148 days - 56lb lost. My story so far

When I decided to start my journey, I began writing emails to myself from work to put down my thoughts for the day. I wanted to be able to look back and see what influences in my life were affecting my weight loss.

I gave myself 148 days in which I was going to do my best whatever happened, that way any failure was not because I didn’t try.
My left knee is bone to bone and seriously affects my mobility, in fact when beginning this I was contemplating using crutches or a wheelchair to get around. That is the reason why I began this quest.

Here is my stthoughts during those 148 days:

DAY 1
Well, here goes. All enthusiastic and raring to go. Target: 112lb in 148 days!
Rang some Personal Trainers at the gym and set up an appointment with two of them. Free sessions so that will be good to test myself and to test them to see how we get on and whether they are up to the challenge!
Feeling okay, filling in MFP screens - wow didn't know what the calorific values for some things are. I know I didn't eat like those big people you see in the magazines, but it's WHAT I am eating that is making me put on weight or stay the same! I shall be cutting out the margarine and butter for definite!
Planning to go to the gym every day.
DAY 2
Had my measurements taken on the machine thingy at the gym last night - no weight lost since October (!) but I knew I had put on some over December, so the BMI has gone up slightly. However, I have put on skeletal muscle and my Visceral Fat and other measurements relating to muscles are good so I am starting to tone.
Good start to today, scrambled eggs on toast with tea and a satsuma. Bit hard to get down so won't be having 2 eggs and bread again in a hurry! Stick to toast and marmalade, although the cooked meal did help stave off the hunger for most of the morning.
Had a good day foodwise at work, LOADS of fruit and Slimming World foods - spent 7.5syns on crackers for colleagues' birthday celebrations (but no sausage rolls, sausages or crisps). Nice low fat dinner, although I will be at the gym so will have that later.
I know it is early days, but I feel better already! Didn't really get a good workout last night, so I will make a better effort today. I do feel upbeat about the whole thing and the daily/hourly countdown on my pc at work is really helping me to focus on the short period of time I am going to be doing this! I know there will be hard days, even BAD days but I am already planning my holiday!
My husband and Son (age 21) are very supportive, they listen politely to my ramblings and try to seem interested when I talk about personal trainers, gym workouts and what meal to plan next.
Today I feel really bloaty and frumpy, I have spots on my face and my hair is lank and frizzy. I guess it will get worse before it gets better.
DAY 3
I feel like I am less bloated today, although I am writing this in the morning! Had a nice swim last night and burned some more calories. I can't wait until I start seeing some results - I have a free PT session booked for Saturday morning and another on Tuesday evening. I am really close to deciding to take a PT as I think it will be good for me although expensive!
I have had to take my food to work in a bigger bag! All the fruit and water and salad etc is taking up too much room in my small coolbag and handbag so the salad is in the coolbag and the fruit and nibbles are in a big shopping bag!
I find myself planning the next meal in my head and thinking about food a lot. I hope this will go away because I don't want to be constantly thinking about where the next meal or snack is coming from. I am pleased with myself for yesterday; colleagues had a birthday get together which usually involves cake and fatty things. I stuck to the fruit and low cal crackers with philly. My big test will come when I am in a social environment with booze and other snacks available - the countdown clock is a brilliant idea, on my desktop it constantly reminds me about the days to go, and I now have a tear off countdown in my bedroom thanks to my lovely son. Each morning I wake and tear off the sheet showing how many days left. Great idea.
It is early in the day, so I may add something to this later.
DAY 4
Well, it's all about the WEE today so far!
Can't remember the last time I went to the loo so many times in one morning! Must be good news, if nothing else I am losing water.....hehehe
Workout last night was good, I did weights first then bike for 20 then armbike for 5 - I really made an effort and sweated for England. The legs are a bit sore today because I did 20 minutes on the bike all at one time, but I can still walk and do not have too many aches and pains - well, no more than usual really.
I feel quite excited today - I think it is because I know I am in this one for the whole journey - in the past I have said the right things but buckled after a week or two. I am not going to let anything get in the way - there is only 145 days to go after all!
