Thanks Mollie!!

I'm new and just reading over this thread. You all are doing such amazing jobs!!! Keep it up!! I'm here for any of you when you need me. Friend me if you'd like. I can relate so much to the wondering if these feelings will last forever. Are we ever "cured"?

helenld1, good job stopping mid-binge! That is very hard to do!

katemarcus, Welcome! I sent a friend request. I don’t know if we can get cured but we can be recovered? A recovering binge eater maybe?

rincoglionita, So great you saw progress!! I added you too as a friend. I need all the BE supporters I can get.

My therapy appointment was exhausting. Telling the doctor of my weight history and times I lost weight how I feel about food, When I binge etc. It was so much to explain. I told him when I binge I could gain weight and it might take a long time for it to come off. It feels like my body is fighting me. He agreed that it probably is. He is an expert on eating disorders and he said we will discuss set points and body fluctuations. My body seems to want to be heavier. He asked the what the smallest I was as an adult and I realized it was 185 pounds. WOW that was a shocker because my goal weight is 165 now. I also have anxiety and he agreed that the anxiety may be part of the problem. I will see him next week and get started with more therapy. The first visit is kind of like an introduction so he can get to know me. I think this might work out. I plan to go weekly for a little while and maybe every other week eventually.

In the meantime I may think about changing my anxiety medicine and possibly seeing an endocrinologist to see if my hormones are all in check. I also have some medical conditions that could cause those to go out of whack.

That sounds like an excellent first session, Karen. It IS exhausting to chronicle such a complicated history--good for you!

I've decided/chosen that I will go over my calorie goal today. I will log everything, and I will choose and eat mindfully, but as this is my parents' last day here and we are going to one of my favorite restaurants tonight, I will be less anxious if I know that I am not constrained to 1650 calories today. As long as I choose with awareness and log it all, I feel good about this decision.

Tsikkz, I think your observation about the "bingeing voice" and the "giving up voice" is really interesting. I'm going to think about that for a while. Thanks for sharing that.

Just thought I'd share this small nsv. Today was the first day I had off from work during the week that I did not binge eat through the cupboard! I planned and logged all of my food, cleaned the house and even did a 30 min - 2 mi Walk Away The Pounds session.

It helped me to know that we were going to Olive Garden for supper - the yummy, salty, fattening, calming food eventually would be eaten. But even then, I planned what I would eat and didn't go all 3000 cals!

I did find myself prowling the house a few times today, opening the cupboard and fridge. But, I didn't do it. It's a start!

Hope everyone is doing well!

Hello! My name is Rachel, I was here previously as 'rabetts', but I felt I needed to restart. I guess looking forward feels better without past failures haunting me. It's good to be back, feel free to add me as a friend.

@MadDogManor - Congrats on having a productive & healthy day!

I had some binge impulses in the morning. I ate a lot of food before it was even noon and past the point of fullness. Fortunately I managed to calm myself down and convince myself the day was not ruined... I ate light snacks at 2-3 hour intervals over the rest of the day (it's already night in my timezone) and managed to come in just under calories.

Question... right now, my calories are set high to maintenance/very slow loss since my main goal is just to stop binging. I usually come in at or just under calories. However, seeing that high number is a bit depressing; I do want to lose some weight and I know I can't really do it with such a high intake. This leads to a spiral of disordered thinking of - well, maybe I should just try to water fast for a week - am I really capable of that? - what if I fail and start binging again, etc. Does anyone have advice to counter that kind of thinking? I fear it will trigger more binging.

Wow, where did everybody go??? It's cool. I just went back and re-read the whole thread and am feeling better

Ugly two days of binging. I even made my diary private today because I wasn't going to log it all unless I did...I think that might be a bad sign. I just feel like making myself tell everyone everything I ate is sort of like rubbing my face in it and I have been punished enough today There is an element of wanting to hurt myself in my eating anyway.

