Going Ape-*kitten* on another kids parent.

perdie7

I haven't gotten into it with other parents...

but my son (17 at the time) was getting harassed verbally by a boy at school, we talked about it, and he just ignored the kid. Then one day this kid pantsed my son as they were going into class, my son grabbed him around the neck, pushed him against the wall and told him if he ever did that again he would take him down. The teacher looked at the other kid and said, "payback is a bit**".. My son came home, told me what happened, I said I would back him up 100% for defending himself. The kid has never bother my son since.

jessicae1aine

I find the fake silver spoon encrusted with plastic rhinestones shoved up you @ss to be quite hilarious, too.

^ This.

sarahrbraun

When my oldest was in elementary school, a kid walked by him on the bus and pulled the glasses off his face. Multiple witnesses said that my son did nothing, and the *attack* was out of the blue. I did call the other child's mom and inform her of the situation and let her know that if it happened again, and the glasses were damaged, I would expect HER to pay the $200 to replace them. She tried to tell me that she "couldn't understand why he would do that since he wore glasses for a while too" . I was firm and stood my ground....it never happened again.

serena569

People actually behave like this? All these years I thought Jerry Springer was scripted.

srhershey

My daughter is almost 5 yrs old, and this is one topic that I've been thinking about in regards to raising my daughter. I don't ever want her to be a bully, but I want her to be able to stand up for herself. She is actually taking Taekwondo, will be graduating to a yellow stripe belt in Oct, and one of the lessons they teach is bully prevention and having a positive attitude and self esteem. My daughter has never hit, bit, or pushed another kid and I plan on keeping her that way. I do want her to grow up to be able to stand up for herself and hopefully someone who can't. I do know that if anyone bullies her, especially when I'm around, I wont hesitate to say something to the kid and/or parents. If that doesn't work, I'll have to turn into Mama Bear.

There is nothing classless than sticking up for yourself and/or family, especially your child. Just ignoring it and walking away makes things worse because now your child is viewed as being weak. I'd be unbelievably proud to see my daughter standup to bullies.

serena569

Has anyone been in a situation where your child has got into it with another kid and one of the two parties ended up at the others door or went at it at the school?

No. We have some class where I come from.

So, you are saying these situations never happen in your neighborhood. Do you live in Pleasentville?

It's a pretty safe bet this wouldn't happen in my neighborhood. Too many parents are lawyers.

Charlie003

People actually behave like this? All these years I thought Jerry Springer was scripted.

All the time. My daughter sometimes makes things up, so when she tells me things I listen very carefully. She told me one day she was getting bullied at school by 3 boys. I asked for their names. She did not know them. I asked how they were bullying her, she said they wait for her at the bathroom. I thought about it for a minute, then said, no more karate kid for you. But once she was being bullied, and before I could write a letter to the teacher, she called me to say the situation was delt with. Saw the mother at teacher parent night. My wife goes up to the mother and says, so, this is the little boy that was bulling My Daughter. The mother glares at my wife and says, that not how I heard it and stormed off. Some patrents do not accept their little angels are not perfect. I know my daughter is not perfect, so if ever there is a situation, I always keep an open mind.

rml_16

They have class where you come from?

More like you have some ignorance where you come from.

You're absolutely right. It is completely ignorant to NOT get into a physical or screaming fight as an adult with another adult. How silly of me.

Charlie003

My daughter is almost 5 yrs old, and this is one topic that I've been thinking about in regards to raising my daughter. I don't ever want her to be a bully, but I want her to be able to stand up for herself. She is actually taking Taekwondo, will be graduating to a yellow stripe belt in Oct, and one of the lessons they teach is bully prevention and having a positive attitude and self esteem. My daughter has never hit, bit, or pushed another kid and I plan on keeping her that way. I do want her to grow up to be able to stand up for herself and hopefully someone who can't. I do know that if anyone bullies her, especially when I'm around, I wont hesitate to say something to the kid and/or parents. If that doesn't work, I'll have to turn into Mama Bear.

There is nothing classless than sticking up for yourself and/or family, especially your child. Just ignoring it and walking away makes things worse because now your child is viewed as being weak. I'd be unbelievably proud to see my daughter standup to bullies.