My head feels a bit thick and headachey today too - I am keeping the water levels up and eating every hour or so with fruit - perhaps it is a carbohydrate withdrawal? Don't get headaches anymore because of the painkillers I am always taking so I guess its just the change of regime that's affecting me.
Seeing the Personal Trainer I took on (Matt) tomorrow. I am hoping he will do my measurements - and that I have lost in the right places and gained in the right places since Day 1 - looking forward to it really. Spoke to a woman yesterday who knows someone who has a PT once a month and said the results are noticeable very quickly. Good news.
DAY 8
No "cheating" so far. Although I have it in my mind that the only cheating I will be doing is to myself - so if I want to eat something I will, but I also accept that sometimes I will but most of the times I won't.
The weekend was good. Saw Matt the Personal Trainer on Saturday. I learned so much from that session, and it was just a fact finding session not even a proper PT session
Yesterday I didn't go to the gym, I had a busy weekend and with the PT session tonight I thought it best to rest.
Foodwise everything is going well. My tastes are changing, and I find I am analysing more what I eat and making healthier choices.
I can't wait to get weighed tonight. It will be one week!
DAY 12
I had my first proper Personal Trainer session last night. Boy did Matt work me hard!
I started with the bike which killed my legs. Then onto the leg press, started at 20kg but by the time he finished with me I was pressing 75kg! No adverse problems with the knees either.
I went on the leg pullup to work the hamstrings - I found that difficult as I can't straighten my knee and find it uncomfortable.
Next a squat against the wall, holding for 30 seconds, although I did 39 apparently. Horrible.
Then standing with dumbbells and laying on the ball with dumbbells out to the side. Hard.
Next was the Lat pulldown, then standing pulldown.
Back to the ball for situps. Nice, loosens the back but then the abs kick in!
Tricep pulldown - didn't like that.
Rowing - I didn't even know I was supposed to attempt this! I found it good, felt the abs working and the pulling motion was quite satisfying.
After training we had a chat about nutrition and I found that although I was eating relatively healthily now just things like Mullerlight are the wrong type of yoghurt! Best to aim for Greek (Total) yoghurt apparently. Matt sent a nutrition plan which actually seems do-able so I am going to really give it a go.
Doctor's appointment tomorrow, hopefully my bloodpressure is not 170/100 this time! I am working out and eating healthily so if it is not better then I shall be miffed. I will not want to be put onto proper BP tablets.
So far it is a good day.
DAY 14
Today started badly - last night I had the shakes and shivers and felt decidedly ill. I couldn't get warm and then overnight got really hot and sweaty with a temperature and a headache.
During today I have felt better but not really had any appetite and feel tired - probably because I didn't sleep very well. Picked up a bit by the end of the day and will be biking home from work so that will be a good test.
Went to the gym on Sunday, did cardio, not too bad but sweated buckets. Got weights tonight which is good because I don't think I could do much cardio today. Friends at work keep telling me that I should rest more and only go to the gym 3 times a week, but when you want to lose 8 stone in 5 months that is not really an option. Of course I shall rest but when I need to. I really hope I don't get ill and have to put back some training days as that will set my progress back.
Really pleased with myself because Colin and Daryl had a 14" pizza, chips, garlic bread and onion rings last night, I had vegetable soup...... admittedly I was feeling unwell but still resisted the urge to partake of the dreaded calories.
I got a top on today which was a bit snug and I hadn't worn it yet. Result! Must have lost a couple of inches anyway!
I should have seen Matt tonight, but put him off until Wednesday evening, so I can recover and hopefully when he weighs me I will have a loss this week too.
DAY 14
My first NSV! - usually I don't take anything upstairs because I need to hang onto the side and haul myself upstairs gasping as I go! My first NSV is walking upstairs with arms full of a pile of washing and not having to cling onto the rail to struggle up there! Massive small victory for me. The gym is paying off!
