March/April BED Conversation Thread
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I did well last night i think, i only ate a bowl of cereal, (rice chex) and managed to talk myself into NOT eating the box, only one bowl. That was a huge accomplishment for me.
Mary Beth: Congrats! That's a huge achievement! Proud of you! Way to go!:flowerforyou:0 -
:flowerforyou: yay Marybeth. We get it! it is a big accomplishment0
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How do you quote and write a reply, i wanted Bathsalts to know she is not alone, i was the victim of a very violent attack, the guy thought i was dead when he left, that i am sure of. Just want you to know that i can so relate to your post. Hugzzzzzzzzzz
Hugs Mary Beth! I think you meant rainyday. BTW - Just hit quote under the person post you want to capture and you will get quote.
HUGS Mary Beth. Sucks that so many people can relate, huh. Sorry you had this, too. Hubby doesn't understand why it still haunts me, 10 years later. I can see his point of view - it's a hard thing to carry around. But it's even harder to let go.0 -
Good morning Friends. Welcome to all of the new people and thank you for sharing your stories. I really appreciate hearing other people's experiences, good, bad or indifferent. They all help. Interacting with other people who struggle with bingeing is a good learning experience. I remember a time when I thought I was such a freak. What a difference it has made for me to know there are other people with similar issues and that it isn't just me! I'm not a hopeless case. It's not my fault that I developed this type of behavior, and now I know it has happened to other people too. And it's not their faults either. It is unfortunate that this is our reality, but now that we know what the issue is, we can work towards resolve. Recognizing and identifying our behavior patterns are important. Ignoring them does not help.
The things I need to practice this week are patience, forgiveness and understanding.0 -
Sorry to just blurt this out... but I was raped 10 years ago tomorrow. My eating this week has been extra crazy. I've booked my day pretty solid tomorrow and Saturday so I hopefully won't have time to curl up with a bag of chips or 12. I went back on anti-depressants about 6 weeks ago, in the hopes that it would help get my moods, and therefore my binging, under control. Worked for the first 3 weeks but I've been 'down' for the last 3. The first down week, I attributed to hormonal changes the week before my period. The last 2 weeks I figured was due to the impending 'anniversary'. Next week, I'm headed into PMS land again. I have no idea when my hormones should be balanced out again, no idea how long to give this before I go back to my dr. *sigh*
TRIGGER WARNING:
I was raped in 1996 and I still have never dealt with it. I don't know if it affects my eating so much as my intimacy. But yeah, that can screw you up. And it's funny what can trigger you. To this day, I can't listen to Bob Marley music because that's what was playing.
So in the past week, I haven't binged so much as I've restricted and purged. It sucks because I actually am down about 5 pounds in this week. So in a sick sense, I'm seeing results from going about it in a horrible way. This is an absolutely horrible thing, and I would never want anyone else to do this, but I don't feel horrible about doing it.0 -
:drinker: no serious bingeing here but those chocolate kisses are throwing off my calorie intake :mad: Lots of stress at work . Last night I ate more than I needed to . Woke up in the middle of the night with the urge to binge but fought the feeling off and thankfully fell asleep. One change I want to make this week is to send any goodies I get for the grandchildren home with them. My pants are tight again so I know I need to lose......that won't happen if I keep eatting high calorie stuff. On the one hand I don't want my world to revolve around the addiction ....on the otherhand for my own well being I need to lose. ( think I just got three hands:laugh: :laugh: )Well , that's my vent for the day. Richie0
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Sexual Abuse victims are near and dear to my heart. :flowerforyou: Sexual Abuse is one of the most devastating things I can think of to happen to a person. :brokenheart: Unfortunately, it is very common for a victim of sexual abuse to develop an eating disorder.
*Taken from: www.eating-disorder-information.com/sexualabuse.php*
Sexual Abuse and Eating Disorders
Studies show that there is a relationship between sexual, emotional and/or physical abuse and the development of an eating disorder.
Many sufferers of sexual abuse have turned to eating disorders and have found that their eating problem helps to protect them, repress or block out their painful memories, and numbed their feelings.
Victims of sexual abuse most often develop "coping mechanisms" to survive the memories of the abuse. Eating disorders like anorexia, bulimia, binge eating and complusive eating disorder, and self-harm, are among these mechanisms.
Eating disorders may have helped sexual abuse vicitms block out their feelings and memories for a while, but it is a very destructive way of coping.
For many sufferers of sexual abuse, eating disorders have been their only means of survival for many years and it is difficult to recover because of the fear to give it up. They are not sure if they can survive without their eating disorder.
*Taken from: www.joshuachildrensfoundation.org*
A VERY HIGH percentage of persons with BULIMIA and EATING DISORDERS, Alcoholism,
and addictions have been sexually abused as children.
Victims of sexual child abuse most often develop "coping mechanisms" to survive the memories of the abuse. Among the MANY coping (and not coping so well) mechanisms are the ones listed below:
Compulsive Eating Disorder
Eating Disorders
Bulimia
Bulimia Nervosa Eating Disorder
Binge Eating Disorders
Anorexia
Alcoholism
Drug Addiction
Suicide Attempts
Gambling0 -
The things I need to practice this week are patience, forgiveness and understanding.
