Thoughts, Epiphanies, Insights, & Quotables
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Here's a link that was meaningful to me, it was originally posted on one of The Movie Chair's blogs:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-HFFSYcEMCI
It's a success story of a foster dog.2 -
My epiphany was yesterday and it was about my mindset and priorities. I've gone from "I don't have time to exercise" to "how will I fit exercise in my day?" We had parent/teacher interviews from 3-7pm and I'd forgotten (yep, 'nother story) and was talking with a colleague about how I was going to hit my steps target. We wondered what parents would think if instead of a 10 minute timeslot they had a "2-lap of the cricket pitch slot". Mrs C needs to hit 12,000 steps so walk and talk. Ha ha that's taking staff well-being to a whole new level.2
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maiomaio71 wrote: »My epiphany was yesterday and it was about my mindset and priorities. I've gone from "I don't have time to exercise" to "how will I fit exercise in my day?"
THIS!
It was only a couple of months ago that this very thought crossed my mind. One of my first thoughts each morning is to ask myself what deliberate activity will I do today. My only tweak is that I don't call it "exercise" per se, I call it my activity, as in "go play, have fun, activity".
My car now carries my gym bag and equipment - so I can be flexible in getting in some fun. Always my walking shoes and workout pants / top. Tennis racquet and balls. Swim stuff. Golf stuff. I am excited that my lifestyle has evolved to be an active assortment of fun activities. I am challenged to be learning new things, like golf.
P.S. I grew up watching my dad play cricket each Sunday afternoon at the Hollywood Bowl fields. Go get that 2-lap cricket pitch slot done!
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Nothing tastes as good as slim feels..........heard this at weight watchers years ago!4
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Focus on what you can do.
I was talking with a woman recently who is going through a really rough period of life. She wants to lose weight but she has all of these learned requirements of what it takes to lose. She is focused on what she believes she MUST do instead of what she CAN do. Maybe she is not at a place where even a daily deficit is a good idea. Maybe a small deficit a few days a week is all she can handle at the moment. Sure it would take her a long time to see results but does that really matter? As long as there is nothing life threatening happening medically any progress is good progress. Later her life will hopefully even back out and she can handle a more traditional weight loss method.3 -
Today is 9/11.
I was surprised to think that since 2001 there is an entire generation of people that have been born and did not experience the events of that time.
Consider taking a moment to reflect on this day, 18 years ago.
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Having weight is hard, losing weight is hard, choose your hard.
I have seen this one float around MFP. Not sure who to credit it to. I think this one really helps when your 'normal' begins to improve and you start getting hooked on the progress. I don't know about other people but because I had been large for a long time I kind of molded my life around it the best way I could. It was when I traveled that I could not help but be reminded how bad off I was. Even sitting in a hotel chair smacked me in the face with my own fat. It is SO hard to be that big. Now that my normal has changed and things like sitting in a booth is possible it is much easier to pick the hard of losing weight. I hope I never forget it.
It comes from the James O. Hill, one of the researchers in charge of the National Weight Control Registry. The NWCR takes people who have lost at least 30 pounds, kept it off for at least one year, and studies what their habits are to see what makes for successful long term weight loss.1 -
Sitting down to eat is one of the things the Beck solution gets you to do. Day three I think it is. I thought "I always sit down to eat". Anyway, the challenge for the week was to sit down every time you ate something so that you were conscious of everything that passed your lips. Preparing dinner every night....I sat on the kitchen floor a fair few times! My son thought I was totally mad when he caught me. But it was quite an eye opener to see how many small tastes of things I was taking. I don't think the calories would have been much, I ended up guesstimating about 100 (I was literally tasting for seasoning or nibbling a carrot) but it is a very interesting way of noticing how often we mindlessly put stuff away. Think I may have burned a few calories sitting down and getting up again too. 😂😂
ETA: I know this isn't the purpose of the 'sit down to eat' part of the cbt but I did it to see how often I was eating standing up, given that my immediate reaction was that I didn't eat standing up. How wrong I was. I guess my belaboured point is that the reality of our behavior is very different from our perception.4 -
magnusthenerd wrote: »Having weight is hard, losing weight is hard, choose your hard.