My daughter has been doing karate since 3 years old and now also does mma. She has won championships against boys 2 years older than her. She is only 45 pounds. You can see her pic in my profile. Good job in putting her in self defense.

travisseger

I've done it once. On the sideline of my oldest daughter's co-ed flag football game. She was having a really good game and a parent from the other team instructed his son to "take her out." I was standing not far from the guy, so I moved beside him after I heard this, without letting him know I was her father. A few minutes later, his son puts a pretty nasty cheap shot on my daughter and the guy said out loud, "that will teach the little b***h." I may have gone a little ape-*kitten* in itroducing myself to him then. To the point that we had to be separated.

Fast forward two years later and my daughter shows up for the first practice of a new soccer season and this guy is her coach. I couldn't believe it. He acted like he had no idea who either one of us were. We played the season and he was a bit of an a-hole to all of the kids. Last practice of the year he got the parents out to play with the kids. We were on opposite teams and we may have had a collision and he may separated his shoulder. Not my proudest moment, but there's nothing I can do about it now.

I will not go after a parent for something that has happened between our children. Kids should learn how to work that stuff out without the parents getting involved. My youngest it too young to have to worry about bullying starting yet, and my oldest is an accomplished martial artist who can take care of herself if bullied, so I stay out of it and tell her to figure out a solution.

But I will go after a grown man who goes after my child. Every single time. I don't care if some consider it classless or not.

rml_16

Has anyone been in a situation where your child has got into it with another kid and one of the two parties ended up at the others door or went at it at the school?

No. We have some class where I come from.

So, you are saying these situations never happen in your neighborhood. Do you live in Pleasentville?

You specifically asked about MY child. Like I said, I have some class.

Hmmmmmm. Mayby I misunderstood. I do that often. Okay, let me give you a senario. On the way home from school, three neighborhood kids start throwing rocks at your child and there is a bruise on the cheek. What do you do. Me, I would call the police.

Obviously, that would be an appropriate response. But that is a far cry from getting into a fight with the other children's parents and NOT the same question at all.

Ollie, if you knew anything about me, you would find that particular comment about my child quite hilarious.

I find the fake silver spoon encrusted with plastic rhinestones shoved up you @ss to be quite hilarious, too.

You're adorable. :flowerforyou:

Akimajuktuq

My kid got his nose broken by another kid.


Turns out he got a little too big for his britches talking shlt in the football weight room. Got popped in the face.

Learned his lesson.

There was no need for me to get involved, my reaction was, "well you probably won't do that again, huh?"
He *was* 17, truth be told I probably would've freaked out more if he were younger.

eta: plus, there was nothing really to be done, a broken nose just heals itself, for the most part. If there was a hospital bill I would've been super pissed off.

Great parenting choice! Honestly, you got down to the bottom of it and you didn't try to rush in to protect your child who was in the wrong. When we don't hold our children accountable they learn to be entitled jerks. Too many of those in the world.

Also, I do not advocate violence; however, there is a time and a place for different reactions. If a child is being bullied, they need to tell an authority (but some kids get ignored when they do tell). Parents of kids who bully sometimes don't take it seriously (more entitled jerks in the making). However, any child should learn that when they are in real danger and are being hurt or about to be hurt and no adults are around, they have every right to defend themselves. I want my child home alive, if she has to punch someone out in order to do that, so be it.

srhershey

My daughter is almost 5 yrs old, and this is one topic that I've been thinking about in regards to raising my daughter. I don't ever want her to be a bully, but I want her to be able to stand up for herself. She is actually taking Taekwondo, will be graduating to a yellow stripe belt in Oct, and one of the lessons they teach is bully prevention and having a positive attitude and self esteem. My daughter has never hit, bit, or pushed another kid and I plan on keeping her that way. I do want her to grow up to be able to stand up for herself and hopefully someone who can't. I do know that if anyone bullies her, especially when I'm around, I wont hesitate to say something to the kid and/or parents. If that doesn't work, I'll have to turn into Mama Bear.

