Trying to Concieve
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Anyone here ttc baby #2? My son is a little over 2 and I'm really feeling like now is the time to start trying for baby number 2. My husband agreed at first but now is freaking out at the thought that I could pregnant fast after stopping the pill, even though I try to remind him it took us over 6 months trying before we fell pregnant with my son.
We both work full time and my son goes to day care. We're hoping he can get in the preK program at the elementary school but there's a chance they could fill all the spots as 4 year olds get first priority. Which means, we'd have 2 in day care and that's my husband's biggest hang up. Now he wants us to wait another year but I just don't want my kids 4 years apart. My husband is also hung up on his age and I think if we wait or if it takes us a long time to get pregnant the 2nd time around he will think he's too old and my son will be an only child ugh. I've been planning for this to be my last pack of birth control pills for a while. I started prenatal and vitamins again for the last two months or so. And he knows I don't want to be on the pill any more. It hinders my weight loss and makes me feel bloated ugh!
Am I crazy for wanting another child even knowing we may have to pay day care for 2 at one time? Any advice from you ttc-ers?0 -
@tyedyechick0930 we are trying for our first, and the only advice I really feel qualified to give is that only you and your husband can know when the time is right. He might come around to the idea if you bring it up again to him. My husband will sometimes push back on ideas and then soften by the time I remind him of his previous position. Obviously it takes two to tango, though, and 4 years apart wouldn't be the worst thing. Would you technically be able to afford childcare for the two or would it make life exceedingly difficult? Have you already considered taking time off from your career, or your husband's taking time off from his, and ruled that out as a childcare option? In a lot of cases it seems like this ultimately saves money, as in the cost of daycare is greater than the income of one spouse or the other. There are definitely multiple ways to approach childcare and no two families are the same.
Just a note about the pill, I don't intend to ever go back on it after this. I feel like after this process of trying to get pregnant I'll be well-equipped to know how to avoid getting pregnant without chemical interference. So I'd say even if you aren't going to try right away, stopping hormonal birth control doesn't mean you'll get pregnant if your timing is right for prevention. And prenatal vitamins are good for us all2 -
hi friends. im back to ttc. i lost the baby on friday at 10 weeks along. found out thurday that baby stopped growing at six weeks.. im up a few pounds and a bit emotional. hi again
i want to get through and get ready to do it again0 -
Oh, so sorry to hear that @krizaten33. I hope you are doing okay. Thanks for coming back to join us.0
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Oh, @krizaten33, I'm so sorry for your loss! We're here for you when you need us. Hugs to you!0
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@krizaten33 Sorry for your loss. Hope this round gets a lot easier for you!
@pezhed I'm with you there on never going back on the pill. Now that I know how my cycle really works, the pill seems to offer me little benefit with a lot of nasty side effects.
@tyedyechick0930 That's a tough decision. I hope you guys work it out. I'm gonna try to have mine close together. But so far, still working on #1.
@daneejela Hi! I like your avatar. Also, I don't think it's weird to be disappointed or arrogant to hope for good things so soon. But, I do think it takes longer than most web sites say for birth control to work its way out of one's system. I've been off it 4 months and only now am starting to look normal. I also keep telling myself not to stress...and stressing anyway, haha. But everyone here has been super patient and supportive and encouraging.
Ok, so this has been a stressful month for me with work--had to fire a disgruntled employee. Two more employees left (kids returning to school.) Now training some newbies. I fell off the exercise wagon, but going back to the gym tomorrow. Had a house party tonight, and some friends brought their newborn over. Every time my husband holds a baby, he tears up. It's hard to watch. I'd so love to get pregnant this cycle so I don't have to see him cry! I should be in the fertile window according to the calendar, but OPKs are negative, and I'm almost out of them.
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@Alioth you mentioning your husband tears up when he holds a baby melts my heart! Not going to lie, watching my husband hold or play with our baby is a huge turn on haha. It's why women have more than one baby, I'm convinced. Too bad sex still hurts hahah oh man.
Eta: sex cuz it's a turn on, not because I want a second baby NOW. That's too close. Close is good but I don't need Irish twins lol.0 -
Krizaten33 I am so so sorry to hear you lost your baby. Take care of yourself, we are here for you.0
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@Alioth that sounds terrible at work! And sooo cute about your husband, though I'd feel kinda weird if my husband did that over someone else's kid, haha.
@VeryKatie your clarification cracked me up.
I'm 9DPO and losing my mind. Thank god I will be in the woods for 11 DPO-14 DPO (how sad I think of time this way now) and won't have any way to test. I MAY take one tomorrow when I wake up but I know it's a bad idea. I've found the Trying for a Baby subreddit and have been all over it. Vacation can't come soon enough.0 -
@Pezhed I'm at 10 dpo and about to go batty. I tested this morning with a Wondofo and it was a BFN. I feel like I go from thinking we've got a shot and feeling good about chances to thinking there is no way in heck numerous times a day.
