Username: Bowens1973
CW: 229.0

Yesterday ended up being a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. We had an officer shot and killed on a traffic stop. This officer was a friend of mine because he was a very good friend of my husband's. I ended up leaving work early to support my husband. We met up with other friends to commiserate together for a while. After that, my husband wanted to get some liquor before heading home. He didn't want to drink alone, so I had a couple beers and a couple shots where we toasted to our fallen friend. Then, neither of us had the energy to cook, so we ordered pizzas.

This self-sabotage/rebellion felt more like survival. I'm mostly back on track today (mostly because I allowed myself a half pump, grande, chestnut praline latte) and don't regret any of my decisions yesterday. We did drink, but I wasn't looking for comfort from the alcohol. In fact, I dumped out the rest of the liquor this morning.

I am still shaken by this, but incredibly grateful to have this group so that I can share and have the accountability to stay on track with my goals despite the other horrible things happening around me.

@sugagirl5 welcome welcome!!

@MaddawgMadsen so sorry to hear about your terrible Wednesday. And so sorry for your husband. Sending hugs.

Today clearly got away from me. Have to move my workout. I briefly logged off work and thought I could swing into dinner and a workout. I caught up with some friends over the phone. But then got pulled back into work until 9:30 and had a super late dinner. Have to shower and hit the hay now. Weigh in tomorrow and not sure where I will fall. Doesn't feel like a "loss"-type week after the holiday.

I quickly tried on my snowpants tonight - didn't go so great. They are a size 18. I have some size 20 pants in the mail right now because my size 22s for work are getting way too baggy. So that's improvement but I have work to do if I don't want to have to shop before hitting the slopes in January (assuming there is good snowfall by then - in Maine and northern NH, probably will be). Night all.

we have a slight update to my post. I was ready to call it a day. then I remembered the football game was on. as it turns out, 2 of my fantasy players were absolutely killing it and it gave me so much energy + a desire to stay up anyways, that I ended up doing my workout! wooooooo! okay actual goodnight this time.

also @Gidgitgoescrzy we will take a proxy cheer for the Packers from a Ravens fan!! anything to pile on the chiefs

Happy Friday everyone!

@MaddawgMadsen I was so sorry to hear about the death of your friend. Sending prayers

CW: 276.2

Almost back to my pre-thanksgiving weight.. I don't think the dec challenge starts yet, but wanted to get a starting weight in there..

Thanks for the welcomes from everyone!

I will be the first to answer my own question.

The weight I am trying to lose now is because of the negative attitude and subsequent bad habits I developed to deal with an injury 10 years ago. in 2010, I started running as a way to lose weight, get in shape, and give myself a goal - the first was to complete a half marathon. By September of 2013, I had run over a dozen half marathons, several smaller races, five or six relay races, and two marathons. I also played soccer multiple days/week. In September 2013, I hyper extended my hip during warm up for a soccer game. It hurt, but I played through the pain for the entire game because my team would have forfeited since I was the only female that showed up. I also didn't have insurance at the time (between jobs and very poor), so I didn't have my hip really looked at for a few years.

This one injury ended both my long distance running and soccer careers. I was angry and in pain. I wasn't willing to try other exercises like walking or swimming because I didn't like them. So, to ease the pain, I found myself at the bar with my friends a lot. This was not the right way to deal with an injury!

Since the time I started with this group (July of this year, I think), I have sprained an ankle, had other shoulder issues, some lingering back pain from a minor car accident last year, and now this shoulder pain. I have been frustrated and annoyed, in pain too, but not as angry. I also have the gift of hindsight and know I never want to be where I was. I need to keep moving forward. So, this time I am being more diligent about my diet, careful with my drinking, and determined to exercise around my injury.

Friday Weigh-In
PW: 261.3
CW: 261.0

Definitely want to kick it up the next two weeks with good meals and steady movement so I can hit the holidays in stride. would like to be in the next decade before the new year.

@MaddawgMadsen ugh, such a good question, and sorry to hear about your arm! this is not your week. you're getting hits in a lot of ways.

I would say I go through phases with my injury - tendonitis in the foot. I recently told my therapist that watching so much football this season has inspired some jealously of the players - yes, jealousy of professional athletes - because they can jump around and run and move so athletically. I cannot do a jump squat. I cannot run. I have to be so careful not to overdo things or risk setting back whatever healing has occurred. So one thing that did help was making steps to recovery part of my health goals, like; I wasn't really committed to icing and elevating and now it is one of the boxes I try to check for my daily habits. I can't say I will burn as many calories as I did pre-injury because I simply can't do plyometric movements, but I can still feel like I am getting "health points" and making some progress by taking these non-movement actions. I also ditched my fitness tracker/fitbit because that was only going to make me feel worse. I also changed my mindset about workouts. I absolutely have to modify a lot of movements, including pushups and planks and the like, because it isn't good to be on my toe with weight along the foot that way.

Patience is key and I do run out of it some days. Walking is so key for my mental health and as I've mentioned in posts, I can definitely over-do it because I just want to keep moving and jamming to my songs, so that took a toll for almost a year. I also occasionally just google or search reddit for things about my injury and hear from other people who have been through it, get some new ideas. that's where I got the lacing my shoelaces differently idea.

Reading through your injuries - do you have any interest in biking? It's low-impact for your ankle, no real strain on your shoulder except for holding the handlebars. Have to make sure the seat and bars are adjusted so as not to bother your back. My sister has had some terrible low back issues for a year and she likes to stationary bike. I personally love to bike on the road or trails when I can - my bike is just not in Boston at the moment. You get the wind in your hair a lot easier than walking or running

I have one more workout for the week and it looks like quite an effort - see how the rest of my workday goes.