I am feeling good today, biked in to work so maybe that helped. Had a good workout last night with weights. Seeing Matt tomorrow evening and was going to get weighed but decided that if I haven't lost as much as I hoped it would be demoralising and may affect how I am getting on. If he offers to weigh me then I will take it, but if not I shall wait until he mentions it - I think he was going to do it after 4 weeks anyway.
DAY 16
Another good day, apart from the rain and getting into work late because I didn't want to bike!
Beginning to feel smaller around the upper middle (under the boobs) and my daughter (26) says she can notice the top half smaller now. I am getting up easier from my work chair and seem to be walking a bit better too. I can't really believe that I have stuck to this for 16 days without ANY deviation! Wow.
I have my second session with MATT tonight at 7. I have planned what we are having for tea (early). The key is in the planning!
My lunchbox looks like a health junkie's - lots of fruit, yoghurt, salmon, nuts and I am drinking lots of water. Still seem to be sweating a lot but maybe that is just my age haha. The appetite is not so strong, so at times I don't really fancy anything to eat, but I am forcing something in because I know I will need it when I exercise – my new mantra is: Food Is Fuel.
I still am having a sort-of period, which isn't too bad but just annoying because it has been dragging on a few weeks now. Not sure I will get the 8 stone by the end of May, but I will be able to say I gave it a flamin good try.
Crikey Matt worked me hard today! The honeymoon is over....didn't last long hehe.
He had me doing a sort of circuit thing in the free weights and on the ball and in the machines. No rest, just 15 reps, change, 15 reps, change...... 4 sets of everything. Wow. I also did a timed thing on the rower which I guess will be done again next week.
However, I didn't ache too much, apart from the lats and obliques which woke themselves up! I CAN still move though so it was not too bad. I couldn't talk throughout the session but we had a chat afterwards to catch up. He wants me to keep to 60mins 5-6 times a week alternating cardio one night with weights the next.
As far as everyday life is concerned, I still feel guilty leaving everything at home and going to the gym each evening - Mum keeps calling to ask me or us to pop over but I just can't (and don't want to) mess with my schedule at the moment. But Colin and Daryl are so understanding and supportive with my goals that I will eventually grow to accept that this is MY TIME! and I really think it is now or never.
Day 17
I did cardio and interspersed it with flys on the ball and situps on the ball - the situps seemed easy so I am getting stronger there. I felt trembly after the workout so (I am told) this is a good sign that I have been working properly.
I actually am beginning to think about going to the gym in a positive light, not a chore. I KNOW that my men supporting me has a HUGE impact on how I feel - if they were not supporting me I would just give up. Thanks boys!
Day 18
I am feeling my muscles in my middle area and back, but nothing I can't live with. However, my knee is very sore today, I iced it this morning but it doesn't seem to have helped. Will rest it as much as possible. Weights tonight so shouldn't be too bad and I will ice it after.
DAY 22
The weekend was hard - my knee had been hurting which seemed to affect my quads. So much so that I cancelled meeting my friend in town! I didn't go to the gym that day either.
Sunday I rested but decided to go to the gym anyway - good idea - although it hurt and was very stiff I managed the weights and a bit of biking which seemed to loosen things. I iced and rested afterwards and Monday it was nearly back to normal!
Monday was not a good day psychologically. I felt despondent because I don't see any noticeable results after all the effort I am putting in. I do feel better around the upper middle under the boobs, but apart from being a bit stronger when doing my reps I can't notice much more.
Anyway, Tuesday is here and today I am feeling GOOD. I am constantly thinking about the next good things I can eat but mostly about the next session at the gym. Looking forward to seeing Matt tomorrow evening, it's been two weeks since the programme begun so I expect he will work me hard like he did last week, then give me a harder programme for the next two weeks.
Not really had any challenges yet, apart from getting into the mindset of going to the gym every day. The only challenge is getting fed before working out because I don't want to be cooking at 10pm every night.
I have to speak to Matt about supplements/protein shakes. Hopefully he can help.
DAY 25
Good workout last night, 10 mins on the bike then doubled my time on the rower to 20 mins (5 mins x 4 with 2 min break in between each rep). Feel it a bit this morning and can't wait to do it again. I really like the rower and will be doing that as my cardio from now on! Took my heart rate in between the rowing reps and found it quite interesting that my lower bpm of 130 was quite hard to achieve - will have to work a bit harder to get higher into my fat burning zone (130 to 144bpm).
