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  • Ali_momof2
    Ali_momof2 Posts: 478 Member
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    Ellie, I was married for 9 yrs and its rough going back on the dating scene especially with kids. Now its not only will he like me but will he like my kid, will my kid like him, how long do I wait to introduce them? It can be a mess. I was fortunate enough to find a good guy that gets along great with my kids, but I was really worried at first. I had known & worked with him for 6 yrs before we stared dating and he was 39 and had no kids and never wanted kids which should have been a deal breaker but it wasn't. He was open to me having kids (his ex wife had a son from a previous marriage) and at first he was very nervous around my youngest who was 1 at the time. Now he is a great dad, and my youngest calls him his best buddy in the world. He gets along really well with my oldest too. I still have times when I feel bad leaving the kids home with him while I go grocery shopping but its my hang up, not his. He has never tried to replace their dad, but he has stepped up to help out when dad isn't there (which is most times). I found a partner, not just a boyfriend, cause I know that he's sticking by me with whatever life throws at us.Be paitent & picky, very picky, its not only your life, but your daughter's too. There's no perfect man (ha ha aint that the truth) but there is one that can fit into your family. I don't know if this was helpful, but I understand the single parent thing, it sucks & its lonely and hard. If you ever want to chat or vent, rant or whatever feel free to message me. I've been there, done that & made that mistake too.
  • jo_marnes
    jo_marnes Posts: 1,601 Member
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    I was a single parent too. Luckily I met my husband when my eldest was one year old. We've now been together for 10 years and have 2 more kids. Sometimes being a parent just means you can identify what you really want from a partner xxx
  • dnamouse
    dnamouse Posts: 612 Member
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    Good morning all!

    I thought I'd do an experiment this morning.

    I weighed myself before hitting my garage gym. And then I weighed myself after the workout and my shower.

    I lost 300g in sweat lol

    I'd say it's getting a little warm :wink:
  • elliebellie78
    elliebellie78 Posts: 41 Member
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    thanks ladies... appreciate all the support, and nice to hear that some have met someone after divorce/kids! Obviously, dating is not always super fun, trying to navigate between two mature adults that have their own set patterns and ideas can be exasperating. Even more so when both have kids and are their own mini "family". Hard to know when to push ahead and when to run - lol :wink:
  • samntha14
    samntha14 Posts: 2,084 Member
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    Best of luck Ellie!

    Beeps, your travels are awe-inspiring.

    I stopped wearing my HRM almost immediately after starting to use it. I now estimate my lifting burn between 200-300 per workout, even though you aren't actually burning that much.

    So interesting story, I was doing my barbell complexes. I'm struggling with the cleans. One gentleman came off to offer me some tips. I still need to watch some videos to get it down, but the advice was appreciated. Glad the b*tch face wasn't working Sunday. Though I have been told I seem out of sorts lately. I feel out of sorts lately. I need an attitude adjustment.
  • snbouchard81
    snbouchard81 Posts: 128 Member
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    Ellie you are not alone. I am also a single parent. I am not currently dating. I would love to find someone, but first I have decided to focus on me and my daughter. I know I have some stuff to work out for myself before I try to meet someone. For now though, I am really loving having the time to focus on me and my daughter. I think its a good thing for both of us. Good luck to you!

    I have been thinking about a HRM, but then I hear how they are not really accurate for weight lifting and think why bother. But I do run and such too. So I don't know. And I figure until I do I will just save the money. LOL

    Today I rested. Tomorrow, I will go back to the gym. I am kind of missing it today. :smile:
  • Pudding1980
    Pudding1980 Posts: 1,264 Member
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    I disagree that they aren't that accurate for lifting. I've been using mine for over a year and, again, will lose when I still eat back about half of my exercise calories. So that means on a lifting day, I am eating about 1800 calories. It works for me :)
  • jo_marnes
    jo_marnes Posts: 1,601 Member
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    I disagree that they aren't that accurate for lifting. I've been using mine for over a year and, again, will lose when I still eat back about half of my exercise calories. So that means on a lifting day, I am eating about 1800 calories. It works for me :)

    Sure it might work for you, but it's unlikely that your burn is accurate - more that overall, your calorie intake over weeks/ days is low enough for weight loss. The inaccuracy of HRMs for strength training is well documented in research
  • lovetowrite73
    lovetowrite73 Posts: 1,244 Member
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    Good morning!