This week, I am practicing asking myself "am I hungry'? and if not indentifying the reasons I feel the urge to eat or binge.
Please share -- if anything what your are working on this week? Thanks for sharing Diane and the idea!0 -
Welcome newbies! and thanks for sharing too. My heart goes out to each and everyone of you
I am doing pretty good this week. I am getting busier if possible to avoid binging.
Thanks Diane for that article. Very informative!0 -
Binged on cookies yesterday, 1500+ calories worth. Feeling like - well, you all know what it feels like the day after... bleh...0
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Binged on cookies yesterday, 1500+ calories worth. Feeling like - well, you all know what it feels like the day after... bleh...
Thanks for sharing my friend. I hope you are able to clear your head of the guilt. You are stronger than the disease even though it may not feel like it right now. :flowerforyou:0 -
:flowerforyou: Thanks Diane, you know when I think about my issue is does stem back all the way to childhood. In my case it was an older brother and neighbor boy................never really put the two together before. .......been so many years ......and I am not one to dwell in the past.....but you have me wondering now....Took a short walk with a friend yesterday and that was it. Lots of meetings .
Mollie , I think I will ask myself that question and eat slowly:laugh: Hugs Richie0 -
How many times a day do you think about something you dislike about yourself, or you need to work on or improve about yourself, or something you did wrong (or not completely perfect)? How many times a day do you think to yourself that you’re not good enough and you could or should be ‘better’? How many times a day do you look in the mirror and frown because you’re not seeing what you’d like?
And how many times a day do you think about something you like about yourself, or did well or are proud of or have accomplished? When was the last time you looked in a mirror and smiled at yourself?
If you’re like me, the number to the top set of questions is very high and the bottom set of questions very low. If I am not mistaken, this is a pattern common to all those with EDs. Could you imagine your life if the statistics of these two opposing forces were the complete opposite of what they are now? How liberating that would feel!
What would it be like to look in a mirror and be content with what you see, or at the very least cease to judge the image? What would it be like to only think about things you do well? What would it be like to feel pride every day? How would my life be different if I constantly thought positively about myself? What would it feel like to like myself?
This is something I think about a lot. I want to like myself. I deserve to feel good about myself. And NOW. Not when I get back down to the weight I was last Fall. Not when I get under 200lbs. Not when I have a healthy BMI. Not when I have another man in my life. Not when I own my own home. Not when I _____. Now. As is. Imperfections and all.
Other people get to feel this, why shouldn’t I be able to? Exactly what you’re thinking – I should! We all should.
We have spent far too many years focusing on the negative questions above. We need to work on focusing on the positive ones. Even though it will be difficult. Even though we don’t want to. Even though we don’t feel like it sometimes. In order to feel better about ourselves and improve our self worth, we have to redirect our thought processes about these things. It will take hard work and determination and we will have to continuously remind ourselves to keep doing it even if we’re not feeling the positive effects. Nothing is going to change otherwise. And no one else can do it for us.
No one else can make us feel a certain way about ourselves deep down inside. Of course there are and always will be external factors to take into consideration. But at the end of the day, it is only we, ourselves, which can make determinations about our self worth.
Diane 0 -
Great post, Diane. I'm going to share it with my son.
I have a victory to report--didn't eat the whole box of Cheezits tonight!0 -
I'm a full time student and almost done with this semester. I decided to take the summer off and use the time to work on me.
My goal is to find a therapist or something, to help me address this issue. I have never tried to focus directly on it. I've tried counseling before and the ED only comes up in a side note. Ya know? I understand that many think I have to deal with the reasons I turned to binge eating in the first place, but I'm tired of that and want to see what happens when I focus on this problem. I'm sure the other stuff will come up, eventually.
Does anyone have any suggestions as to where I should go or things I should look into?
I'm in Oregon, BTW.0 -
I'm a full time student and almost done with this semester. I decided to take the summer off and use the time to work on me.
My goal is to find a therapist or something, to help me address this issue. I have never tried to focus directly on it. I've tried counseling before and the ED only comes up in a side note. Ya know? I understand that many think I have to deal with the reasons I turned to binge eating in the first place, but I'm tired of that and want to see what happens when I focus on this problem. I'm sure the other stuff will come up, eventually.
Does anyone have any suggestions as to where I should go or things I should look into?
I'm in Oregon, BTW.
Hello there. Thank you for joining our group. I would recommend looking into an ED program that offers DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) or CBT (Cognitive Behavior Therapy). If you're curious, I blogged about some of my experiences w/ DBT last summer (May-July). You can find my blog info in my profile. Another Member of this group, Mollie1037, also has experience with this and has blogged about it as well.0 -
I'm a full time student and almost done with this semester. I decided to take the summer off and use the time to work on me.
My goal is to find a therapist or something, to help me address this issue. I have never tried to focus directly on it. I've tried counseling before and the ED only comes up in a side note. Ya know? I understand that many think I have to deal with the reasons I turned to binge eating in the first place, but I'm tired of that and want to see what happens when I focus on this problem. I'm sure the other stuff will come up, eventually.