Matt says I can start upping my weights as I find them getting easier - good job he said that because I was waiting for him to do it, not knowing I could take charge of my own workout when he is not there. Will take a pen tonight so I can adjust my weights on the chart he gave me.
Finding it a little difficult to eat enough - hopefully the protein shake will arrive today so I can supplement that if I don't feel like eating after workout - which is getting increasingly likely.
My tops are feeling a little looser - not much but it's a start. About time.
The zits are clearing up, I am having my hair cut tomorrow (shorter!) and generally still feeling positive! GOOD!
DAY 29
Well, last night I noticed a small amount of definition in my arms whilst doing the lat pulldown - the muscles are finally getting through the fat! I feel bloomin marvellous, the legs are stronger, the breathing is better and overall I feel FANTASTIC.
I can't believe it could get any better but I am sure it will because I am improving fitness and health all the time. Bring it on.
No challenges to speak of so far, we are at the straight after work so we will probably eat up there - it's eat all you can fish and chips night but I feel I want to stick to one small portion otherwise I will get belly ache from all the fat. I might just have a salad anyway. No booze. We'll see. I know what I am like (well what I WAS LIKE) I am a new person now!
Keep up the good work - me!
DAY 57
Hi, I haven't written for quite a while - all was going brilliantly. The gym programme and nutrition is working, the weight is coming off slowly, people are noticing - although Matt only weighed me once since I started and 20lb was gone. That's 30lb in total!
Great.
Now, Matt wants to tweak the nutrition as I wasn't quite losing the 4lb per week he predicted. I am struggling today.
I am really trying to look at food as "nutrition" and "fuel" but today is the first day since I started that I consciously went to the shop at work, picked up some flapjack things and really wanted the protein and carbs to be right so I could eat it. Of course it wasn't so I put them back - that's progress I suppose. Before I started this I would have listened to my inner demon and had the bar anyway. I did buy something - a diet coke.
I needed to write this down. I will feel better later - I find the numbers and grams/carbs/proteins etc very daunting. Matt is really busy and I don't want to sound stupid and keep texting him to ask questions. Surely I can do this myself!??!
Maybe something else is going on in my body, in fact I feel quite tearful - a total no no - I don't do tears! I do have a bit of a throat thing going on and feel a bit under the weather - it seems to be since I stopped taking 500mg ibuprofen 3 times a day. My knee hurts (muscular not bony), my back aches and I can't really concentrate for long.
Well tomorrow is another day.
DAY 80
The last five weeks have been really good, I am in the zone when exercising, I work hard every time and am feeling the benefits. I have gone down TWO sizes on my trousers and all my tops are too big. I shall not be buying much in the way of new clothes at least for a few more months anyway.
Today is not a good day. I got measured last night, but only lost 2lb in the last five weeks! Absolutely not funny. Losing 20lb the first five weeks was great, even though it was expected to lose a few more lbs than that at that time. Matt was confused this time too. I know I haven't been an angel with the food, but I have near as damn it stuck to the plan. Anyway, someone who has as much to lose as me should be able to deviate a tiny bit in one meal and not pay the price by not losing any weight.
I have felt low and sad all day. I am more determined to carry on though. No thoughts of giving up. I know it is possible to have plateaus, blips and static phases, so I shall carry on doing what I am doing and hope to get over this. Matt is tweaking the nutrition and I will start on that as soon as it is done.
The exercise is not a problem at all. I am getting stronger each week, I can KNEEL on the floor now! Which was just a dream 10 weeks ago. I can now get down onto the floor to do exercises and there is not much pain at all. I am fitter and more healthy, and when I see the GP in a couple of weeks hopefully the BP is down too. Walking upstairs hardly draws a breath and I don't dread walking a few yards if I have to.