As I was getting ready for work this morning I felt like one of my bbs was itchy...turns out it was a piece of hay in my bra..symptom spotting is a b*tch. LOL
My BBT dropped to the coverline this morning, but don't feel like AF is about to start early so hopefully temps rebound tomorrow. Of course you can find chatter about "implantation dips" but I'm trying not to read into that kind of thing too much, 10 dpo seems on the late side for that. *shrug* AF is due Monday, so not many more days left to wonder.0 -
@SheilAnneSmith so glad we're in the same boat! I'm having imaginary symptoms and googling "implantation dips" over here, too, but mostly just hoping that my temp tomorrow is higher than today's. The hay in your bra is so funny, ahah. Hang in there for the next 3 days!1
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so sorry for your loss @krizaten33 please take care of yourself.0
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Sorry have been seriously awol! Just crazy work and sick for a few weeks with a flu-type virus...anyway no real excuses but it has been so lovely reading back over your posts from the past month - lots happening!
@krizaten33 so sorry for you loss, absolutely heartbreaking. Look after yourself x0 -
Amanda, I'm in the tfab subreddit too. I've been silent this week, but I'm usually active there. I have a different username though. It's such a good community, I've learned a ton three-phase where I learned everything about temping.0
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@krizaten33 I am sorry for your loss..
Yesterday I have been at the gynecologist after a really long period of time. I'll be talking some progesterone pills for the next 5 days to start my periods.
I felt totally different yesterday though. After weeks of strong desire for pregnancy, yesterday I felt like a totally different person, doubting it all again from the beginning. Is it good decision, is it right timing, are we gonna be good parents? We used to fight a lot in the past, last 2,3 years we build our relationship as much more calm and friendly toward each other. But when we do fight, it still sounds really bad, although we usually resolve it within a day or two. Are we gonna be able to set up a safe home environment? Will we know how to resolve our conflicts in a mature way? I am doubting everything.
Did you ever have moments like this?
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@VeryKatie You may be on to something there!
@pezhed Welll...you know I'd prolly just sneak some tests into my gear...haha...Have a great time in the woods. Might be good to take a break from the TTC insanity.
@1fit_mamma Hope you're feeling better soon!
@SheilAnneSmith Pffft. Hay. Fingers crossed for you anyway!
@daneejela If you're feeling a lot of confusion and stress, talking it out with a counselor might be a good idea. (I've done it.) But I think everyone has rough days where they question their life's direction.
Welp, today I did something silly. I took vitamins with breakfast and :sick: all over the backyard. Should have known better. Haha. Good news is, I finally got a positive OPK, even later than last time. Got a couple steaks and gonna have a little date night.
Maybe go to the art museum's new show or board game night at the coffee shop. What I've learned from tracking the past few months is suggesting that I have both a short cycle and short luteal phase. A lot of ladies online with short cycles have an earlier ovulation, but this has not been the case for me. Still, it's too soon to worry until I've tracked a lot more cycles. 0 -
Looks like I'm out. We are thinking we'll try one more cycle here and if we aren't successful we'll take 2-3 cycles break from such involved TTC efforts so I can focus on losing some more weight and to get some pretty strenuous fall projects done, like stacking 15 tons of hay that's in 100 pound bales. Not something I want to do pregnant, but getting pregnant might have made a good excuse to hire some high school boys to come in and do it for us.0
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Sorry youre out this month, Sheila.
I am not stopping ttc for any reason at this point (unless it would damage the baby like xrays.) this has already taken so much longer than I thought it would, and this month Im taking out all the stops. Going to bd every other day starting as soon as my period stops (any time now, ugh--day 6!) and I bought preseed for this time around! I have no idea how much longer this is going to take, and I want to make sure I give it my best go every cycle.
Ive stopped looking up my new estimated due date at the start of each cycle, stopped being so optimistic. I have an appointment with a midwife to discuss next steps and fertility testing (that my feelings flop about.....I feel silly for scheduling it, then desperate to talk to her) My niece starts kindergarten in a few weeks and Im going in late so I can see her off on her first busride...because Im afraid we'll never have a baby of our own to put on the bus for the first time.
Ugh. Rainy Tuesday, sorry to bring everyone down...this is our month, yah!!!! Baby dust to everyone!!!
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Was hoping to come back to some good news here, sorry last cycle wasn't anyone's. My AF showed on Thursday night, only 9DPO and right before camping/hostelling, so a bummer in multiple ways. Seriously wondering if I have low progesterone but haven't done much googling yet. Anyway it's only been two cycles of trying so I'm not going to worry too much. Want to track a couple more cycles before I stress. I'm going to go ahead and make some dietary adjustments, though, to see if I can regulate my cycle somehow. My last cycle was 39 days, and this past one was 25. This body is hard to work with.0
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I wish I had good news to share, Amanda! I saw your picture post, looks awesome and like you had an awesome time Sorry to hear you also got your period. What kind of diet adjustments will you be doing? 0
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