looking old?

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racermom
racermom Posts: 36
in Motivation and Support
I am 4 pounds from my 2nd goal weight. My hubby told me to stop and my mom in law rudely told me that I was too thin and "that (I) had gone too far" I am frustrated that noone cares to recognize my accomplishments. I was wondering if anyone else has felt the same pressure from the fam and do you think that loosing "too much" can make you look aged?

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  • genma1987
    genma1987 Posts: 43 Member
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    Yes, I went through very similar reactions from people. The would tell me I was too thin, when really, I could lose another 5 - 10 lbs. It might have something to do with people not having a realistic idea of what a "normal" size person is, and also people being used to us being "big" people, it makes them uncomfortable to be around us when we look so different. As for looking old; I thought for awhile that my face looked particularly old, but my skin must have adjusted to my new weight because I don't look as "saggy" as I thought I did last year at this time.
  • 135gratitude
    135gratitude Posts: 364
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    I know how frustrating it can be - but take it as a compliment. You are doing amazingly well, and I think on some level jealousy may play a role.

    As for looking older, I did think that about some of the Biggest Loser constestants - that they looked older once they lost all the weight, but as the previous poster said, your skin will adjust (and I doubt you look older with 48 lbs lost!).

    Congrats on your great accomplishments!
  • ambercole
    ambercole Posts: 426
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    I actually have this issue with some of my friends all the time. Any time I start to lose weight they will say things like " oh you don't need to lose any more weight" or " you're too skinny", even though I an literally like 60lbs heavier than they are. :explode:
  • BamaRose0107
    BamaRose0107 Posts: 635
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    Losing to much weight can cause a person to look older. However you are the only one that knows your body and knows what weight is best. It is a shock sometimes when family members see a big difference in your weight. For me I was always large and one time obese and that is what my family got used to. Now when family members see me (especially if its been a long time) I think it is a little bit of shock.. I don't know how many times I have heard that I just don't look like myself anymore.
  • racermom
    racermom Posts: 36
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    thank you for your input. I guess I needed to vent a little. I REALLY need to concentrate on me and NOT what others think....this has always been a weakness for me. Thank you for your support and keep up the good work! :flowerforyou:
  • teetee1281
    teetee1281 Posts: 1,076 Member
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    I really agree with Genma, though no one really knows what a normal size look like, we either see overweight, obese, or TV super skinny. I definitely understand the way that you feel. Though, for me, I have to lose weight for the Navy, and that is what I always explain to people, that according to the Navy's standards, I am still over weight. As long as you are losing weight for the right reasons, you should stay positive because in the long run, it will be YOU that would benefit the most!
    As for your husband, you have to remember, that he loved you before you started to lose weight and it will take a while for him to get use to it. My husband, is supportive of my working out and eating right, but he too fears that I would be too skinny, but he knows that my reasons for doing so are good and valid, so he tries his best to be supportive.
  • madmama
    madmama Posts: 123 Member
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    The only person that seemed to think I didn't need to lose more weight was my doctor. That was back in the summer when I was 149 pounds. i mentioned that I wanted to be at 135 and she said that 149 was a good weight for me and that if I went lower it maybe too much. I am now 2 pounds away from my goal and most want to know what I have been doing so that maybe they can incorporate some of the things I have been doing into their plan. I will now try to tone up my body now as my body fat is still high.

    I think you need to do what you think is best for you. No one else can really say what is too low for you. I think what makes us look older as we lose weight is that the skin doesn't have the elasticity it did when we were younger. Good luck in your journey.

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