DAY 84
Just thought I would list some of the benefits I have gained since starting my quest 84 days ago:
HOW IT USED TO BE;
1 Low self esteem (although I thought it never showed)
2 Extreme pain whilst walking short distances (even across a room)
3 Couldn't walk upstairs without getting puffed
4 Walked upstairs hanging onto the side and pulling myself up
5 Housework difficult - standing for any length of time
6 Couldn't get down onto the floor (extremely difficult to get down)
7 Unable to kneel at all
8 Felt like I couldn't do anything, just wanted to sit around
9 Felt constantly lethargic
10 Couldn't stick to tasks for any length of time
11 Ate too much at a time
12 Always told myself "life's too short - just have it (food, booze etc)
13 Kept focussing on weight loss (or lack of it)
HOW IT IS NOW:
1 Much more positive self esteem
2 Hardly any pain whilst walking short distances
3 Can now walk upstairs easily
4 Don't have to hold on going up stairs
5 Housework is much easier - although I still don't like it! hee hee
6 Can get down onto floor carefully (and back up again)
7 Kneels to do exercises
8 Much more willing to get up and move about
9 Feel much more energised and ready to try anything
10 Always go for "one more" or "just finish it"
11 Eat properly to sustain my programme and fitness levels
12 Tell myself "life is good" and enjoy each day
13 Don't bother too much about the weight loss, it's more about how I feel and my next exercise "fix"
Don't get me wrong, my life was okay before, but I just didn't realise what road I was going down and how I had allowed things to become.
DAY 88
Still feeling extremely good! I am a completely different person now. I am trying so hard to eat healthily - after the last five weeks where no weight was lost I am now trying to stick to proteins for 3 days with 1 day of carbs in between. Matt says this will get my body using the fat to exercise on the protein days, and just before it starts depleting the muscles for energy, a carb day will put things right and reset it to using fat for energy instead of muscle.
I ache in different places today (hands and forearms....) - the PT session was good (I really enjoy these sessions with Matt now instead of being apprehensive about what is going to happen to me!). I am able to LUNGE - yes lunge! The first time I tried that at the beginning I had to hold a bar beside me and could hardly get down at all. Now I can nearly lunge properly without pain but also without holding on to anything. Magic. The knees and thighs are paying the price today tho! I also had a go at Burpees - the first few were a bit crap but got the hang of it and really tried to have a go, it was a bit sedate but I managed it which is what counts - next time I will be better.
Another bonus is being able to lay on the floor and do abs exercises. Getting up off the floor is reasonably okay too, I just have to be careful not to twist the knee or try to get up too quickly.
I really hope the BP is down when I see the GP next week. With the protein/carb cycle I also hope that the next weigh in in a couple of weeks is showing results too. Otherwise I will really be pissed with myself.
DAY 99
Crikey, I feel good! Just had the Easter weekend. I accidentally got drunk on the Friday (!) - that doesn't take much now haha. Went out to the pub on Saturday with hubby and friends and also went for a meal on the Saturday and thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it all. I don't feel guilty, I know I deserve a celebration and the wonderful feelings and compliments I received too!
I still go to the gym every day in fact it is not a chore at all (I don't think it ever was really) I really look forward to it and can't wait to get stuck in each day. The receptionist at the gym said I should have a "proper" rest day and not come to the gym but I can rest like that when I am looking how I want to look! I do sort of rest one day a week, I just do the cardio and not weights, so that will do for now.
Each Personal Training session is fun (yes fun) and although it is hard work (I don't expect it not to be!) I really enjoy it, I think Matt knows that and keeps pushing me - I think I surprise us both sometimes. He suggests trying something, I think I can't do it, he says I can do it, I do it! He is more used to my limitations and motivations and seems to have a good handle on what I need. I went to Body Pump on Saturday too, although I felt a bit awkward not knowing the moves, but was pleased that the weights Matt suggested I should use felt light and next time I shall use heavier ones! I did feel it for the next couple of days but in a good way, not agony.
