She really appreciated it because she felt at home. I'm so glad you found the right place. I will be praying that everything works out if God wants her there. I heard once that we begin with someone taking care of us and telling us what to do; then we get to be in that position where we take care of others; then we end up back where we started, someone taking care of us and directing our lives. Sometimes it feels like it happens way too quickly!

Saw the NP yesterday for my breathing trouble. My lungs were clear, praise the Lord for that. She thinks it's the GERD/acid reflux. I didn't know breathing problems came with that, but I've had breathing problems in the past and have struggled with acid reflux since my teens. I've been taking milder acid reducers, so she prescribed a full-strength one (one I'd taken in the past) and I need to call her in a week if that hasn't helped. I looked up GERD and breathing problems, and it appears that it's very common and GERD and asthma are closely tied. Some study done at Cleveland Clinic found that the majority of those who had asthma also had GERD, and those who had GERD were found to have asthma as well. Strange. They talked about aspirating stomach acid and not even knowing it. I've aspirated it a couple of times and known it! Wow, terrible burning in my lungs. I've probably had some damage from that, but it seems my lungs are working fine otherwise. They sound clear when she listens to them. So, I'm praying the pantoprozole works for this because not being able to catch my breath is tiring me out! LOL!

Love y'all.

cmsienk

I have felt so lazy this week. I did a lot last week to get ready for the kids coming over on Saturday. That always makes for 3 loads of dishes after they leave. And I just haven't recuperated from that very well.

We're up to 15 now with the 6 grandkids and two of our kids are adding to their families next year. My youngest daughter and her husband are expecting their 2nd in early February and our #2 son and his wife are expecting their 4th. Anyway, it'll be an even more delightful crowd when we all get together for holidays and birthdays next year. Not sure what we'll do for extra seating. Right now I have an extra high chair that my daughter bought to keep here and my dad's old high chair with no tray that we push up to the table. It's a nice problem to have.

connierandel

Cindy - so exciting to see the family grow!

Keep us in prayer- seems like I say that a lot! Mom isn't happy about moving, but it is now a done deal. She did very well with the facetime interview with Assisted Living. She is being released on the 10th, so we are trying to get everything moved and set up before that. She is a little nervous about learning a new routine, but I can't leave her in Dixon with me 200+ miles away. And the nursing home there is okay, but her room is just a room and shared at some point. She is being released because she no longer needs care, but cannot live alone.

Our biggest issue right now is trying to get people to help us load and unload the truck. So far, I have no confirmation of help in either place. I may be doing the lifting myself. I'm pretty sure we will be able to get people here, but Dixon is turning out to be very difficult. I don't even know where to hire...

Right now, my two step-daughters and son-in-law are coming down to Dixon on Wednesday and we are picking up a UHaul after they arrive. We will fill it and they will head back to Kansas. On Thursday they will take it to the assisted living and unload and set up her apartment. Bill and I will stay in Dixon to finish up business and get Mom on Friday. We should be taking her directly to an apartment set up with her furniture, clothes, decor, etc.

connierandel

Kim - I should have acknowledged the breathing issues. I have the allergy caused asthma. This time of year it is brutal, and then cold weather makes it hard to breathe. I am coughing now, but not what I would call an attack...not bad enough to use inhaler. When they were diagnosing me, and I was trying to find my main triggers, they had me on a med for GERD/Acid reflux. I knew that wasn't the cause, and they were pretty sure it wasn't, but they wanted to assure that it was actually asthma. I took the meds for a month, coughing like Barky the Seal the entire month. I'm so glad that I don't have those severe attacks often!

Restfinder

I think that the GERD med is working for me. I'm not struggling as much, and it's easier to catch my breath when I feel like I need that deep breath. I yawn a lot (which often has me sitting there with my mouth open while trying to get that yawn to catch - I had all of the asthma testing but it was all negative - I even had a breathing issue while taking the tests, having to stop so I could catch my breath - but it all came out normal. I never (and neither did my doctors) connected my GERD/reflux with my breathing problems, but they've always been there at the same time, so... I had tried to take the Primatene but a doctor in my PCP's office told me to stop, I shouldn't take that if I'm taking any kind of medication, let along heart medication. But it wasn't my lungs after all, so not a problem!

