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What Day Is It?
National Hug Your Boss Day. Then try to explain it to your HR person as you are being fired for improper touching. Eat a Hoagie Day. Did you ever wonder what's really in that back room in a Subway? You've never seen them actually bring anything out, have you? Live Creative Day. Throw something together in the kitchen made…
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What Day Is It?
International Chocolate Day. Without chocolate, there would be no Reese's, no Easter Bunnies, almond would be sad, a nameless city in Pennsylvania, and s'mores would be s'lesses. Kids Take Over the Kitchen Day. Are you a truly good and brave parent enough to eat what they make? Positive Thinking Day. When you are down and…
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What Day Is It?
National Chocolate Milkshake Day. Free chocolate milkshake at every White Castle west of the Mississippi! N/A in Las Vegas due to gaming laws. National Day of Encouragement. You can do this. Fall seven times, stand up eight but watch your step this time. Keep up the good work at $5 an hour. It’s okay to make mistakes,…
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What Day Is It?
National Ants On A Log Day. Put peanut butter on celery and top that with raisins. Of course, that would resemble a big chunk of tree with tiny little insects crawling all over it. Who the hell named that? National Hot Cross Bun Day. They don't set your mouth on fire. Nor are they shaped like a cross, but they are buns. So…
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What Day Is It?
This week is: Line Dance Week. I have enough trouble walking a straight line and you want me to do what? National Drive Electric Week. If you drive a Prius, that's nice. I admire your commitment to the planet. Just stay out of the left two lanes and get the hell out of my way. Direct Support Professional Recognition Week.…
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What Day Is It?
National Salami Day. If it's dark, hard, and greasy it might be salami... or a mechanic. Bring Your Manners to Work Day. This is one day of 261. Leave your belches and farts in the car today. National Lazy Mom’s Day. This is what we call a misnomer 99.9% of the time. National Threatened Species Day. Today we commemorate…
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What Day Is It?
National Coffee Ice Cream Day. Diabolical. It makes you fat and keeps you up to wonder why you keep gaining weight while you go back to the freezer to finish that gallon. Great Egg Toss Day. Sign the petition to bring egg tossing back to Guinness... or just check your spouses's reflexes with a quick toss. Read a Book Day.…
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What Day Is It?
Be Late for Something Day. Did you buy all six of yesterday's Powerball Lotto numbers today? Did you get to the gate as your plane started moving? Was it overdue last week? Are late fees a part of your bill? Celebrate! National Cheese Pizza Day. If there is anything more vanilla than vanilla, it's cheese pizza. National…
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What Day Is It?
Another Look Unlimited Day. Before you throw out that item you haven't worn for a year because it doesn't fit anymore, give it another look. It's only that 10 pounds away from fitting you. National Macadamia Nut Day. The bacon of nuts. Newspaper Carrier Day. In this age of Tech everything, do they toss tablets and I-pads…
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What Day Is It?
This is All American Breakfast Month. French Toast, English Muffins, Danishes, and Quiches are Un-American! Bourbon Heritage Month. If this is your American breakfast of choice, you might be a Red Neck. Shameless Self Promotion Month. Three words: Donald John Trump Happy Cat Month. Why? It's impossible to tell. They don't…
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What Day Is It?
Eat Outside Day. When is the last time you picnicked in a pristine pasture on a gingham tablecloth with the one you love...or your spouse? And were you able to explain the grass stains to your spouse? Love Litigating Lawyers Day. The only thing do-able about this is the clever use of alliteration. National Diatomaceous…
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What Day Is It?
National Holistic Pet Day. If your pet cockroach isn't under the care of Dr Weil, it will die today. National Toasted Marshmallow Day. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. Every year my toaster is toast before the first pair of marshmallows is done. Thoughtful Thursday. I'm not sure why it's the last Thursday of August. Let…
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What Day Is it?
According to Hoyle Day. How do we know he was right? Maybe a knight should move in a straight line. Maybe backgammon was just a joke he made up to decorate that back of a checkers board. National Chop Suey Day. What the hell is a suey and why can't it be served whole? Lemon Juice Day. Drunk straight up, it will exercise…
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What Day Is It?
This is: Minimally Invasive Surgery Week. OK, who's up for a needless laparoscopic lumpless lumpectomy? Be Kind To Humankind Week. This is like a vacation spot, all-inclusive, and like a vacation, one day is already gone. See, you can do this! Or not. National Championship Chuckwagon Race Week. https://youtu.be/TTx_fwP1-pw…
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What Day Is It?
National Waffle Day Having trouble deciding to buy that new car or just washing the old one or buying a new one? Save your money and just wash the old one, or buy a new one. National Peach Pie Day I wouldn't recommend this for pie in the face day. It gets too sticky. Can Opener Day 48 years after food was put into cans,…
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What Day Is It?