Hubby looked at a long ballgown for me this week (he never shows much interest, so that's a first...) He said I should try it on (it is a size 18, which is 4 sizes down from a size 26) but I didn't try it - I sort of regret it a bit cos I could have used it as a benchmark. I am sure it would have been too tight and I didn't really want to get downhearted even though I know I am not really ready for size 18 yet. There will be other dresses and opportunities. If I get to a standard size 16/18 I will be ecstatic.
Compliments are coming thick and fast now. But I have to stay focussed and not rest on my laurels. I have 50 days to go til target and I want to be able to say I really tried my hardest so whatever results I get I know I will have earned. I know I won't make my original wish of 112lb loss but at least I will have had a good try. I don't really mind, losing half of that would be good and I know I shall keep going after the holiday anyway. God I hope something doesn't get in the way, like illness or injury. That would be a blow.
DAY 122
Not much to say really. The weightloss has been static for about 7 weeks now. BUT Matt weighed and measured me last week and the results are in - no change in the weight but the Body Fat has gone down from 42% to 37.5%. He says that's good. I am pleased cos it shows that at least the fat weight is going even if it's being replaced with muscle weight.
We are changing the nutrition slightly; porridge only for breakfast, protein shake at 10.30, lunch as usual (tuna, pitta, salad etc), nuts at 3pm and early dinner pre training with protein shake and banana after training.
We are also changing the training too; he says we will up the CV and do more super sets with less breaks. That should hopefully start things off again weightwise.
I am loving the fact that I can now do weighted lunges and squats! Who would have thought that would have been possible when I first began this journey? Actually I quite enjoy lunges I guess it's because I CAN do them now as opposed to not being able to even attempt them before.
DAY 144
Well, I haven't logged for a while. Everything has been going relatively smoothly - apart from not losing a pound of weight for about 12weeks! My Dad also died a couple of weeks ago, which was devastating and got me down for a while. I managed to keep on track with most things during this time, in fact it helped to be able to do something for myself whilst at the same time supporting Mum and arranging the details of the funeral and helping Mum sort out bank accounts, notifications and pensions etc.
Now I know that I truly am in this for the long haul. My Personal Training sessions are hard work and challenging, but I look forward to what Matt gives me every week - he is so supportive and encourages me, I believe he really has a strong desire to see me succeed. I have realised that my previous competitive streak has resurfaced and that is why I am enjoying exercising and the programmes so much. I feel young and strong again and even if I can't do sports any more at least I have an outlet for my new found energy.
The next stage (in five days time!) is to come up with a new target. Originally it was about losing 8 stone - that has long gone and I am now looking for a physical challenge as well as making my body look better and perform how I want it to. I don't want to be a fitness model or anything, although that would be a fantastic goal, but I would like to continue to reduce my body size, tone up all the loose skin which seems to be appearing (!) and strive to be better at what I am doing.
I have arranged a night out with friends and family to "celebrate" my effort - and I have a two week holiday planned soon. After that, it's back to the plan and next stop is my birthday in November!
END OF PHASE ONE RESULTS:
Lost 56lb (4stone), down 4 dress sizes, 27cm off the waist, body fat down 10%
NSVs: (Non Scale Victories) – noted during my summer holiday in Greece:
1. Fitting comfortably into the plane seat. Instead of a lap belt extension I did up the seatbelt without problem AND had six inches to spare.
2. On the plane, the lap tray came down without touching my belly.
3. Getting in and out of the swimming pool without having to cling onto the steps rail and haul myself up. Just climbed out without effort (strong legs!)
4. Turning over on a sunbed without having to sit up, struggle to turn and then flop down. Just turned over as I lay there (strong abs, back, arms!)
5. Walking over 4 miles one day (in 40deg heat).
6. Walking over 2 miles each day.
7. More energy throughout the day and evening.
8. Walking down a REALLY steep incline to a beach - and back again (lunges!)
9. JUMPING off a 2' drop from a boat onto a beach - no pain on landing whatsoever.
10. Climbing up a wobbly ladder back onto a boat. Once from standing, twice from swimming in the sea.
If you want to see pictures, look at my profile as I can’t work out how to do it here.

The next phase is ending on 5th November, my birthday. I want to lose another 4 stone by then.