There is nothing classless than sticking up for yourself and/or family, especially your child. Just ignoring it and walking away makes things worse because now your child is viewed as being weak. I'd be unbelievably proud to see my daughter standup to bullies.

My daughter has been doing karate since 3 years old and now also does mma. She has won championships against boys 2 years older than her. She is only 45 pounds. You can see her pic in my profile. Good job in putting her in self defense.

That's awesome. I'm really hoping my daughter stays with this because of all of the benefits she can learn from Taekwondo. They actually offer a Bully Prevention class.

missjennifer1966

At the park once, there was a kid that pushed my daughter down a couple of times. The parent saw the whole thing. After the second time I asked her if she was going to do anything about it. She looked right at me and said no. I hollered at my daughter and told her if she did it again to knock the crap out of her. This mom couldn't believe I told her that. She grabbed her kid and said "We're leaving" to which my reply was "Have a great day". And for all the pacifists out there, yes, I taught my daughter that committing a violent act was OK and I don't really care what anyone thinks about it. Sometimes some people need knocked on their *kitten* to learn a lesson.

I agree totally!! I teach my kids to stand up for themselves. Teaching them to do nothing when they get hit is teaching them to be doormats the rest of their lives.

SuzinSullivan

When my son was in grade school, I had a mother come to my door and inform me that my son was bullying her son. I sat down with my son and explained to him how he was making the other child feel and followed it with a couple of weeks of grounding. He never bullied another child and became friends with the boy after apologizing. Now, he serves with the Canadian Armed Forces and stops bullying all over the world So it does pay to at least attempt to talk with the other parent and see if you can get results.

perfectingpatti

If a parent went to the other parent's house to discuss it, and it ended up with someone going off on the other? But Starting off the meeting badly.

I would never go to someone else's house to discuss anything their child was doing to mine. I would report it to the school or to the police, depending on what it is. If it's just that Sally won't be Susie's BFF anymore, no way. My kids can learn to deal with that crap themselves.
Now, if a parent came to MY house about something my child had done, I'd listen, thank them for bringing it to my attention, and then speak to my child about it to get both sides. If the parent came over hostile, I'd call the police.
I have 5 children, ages 25-10, and I've never had this happen.

keasarge

my childs two and one so not yet but im sure it will arise one day my two year old is non confrontational and will run my one year old will take them on though
id have no problem confronting parents involoving cops doing what ever it took but it would take all avenues to be exsausted before i socked someone

jenbit

I've done it once. On the sideline of my oldest daughter's co-ed flag football game. She was having a really good game and a parent from the other team instructed his son to "take her out." I was standing not far from the guy, so I moved beside him after I heard this, without letting him know I was her father. A few minutes later, his son puts a pretty nasty cheap shot on my daughter and the guy said out loud, "that will teach the little b***h." I may have gone a little ape-*kitten* in itroducing myself to him then. To the point that we had to be separated.

Fast forward two years later and my daughter shows up for the first practice of a new soccer season and this guy is her coach. I couldn't believe it. He acted like he had no idea who either one of us were. We played the season and he was a bit of an a-hole to all of the kids. Last practice of the year he got the parents out to play with the kids. We were on opposite teams and we may have had a collision and he may separated his shoulder. Not my proudest moment, but there's nothing I can do about it now.

I will not go after a parent for something that has happened between our children. Kids should learn how to work that stuff out without the parents getting involved. My youngest it too young to have to worry about bullying starting yet, and my oldest is an accomplished martial artist who can take care of herself if bullied, so I stay out of it and tell her to figure out a solution.

But I will go after a grown man who goes after my child. Every single time. I don't care if some consider it classless or not.

Awwwww I you for this

Charlie003

When my son was in grade school, I had a mother come to my door and inform me that my son was bullying her son. I sat down with my son and explained to him how he was making the other child feel and followed it with a couple of weeks of grounding. He never bullied another child and became friends with the boy after apologizing. Now, he serves with the Canadian Armed Forces and stops bullying all over the world So it does pay to at least attempt to talk with the other parent and see if you can get results.

Agreed

AuddAlise

Bump for later

sgv0918

Has anyone been in a situation where your child has got into it with another kid and one of the two parties ended up at the others door or went at it at the school?