I have seen this one float around MFP. Not sure who to credit it to. I think this one really helps when your 'normal' begins to improve and you start getting hooked on the progress. I don't know about other people but because I had been large for a long time I kind of molded my life around it the best way I could. It was when I traveled that I could not help but be reminded how bad off I was. Even sitting in a hotel chair smacked me in the face with my own fat. It is SO hard to be that big. Now that my normal has changed and things like sitting in a booth is possible it is much easier to pick the hard of losing weight. I hope I never forget it.
It comes from the James O. Hill, one of the researchers in charge of the National Weight Control Registry. The NWCR takes people who have lost at least 30 pounds, kept it off for at least one year, and studies what their habits are to see what makes for successful long term weight loss.
@magnusthenerd
I have heard him say it but I was not aware it was original to him. Thanks.0 -
MY FAVORITE QUOTES
“Live in a beautiful state.”
“If you want to be happy, be.”
“Fail forward, quickly and often.”
“I can have it, but I don’t want it.”
“Don’t correct people when it matters little.”
“Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.”
“I am done harming myself with food forever more.”
“Change your thoughts and you change your world.”
“It doesn’t come natural until it’s practiced unnaturally.”
“My choices either get me closer to or farther from my goals.”
“When a craving doesn’t come from hunger, eating will never satisfy it.”
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
“See yourself living in abundance and you will attract it. It always works, it works every time, with every person”
“Commitment is the willingness to be uncomfortable and overcome obstacles or options that stand between you and your goals.”4 -
On days you are feeling weak remember that you are braver than you may realize.
Applying it to weight loss...
It takes a great deal of courage to lose weight and especially as a larger loser. I don't like to speak for everyone. Maybe it is not true for each and every person but I think it is true of many people... none more than those that have failed many times trying to do it. You are marching into all your fears of failure and the unknown and you are trying to change your fate. Each day you get up and you have to trust that what you are doing is enough. Over time that gets easier as you settle into a routine and you see consistent results but getting to a goal weight and staying there is so abstract.
This is hitting home with this surgery coming up. My body composition will change dramatically and I have to trust it will be an improvement but I can't really see the other side of it. I have to keep marching towards it. Sure the surgery is a big event but I have been doing that very thing for a year and a half. Marching towards an outcome that I can barely imagine. I have hopes of what it will be but the reality of it remains unclear.
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I especially need to hold this close to heart as things sloooooooow down for me and it starts to feel impossible (had some troubles this week; working on mental feels rn) to reach my goal despite progress forward... but slow progress can feel like no progress!4 -
[Objectively] Why?
Why am I hungry right now?
Why am I not hungry?
Why am I craving a hamburger?
Why am I eating and not hungry?
Why did this day go so well?
Last night I hit the kitchen again at 11pm. I wasn't hungry but I wanted to eat something. I am not in a deficit at the moment so it is fine but afterwards I was a little annoyed because I ate a hodge podge of nonsense calories that added up to 500 that I would then have to deduct from today.
Casting the annoyance to the side because I need to be objective why did I eat those calories?
So for me the answer is simple. I am engaged in a little rebel eating from being so tightly wound for 3 months. I need to be a little immature and as long as I do it in a controlled fashion I will let me get away with it. But that was 2 nights in a row and I am done with it now. It will not happen tonight. This is only acceptable very rarely in short runs. Getting it out of my system is fine. Becoming a habit that I have to break is not.
I have spent a lot of time with myself over the years but somehow I still had blind spots that contributed to my weight gain and my many failed attempts to lose it. I need to know what motivates me, my strengths, my weaknesses, and my habits so that I can manage myself without always trying to beat myself into submission. So I started asking myself why all the time. Sometimes the answer is obvious like last night. Sometimes I have to watch a good or bad outcome for some time to figure it out. It is extremely important though to ask why on the good days because it can sometimes help cast a light on the bad days.
