How to not hate myself when I eat sweets?
SkyMusic
Posts: 43
Hi, so I've been working really hard for about six months (been using MFP on and off). I'm really close to my goal weight and I feel great. I work out every day and am consistently under my cal goal. So I should be able to eat something like whole wheat pasta, a muffin, cookie, or cake every once in a while. My philosophy is everything in moderation. I'm scared that if I eat one of those foods that I won't be able to stop, and I'll ruin everything. How can I stop this? How can I stop hating myself at the thought of returning to a diet that includes pasta, rice, and desert?
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Replies
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I love myself enough to eat those things.0
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I eat mini cakes every night.... 150 to 200 cals each depending on what I put in them.... I just make sure it fits my budget!!0
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That's a total brain block and if you're actually that worked up about it you should probably talk to a professional. Orthorexia nervosa is an actual issue and if you're actually as keyed up as you make yourself sound to be you might want to talk to someone.0
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Believe it or not, you're not alone! I don't go so far as to hate myself when I eat those things, however. I feel like I've sidetracked myself or somehow done something wrong. One way to approach eating treats like those are to schedule cheat meals for yourself. It's perfectly fine to have 1-2 cheat meals a week. Took me a while to realize that cheat meals are essential to a) breaking up the monotony of eating the same thing all the time and b) motivating me to "behave" so I can have the cheat meal. When you've earned it (like eating well ALL week!!), then it might be less of a let down to you. It's not a "cheat" meal, then, in this instance. It's a reward meal Works for me! Maybe it'll work for you. Point being, don't beat yourself up for eating something yummy, that's just silly. But if you feel like you're derailing your progress with those yummy treats, then reign in your eating a bit and only treat yourself when you've earned it. Good luck!0
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I glanced at your profile. Are you still in recovery? With your past of disordered eating, it makes sense that getting to maintenance will be difficult for you. See if there is someone at your University you can talk to for support on reintroducing those foods.0
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Measure it out and eat it slow0
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Make sure you budget for it in your food diary! Start small, take it slow. You want to be able to sustain this lifestyle, so you need to eventually learn how to have self-control. You will never be able to sustain a 100% perfect diet! Someday you are going to eat the things you love, and by taking it slow and portioning it out you will be able to enjoy the things you love again, not hate yourself for it.
Some have suggested getting help, and I think that's also a viable option! Do what it takes to take care of yourself as a whole!0 -
i do from time to time feel a bit guilty about the super sweets. but i do allow myself to have them in moderation.... i eat back some of my workout calories, and sometimes, its junk food.
as long as you are eating balanced and within your calorie goal MOST of the time, you can have those sweets every now and then. even if you go over a bit.
if you are afraid you won't be able to stop, don't keep it in the house. buy a little debbie cake at the store, and not a whole box.... and savor it.......0 -
Just read your profile and I second the comments about seeking advice from a counselor. Developing a healthy relationship with food takes a lot more than following a meal plan Sorry I didn't realize what kind of assistance you needed when I wrote my earlier post. College life is stressful no matter who you are (but especially as a musician! Music major here!) There is no need for you to try and balance all that comes with it along with this burden on your own.0
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Remember that you have been strong enough to get to where you are. You are human.... you can treat yourself an adjust other things to make it all balance out. Trust in yourself.... you have strength in abundance... trust it.....0
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I am the same. Been doing ok trying to workout and eat right. But today I ate like 4 muffins cus once I start I can not stop. I hated myself all day. Once I did my walk I felt better but just don't give up cus I never will.0
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I'll third the idea of counseling. You're over-thinking it and it sounds like you have some form of anxiety that you're using to subconsciously blow up the situation to its worst outcome before you even attempt it and then you hate yourself for a "crime" you didn't even commit.
Yes at first you may be tempted to eat more than a moderate portion because you've gone without, but you have to train your mind to remember that it won't be the last time you taste it, that you don't have to binge as though it were the last time you'd have anything ever again. Keeping limited supplies of these items in the house could help as well.
In the end there's no reason to hate yourself for something as silly as eating candy or a cookie or whatever. You're not committing a sin, you're not betraying anything and you're not hurting anyone. You're letting yourself have something you like. With this being a lifestyle change, you're going to be doing what you're doing a long time so why not incorporate these things instead of live without them? This isn't a torture method.0 -
Thank you all for your answers, it's helped a lot and has been very thought provoking. I did do counseling before, but I had a couple awful experiences with it. Still, I probably just had bad luck, and there's no harm in trying it again.
Thanks again...I guess I'll just keep trying to take it day by day.0 -
Hmmm - I am only commenting on the "returning to a diet of .....sweets, etc".
After all the years of dieting and putting weight on and taking it off again - I have finally learned. This is forever - this is how thin, healthy people do it - calories in and calories out. We can never return to how it was before - at least I can't!
Now - I have been on maintenance a year but even when I was in weight loss mode, I allowed myself treats if they fit into my calories. I waited until the end of the day - after dinner (my worse time) and enjoyed my little treat. It was something to work for the rest of the day.
This is real life - it's OK to indulge 5-10% of the time - just don't overdo it every day. Have a special occasion this weekend - work out extra hard and be VERY good for 6 days of the 7! Exercise is KEY! Life life and enjoy the "sweetness".0 -
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90% That is my goal; to eat right 90% of the time. Most the time this no problem and those cheat nights or built in treats are part of a healthy relationship with food. Occasional sweets won't hurt you if you aren't eating a steady diet of them and nothing else. In fact, I eat a 60 calorie frozen yogurt bar fairly regularly and my husband and I by agreement plan regular cheat days at least once a week or every two weeks, usually something we really love (like Mellow Mushroom Pizza) and usually make off limits. If you are constantly denying yourself you will fail. If you strive to hit more than you miss, you're on your way to a healthy relationship with food. Something that was a long time coming for me. I went from anorexic in high school to obese as an adult. I am now on my way to healthy.0
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all things in moderation; I had Cajun food tonight. It was good. I don't regret it. It was heavy in calories true enough but I was able to exercise enough to keep it within balance. Denying yourself all good things will only result in a failure in the long term The time comes when you just have to not give in but learn MODERATION... that is a worthy goal...0
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I don't feel guilty about anything that fits into my calorie goals (and my vegan ethics!). I try to eat healthy foods first, as long as I've had plenty of fruit and veggies during the day, I fully savor any sweets and treats that I want to have!0
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