Dinner date- who pays?
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I don't ask guys out ever so he'll pay at first... but if we're out having drinks I will offer to get a round or so. Later on if we start to date more often, I'd definately help out paying for dinner or events every now and then.
Every now and then? lol
Do you think the guy should pay what, like, 50-70% of the time?
I think once in a relationship, things should go 50/50 on most occasions, cept of course when there are special occasions or you're feeling nice
I'd go 50/50. I'd just make sure my 50 was a redbox and some takeout...
Just kidding!
I love spoiling and can get out of hand.
perfect night lol0 -
No one... you use coupons to get the bill down to zero and thusly don't need to tip.0
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When I take a girl out for dinner for the first couple of dates, I dont EXPECT anything. I would hope that she had a great time and if the moment arised, would show some appreciation in a kiss!"
I guess that just makes me wonder why the thank you/appreciation has to be physical. If I have a great time with a guy, I will say thank you. I think that is more of the point JanieJack was getting at. Why isn't a thank you enough?
It is enough. I think you are missing the pint where I clearly stated I don't expect anything. Like I said after the first couple of dates if the moment raised I would hoped she kisses me. Is that not a fair feeling? For someone that you like that you've been out with a couple of times that you might actually like to be kissed by them?
I would no longer spend my time or money on someone that didn't want to kiss me on a second date *shrug*0 -
I typically expect to pay if I ask, if she asks, then I still try to pay. Just the way I am. Once it's a relationship after 2-3 dates splitting is fine, but I'm one to enjoy things along the lines of a gift or something instead. I'm comfortable w/ paying, but don't mind splitting. It's nice and most women enjoy being able to do the same.
Current setup is now that I paid on our first date a few weeks ago and when we go out Friday I'll pay and we split rounds at the bar. When I'm where she lives, dinners on her.
But it's also about the small things too, especially w/ the new girl.0 -
When I take a girl out for dinner for the first couple of dates, I dont EXPECT anything. I would hope that she had a great time and if the moment arised, would show some appreciation in a kiss!"
I guess that just makes me wonder why the thank you/appreciation has to be physical. If I have a great time with a guy, I will say thank you. I think that is more of the point JanieJack was getting at. Why isn't a thank you enough?
It is enough. I think you are missing the pint where I clearly stated I don't expect anything. Like I said after the first couple of dates if the moment raised I would hoped she kisses me. Is that not a fair feeling? For someone that you like that you've been out with a couple of times that you might actually like to be kissed by them?
I would no longer spend my time or money on someone that didn't want to kiss me on a second date *shrug*
funny. i dont give anyone a 3rd date who hasnt went in for a kiss. it hasnt happened often but it has happened. i kind of take that as a sign that the guy isnt physically attracted to me.0 -
When I take a girl out for dinner for the first couple of dates, I dont EXPECT anything. I would hope that she had a great time and if the moment arised, would show some appreciation in a kiss!"
I guess that just makes me wonder why the thank you/appreciation has to be physical. If I have a great time with a guy, I will say thank you. I think that is more of the point JanieJack was getting at. Why isn't a thank you enough?
It is enough. I think you are missing the pint where I clearly stated I don't expect anything. Like I said after the first couple of dates if the moment raised I would hoped she kisses me. Is that not a fair feeling? For someone that you like that you've been out with a couple of times that you might actually like to be kissed by them?
I would no longer spend my time or money on someone that didn't want to kiss me on a second date *shrug*
funny. i dont give anyone a 3rd date who hasnt went in for a kiss. it hasnt happened often but it has happened. i kind of take that as a sign that the guy isnt physically attracted to me.
You should kiss on the first date.
Doesn't have to be full blown make out clothes ripping off sessions, but at least something.
if each is interested that is.0 -
I would no longer spend my time or money on someone that didn't want to kiss me on a second date *shrug*funny. i dont give anyone a 3rd date who hasnt went in for a kiss. it hasnt happened often but it has happened. i kind of take that as a sign that the guy isnt physically attracted to me.