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...and that why is exactly the reason this time you're/we're/everyone is winning. Not asking why is allowing the self destruction to take over. When I'm having tough days I think back to some days 7 months ago when I wouldn't even have noticed I was over eating, never mind be aware of it and then wanting to address it. It's so much easier to be blinkered from reality than to deal with it head on.
The mind battle has been the hardest part of all of this for me so far. I am winning!4 -
Consciously deciding to eat is way better than just compulsive overeating. Asking “why” is a great way to start recognizing what is occurring. Sometimes the answer isn’t apparent, but asking the question opens up your mind to the opportunity to answer it.
Our Desires to overeat typically come from the habit brain. Asking yourself powerful questions engages the higher thinking part of your brain, and helps you recognize this and make conscious decisions, not habit decisions. This also helps delay the reaction to your habit thoughts.
Maybe when you recognize your mind is wanting to eat when your not hungry, you can just sit and think about those thoughts and don’t act on them for say 10 minutes.
Maybe you can identify another more productive option in line with your goals, and even develop a list of contingency plans for situations such as these and others.
Maybe you can start writing down your thoughts, questions and answers in a journal. What do you want to eat? Why do you want to eat it? How will you feel after eating it?
Using your higher thinking brain to make a conscious choices to eat something you don’t need is a huge improvement over eating out of a habit. Your choosing to and that’s ok. “I know I’m not hungry, but I choose it anyway, and I know it takes me farther from my goals, but I will make this decision now.”
“When a craving doesn’t come from hunger, eating will never satisfy it.”2 -
So many of us eat to fill some known or unknown void in our lives....we think food is our best friend!4
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conniewilkins56 wrote: »So many of us eat to fill some known or unknown void in our lives....we think food is our best friend!
I have been guilty in the past of "some is good so more is better" mentality. This happens particularly around holidays. Food can be a great addition to a holiday. You sit around a table with people you hopefully or at least mostly care about and have a grand feast. Nothing wrong with that. The problem I had was trying to make the holidays even more "special" by having copious amount of treats and treat food for all the days surrounding too. Sometimes, and far too often, this mentality extended to just celebrating a weekend.
The sad thing is I do not like eating that much food. I never have. I would be willing to bet that almost every January I lost some weight because I was so sick of food by the time Christmas and New Year was done. I eventually did learn that when I went someplace like Disneyworld that I did not want to eat a lot of heavy meals because of all the walking. Be nice if I could have learned that lesson sooner for all the rest of the time I did it.4 -
I am not eating healthy. I am eating a healthy number of calories.
Losing weight is healthy all by itself. I don't need to try and segregate food into categories of "good", "bad", "healthy", "unhealthy", "junk", etc. At most I need to call some food "treat" food which for me means that it is something I need to moderate. In the past there have been a few things I struggled to moderate and I considered them personally dangerous. That didn't make them bad just bad for me at that moment. One of them was beef jerky which a lot of people consider "healthy" eating.
Anyway a discussion in the main MFP forum reminded me of this and it comes up especially when someone is offering you food. If I do not want to eat a doughnut because of the calories I should not besmirch the food choices other people are making by calling it unhealthy. I can eat it. I have eaten them and lost weight which has gotten me healthier. However if I am offered it and I do not want or cannot make it fit in my calorie budget I just refuse it. I don't call it unhealthy or call unnecessary attention to the calories because of this:
What I choose to do should not make others feel bad.
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So yesteday a friend and I took a three hour road trip to shop. While I didn't stay within my calories I had several small victories. Road Trips usually involve bags of candy and several cherry cokes. This time, it was 1 diet soda and 1 bag of chips (not the best but I'm counting it as an improvement) AND at lunch I looked at the menu, decided on the entree then conciously and added fruit and veggies around it. It wasn't about calories it was about what is good for me. yay!5
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Fighting your Fate
I was stopped by a neighbor this morning that I had not yet met yet. He has obviously been watching me (might be creepy) walking and noticing my weight loss. He wanted to know the how. When I gave him my, now greatly rehearsed, spill that summarizes to eat less and move more he started talking about his back surgeries, and how large amounts of vegetables (it came up) didn't agree with him. He mentioned his diabetes and that it was hereditary and that he wasn't even sure that losing weight would help because he knew skinny people with diabetes.