I'm so glad you found a place for your mom. I know how much they buck giving up their independence, but it won't be long before she is happy where she is, and finding new friends and activities will, hopefully, keep her too busy to stay mad for long! I'm so glad she will be near to you, so much easier to visit her. Hope all goes well with getting her moved. You continue to be in my prayers!

Wade's been painting! He finished the walls in the kitchen, they are a lighter color than the cupboards and they look so nice. We painted the living room a pale teal on the top and he is painting the paneling that is on the bottom a white and it looks so fresh! We left the wall that is all paneling alone, and one wall has the half and half, but that is covered with furniture, so we didn't mess with that one (yet)! He still has some outside stuff he wants to get done before winter hits, but we have at least a week of 60s and 70s coming up, so he has time! The posts holding up the little roof over our front door have rusted nearly away, so he is putting up wooden posts there, then getting more gutters put up and some windows caulked and he should be done with that. He has a hernia so he is trying not to do any lifting and taking things easier than he normally would. He goes to see the surgeon soon and will hopefully get that fixed. Getting old is sure not boring!

connierandel

I just have to give a testimony! When I went yesterday to pay for Mom's new apartment, they told me that there had been a change in the pricing of the units and care. They said that they would honor the price quoted on the apartment (which went up about $330 per month), but they would lower the cost of care to the new rate.

Let me just explain to you...
Cost of care that I was afraid she would qualify for - $3040 per month
Original Cost of Care that I hoped for - $1980 per month
Cost of care that she actually qualified for - $1220...I almost shouted Hallelujah when she told me that!
NEW COST OF CARE for same level care - 500 a month!

This took this beautiful apartment and complex to by far the cheapest one that we looked at. It was actually the second most expensive. If we would have signed a day earlier or a few days later, this would not have meshed like it did. ONLY GOD!!

cmsienk

Oh that is a wonderful testimony of God's provision!

Restfinder

Praise the Lord, Connie. Definitely see the hand of God in that!

Scary the hate going on in our country, and all over lies. It's not surprising, that the Jews have been hated since the days of Jacob when they retook the land promised to them by God. I would love to ask these people why they hate the Jews so much as they try to promote and vicious terror group. I saw on the news today that there is a man who is putting together The Voices Out of Gaza, Palestinians who are saying that the mobs around the world aren't helping them, but making things worse. It's Hamas who is making their lives miserable, not the Jews. Do you think anyone on the outside will believe those voices when they won't believe the pictures they have seen coming out of Israel and the unimaginable evil they did to Israel? I think they have let themselves be consumed by this propaganda. God isn't surprised, He told us that this was going to happen, it's still scary, because Christians will be next, and actually already have felt the hand of persecution. Thank the Lord we will be gone when the worst of it happens.

Still have breathing problems. Yesterday was very bad, today is a wee bit better. Friday and Saturday were pretty good and I thought we had found the answer, but yesterday was not good at all. I'm exhausted trying to catch my breath. I called my NP this morning and told her that I wasn't feeling any better than I did when I saw her last Monday, so she will have to come up with another idea since my lungs appear to be fine and the oxometer says I am getting enough air. God knows and He will lead me to the answer, heal me, or give me grace to deal with it - He is good and loves me no matter what.

Restfinder

I had some blood tests and a chest x-ray yesterday. The x-ray was fine but one of the blood tests for blood clots was high, so I am going to have a CAT scan this morning. Please keep me in your prayers. Love you

cmsienk

Sending prayers your way, Kim.

connierandel

Kim, I am praying for you! I also wanted to let you know, that even when my asthma was its absolute worst, my oxygen levels were good. That's the reason they tried the acid reflux meds on me. When they ran the panel of allergies, they changed their minds....I am allergic to everything.