    Did 6A2 today and the negatives weren't any easier. I upped the weight on the underhand lat pulldown then realized that my rest was shorter. So...I think for 6A3, I'll not up the weight since the rest period is 30 seconds.

    Ali, I loved what you said about finding a partner. That's how I feel about mine. snb, your story is similar to mine as well. I jumped into dating entirely too early after being married for 8 years. Once I took a step back and just gave myself time to just appreciate me, that's when things got easier. Having four kids, my frame of mind was always who in the world would want to date a woman with that much "baggage"? Once I stopped thinking that way, I was able to see the forest for its trees, so to speak. :smile:

    For those of you in the U.S. and celebrate, have a wonderful Thanksgiving tomorrow. My mom is in town and doing the heavy lifting since I'm at work today. I love that woman! lol Enjoy your time with family!
  • Julieboolieaz
    Julieboolieaz Posts: 643 Member
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    Good morning!!

    You're all doing well! I appreciate each of you sharing what you're doing, where you've been, where your going and what you're learning along the way! I'm thankful for lifting lady friends like you guys!

    Just did stage 7 workout 2. I thought it was harder than 1. I'm loving this stage!! Woohoo!! Bring it on!!

    Off to clean in a bit, and bake and cook as much ahead of time as I can. A bit of decorating-table cloth etc, and then I'll rest. Dinner is here tomorrow, I like thanksgiving at my house. My mom, bro and sil and their kids, and her parents will be here. It's always a fun and delicious holiday! Then a bit of BF shopping to finish off the night. It's become a tradition with our BFFs.

    Oh, and I'll start the day with a 5k for local hungry kids and the sunshine foundation (blind children) to pre-burn some calories ;). It'll be 85 tomorrow!! So much for my cute outfit with boots and my scarf! Oh well, a pretty tank will be ok! :)
  • Pudding1980
    Pudding1980 Posts: 1,264 Member
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    jo_marnes wrote: »
    I disagree that they aren't that accurate for lifting. I've been using mine for over a year and, again, will lose when I still eat back about half of my exercise calories. So that means on a lifting day, I am eating about 1800 calories. It works for me :)

    Sure it might work for you, but it's unlikely that your burn is accurate - more that overall, your calorie intake over weeks/ days is low enough for weight loss. The inaccuracy of HRMs for strength training is well documented in research

    Could be. I like to have some idea of what I'm burning and like this method better than not tracking my HR or calories burned at all.
  • Ali_momof2
    Ali_momof2 Posts: 478 Member
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    jo_marnes wrote: »
    I disagree that they aren't that accurate for lifting. I've been using mine for over a year and, again, will lose when I still eat back about half of my exercise calories. So that means on a lifting day, I am eating about 1800 calories. It works for me :)

    Sure it might work for you, but it's unlikely that your burn is accurate - more that overall, your calorie intake over weeks/ days is low enough for weight loss. The inaccuracy of HRMs for strength training is well documented in research

    Could be. I like to have some idea of what I'm burning and like this method better than not tracking my HR or calories burned at all.

    I agree with both of you. I know the HRM debate and I mainly use it for my cardio stuff, but I like to wear when I do the new rules just for me. I know its not accurate for lifting, but we do more than straight lifting and its more of a mental thing. It movitates me to get my heart rate going.

    Julie, you Thanksgiving sounds a lot like mine (except for the running)and I am anxious to get home & start baking. I love to bake & now I have an excuse.