I left the encounter wondering if he heard my answer and then re-accepted his fate. I don't know for sure and I am not going to read more into it than what was there. I do my best not to judge others.
I accepted my own fate too often though. I was sure I would die and I would joke that my pall bearer would be a piece of industrial equipment. I was also sure my genetics had doomed me. The only way I could lose weight would be to eat like a rabbit and I could never sustain it.
I know there are times when one needs to accept their fate but how often do we accept it when there are ways of fighting it?
I am glad I have been fighting and winning lately. Even if I bought myself no extra time my fate of how I am able to spend the minutes, hours, days, and hopefully much more in front of me has changed dramatically.7 -
Best quote on losing weight that I have heard for a while......”Do not reward yourself with food, you are not a dog!”6
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@conniewilkins56, while in theory I agree, do not reward yourself with food, in practice I dont know. I guess it depends on what terminology you use. Planning for a much anticipated higher calorie meal or treat can be a strong motivational tool for myself. I think @NovusDies probably said something similar to that before also. I didnt get to be 400 pounds because I hated food. If I dont plan some of those treats in, and accept the occasional blip, I will struggle keeping forward momentum. I am working to stifle all of my bad urges and others keep popping up.
Along those lines I contemplated/stressed a little thinking/daydreaming about Thanksgiving today at work. How am I gonna fit that, or limit that day? I haven't had a dinner roll or mashed potatoes and gravy in it seems like forever. Anyone else developed a plan for Thanksgiving yet? I would love some ideas or suggestions.2 -
The quote was kind of a joke !....so many people say when they lose ten pounds they will eat a candy bar type thing...I was actually thinking of our dog because she is SO bad but if you say “TREAT” she immediately perks her ears up and comes running!....I don’t think there is anything wrong with rewarding yourself with a slice of cake at a celebration or banking some calories for a special event...I was visualizing a person trying to lose weight and if someone says “TREAT” we perk right up and come running....I do lol....I love to eat....that is why I am overweight!
Anyway....
Thanksgiving....I have been planning our family’s meal in my head for days....thankfully I am the primary cook and I will be tweaking a lot of the dishes...making them a little lighter and healthier....I am not going to make massive dishes of anything so I have less yummy leftovers to deal with....I am using Heinz gravy in the jar...25 calories in 1/4 cup.... cranberries cooked in Splenda and orange juice.....Bob Evans pre made mashed potatoes 150 calories 1/2 cup....green beans, not green bean casserole....sweet potatoe casserole with half the butter and sugar I usually put in it....turkey.....a roll and a slice of pumpkin pie....I don’t stuff the turkey so there won’t be a lot of grease in it....adding sliced almonds and dried cranberries and chicken broth instead of butter......
You are invited to dinner if you are in my neighborhood!3 -
@conniewilkins56 that sounds amazing. We usually go to my parents for Thanksgiving and my mom cooks Sunday dinners big enough for a wedding party. Thanksgiving is usually way over the top. I bought her a food scale, for me to use while at her house for dinner lol. My basic preliminary plan is to try and hang out with the veggies, not the pies so much. I will spend a couple days leading up to it at lower calories.2
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For Thanksgiving, I plan to eat everything I love. I will not count calories. However, when I feel full, I am done!2
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'You Cannot Outrun A Bad Diet'
No matter how much you are able to exercise (cardio and/or strength training) your overall health will be dependent on your food choices.4 -
FitByFifty1970 wrote: »'You Cannot Outrun A Bad Diet'
No matter how much you are able to exercise (cardio and/or strength training) your overall health will be dependent on your food choices.
Yep.1 -
Thriving is a trend, not a personality type.
Ran across this quote this morning, not sure who to give credit to but as I read it I wanted to share it.2 -
Quotable- read this in Churchill’s memoir. Doubt that it’s original with him- Perfect is the enemy of the good.
Insight from a virtual friend on another weight loss board- it’s just about trying to learn to live with some reasonable limits. And life has all kinds of limits that we take for granted. Just eat within some limits.3