Does anyone have any suggestions as to where I should go or things I should look into?
I'm in Oregon, BTW.
Hello there. Thank you for joining our group. I would recommend looking into an ED program that offers DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) or CBT (Cognitive Behavior Therapy). If you're curious, I blogged about some of my experiences w/ DBT last summer (May-July). You can find my blog info in my profile. Another Member of this group, Mollie1037, also has experience with this and has blogged about it as well.
Yes both of use have had group therphy on this matter, which was last year. It is hard to seperate the 2 but sometimes we just binge because it is habit from bordem, loneliness, etc. These programs offer stragies on how to cope with ED. If you google DBT and CBT spelled out it should bring you to the therpist and programs available in your area. The ED program I was in has BED people in the same group with ones with Bulemia and anorexics. Because we all binge.
I am still paying for my program now but it was worth every dime. My insurance paid for the majority of it. My cost was about $600 to $700. Feel free to email me if you have any more questions.0 -
Thanks so much, ladies :flowerforyou:
I will look into programs and at the blogs when I have time to focus.0 -
Just joined the group.. binge eating is a pretty big ruler in my life, its brought down my social life, personal life, academic life..thoughts about myself, etc. I'm in College-- so it's been hard to balance it all. So anyway, Feel free to add me
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Welcome Brady! I'm Diane, and from Wisconsin also. :flowerforyou:0
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Hello all,
How did you all's weekend go? Yesterday I had a contained binge
Definition and only my definition of contained binge means not a full blow out binge if you know what I mean. I was fighting it until the end and I fought the urges with all I could and I did OK but still munched here and there. I can say I did have some good mindfulness and was successful by not have a blow out day. Saturday and Friday nights were fine. Friday I was out and Saturday busy too. Usually Friday is my binge night and I did not binge Friday.
Any successes, thoughts, or shares are welcome now that the weekend is over? I know for many of us bingers the weekends can be very challenging so I know you all something to report. Good, bad or ugly let's hear it please.:smooched:0 -
My purge-free streak has now hit Day 20! I hope I can keep this up!
LIke Mollie, I still have binged but I've been stopping the binge way before I would have in the past. Next goal is to try to minimize the binges even more, but I'm feeling good.
How's everyone doing?0 -
In the current book I’m reading called, “Life Without Ed” - written by Jenni Schaefer with Thom Rutledge, the author uses Ed as an acronym for Eating Disorder.
She writes:
“Although I see Thom for “individual” therapy, there is a whole group of us in his office for each of my sessions. In fact, every place to sit in his office is occupied. Ed is sprawled out on the couch, while Thom and I sit in two cushioned chairs. And in the straight-back wooden chair sits Ms. Perfectionist, with perfect posture.
You see, Ed has many colleagues. Thom refers to one as the Should Monster, who tells me everything I should or should not have done in my life. I frequently hear the Timekeeper, who keeps a close eye on how I spend every minute of my day – making sure that each moment is spent productively. And I hear Ms. Perfectionist compromising to stay in line with the Timekeeper, promising she will make me perfect.”
These paragraphs have Diane written all over them! I’ve known about Ed, Ms. Perfectionist and the Should Monster for quite some time now, but this was the first time I was formerly introduced to the Timekeeper. To know that I am not the only one driven by the Timekeeper is pleasantly comforting.
When I began seeing my behavior therapist again in January this year, my obsession with time was the main behavior trait I wanted to discuss. It really helped to talk about it. It helped to have someone play devil’s advocate and force me to answer why I feel the way I do about time. At first I didn’t have any answers. Another helpful tidbit is to put myself in someone else’s shoes and try to guess how they would be feeling about the same time sensitive situation. For a little over a month I tried different exercises to bring me away from my comfort zone with time, and although uncomfortable, I know it made a difference.
Ever since my mom’s stroke at the end of February I have been forced to have a better relationship with the Timekeeper. Ms. Perfectionist needs me to be the perfect daughter, but the Timekeeper doesn’t understand that spending time with a loved one in need is a valid way to spend time. They still butt heads, but the compromising is getting better.0 -
Thanks so much for sharing Diane! Food for thought for me for sure.0
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:flowerforyou: Thanks Diane, I have always seen the binge part but not so much the time keeper.................almost like siblings for me.......fighting for attention. Richie0
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Binged tonight on my old nemesis--Cheezits--but at least I know why. It was because of work-related stress; I ate while I wrote up an article for my boss. I was stressed because I had missed two days of work due to the stomach flu and was catching up on a backlog. I crunched and typed, typed and crunched. Hope it doesn't ruin my weight loss from the flu!:laugh:
But, on the good news front, I went 24 days without purging--almost a month!0 -
Last day of the month. I hope everyone had a pleasant and relaxing weekend.
As I mentioned on my newsfeed, I'm feeling very positive about a fresh start beginning today. I have the first of 24 personal training sessions scheduled for this evening and I am determined to log my food openly & honestly for the entire month of May. Mentally & physically, I have got to get back in the zone!
Does anyone else have any goals for May?0 -
Please see conversation thread below for the next 2 months:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/582481-may-june-bed-conversation-thread0
This discussion has been closed.