National Sponge Cake Day. Who decided to name a cake after uncle Harold living in your basement? Buttered Corn Day. This always gets my socks greasy. National Hug Your Sweetheart Day. There may be an underlying problem with your relationship if you are needy enough to require a specific day. Internaut Day. The reason you…
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What Day Is It?
National Pecan Torte Day. It would take 11,624 pecans, stacked end to end, to reach the top of the Empire State Building or 1745 Pecan Tortes side by side. You won't find that one in Trivial Pursuit. Poet's Day. "Piss off early, tomorrow's Saturday" Thank you, Limies. Brazilian Blowout Day. This day is HUGE at your…
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What Day Is It?
This week is National Safe at Home Week. All home plate umpires will wear Trojans. National Chef's Appreciation Week. https://youtu.be/Z9VLwV48OHs 20202020203202020 Today is World Mosquito Day. We must stop the brutal murder of the Aedes albopictus before they become another extinct memory. National Bacon Lover's Day. Why…
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What Day Is It?
Meaning of "Is" Day. Try to define "is", but you are not allowed to use "is" in your answer. Go. National Men's Grooming Day. OK, guys. If you have a beard, it is not acceptable to emulate Gabby Hayes and showering at least once today is required. National I Love My Feet Day. Everyone, get a mani-pedi today, guys included.…
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What Day Is It?
National Rum Day. Rum is made from molasses. Molasses is made from sugar cane. Sugar cane is a grass. Therefore, when you drink rum you are doing landscaping. Mow your lawn. National Bratwurst Day. This is the holy of holies in Wisconsin. Remove your shoes before approaching the state border and bow your head as that…
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What Day Is it?
National Failures Day. It was a tight race, but James Brien Comey Jr. was edged out by Omarose Onee Manigault-Newman. Chauvin Day. Without him, male chauvinist pigs would have never existed. I Love Cowboys and Cowgirls Day. They uinderstand what it means to never kick a fresh turd on a hot day. National Relaxation Day. The…
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What Day Is It?
National Epsicle Day. You didn't know that's what Frank named that delicious summertime treat 113 years ago, did you? International Nagging Day. Celebrating women and men who have honed nagging into an ego-destroying art. National Wiffle Ball Day. Wiffle ballth make a withling noithe, when you hit them. International Rose'…
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What Day Is It?
Friday the 13th falls on a Monday this month. This week is: Safe + Sound Week. Don't forget to wear your earbud condoms and never, ever re-use one. Weird Contest Week. Dwarf Tossing has been moved from the main ballroom to the basement barroom. National Resurrect Romance Week. Sorry, it's too late now. Just give me the ice…
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What Day Is It?
National Duran Duran Appreciation Day. If you are really, really into '80s music. National Lazy Day. Whoever started this day was too lazy raise his/her hand to take credit, but this is my kind of Friday. National S'mores Day. After a nice healthy day of hiking or fishing, let's build a campfire and eat calorie bombs.…
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What Day Is It?
National Book Lovers Day. Books; Soon to go the way of Borders and Waldenbooks. National Rice Pudding Day. Am I the only one who thinks of cooked maggots? National Veep Day. For all the Trump hating Liberals, remember who ascends if he goes. National Hand Holding Day. If everyone were to show solidarity around the world by…
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What Day Is It?
Universal & International Infinity Day. That would be 8 8, and who decided 8 is the symbol for infinity? I think 0 is being disrespected. Sneak Some Zucchini Onto Your Neighbor's Porch Night. You grew too much of another fruit that thinks it's a vegetable again, didn't you? Happiness Happens Day. The people of North Korea…
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What Day is It?
Particularly Preposterous Packaging Day. Opening oversize objects often occupies our own offbeat offerings. National Sea Serpent Day. Sea Serpents scuttle skiffs. Professional Speakers Day. We listen intently. We promise to put use their self-improvement skills now. We go home and promise to start tomorrow. National Night…
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What Day Is It?
This week is: National Bargain Hunting Week. Do Walmart people look up to or down on KMart shoppers? National Psychic Week. If you didn't celebrate this week last week you are just one of the rest of us. Exercise with your Child Week. Now that my children are in their 40's bench, pressing them is no longer possible. Stop…
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What Day Is It?
National Grab Some Nuts Day. Insert your own joke. I don't want to get banned. National Watermelon Day. Seedless watermelon is for sissies who can't spit. Tomboy Tools Day. Sexist sockets. Airplane Crop Duster Day. Organic crop duster pilots spray non-gmo, gluten free, chemical free, pesticide free pesticides from all…
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What Day Is It?
National Ice Cream Sandwich Day. OK, you ketchup weirdos, like Bryce Massengale, you would , wouldn't you? National IPA Day. Any summer day that ends in y is a good day for several refreshing IPA's. National Coloring Book Day. Keeps the kids busy or the adults sane. Take a Penny, Leave a Penny Day. The only thing more…