This is so weird to me! Maybe in the minority lol. But I've been on two individual dates with this one guy, and we've hung out in a group setting on two other occasions recently, and we're going on a group outing tonight to dinner. We definitely won't be kissing for a little bit I think, even though I do like him and he likes me.
So don't always assume that someone doesn't like you because they don't want to/are not comfortable with physical affection so soon!0 -
I would no longer spend my time or money on someone that didn't want to kiss me on a second date *shrug*funny. i dont give anyone a 3rd date who hasnt went in for a kiss. it hasnt happened often but it has happened. i kind of take that as a sign that the guy isnt physically attracted to me.
This is so weird to me! Maybe in the minority lol. But I've been on two individual dates with this one guy, and we've hung out in a group setting on two other occasions recently, and we're going on a group outing tonight to dinner. We definitely won't be kissing for a little bit I think, even though I do like him and he likes me.
So don't always assume that someone doesn't like you because they don't want to/are not comfortable with physical affection so soon!
no you might be fine. age is also a factor. i'm like 15 years older than you. trust me when i was your age i definitely appreciated the slower speed dating and liked building friendships with guys before moving to courting
i think the difference is that now i'm less interested in meeting a "friend" :laugh: i have plenty of friends to hang out with, most of them are women. at this age i want to know we have physical chemistry.
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It's a shame that there are douche bags like that and I can't stand being put in the same basket, considering myself to be a genuine all round good guy.
One person's all-round-good guy is another person's bad date story.
As an example, I have a friend who is the ultimate gentleman, to the point where he always stands when a woman approaches or leaves the table. I find it extremely annoying since our dinner groups boast 6-7 women each time and most of us know half the town so we're always getting up to say hi to someone. He spends half the meal standing. My friends find it gentlemanly and endearing. I find it annoying.
And, no, I'm not just saying this because you're asking in another thread if a woman you meet in the near future would be upset that you're already planning a trip with a hot girl 3-4 months from now. I wouldn't fault a guy for that (but I wouln't be exclusive with him either), but many girls I know would consider that douchy behavior.
I don't think there are any right or wrong answers here, just what works for your life.0 -
You should kiss on the first date.
Doesn't have to be full blown make out clothes ripping off sessions, but at least something.
if each is interested that is.
To each his own... I wouldn't initiate a kiss on the first date, unless it's an old friend (possibly someone I knew while married). If I like the guy, and he initiataes I'm not saying I'd turn him down but I'd really want to get to know someone before we start swapping spit.0 -
Curious about something.
A guy does all the right things that ladys expect,asks out,plans everything,pays the whole shot through 2 dates.
There is nothing really to find fault about but you just don`t feel anything special happening.
He asks you to go out again...what happens now?0 -
At this stage, you have texted her like a madman and she has not replied to your texts (because she's not so sure), and then she says to all of her friends that you're a freak and that this explains why she didn't feel any chemistry. And that you should have gotten the hint by now.Curious about something.
A guy does all the right things that ladys expect,asks out,plans everything,pays the whole shot through 2 dates.
There is nothing really to find fault about but you just don`t feel anything special happening.
He asks you to go out again...what happens now?
You either blow her mind and own her, or you're doomed.0 -
Curious about something.
A guy does all the right things that ladys expect,asks out,plans everything,pays the whole shot through 2 dates.
There is nothing really to find fault about but you just don`t feel anything special happening.
He asks you to go out again...what happens now?
I would just say something like "it's been fun getting to know you, you're a really nice guy" as I leave the date and end it there, instead of saying ,"i'll call you or talk to you later." Hopefully he would take the hint. I don't think I could say "i just don't like you" to someone. But I would make it known through my actions.
That's probably not the answer you wanted haha0 -
Curious about something.
A guy does all the right things that ladys expect,asks out,plans everything,pays the whole shot through 2 dates.
There is nothing really to find fault about but you just don`t feel anything special happening.
He asks you to go out again...what happens now?
I would just say something like "it's been fun getting to know you, you're a really nice guy" as I leave the date and end it there, instead of saying ,"i'll call you or talk to you later." Hopefully he would take the hint. I don't think I could say "i just don't like you" to someone. But I would make it known through my actions.