No. We have some class where I come from.

So, you are saying these situations never happen in your neighborhood. Do you live in Pleasentville?

You specifically asked about MY child. Like I said, I have some class.

*Cat hiss!* SOMEBODY has a serious superiority complex. And yet, it's always people like that whose kids grow up to be those sh*thead little thugs that the cops are always busting for stealing Whip-its from the local 7-11.

Class, my @ss.

Amen

AuddAlise

When my oldest daughter was in 1st grade last year (she was 44 in tall and 35 lbs) a boy decided she was a good punching bag. The first time it happened was Halloween and another Mom saw it and told him to knock it off. He left her alone for a week. I walked up to pick her up after shcool and found this bully wailing on her in front of a dozen parents and a freaking teacher. I yelled at the child to stop hitting my daughter. He tightened his grip and punched her again. I walked over and removed his hand from her arm and yelled at the parents "Whats your problems"??? I then went and talked with the principal and her teacher.

Even after being disciplined by the school that little S!#T had the audacity to hit my daughter. I told her to hit him back as hard as she could and to run away. It happened a week later and they tried to discipline my daughter!!! I told them that it was their fault for not enforcing the zero tolerance policy that we ALL had to sign and that if they were going to punish my daughter for the same thing they were failing to punish her bully for that I would sue them and bleed them dry so she could go to a private school.

Apparently they talked with the parents because he has not hit my daughter again. Though I think their choice in putting him in her class this year is asinine. Why ask for trouble???

Charlie003

When my oldest daughter was in 1st grade last year (she was 44 in tall and 35 lbs) a boy decided she was a good punching bag. The first time it happened was Halloween and another Mom saw it and told him to knock it off. He left her alone for a week. I walked up to pick her up after shcool and found this bully wailing on her in front of a dozen parents and a freaking teacher. I yelled at the child to stop hitting my daughter. He tightened his grip and punched her again. I walked over and removed his hand from her arm and yelled at the parents "Whats your problems"??? I then went and talked with the principal and her teacher.

Even after being disciplined by the school that little S!#T had the audacity to hit my daughter. I told her to hit him back as hard as she could and to run away. It happened a week later and they tried to discipline my daughter!!! I told them that it was their fault for not enforcing the zero tolerance policy that we ALL had to sign and that if they were going to punish my daughter for the same thing they were failing to punish her bully for that I would sue them and bleed them dry so she could go to a private school.

Apparently they talked with the parents because he has not hit my daughter again. Though I think their choice in putting him in her class this year is asinine. Why ask for trouble???

You need to stay on top of it. I would tell the principal that if any incidents happen he can expect the news and your lawyer. Plus, if you are in good with other parents within the school who have strong boys, ask them to ask their boys to help out.

KiaCristal

My daughter is only 16 months so she hasn't really dealt with this but mama bear will be out if something does happen. I would try to talk to the parent but as someone else said earlier usually those kids learned it from their parents. She has 2 older cousins that don't realize she's still a baby and get rough with her and I step in and remind them to be nice and that she isn't able to play like that. I definitely use a harsh tone with them because no one else disciplines them. They know I don't play around and listen when I tell them something.

I will definitely teach her to stand up for herself. I think it's very important. If you stand up to someone you can usually get them to knock off the crap.

I may or may not have been a bully in high school. I like to think of it as being tough but I was probably meaner to some girls than I should have been. Nothing I'm proud of but it was also 20 some years ago.

When I was little I was playing with one of the neighborhood boys and he picked up a stick and hit me with it. I went in crying to my parents that he hit me. My dad said if he does it again hit him back. Went back out to play and he hit me again. I found the biggest stick I could carry and hit him back. He stopped hitting me and he was the one running to his parents crying.

