The New Water Cooler
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Quiet weekend. Caleb took off Saturday. It seemed like he was a bit sad as he was leaving. Which really makes me crazy. Every time I wanted to do something with him he was busy, gone or not interested. I hate that his departure makes/made me feel like he was also disappointed in his break. I thought he was doing what he wanted by not doing stuff with me. Gah. Now I am back to being completely on edge about both of the boys. Zach with his back to horrible school status (barely passing and lying) and Caleb acting more on the depressed/low side. Me feeling like a failure for not providing them with the tools they need to be the successes I know they can be.
I have obviously let my praying knees get lazy.
Here's to another week.0 -
Don't beat yourself up about the boys. It's hard as a Mom to see they are hurting or not applying themselves, but they are at the point where they have to problem solve for themselves and take control of their lives and futures. Of course, with support from you and Bernie if needed but they can't fly on their own if they don't set the course and do what needs to be done.
I wonder if C doesn't like UNL and isn't happy there? Or is college harder and he isn't getting the grades he was use to in high school and is struggling with that? Boys don't open up easily. Will they talk to Bernie as their Dad? Does he encourage them to tell them what is going on with them?
I just made hotel reservations at our stopping points going south. We will stay south of Cincinnati the first night in KY, and then outside Macon, GA the second night. That gives us a 4 hour drive on the 3rd day so we can take our time in the morning and arrive around lunch or shortly after. We can't get in to our rental home until 4pm so either hang at Jeff's house or leave later in morning.
My brother who lives in AZ will be in FL at the same time. He is going to come see us from 2/13-2/15 and stay with us. Rory and Hannah will have left on the morning of the 13th.
Well I need to tackle some packing and laundry folding.
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And because even though I have been tracking - must have been lying to myself about my portion sizes I am up over two pounds. Boo. I am hopeful most of it is water retention - as I have been hitting the popcorn hard, but I know it is partially true as my pants and bra were really tight yesterday. Boo. Get it together Marla.
For Caleb it is (I think) that his classes were definitely harder than he anticipated - even with 'doing everything right' he still struggled big time. He has always had the smarts and the tenacity to make great grades. UNL has lots of people leading these first years of physics and calc that really have no business being teachers. Caleb may finally be seeing now how we talked and talked about how they will sort - these people have no care about helping you be successful and stay in the program. There are thousands there and enough will make it that they just sit back and let Darwin decide. How many kids go to other schools for physics and calc because you can't move on until you get those classes. Caleb's other big thing remains not having a girlfriend. Even though (just like living off campus) I tell him that will come, you have years to be in a relationship. That's a big stumbling block for him. Of course he doesn't do the sorts of things that would interact him with the available females (clubs, games, concerts) instead spending his spare time with his buddies (who have girlfriends) - sigh. I also come from the experience that I did feel that way too and then 'settled' for Bernie who was super interested in a relationship, but maybe I should have stayed focused on just being in the experience of doing college and meeting lots of people. But of course, what do I know.
Big snow looking to come in tomorrow. Unfortunately it is supposed to be my hair day. We'll see how it shakes out.0 -
I stayed with the same guy through under grad and grad school, then married him. The signs were there that we were too young and maybe not suppose to get married to one another. We both ignored those signs and settled for one another. I got David and Jeff from that marriage but that is the only positive about it. I should also have enjoyed college and made good friends, had fun in large groups. Oh well...I wouldn't have met Russ if Don and I hadn't married and moved to MN. I would never have ended up in MN on my own. Then I wouldn't have Rory either. It was all meant to be the way it happened and I'm happy with Russ.
C will figure it out. If he is going to live with his buddies maybe one of their girl friends has a friend he could meet?
I went to aqua fit this morning and then went to the grocery to get ingredients I needed to make Russ' birthday cake. I'm making him a small Black Forest Cake (4 layers). It is a serving for two so we will eat it and enjoy without having more pieces to tempt us. It is from The Pioneer Woman on Food Network.
We are suppose to get snow Thursday. I hope the weekend isn't bad weather and I hope I can get to the Y for my last two classes before we leave for FL.
I put some toys and kids' books in a tote to take down for our rental when the kids come over. I'm hoping Jeff and Karah will let me leave most of them for the kids when we leave. I may slip some a few small books (light weight) in my suitcase for Halen when I go to Mexico.
I am up and down on my weight as usual. I had lost 5.4 lbs but was up this morning about 1.5 due to whatever. I am not strict about measuring. I usually eye my servings. Maybe I need to be more accurate with it. I am determined to lose even if it is slow. Hopefully the outdoor activities in FL will help me. Keep plugging away in NE too. You can do it. We just need to look at it as a process with good and bad days. Life needs to be lived and we need to be kinder to ourselves.
Charlie got his sutures out but has to wear the cone for two more days (today and tomorrow) due to wanting to lick when it itches. He is moping around.
Have a nice evening!
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the snow is moving in. I-80 is closed from Kearney to Wyoming already. Getting a rather large amount showing in the forecast (some models showing 13 inches). Yikes, we'll see. Leaving shortly for my hair appointment which got bumped up in time. I came in at 5 and got plenty done. Though I still hope it's ok to return, because it feels like tomorrow is iffy.
I am keeping after staying in the right mindset for attempting to stay on track. It's always going to be up and down. It just certainly is bummer to see it go that much. Today showed a decent amount back off, not everything, but no longer three up. And, yes I weigh everyday. It's just information.
Awww Charlie, you're almost there buddy.
Zach finally texted me back after I had asked how his first days of classes went and mentioned he is coming home this weekend. That is making me anxious. He never comes home so soon after the semester starts and the weather is not going to great. I want to ask why he is coming home, but don't want to make it seem like he isn't welcome. Sigh.
Hump day.0 -
I wonder if Z has something to tell you or just needs to be home and cared for?
Kudos to losing the pounds. I try not to weigh every day unless I feel I may have lost because I don't want to get discouraged. It doesn't motivate me if the scale goes up. I feel like a failure when it happens. I need to get control of my mind set/attitude.
I took my 3 plants to my sisters so she can care for them while I am gone. If they die, I won't be heart broken. I vacuumed out my car and wiped down the inside. I like a clean interior when we travel. The outside is dirty but can't be helped until we get south away from salt and snow. It was snowing here around noon but nothing stuck. Tomorrow is suppose to be bad weather so we'll see if they are right.
I didn't go to class this morning. I was dragging when I got out of bed and I just wanted to get the car and plants taken care of. Now I am going to start making decisions on what goes in the suitcase. I really shouldn't over pack since we can do laundry. Hard not to take too much.
Rory texted and asked if we will be home on Sunday to talk. I don't know if he just wants to chat or has something to tell us? He calls so rarely, doesn't respond to texts or vmails much either. Hannah, girlfriend, keeps me informed as to what they are doing and how he is.
Well, time to make clothing decisions. Stay safe with the weather!0 -
Maybe a furthering of his relationship with Hannah?0
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I was wondering that also. Russ told me that Rory said he would talk to us before we left for FL so he thinks he is just doing that. If there was an announcement, they would tell us in person in FL in a few weeks when they visit.
Well I didn't make it to class yesterday due to my own fatigue. Today is bad roads and school closings so I'm opting out of class again. I'm suppose to drive to Traverse City this evening to volunteer at the National Writer's Series with Power Books. If still slick roads I will see if I can get out of it. I don't want to risk an accident. There are some old people driving around here that shouldn't be on the roads. Or the opposite, people that go way too fast for conditions. I sound like an old bitty!
I have my clothes narrowed down and will put in suitcase today. I will add underwear after my last wash load on the weekend. I need to pack my hotel bag too. We always pack a small bag each to take in to hotels when we stop so we don't have to lug the big suitcase.
How is your weather?0 -
Fortunately we did not get the full 14 inches forecasted, but probably a good 7. So it is still very slick. I made Bernie drive me to work since he doesn't mind driving on it and it makes me anxious. I regularly get zoomed by on these roads.
Zach still acts like he is coming home even though the roads are bad (and he doesn't like driving either) - so that is also making me anxious. Why the big deal to come home when he normally wouldn't come until Spring Break. Meh.
Hopefully they clear up quick.
Isn't today freedom day for the pup?0 -
Yes, Charlie is cone and bandage free. He licks his paw once in awhile but it is ok to do so now.
We are getting the snow now. I canceled going to the city tonight to volunteer for Power Books. Roads are slippery per report on the news. I don't want to deal with it.
I had to laugh. My oldest sister texted me earlier telling me not to drive in to the city tonight with this bad weather. Is she my mother? I know she cares but I had to laugh because she is just like my Mom was.
I will be going into residual weekly points today. I had two multi grain blueberry waffles for breakfast, raw veggies, yogurt based hummus and some tuna salad for lunch. Russ is baking chicken, buttered noodles and broccoli for dinner. The noodles will have points but chicken and broccoli will be zero points. I may squeak by. I am going to take my scale with me to FL so I can continue to weigh in on my own scale. I don't know if Karah has a scale but I don't want to go to her bathroom, strip down before breakfast and weigh in. Seems too weird and intrusive. I've never taken a scale on vacation with me, LOL!
I hope Z makes it home ok. I wonder why he feels the need to come home so soon. I hope he is ok. I wonder if he wants to talk to you and Bernie about something without C around?0 -
No weight loss this week. I need to change it up and be more accurate and strict with what I eat initially. Too many noodles and waffles...
Feeling the time crunch to get ready for FL. On top of that, my DIL in AK keeps texting me links for places to stay our first and last night in Cabo. We have the wedding resort for 3 nights starting the 19th and we plan to head back to Cabo area the last full day, 29th, and stay in proximity to the airport. Decision is cost, hotel vs rental... I am leary of a few she has sent me due to cleanliness, location, etc. So we will see...
Z coming home today?0 -
I used some of my weeklies yesterday, I was having an extra hungry day and couldn't make it lunch so broke out one of bars. I'm still up this week by a good bit and think I must be way over-estimating my nightly popcorn. I'm going to have to break down and get a measuring cup out and scoop out my six cups I allow myself.
The roads are still not great. The drive home last night was really sketchy. Bernie wasn't up to drive me in today, so it was an anxious morning doing the drive myself. Hopefully better this afternoon.
My sister had her scope yesterday. It sounds like it mostly went ok - she was obviously worried the weather would cancel it. And to me is sounds like whoever did her IV did something really wrong. Michele said that it not only hurt when they poked, but that she was in pain the whole time it was in. Like sharp pain. Then when it got taken out she said it was horrible pain (wrong, wrong, wrong - that shouldn't hurt) and it bled so bad they had her hold her arms over her head? And last night the area was warm and hard as a rock. SOUNDS SO WRONG. I told her she has to tell her doctor. That whole thing she said sounds wrong.
Oh, and Caleb forgot his pillows at home, so someone needs to make a trip to Lincoln too.
We'll see how all this potential running shakes out.0 -
Are you doing WW's too? I may have missed that. I actually have forgotten to eat today due to being busy with packing, yoga, laundry and talking to my sister. We are going to the local tavern for an early dinner. Fish, veggie pasta alfredo, quesadilla or salad sounds good.
Yoga felt good but the Y was busy today. The hot tub was full and very noisy and it is next to the pool where my classes are. It was hard to hear the teacher, focus on stretches and directing the mind inward like you are suppose to do in yoga.
Did Z make it home? I missed what is going on with your sister. A scope for what? I had an IV like that once. Same pain and lots of bruising where needle entered. They put it in on the top of my hand which I do not prefer. I won't let them do that again. I prefer my arm.
I am 3/4's done on packing. Tomorrow I will do my last load of laundry, last cleaning, etc. My sister wants to come over for a bit so that will take some of my time away. Russ' bday is Sunday so I will make his cake tomorrow or Sunday depending on time.
Can't wait to take off for the sunshine.
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Michele just had her colonoscopy.
The road’s still weren’t great so Zach stayed in Wayne. Caleb forgot his pillow and enough contacts so one of us needs to run those to Lincoln. I’m probably not doing another road trip with Bernie after the last disaster. He’s just doing his pretending everything is fine and won’t even apologize for his part. Somehow I have to get through to him.
Glad it’s Saturday. Going fast though.0 -
Bernie sounds like a conflict avoider and master of denial. Russ is definitely the King of Denial when he is at fault. Rarely if ever admits he is wrong. Rarely apologizes for his snappy comments or when he is a jerk in an argument. Always someone else's fault.
I'm glad Z stayed put since the roads were bad. You don't need to worry until he is home safely. How did your sister's colonoscopy turn out? Was it for routine, based on age or does she have issues?
Who will drive to Lincoln?
We ended up going out to eat with my two sisters mid day and made it our dinner. We went to this place that has great sandwiches, soup, salads and pizza. I forgot to eat again up until the meal so I had one of their Reubens. They are the best ones I've ever eaten. I also had a bowl of their butternut squash soup. They make the best soups around so I couldn't pass it up. I will have to get back to my 3 small meals and a snack tomorrow and remember to eat when I get up.
My packing is down to putting coats, shoes, and miscellaneous extras (beach towels, toiletries, etc.) into my suitcase and totes. We will pack Charlie up tomorrow eve after he eats dinner. He is watching us like a hawk. He sees the signs with suitcases, etc. and knows it means a change. He makes sure he can always see us.
I finished my jigsaw puzzle this evening. Russ kept joking that if I didn't finish, we couldn't leave. I finished and said, "now we can go to Florida!".
I will make Russ' birthday cake in the morning and we will have it as a treat tomorrow eve. It is only two servings so that will be perfect.
Have a nice Sunday!0 -
All packed and ready to roll. We will pack up Charlie in the morning.
David, AK son, called. They are coming to FL to see us! They will overlap with Rory and Hannah and then my AZ brother arrives right after Rory and Hannah leave. They will see him also. I will get to see the AK grands twice in 4 weeks!
It is Russ' 64th bday today. We went to the tavern for a mid day dinner and then I had made him a black forest cherry chocolate cake for two, 4 layers. We just each ate a piece. Very rich! We should have good driving weather tomorrow, luckily!
How was your weekend?0 -
Happy birthday to Russ. So exciting you will get to see everyone soon! Yay!
Bernie made the trip to Lincoln.
Tomorrow is the first day of the semester for Caleb. Here’s hoping for a good one.
Just hanging out watching some tv
Safe travels!!0 -
It's another Monday and I think you are on the road. Sending safe travel vibes.
Nothing to report, just slogging through another day.
Be well!0 -
We made it through our first day of travel and are at our hotel in KY. Charlie did very well in the car. We give him a motion sickness pill when we travel long distance like this. It works like a charm. Traffic wasn't too bad, weather was good with dry roads and good visibility. A win!
Tomorrow we drive another 9 hours to Macon, GA and stay in a hotel again. Knowing we have the rooms reserved, know our stopping points and aren't over doing the hours on the road really helps our dispositions.
The AK family will arrive in FL on the 8th and stay to about the 15th. I am hoping we can find a neighbor or friend that will take a family photo of all of us together. It can be casual and does not need to be color coordinated. Just a photo of us all from a phone camera. I asked Karah to think about who might be available to do it.
Well we need to find some food to bring back to our room for dinner. We don't want to leave Charlie in room by himself. He's nervous enough as it is. There is a Cracker Barrel across the parking lot and a deli across the road from our hotel.
I hope C's semester is a good one too.0 -
So glad the first leg went well. Hoping today and tomorrow go as well. I haven't been to Cracker Barrel in forever. Once upon a time I was obsessed with their pecan pancakes. Mmmmm.... why do pancakes taste so much better anywhere but home?
Here's to happy driving.0 -
It felt like a long driving day today. Going through Atlanta at rush hour was unpleasant but could have been worse. Our hotel in Macon is not very clean. I detest dog friendly rooms and hotels in the south. Different standards for mid priced hotels. I will not make the mistake of booking a hotel on the bypass again. We should have stayed on I75 and taken our chances. I thought it would be nicer off the bypass, wrong!
Jeff said we can check in any time tomorrow and he will be there to give us the code and get in. His friend/neighbor showed him the house today and gave him the code. The house is ready for us. I hope it is as nice as the pictures show it to be.
I just need to get through the night in this room. I hope I don't get bed bugs! Russ thinks I over react because I am adverse to germs, etc. He is like pig pen on Snoopy. It doesn't faze him for some reason.
Hope to arrive about noon tomorrow. We had a sunny day and the temps here in GA were up to 59. FL is warmer...0 -
Big wheels keep on turning, proud Mary keep on burnin'. rollin', rollin' on the .... or something like that ;>)
I bet you're almost there!!!
Hump day and family time - WWOOOOOTTTT!!!!!0 -
Karah, Jeff's wife, is so sweet. She is a southerner, born and raised in GA. Graduated from Georgia Tech University and worked in Atlanta when he met her. She works from home so we don't bother her during the day. Jeff rents an office in dowtown St. Augustine with the person we are renting from. He goes to work there so they both have privacy on phone calls, zoom meetings, etc. When we arrived yesterday I texted Jeff and Karah about a place Russ and I could get decent take out for last night's dinner. We hadn't been to the grocery and only had our snack foods and what we brought from our pantry (nothing for meals). She texted she was making chicken and rice burrito bowls for all of us. So we went to their house for dinner and spent time with all. Tonight she is making pizzas and salad and including us. We will have to plan a meal or two for them over here.
Russ and I went to the grocery and bought my healthy foods, some essentials, and the makings of 2-3 dinners. We need to plan for future so we don't eat out too much. This morning, Jeff brought Miles over to see us before daycare. He was able to get Miles dressed when he told him he could come see us. Otherwise, not too cooperative. Almost 2... After they left, Russ, Charlie and I took a 35 minute walk around the neighborhood. There are some really cute houses and some weird modern ones in this neighborhood. Not cookie cutter and most are older FL charm.
It rained in the night and dropped in to the low 50's today. It is sunny so I love that.
Stay warm!0 -
Beautiful cool day in the 50's. In the 40's when we woke up. Russ said his walk with Charlie was brisk. I will walk later. I had to shower and wash my hair this morning.
We are having the kids over for dinner so we need to pick up some ingredients at the grocery. I need to wipe my bike off from the road trip. It is pretty dirty. Russ said the chains look gunky from the road debris and need lubricating. I want to explore the neighborhood on my bike.
I was having my coffee and heard a soft knock on the front door. I knew it would be Miles. Jeff had him at the door and said he started crying "Baba GiGi" and needed to see us before daycare. Funny! He was by yesterday morning so I think he wants to do it every day now that he knows we are here. I have toys and books and he likes to explore them.
How are things in NE?0 -
Today was 61 and we went to the farmer's market here. Produce was gorgeous. We bought mangoes, melon (really sweet!), tangelos, strawberries (in season!), tomatoes and broccoli. I mailed off David's birthday card. He is turning 35!! So hard to believe he is that old now. He and his family will arrive on the 8th. Sounds like they can't wait to get down here to warm temps, although they make the most of the snow in AK. Jeff, Karah and kids went too.
Russ, Charlie and I took a long walk today and I can feel it. I relaxed on the deck until it got too chilly as the sun got lower. I am under a blanket on this wonderful lounger couch now.
I saw on my weather app that MI and MN have had a snow storm. Did NE get it too?0 -
It’s so cold!!!
What a wonderful first few days you have had. And Miles at the door? My heart burst! What a sweetheart.