That's probably not the answer you wanted haha
There is no answer I want actually,just for people to stop and look inside and be honest to themselves.
It sounds like you are saying you would try politely to not let it get to the point of asking or have laid the groundwork for a refusal.
That seems more then fair and courteous. :flowerforyou:0 -
Late to the scene that I am.. (ha! typical) I let the guy pay for the first date.. maybe the first couple... but then.. I like to pay if they will let me every other or so.. it's just not fair for him to pay all the time..
As to kissing on the first date.. that all depends on the physical attraction... I try to know a guy fairly well before the first date.. so I know if I like him or not.. the physical reaction/attraction dictates a kiss or not..
Lots of men are gentlemen. They want the chance to show it.. 0 -
There is nothing really to find fault about but you just don`t feel anything special happening.
He asks you to go out again...what happens now?
In the past, I've scheduled other plans and usually they move on without asking why. Two guys I've had to tell specifically I'm just not feeling it and don't want to waste his time when he could be out searching for "the one." One got very upset with me, not because I told him I was no longer interested, but because his next question was "ok, then, would you set me up with so-and-so" and I absolutely refused.0 -
Curious about something.
A guy does all the right things that ladys expect,asks out,plans everything,pays the whole shot through 2 dates.
There is nothing really to find fault about but you just don`t feel anything special happening.
He asks you to go out again...what happens now?
i'll admit. you guys dont have it easy when it comes to wooing chicks, since we tend to want a mix of the expected and the unexpected.
but really just DOING the right things isnt enough, especially it it's to the point where the guy who too busy concentrating on doing and saying the right things instead of relaxing and letting more of his personality come through. do the right things, let your personality come through and make sure you're exploiting any common interests, experiences and goals. all of that helps create chemistry.
if i dont have chemistry with a guy by the second date then i definitely dont allow any kisses and i'll say something like "it was great getting to know you and good luck with xyz". hopefully the guy takes the hint that i'm not interested in any more dates, but if he doesn't and asks for a date 3 anyway, i'll just say something like "thank you i'm flattered you're a good guy but i dont think i'm the girl for you".
and i wouldnt have an issue setting him up with someone i know who's single and who he might be suited for.0 -
You men can't win. That is the answer to every thread.
I know I probably irritate folks here by doing this but a thought.
If that statement had said women instead of men I would be saying to myself that I don`t want that so what do I need to do different so it isn`t true.
I would hate to think that my behaviors in a relationship led to a situation where a lady was often frustrated and left feeling disrespected and outside of the partnership.
Are most women really comfortable with this as far as a relationship goes?
I just meant that every woman wants something different and/or has different expectations. 0 -
You should kiss on the first date.
Doesn't have to be full blown make out clothes ripping off sessions, but at least something.
if each is interested that is.
To each his own... I wouldn't initiate a kiss on the first date, unless it's an old friend (possibly someone I knew while married). If I like the guy, and he initiataes I'm not saying I'd turn him down but I'd really want to get to know someone before we start swapping spit.
I'm not saying you should be the one to initiate it.
I'm just saying, a kiss isn't taboo. It's apart of chemistry. If it's there, it's there. If it's not, it's not.0 -
It's a shame that there are douche bags like that and I can't stand being put in the same basket, considering myself to be a genuine all round good guy.
One person's all-round-good guy is another person's bad date story.
As an example, I have a friend who is the ultimate gentleman, to the point where he always stands when a woman approaches or leaves the table. I find it extremely annoying since our dinner groups boast 6-7 women each time and most of us know half the town so we're always getting up to say hi to someone. He spends half the meal standing. My friends find it gentlemanly and endearing. I find it annoying.
And, no, I'm not just saying this because you're asking in another thread if a woman you meet in the near future would be upset that you're already planning a trip with a hot girl 3-4 months from now. I wouldn't fault a guy for that (but I wouln't be exclusive with him either), but many girls I know would consider that douchy behavior.
I don't think there are any right or wrong answers here, just what works for your life.
Hmmm, respect is annoying to you.
You're a tough one to figure out.0
