Depression and motivation.

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I'm trying for the umpteenth time to try and drop some weight but my depression sits in the middle of the room, so to speak, and makes it impossible to actually feel like doing...anything. depending on the phase of depression that I'm in, I'm either mindlessly eating everything I can get my hands on or not eating anything at all. Don't even ask me about exercise on a regular basis. That barely happens at all. So what do you do when your brain is actively sabotaging your life and efforts to try and make it better? I'd like to be smaller and fit the clothes that a good friend gifted to me before she passed away.
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Replies

  • JoenDeb1958
    JoenDeb1958 Posts: 229 Member
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    I understand you- I'm there with you.
    I have PTSD and I'm bipolar. The end of the year is a hard time for me from October til January. I absolutely hate it.
    I was doing so well when I first started my weight loss journey. So far I've lost 56 pounds. I was exercising everyday and adhering to an eating plan. But then you know life happened! Depression set in-I turn to familiar bad habits of eating carbs. I kinda gave in!
    I made the decision to wait out the holidays then get my butt back on the road to a better me.
    If you like you can friend me and we will get through this together
  • espressoshotsnheavysquats
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    i hear you. i'm here if you want to add me. i love supporting and motivating others. i have dealt with depression for 2/3 of my life and finally feel like i see a light. would love to share that with you as well.
  • Illyanka
    Illyanka Posts: 22 Member
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    I appreciate it. It's very frustrating when one's brain chemistry gets in the way of trying to make any kind of lifestyle changes. I don't even have a specific weight goal. Just want to get to a point where I can comfortably wear the shirts that were gifted to me by a dear friend who passed away.
  • goldenday
    goldenday Posts: 204 Member
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    Hey there- First of all you're not alone.
    Take it slow and be gentle with yourself.
    I'm in the midst of an bad episode- i'm just doing what I can. Nothing more nothing less.
    Running for me was a means of controlling my moods, but starting therapy and medication made a huge difference.
    When I can't don't have the energy to eat I find it easier to drink calories in the form of ready made vegetable juices, chocolate milk, yogurt drinks.

    Have you seen a doctor? Do you have a good support system at home?
  • bbell1985
    bbell1985 Posts: 4,572 Member
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    I am struggling too. I'm not diagnosed with depression but I have...issues. It's making it really hard to stick to a deficit.

    I had luck with setting up a moderate deficit, but only if I didn't go out on the weekends and really isolated myself.

    Really, I need therapy. Have you seen anyone?
  • killedbycardio
    killedbycardio Posts: 12 Member
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    When my brain is sabotaging everything i do, i usually sabotage the brain back. But sometimes it's better to wait for the phase to pass, start fresh, try and keep up the habit. some days end in calorie overload and tears, some days with sweat and endorphins. When you reach your low point, there's only one way to go - up!
  • Illyanka
    Illyanka Posts: 22 Member
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    goldenday wrote: »
    Hey there- First of all you're not alone.
    Take it slow and be gentle with yourself.
    I'm in the midst of an bad episode- i'm just doing what I can. Nothing more nothing less.
    Running for me was a means of controlling my moods, but starting therapy and medication made a huge difference.
    When I can't don't have the energy to eat I find it easier to drink calories in the form of ready made vegetable juices, chocolate milk, yogurt drinks.

    Have you seen a doctor? Do you have a good support system at home?

    I'm not seeing a doctor right now. It's a combination of not knowing if I will even have coverage next year thanks to the current political climate and being on contract w/my job. Any time off is time that's unpaid, and I am the breadwinner.
  • Illyanka
    Illyanka Posts: 22 Member
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    try2again wrote: »
    I struggle with this too. It's very hard to make good choices when we go through these periods of not caring about life. I've lost a total of 75 lbs in the last 5 years. When I'm feeling decent & able to focus, I take off a little chunk of weight. When I'm not, I just aim to maintain as much as possible. Good habits (logging, basic nutrition) have saved me when I don't have the energy for much more.

    There are a few practical things that have helped me. Omega 3s (fish oil) & B complex vitamins (of course you want to check with a doctor if you are on other meds). I was going through a really bad period this fall and realized I had been taking my fish oil sporadically at best. Got back on that and a friend recommended the B vitamins. I've been on those a little over a month & can't believe how much my head has cleared. I was looking into Sam e, which has a good track record with depression, but ended up not starting it since the others seemed to do the trick. You may want to look into it if you haven't already.

    The other big thing has been exercise. I know- it's the hardest thing to make yourself do when you're depressed. But I have a rule. If I don't feel like it, mentally or physically for some reason, I have to do 5 minutes. If I'm still not feeling it, I can quit. I've never had to quit after 5 minutes in the 1 1/2 years I've been on MFP. It pretty much always involves music. Riding the stationary bike using my favorite playlist, or doing a dvd. It always gives me a boost, even if it is just short term. In fact, I started doing the bike thing just for the sake of listening to music & getting that mental boost. In good weather, I do a lot of walking. Nature is a great mood booster. Don't always feel like doing it when I start, but never regret it afterwards.

    Motivation comes & goes whether you have depression or not. My philosophy is go for it when you're up to it, minimize the damage when you're not. We'll come out ahead in the end :)

    I do like walking when the weather is decent but winter gives me an extra kick when I'm down because I just can't get out. I am trying to do some gentle yoga in the AM but it's hit or miss for me, again dependant on my mental state.

    When we are done recovering from the holidays, I can definitely look into doing vitamins since meds are not a thing right now. I'm game for anything honestly because it has to be better then this.
  • Illyanka
    Illyanka Posts: 22 Member
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    bbell1985 wrote: »
    I am struggling too. I'm not diagnosed with depression but I have...issues. It's making it really hard to stick to a deficit.

    I had luck with setting up a moderate deficit, but only if I didn't go out on the weekends and really isolated myself.

    Really, I need therapy. Have you seen anyone?

    I haven't in a really long time. Mine is utterly untreated and complicated by grief.
  • try2again
    try2again Posts: 3,562 Member
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    Illyanka wrote: »
    try2again wrote: »
    I struggle with this too. It's very hard to make good choices when we go through these periods of not caring about life. I've lost a total of 75 lbs in the last 5 years. When I'm feeling decent & able to focus, I take off a little chunk of weight. When I'm not, I just aim to maintain as much as possible. Good habits (logging, basic nutrition) have saved me when I don't have the energy for much more.

    There are a few practical things that have helped me. Omega 3s (fish oil) & B complex vitamins (of course you want to check with a doctor if you are on other meds). I was going through a really bad period this fall and realized I had been taking my fish oil sporadically at best. Got back on that and a friend recommended the B vitamins. I've been on those a little over a month & can't believe how much my head has cleared. I was looking into Sam e, which has a good track record with depression, but ended up not starting it since the others seemed to do the trick. You may want to look into it if you haven't already.

    The other big thing has been exercise. I know- it's the hardest thing to make yourself do when you're depressed. But I have a rule. If I don't feel like it, mentally or physically for some reason, I have to do 5 minutes. If I'm still not feeling it, I can quit. I've never had to quit after 5 minutes in the 1 1/2 years I've been on MFP. It pretty much always involves music. Riding the stationary bike using my favorite playlist, or doing a dvd. It always gives me a boost, even if it is just short term. In fact, I started doing the bike thing just for the sake of listening to music & getting that mental boost. In good weather, I do a lot of walking. Nature is a great mood booster. Don't always feel like doing it when I start, but never regret it afterwards.

    Motivation comes & goes whether you have depression or not. My philosophy is go for it when you're up to it, minimize the damage when you're not. We'll come out ahead in the end :)

    I do like walking when the weather is decent but winter gives me an extra kick when I'm down because I just can't get out. I am trying to do some gentle yoga in the AM but it's hit or miss for me, again dependant on my mental state.

    When we are done recovering from the holidays, I can definitely look into doing vitamins since meds are not a thing right now. I'm game for anything honestly because it has to be better then this.

    Remember... you don't even have to exercise for weight loss. You just need a reasonable deficit (and not even every day). The exercise is critical for coping with your mood, however.
  • HippySkoppy
    HippySkoppy Posts: 725 Member
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    Illyanka wrote: »
    try2again wrote: »
    I struggle with this too. It's very hard to make good choices when we go through these periods of not caring about life. I've lost a total of 75 lbs in the last 5 years. When I'm feeling decent & able to focus, I take off a little chunk of weight. When I'm not, I just aim to maintain as much as possible. Good habits (logging, basic nutrition) have saved me when I don't have the energy for much more.

    There are a few practical things that have helped me. Omega 3s (fish oil) & B complex vitamins (of course you want to check with a doctor if you are on other meds). I was going through a really bad period this fall and realized I had been taking my fish oil sporadically at best. Got back on that and a friend recommended the B vitamins. I've been on those a little over a month & can't believe how much my head has cleared. I was looking into Sam e, which has a good track record with depression, but ended up not starting it since the others seemed to do the trick. You may want to look into it if you haven't already.

    The other big thing has been exercise. I know- it's the hardest thing to make yourself do when you're depressed. But I have a rule. If I don't feel like it, mentally or physically for some reason, I have to do 5 minutes. If I'm still not feeling it, I can quit. I've never had to quit after 5 minutes in the 1 1/2 years I've been on MFP. It pretty much always involves music. Riding the stationary bike using my favorite playlist, or doing a dvd. It always gives me a boost, even if it is just short term. In fact, I started doing the bike thing just for the sake of listening to music & getting that mental boost. In good weather, I do a lot of walking. Nature is a great mood booster. Don't always feel like doing it when I start, but never regret it afterwards.

    Motivation comes & goes whether you have depression or not. My philosophy is go for it when you're up to it, minimize the damage when you're not. We'll come out ahead in the end :)

    I do like walking when the weather is decent but winter gives me an extra kick when I'm down because I just can't get out. I am trying to do some gentle yoga in the AM but it's hit or miss for me, again dependant on my mental state.

    When we are done recovering from the holidays, I can definitely look into doing vitamins since meds are not a thing right now. I'm game for anything honestly because it has to be better then this.

    OP - I feel for you. I too have struggled with PTSD, depression and anxiety on and off for years due to a complicated and abusive past. I have only recently gone back to meds. I do think they have been helpful, sometimes it's hard to tell, as now the mental anguish is part of the physical symptoms I have from Lupus.

    What has helped me immensely too has been to break down the day and any goals I have into more manageable portions. I focus on eating right and that for me means meeting my protein and fat goals for the day and letting carbs fall where they will. I make sure to keep up the fluids, vegies and try to stay away from overdoing the coffee, this latter one is due to the fact that I have an immense amount of fatigue.

    I rarely get exercise. That bugs me but there is little I can do to change my situation at this point. Saying this though, I have been able to maintain my weight for nearly 4 years. Controlling your CI is key to weight loss. Perhaps you would feel a little less overwhelmed if you focus on logging accurately and eating well first then add in exercise as you can.

    I know actual pharmacueticals aren't on your radar ATM but I do take fish oil and I have found Magnesium supplements to be quite helpful, just a thought.

  • Illyanka
    Illyanka Posts: 22 Member
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    Illyanka wrote: »
    try2again wrote: »
    I struggle with this too. It's very hard to make good choices when we go through these periods of not caring about life. I've lost a total of 75 lbs in the last 5 years. When I'm feeling decent & able to focus, I take off a little chunk of weight. When I'm not, I just aim to maintain as much as possible. Good habits (logging, basic nutrition) have saved me when I don't have the energy for much more.

    There are a few practical things that have helped me. Omega 3s (fish oil) & B complex vitamins (of course you want to check with a doctor if you are on other meds). I was going through a really bad period this fall and realized I had been taking my fish oil sporadically at best. Got back on that and a friend recommended the B vitamins. I've been on those a little over a month & can't believe how much my head has cleared. I was looking into Sam e, which has a good track record with depression, but ended up not starting it since the others seemed to do the trick. You may want to look into it if you haven't already.

    The other big thing has been exercise. I know- it's the hardest thing to make yourself do when you're depressed. But I have a rule. If I don't feel like it, mentally or physically for some reason, I have to do 5 minutes. If I'm still not feeling it, I can quit. I've never had to quit after 5 minutes in the 1 1/2 years I've been on MFP. It pretty much always involves music. Riding the stationary bike using my favorite playlist, or doing a dvd. It always gives me a boost, even if it is just short term. In fact, I started doing the bike thing just for the sake of listening to music & getting that mental boost. In good weather, I do a lot of walking. Nature is a great mood booster. Don't always feel like doing it when I start, but never regret it afterwards.

    Motivation comes & goes whether you have depression or not. My philosophy is go for it when you're up to it, minimize the damage when you're not. We'll come out ahead in the end :)

    I do like walking when the weather is decent but winter gives me an extra kick when I'm down because I just can't get out. I am trying to do some gentle yoga in the AM but it's hit or miss for me, again dependant on my mental state.

    When we are done recovering from the holidays, I can definitely look into doing vitamins since meds are not a thing right now. I'm game for anything honestly because it has to be better then this.

    OP - I feel for you. I too have struggled with PTSD, depression and anxiety on and off for years due to a complicated and abusive past. I have only recently gone back to meds. I do think they have been helpful, sometimes it's hard to tell, as now the mental anguish is part of the physical symptoms I have from Lupus.

    What has helped me immensely too has been to break down the day and any goals I have into more manageable portions. I focus on eating right and that for me means meeting my protein and fat goals for the day and letting carbs fall where they will. I make sure to keep up the fluids, vegies and try to stay away from overdoing the coffee, this latter one is due to the fact that I have an immense amount of fatigue.

    I rarely get exercise. That bugs me but there is little I can do to change my situation at this point. Saying this though, I have been able to maintain my weight for nearly 4 years. Controlling your CI is key to weight loss. Perhaps you would feel a little less overwhelmed if you focus on logging accurately and eating well first then add in exercise as you can.

    I know actual pharmacueticals aren't on your radar ATM but I do take fish oil and I have found Magnesium supplements to be quite helpful, just a thought.

    I also have PTSD and ADHD so coffee is an essential for me since I use the caffeine to self medicate. Working on CI is doable (I think). I logged today and I was over my goal by like 1200 plus calories. Which makes me want to eat nothing tomorrow save for drinking coffee so my brain can function.