    Everyone in the U.S. have a great Thanksgiving, and eat lots of yummy stuff. I plan on logging nothing and my exercise will be running around stores after an early dinner :D
  • snbouchard81
    snbouchard81 Posts: 128 Member
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    As much as I love cooking, I am just as happy to go to my cousin's house and just enjoy the festivities. I am so glad there are family members that want to do all of that preparation. :smile:

    Happy Thanksgiving to all of you who celebrate. And to everyone else, I hope you have a wonderful Thursday! :smiley:

    I am doing some calisthetics during the rest week just because I don't want to get out of my gym habit--it took a long time for me to get into this habit and I don't want to lose it. Anyway, my arms are definitely feeling it now. I am typing with as little movement of my arms as possible (and for the record I had not been aware of how much I moved my arms in typing until today).

    Time for reading--except how to hold the book. Maybe a movie. :smile:
  • Pudding1980
    Pudding1980 Posts: 1,264 Member
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    Happy Thanksgiving to all of you in the US! Hope you enjoyed your dinners and families :)
  • dnamouse
    dnamouse Posts: 612 Member
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    Hope all the lovely US peeps had/are having a wonderful Thanksgiving :smile:

    Business as usual here lol

    I have a HRM somewhere... used it for a bit when I was running several times a week. Since changing to TDEE method, it's been sitting gathering dust in a box. Good thing I didn't spend much money on it lol But I use the watch part every day, the stopwatch and interval timer is very helpful.

    I have managed to talk the husband into going out for a family dinner tonight. The kids have a birthday party at a bowling alley that should finish up about 6/6.30pm and then we're going out to Grill'd for some awesome gluten-free burgers :smiley: Not worried about the kids over eating at the party - I know the food there and they can't eat most of it. Besides, once I tell them where we are going afterwards, they will save up their appetite :wink:
  • Beeps2011
    Beeps2011 Posts: 11,986 Member
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    Happy thanksgiving to American lifters!

    We are back home. Late. What is it, 2 am? 3 am? Still waiting for luggage. Have icy streets to navigate. And then up at 6 with kidlets.

    Not fun.

    I won't be lifting until monday. But I will get right back to regular schedule, for sure.

    BOOM!
  • snbouchard81
    snbouchard81 Posts: 128 Member
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    Thanksgiving was fun, but I know I ate way more than I should have or normally do. I am hoping to go to the gym tonight to make up for it. But we will see how my daughter is feeling. We did some black friday shopping this morning (not the super early stuff but more midmorning, and I think she is tired. :smile:
  • Julieboolieaz
    Julieboolieaz Posts: 643 Member
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    Had a fun, busy day yesterday! Turkey Trot 5k was fun in the morning, half my family cancelled for dinner because of stomach bug, the food was plentiful and delicious!, then all night shopping-whew! And I was so sore from weight training on Wed. and standing in line was tough! It was a fun day!

    Skipped lifting today, still sore! I'll go tomorrow. Still loving stage 7!!
  • Ali_momof2
    Ali_momof2 Posts: 478 Member
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    I believe I was on my feet for about 17 hrs straight yesterday. I got up at 5:30 and sat during dinner (which didn't seem to last long) and a few minutes after. Did shopping yesterday morning, and evening, got up early before work & got a few things and went out on my lunch at work. I think I am done except for an ipod for my son which I will buy online. I am sore tired that I'm not sure if my sore or if my body is just exhausted. And I have no energy to workout when I get home from work. I'm glad they boys are visiting their dad this weekend so I get a little break. Overall it was a good Thanksgiving, my only complaint was that it was 87 which is too hot and doesn't feel very festive.

    Julie, I'm glad you had good Thanksgivings too, hope your faily feels better. What a bad holiday to get a stomach bug on.

    Snb I dragged my oldest out with me shopping yesterday morning & he was napping by 4. I can't remember the last time he napped he's 11 lol, happy to hear your holiday was good too.
  • samntha14
    samntha14 Posts: 2,084 Member
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    Had a lovely quiet holiday here. We had a very vegetarian Thanksgiving as always, it's a great excuse to avoid other people. I cook up a tofurkey for the hubby and a bunch of sides. Carb fest but low cal. I made up for it with pie :) Today I avoided the stores, easy to do when you are broke lol, and babysat my baby cousin while his mommy did some shopping. Good days in all.