Struggling with a migraine last night and all day. Am hoping it will resolve overnight.
Soak up all those special moments.0 -
We have had dinner with the kids and grands every night we've been here. They have hosted 3x's and we have hosted twice. I hope they don't think they have to have us over every day. Russ grilled shish kabob tonight and we all ate together. Tomorrow they work and go to daycare. We may drive south on A1A to Flagler Beach and walk on the beach, relax, etc. There is a dog friendly beach there. The sand is cinnamon colored and the beaches are very clean. Big rocks to sit on and watch the waves.
MN friends arrive Tuesday or Wed and may spend the night on their way south to the condo they rent. I think the snow has been heavy in MN so hope they can get out when they choose. We were so lucky we got out of MI in the nick of time!
Charlie is adjusting but doesn't like us out of his sight. If one of us leaves the house, he waits at the front door which is all window and watches for our return. Such a welcome when we walk in! He is doing well with the kids. He actually went out and greeted Miles when he arrived tonight. He gave him a sniff. Normally he steers clear of Miles.
I put my bathing suit top on with my shorts today (tankini top) and got some sun on the deck. I need to build up my color for Mexico. I have a good start. Tomorrow will be 81 so that will feel warm.
I don't get migraines but had a couple of coworker friends that did. It was debilitating and they would miss work or need to go home if it came on at work. Is that what it is like for you?0 -
Sometimes they are so bad I have to throw up (or wish I could) and go to bed. Fortunately that doesn’t happen super often. Usually I can just chug a bunch of advil or excedrin and power through.
Still bitter cold today. Hopefully warmer tomorrow.
Tomorrow is my cardiologist appointment.0 -
Good luck with the appt. I hope the news is good and nothing of great significance. But I also hope you get a satisfactory answer and how to manage it.
82 and sunny today. I feel so lucky we were able to come down here for an extended time. Today Russ and I went down to the beach and walked, then ate lunch at a beach side bar. We are going to Jeff and Karah's for dinner again. I told them they did not need to feed us every night but Jeff said they are cooking because that's what they do and including us. It is up to us to say we won't be joining them if we choose not to. So nice of them. I am bringing the left over salad from last night that we ate with the shishkabob.
Some MN friends may arrive and stay with us tomorrow eve for one night on their way south. I hope they do. They are on their way down here but don't know how many miles they will accomplish each day. Waiting to here...
After the beach and lunch, I sat in the shade on the deck reading all afternoon and also talked to my sister on the phone.
There are different pollens down here that are high right now. Russ is congested and my eyes water a lot.
Stay warm and I hope you feel better.0 -
I'm really nervous about this appointment. This brings up a lot of emotions from a pretty challenging time of my life. Being quite young and always being worried that my heart was going to 'act up' (go into tachycardia). Then being worried about how freaked out my mom would get. I often tried to hide the episodes from my mom (until I couldn't anymore) because her emotions were so unstable about it. So, yeah there is also quite a bit of resentment that she couldn't be strong when I was going through this. As a parent I totally get being freaked out when anything is wrong or potentially wrong with your kid, but your job as a parent is to be strong for them and save that freak out for later. I always felt like I had to be strong for her even though I was a kid and the one having the medical issue. And don't ask about my dad, he was never around - always at the farm - so yeah resentment there too. Anyway, bringing up all those emotions, plus how being that way always held me back because I didn't want to do anything that could cause an episode. The procedure (the radio-frequency ablation) was experimental at the time (standard now) so that was terrifying, and it took me a long time to recover from (side effects) but it was such a relief after. I felt so free. Having to consider going back - all the appointments, worrying about episodes, taking multiples meds trying to find one that works without too many side effects, etc. It's a lot. On top of not really having anyone to really share it with. I refuse to even talk about it with my folks because it will become the same, having to be strong for them. My sister would understand, but she would insist that my folks know. So, no. And Bernie is just not really interested in getting into difficult things. sigh. This too shall pass. Hopefully.
Get some Vitamin D for me.
Hugs0