    I want to just be not fat. Why can't the rest of me get on board?
  • HippySkoppy
    HippySkoppy Posts: 725 Member
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    Actually my post reads kind of wrong in that whilst I try to limit coffee, I still find it hard due to the fatigue so I thoroughly appreciate where you are cominng from.

    Please don't reactively restrict yourself for going over your calories, look at your logging for the success it is, you can see where there is room for change and improvement, where before without this information you are flying blind.

    I understand your frustration and feelings of being conflicted. Maybe now you just aren't in the zone for losing weight, perhaps going into maintenance calories would be better for you at this point. No loss but no gain. Continue till you feel able to fully commit.

    It may too that you are aiming for too steep a deficit, look at lowering your weight loss goal so you get to eat more.

    I do wish you all the best.
  • crackpotbaby
    crackpotbaby Posts: 1,297 Member
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    I have bipolar disorder type 1; along with that a bunch of anxiety, OCD (mild) and (mostly resolved) PTSD stemming from a bunch of bad juju, homelessness and rape(s).

    ............

    Things that help my depressive symptoms (and my manic symptoms) are good nutrition, getting out in the sun even just for a cuppa on the porch, and ... yep ... regular exercise.

    I totally relate to not being able to do any exercise.

    I can't sometimes for months, and then I have to start small.

    A year and a half I couldn't get off the couch. A year ago I couldn't run to the end of the street and back. Now I can run about 4km.

    It doesn't 'fix' my mood, but now on the days I don't exercise it makes me edgy and I feel calmer after.

    ..............

    When I'm depressed and my mind is making it impossible to do anything I think, I may as well be depressed at work, or going for a jog seeing as I'm just going to be depressed laying on the floor at home.
  • CarlieDunbar
    CarlieDunbar Posts: 2 Member
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    Here for you! I've recently been diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I hate feeling like I can't get myself out of bed to do anything...and then having anxious thoughts about what will happen if I don't. It's a constant back and forth in my head and I usually end up mindlessly eating in bed when I'm in that funk. When I am feeling good, I do get a good amount of exercise (I sometimes go to the opposite extreme and then get burnt out). I like to rock climb - but lately I've felt it harder and harder to get to it and less and less excited about it. What helps me the most is when my friends and family invite me to do things or challenge me to find joy in things I like again. Hopefully we can all do that for you! Let's lift each other up :)
  • CarlieDunbar
    CarlieDunbar Posts: 2 Member
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    Also, add me if you like!
  • peaceout_aly
    peaceout_aly Posts: 2,018 Member
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    Illyanka wrote: »
    I'm trying for the umpteenth time to try and drop some weight but my depression sits in the middle of the room, so to speak, and makes it impossible to actually feel like doing...anything. depending on the phase of depression that I'm in, I'm either mindlessly eating everything I can get my hands on or not eating anything at all. Don't even ask me about exercise on a regular basis. That barely happens at all. So what do you do when your brain is actively sabotaging your life and efforts to try and make it better? I'd like to be smaller and fit the clothes that a good friend gifted to me before she passed away.

    I find that exercising helps lessen depression and OCD. To get started, it is hard, but once you are in the zone and have a routine, it becomes a sort of outlet. Instead of being sad or "in a funk" and feeling like you want to sit around all day and not see anyone, you can pop in your headphones and head to the gym to take it out on the weights.
  • LPJM1710
    LPJM1710 Posts: 14 Member
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    Twelve months ago I returned from China with a condition that mimicked Emphysema. After resting for a month I took to a serious twelve day water fast but low and behold just as research said trying to maintain the same lifestyle as when fasted was almost impossible and I eventually returned to my eating habits of before. However, I paid attention to my fitness regime. I learned about exhaustive fitness and the exhaustion that sets in when I did too much. There are still days I am like this. I thought I had to take this attitude to combat the many anxieties I suffer from symptoms of autism. The good thing was although I returned to my same weight I dropped a size on my waist. It had never been my intention to lose weight more so to get a better body definition. I also realised being of the age group I am losing fat would be sluggish in comparison to a man say half my age.

    One month ago I made a decision and used all of my will power to make it work taking sugar out of my diet and I lasted ten days. I repeated the process but included a minimal amount for social reasons and hey ho on those days I did my symptoms sabotaged my efforts. I just posted that in 2017 I am going to take a zero tolerance to sugar. Sugar is the key in my opinion to the majority if not all of the symptoms of mental health, perhaps take sugar out of ones diet could even change a person born with the symptoms I am aware more research is required in this area. However to take sugar out of your diet and if you are like me addicted to sugar cravings then you have to go on a diet that is going to maintain balance in your gut. Have a healthy gut and you will less likely be prone to mental health challenges.