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Do you remember this....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyfcOriVKBM Watch it for a little bit. It's not MJ. I showed it to my kids the other day and they thought it was a hoot.
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LOL
An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend. The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring. The old man said, 'No, I'd like to see something more special.' At…
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Monistary
Okay this guy enters the monistary and is told he is not allowed to speak all year long. Then at the end of the year he is allowed to say only 2 years. The first year goes by, and the head monk says, "well it's the end of the year. You're allowed to say 2 words. What do you have to say?" The man replies "Food sucks". The…
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Worst Mall Foods
America's Worst Mall Foods! Posted Wed, Dec 17, 2008, 3:28 pm PST 90% of users found this article helpful. Post a Comment View All 2 Comments It’s that time of year again, when you’re logging more hours than ever at the mall. Blame stress, blame shopping fatigue, or blame the irresistible smell of food-court treats…
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Kids say the darnest things
1) NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!' 2) OPINIONS On the first day of…
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Remembering the 80's
Okay I thought this was cute. It does have pictures and I will work on getting them on here You Know You (or your kids) Grew Up In the 80's IF: 1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word SIKE. 2. You can sing the rap to the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and can do theCarlton 3. You know that 'WOAH' comes from Joey on Blossom…
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Watch this
commercial. It's so funny. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBsYO0ZAfKE
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Sick leave
Sick Leave I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I knew the Boss would not allow meto take leave.I thought that maybe if I acted 'Crazy' then he would tell me to take afewdays off.So I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny noises.My co-worker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing.I told her that I was…
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Bad Joke Friday
Let's hear you worst jokes. On a hot summer day, a redneck came into town with his dog. He tied the dog under the shade of a tree and went into the bar for a cold beer. About 20 minutes later a policeman came into the bar and asked who owned the dog tied under the tree. The redneck said that it was his. The policeman said,…
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My water hating friends
Let's do the same as last week, and challenge each other to drink that water. This is not for you people that drink tons everyday. This is for those of us that struggle to get three glasses. Let's up it today. Let's go for 48 oz. That's only 3 16 oz bottles. Here we go:drinker:
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Ready for Valentines day?
KY was sending out e-mails to make sure I was ready. I'm not quite sure why the whole ad didn't copy, but here's part of it. Now I'll catch you guys later cause I'm heading to ky.com to get some romantic tips.:smokin:
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Three wise Women
Okay I thought this was cute. I hope it shows up. And hope it don't offend anybody, it's just meant to be cute.
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It should be against the Law...
for businesses to have candy dishes with free candy in them. This morning I went to the Law Office and had a Fun size Milky Way, Phone company and had a chewy christmas tree mint, Post office (and these are my new favorite) the peppermint Andes mints, they are white with crunched up peppermint. I swear it should be…
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Only a mom would know
Only A Mom Would Know One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old and had just recovered from an accident. Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a get-well gift and it was one of my favorite toys. Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought Daddy…
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Does this happen to you?
Forgetter Be Forgotten My forgetter's getting better, But my rememberer is broke To you that may seem funny But, to me, that is no joke For when I'm 'here' I'm wondering If I really should be 'there' And, when I try to think it through, I haven't got a prayer! Oft times I walk into a room, Say 'what am I here for?' I wrack…
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Why......
.....is it so freaking quiet around here. It's FRIDAY and HALLOWEEN. This is a video of me in my costume, already partying.
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Nine words Women use
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. (2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. (3) Nothing: This is…
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Nude beach
LITTLE BOY AT NUDE BEACH A mother and father take their 6-year old son to a nude beach in Tampa. As the boy walks along the sand, he notices that many of the women have boobs bigger than his mother's, so he asked his mother why. She tells her son, 'The bigger they are, the sillier the lady is. The boy, pleased with the…
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I'm thankful for
got this as an e-mail and thought I would share I AM THANKFUL: FOR THE WIFE WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT, BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME, AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE. FOR THE HUSBAND WHO IS ON THE SOFA BEING A COUCH POTATO, BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS. FOR THE TEENAGER WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING…
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My dog had puppies
My Yorkie, Nickie, had puppies Wednesday morning. They are Shorkies, daddy is a Shih-Tzu
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Lol. For all you Catholics out there
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied, "When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip." So next Sunday he took the…
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Oldy but a goody
A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He notices the man sitting next to him is looking into a box. After a while, his curiosity gets the best of him, so he leans over and looks into the box. Inside is a miniature man playing a miniature piano. '... that's amazing, where did you get it?', he asked. His barmate…
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Twins
The other day my neighbor, who happens to be blonde, came running up to me in the driveway jumping for joy! I didn't know why she was jumping so excitedly but I thought, 'what the heck', and I starting jumping up and down along with her. She said, 'I have some really great news!' I said, 'Great. Tell me why you're so…
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Jokes
I was on a Nebraska car dealer assossiation web site and it had tons of jokes, here are a few. Two young Swedish men from up in Minnesota were looking at a Sears catalog and admiring the models. Ole says to the Sven 'Have you seen the beautiful girls in this catalog?' Sven replies, 'Yes, they are very beautiful. And look…
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lol.
just got this and thought it was cute
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Out my window
Just wanted to share. My hubby took this picture the other morning out our front door. I know it is OT, but I just thought it was a good pic, except that stupid cable.:grumble:
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I'm back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Some of you have been on here a long time and will remember me. I kind of disappeared for awhile. I switched jobs and didn't have internet at home so logging on was difficult. But now we have internet again, so you are all stuck with me again.
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Billy Bob---joke
Cletus is passing by Billy Bob's hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old green John Deere. Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left. He then hunches…
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60 years of wedded bliss
60 Years of Wedded Bliss A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her…