Charlie003

rOUND 2

kimg68

When my oldest son was in 2nd grade, his teacher called me one time to tell me that she spoke to him about his teasing another classmate. She said it was not a big deal really, but she wanted to make me aware of it. It was a big deal to me, I was furious with my son. I made him sit down that night and write a letter to this kid apologizing to him, and I told him he had to list 5 things in the letter that he liked about this boy, and I told him that he would sit with this kid every day at lunchtime for the rest of the school year. I also made him write a letter to the boys parents, apologizing to them too, and making a promise to never tease their son again. When I had spoken with the teacher, she explained to me that this boy wasn't considered to be popular, and my son was the kid everyone wanted to be friends with, so my point in having him sit with this boy during lunchtime, was to teach him some compassion for other kids.

The next day my son gave the boy the letter, and invited the boy to sit with him at lunchtime. My son became friends with this boy, and now they are both in Middle School together and they are still friends. No kid of mine will ever be a bully. Not on my watch.

lilacsun

My daughter is almost 5 yrs old, and this is one topic that I've been thinking about in regards to raising my daughter. I don't ever want her to be a bully, but I want her to be able to stand up for herself. She is actually taking Taekwondo, will be graduating to a yellow stripe belt in Oct, and one of the lessons they teach is bully prevention and having a positive attitude and self esteem. My daughter has never hit, bit, or pushed another kid and I plan on keeping her that way. I do want her to grow up to be able to stand up for herself and hopefully someone who can't. I do know that if anyone bullies her, especially when I'm around, I wont hesitate to say something to the kid and/or parents. If that doesn't work, I'll have to turn into Mama Bear.

There is nothing classless than sticking up for yourself and/or family, especially your child. Just ignoring it and walking away makes things worse because now your child is viewed as being weak. I'd be unbelievably proud to see my daughter standup to bullies.

This!!!

Iceman1800

At the park once, there was a kid that pushed my daughter down a couple of times. The parent saw the whole thing. After the second time I asked her if she was going to do anything about it. She looked right at me and said no. I hollered at my daughter and told her if she did it again to knock the crap out of her. This mom couldn't believe I told her that. She grabbed her kid and said "We're leaving" to which my reply was "Have a great day". And for all the pacifists out there, yes, I taught my daughter that committing a violent act was OK and I don't really care what anyone thinks about it. Sometimes some people need knocked on their *kitten* to learn a lesson.

no, you taught her she has a right to defend herself. She wasn't the aggressor.

AuddAlise

When my oldest daughter was in 1st grade last year (she was 44 in tall and 35 lbs) a boy decided she was a good punching bag. The first time it happened was Halloween and another Mom saw it and told him to knock it off. He left her alone for a week. I walked up to pick her up after shcool and found this bully wailing on her in front of a dozen parents and a freaking teacher. I yelled at the child to stop hitting my daughter. He tightened his grip and punched her again. I walked over and removed his hand from her arm and yelled at the parents "Whats your problems"??? I then went and talked with the principal and her teacher.

Even after being disciplined by the school that little S!#T had the audacity to hit my daughter. I told her to hit him back as hard as she could and to run away. It happened a week later and they tried to discipline my daughter!!! I told them that it was their fault for not enforcing the zero tolerance policy that we ALL had to sign and that if they were going to punish my daughter for the same thing they were failing to punish her bully for that I would sue them and bleed them dry so she could go to a private school.

Apparently they talked with the parents because he has not hit my daughter again. Though I think their choice in putting him in her class this year is asinine. Why ask for trouble???

You need to stay on top of it. I would tell the principal that if any incidents happen he can expect the news and your lawyer. Plus, if you are in good with other parents within the school who have strong boys, ask them to ask their boys to help out.

My daughter has a brother who is 3 years older and a whole heck of a lot bigger (He's 10 and is 5 ft tall and weighs 76 lbs.) I have had to tell him to not do anything because he wants to beat the snot out of that kid. I am keeping an eye on the situation and my MIL is at the school 2 days a week to volunteer so she keeps an eye out too.

AuddAlise

I had forgotten about this one until another post sparked the memory.

When my second daughter was in kindergarten a couple of little girls were teasing her because she was wearing pants to school. Mind you it was the dead of winter (in SoCal) and about 50 degrees. The little girls were wearing skirts with tights. My second daughter is nothing like my oldest daughter...she turned it around on them that their Mom's must not care much about them becuase they wern't dressed properly. The girls ended up crying and left my daughter alone the rest of the year. :bigsmile: