How can I get my Husband to get fit and be more active?

mrodriguez81
mrodriguez81 Posts: 61 Member
in Motivation and Support
His "almost" everyday after work routine is come home and sit on the couch and watch tv while I'm making dinner. Then we eat dinner, and then he goes back to the couch to watch more tv or play his PS3 while I'm cleaning up the kitchen. He will get off the couch maybe a couple of times and that's just to either get something to drink or bathroom. He rarely helps me with the kids or the house chores. But I really don't care if he does or doesn't. I have told him to go for a walk instead of playing and he will make excuses for that. I started to be more active and we both started seeing results and I keep telling him that it's not too hard to start working out. I have to beg him to come with us for a walk around the blocks but he is always too tired. I have told him that the only reason I try to make him be more active is because high blood pressure runs in his family and I want to decrease his chances and for me diabetes runs in my family so I have started to make changes. I only work-out on my lunch hour at work and I coach my son's soccer team. I try to put on a work-out video at home so we can both do it and like I said before he makes excuses. I don't know what else to do to motivate him to work-out or just go for walk. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Replies

  • stephyj528
    stephyj528 Posts: 93 Member
    thats so nice of you, there are many wives who completely agree with you, including me i agree 100% bc my husband is the same. the short and long of this is you can't. you cant make him do anything all you can do is live and let live and do this for yourself just make yourself happy. i believe soon enough itll kick in for him too and maybe in tiny small ways and things you may not notice at first.. goodluck let me know if u wanna talk :)
  • deb3129
    deb3129 Posts: 1,294 Member
    I have been struggling with this at my house also, so I can't help you but I do completely understand your frustration. My husband has weight related health issues and I am terrified for him, but I can't make him change. I have finally made peace with that and realized that he will have to want to make the changes.
  • dmg4867
    dmg4867 Posts: 14 Member
    "Honey, if you spent as much time power leveling your body as you do on your Skyrim hero, you would look like Solid Snake."
    That should do the trick. Just kidding, really though:

    Not everyone has aspirations to be athletic, so the idea of going for a walk or to the gym might seem like a huge annoying waste of de-stress or escape time to him. Maybe you can find him a physical outlet that is more like his idea of a good time?

    Martial arts would be a great activity for you, him, and the kids - its fun, video gamers typically love doing them, and you "accidentally" get in great shape along the way. Just a thought :)
  • Irish_eyes75
    Irish_eyes75 Posts: 475
    You can't. Just like nobody can make you get fit and be more active. If he wants to waste his life on the couch that's his choice, just don't let him stop you from reaching your goals!
  • mrodriguez81
    mrodriguez81 Posts: 61 Member
    And the kicker is that we have everything in a walking distance, the Y is only 1 block away, and adult dance studio 2 blocks, martial arts right next to the dance studio. I've even gotten games for the PS3 Move so he can at least get up but nope he just plays one game. I'm just going to give up and let him be, it stresses me more than what it does to him. I'm just going to let it go.
  • nickmast78
    nickmast78 Posts: 65
    Break his game and tell him to get his fata$$ off the couch or you are going to find another guy to bang!

    J/K. There is pretty much nothing you can do. Losing weight and getting healthy is a lifestyle change that some people just don't want for themselves.
  • 3laine75
    3laine75 Posts: 3,069 Member
    i think he needs to want to do that for himself - feed him healthy tho, on the fly :)
  • VogtAndrea
    VogtAndrea Posts: 236
    So far the answers have been right on the money. The only person you can completely make healthy choices for is yourself. Children might get 60 - 90% of the supply / demand met for them but they control what goes into their stomachs.
    You can suggest, invite, be an example to and can keep healthier choices where they can be seen and you can point out that he's missing out on spending time with you and getting healthier at the same time but that's where it stops unless you go the EVIL woman route. That doesn't work and can backfire on you.
  • Bazan101
    Bazan101 Posts: 19 Member
    lots and lots of horizontal polka
  • PhilyPhresh
    PhilyPhresh Posts: 600 Member
    Break his game and tell him to get his fata$$ off the couch or you are going to find another guy to bang!

    J/K. There is pretty much nothing you can do. Losing weight and getting healthy is a lifestyle change that some people just don't want for themselves.


    ^This

    I am sorry, but if you are being honest in all that you need to slap that guy around. It is total BS for a guy (and yeah, this is coming from a guy) to think they have no responsibility in life other than to go to work and play video games. “Get off your *kitten*!” is all that needs to be said. I cook breakfast every morning, cook lunch and dinner every other day, work full time, have two kids that I come home and take care of and let my wife GO OUT and do what she wants if she needs a “night off”, I work out for an hour to an hour and a half 4 times a week, I clean the kitchen and wash the dishes daily, and I still feel like my wife does too much of the work! I really am not trying to come off as mean but, seriously!? That guy needs a wake up call…
  • mrodriguez81
    mrodriguez81 Posts: 61 Member
    I do make healthy meals, sometimes I will make hamburgers or Brats but that's like once or maybe twice a month. But it doesn't matter if I make healthy meals because he will always go for seconds. I have made meals just enough for everyone to eat and no room for leftovers or seconds and he gets pissy about me not making enough food. I always tell him that there is either fruit or veggies cut up in the fridge. Good thing we don't have a habit of buying cookies, chips and soda. Otherwise he'd be on that.
  • ndearing0501
    ndearing0501 Posts: 145 Member
    "Honey, if you spent as much time power leveling your body as you do on your Skyrim hero, you would look like Solid Snake."

    Haha I should try this on my husband!
  • flslp87
    flslp87 Posts: 175 Member
    I am so glad that my DH runs and takes care of himself as this would be a bone of contention between us....so....

    You could tell him to grow up. the PS3 is for kids and he's an adult who needs to be a good role model for his kids...

    Or

    make him go to the doctor and have blood work and see what the doctor says and then have a good talk w/ him, esp if his blood work is out of whack...

    OR

    Tell him if he is going to have such a low opinion of himself and care so little about you and the kids then he better make sure his life insurance policy is paid up and that it is big enough to take care of you and the kids because continuing to treat himself the way he is, chances are he won't be around when you are old and gray...
  • indescribablesin
    indescribablesin Posts: 57
    My mom could never get my dad to do anything... I was the one who finally got him on MFP ;) When *I* said it I didn't even have to push. Try using the kids, maybe? Get them to nag him to go play baseball with them or something? It could be cruel if you don't do it right, so you'd have to be careful.

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