So, I really don't have anything particularly inspiring to say. Just checking in with the ones who understand:flowerforyou:

Hi guys, just checking in. I binged the last couple of days and also skimped on exercise. Didn't log. I finally managed to get some activity in today and reign in my eating. Sadly I think calorie counting is not doing me any favors. It just makes me focus too much on eating, when I just really need to be distracted by other things. My main goal now is to have three square meals a day with a snack or two in between, regardless of calories. That way at least I'll have a shot at putting a stop to constant binging / snacking behaviors. Maybe I'll start paying attention to calories when I've nailed down some basic eating habits.

I'm going away for a week and probably won't be able to access MFP, but I wish everyone the best of luck for the upcoming days.

freertobe, we all have to do what works for us. If calorie counting makes it harder then you should skip it. I wish you luck


Chibea, I also tend to binge if I do not count calories! It is awful and frustrating.


I have had a bad week! I am sick and I just stopped caring. I was so frustrated that the prior week I ate so well but I gained weight (some due to water weight I am sure) I will try to exercise today and get going again. I am starting tracking my calories and will work hard to lose again. I am frustrated and confused what to do. I tried higher calories but that tends to make me want even more food. I just cannot figure things out!

I had a success today. It is that time of month coming up and my worst binges always happen here, in the 5-7 days before. I have the whole gamut of anger, anxiety, irritability, sore boobs and bloating and my OCD is diabolical. I sort of overate before bed as I stayed up too late and got stressed by noisy neighbours coming in at 3am and throwing heavy things on the floor above me.

Today, I got up and headed out for the gym, knowing I would stop off and get some chocolate rice cakes from the health food store which is on the way. Instead I got the rice cakes, a bag of white chocolate pretzels, a seed bar and some roasted chickpeas and ate the lot while standing around in a catalogue store next to the gym, lol. I had already felt tired and maybe should have used better judgement and stayed in and relaxed, but I feel 2 rest days a week is the most I should have so I dragged myself out.

After I had eaten all those sweet foods, my mind led me down the usual path... Might as well go to the coffee shop across the road, have a sandwich and cake and a cappuccino to top it off, purge, then go home. I already felt tired, my legs felt stiff from the weight circuits, elliptical and walking the day before and I just felt like going all out and having what I wanted.

I don't know how, but I somehow managed to battle the less healthy urges, and pull myself up the stairs to the gym. It really was a pretty immense battle, even at the entry pods, I found myself hesitating and considering turning back and going to have my cake. Even in the changing room, I felt so lethargic that I was considering going back out. I felt I would never be able to complete a workout. I certainly thought I would have to go on the bikes instead of doing the HIIT running I had planned on as my belly was full.

But I went to the treadmill, got on, and did 30 minutes of high intensity interval training (16km/hr at sprints and 6.6-10km/hr on the rest bits) followed by a further 10 minutes steady state running at 12km/hr.

I still might end up over calories a bit, but the workout killed all cravings, killed my hunger and was surely a bit healthier than eating more sugar then purging.

Great success story, Graelwyn!! I'm reading this, contemplating getting on the treadmill, have not wanted to exercise today at all. I had planned on getting outside into the garden, but instead had to shuttle the kids between a science fair and college today. Spent most of the day in the car.

Even tho none of my plans have worked out today, I'll still try to get on that treadmill

Great idea, I always feel better afterwards, even if the starting is hard, and tell myself even some is better than none in terms of exercise. Even if I just walked at an incline, it is still beneficial.

Hi ! I'm new to this website. Lost 90 pounds over the course of the past 4 year, but have gained back 20 since last summer. Could use some encouragement to get back on track. I need to get back to journaling about food and exercise and emotions.
Thanks

Bonnie

Generally, we know what it is we need to do for ourselves. You've taken the first steps by realizing what it is and asking for support.

Hi Diane!
It's so good to see you writing on here. We all have so much in common that I get a lot of support from this discussion page.
I am so impressed with your weight loss. You may be struggling now, but you have been doing great for a long time! I am just a few months in here, and I am already struggling a lot, so here I am looking for inspiration again
I look forward to getting to know you better!