To Lie or Not to Lie?

FiercelyBeautiful
FiercelyBeautiful Posts: 590 Member
in Chit-Chat
I need some advice, if your significant other was saying and doing things at work that could put their job on the line would you be on their side and support them or love them enough and your kids enough to tell them what they are doing is wrong? I for one would not be able to live with myself if my husband gets himself fired when I could have talked some sense into how he is handling the situation. I don't care how out of line a superior is there is no excuse to use their bad behavior to justify your own. I am so frustrated and feel like I am in the dog house because I am not willing to sit idly by and be supportive of putting our only source of income in jepoardy. AHHHHHH

Replies

  • Rukadare
    Rukadare Posts: 101 Member
    Can you be a bit more specific? I mean..is what he doing so bad that he WILL get fired if the boss finds out?

    If it's something that could end his job, then you should say something and not be afraid to say it..Dunno why you wouldn't talk to him about it if it will help him out.
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
    Communication.
  • dougt333
    dougt333 Posts: 697
    One thing I love about my woman is her honestly, even if it's not what I want to hear.
  • drmerc
    drmerc Posts: 2,603 Member
    Does it involve hiding a body?
  • pstaceyca
    pstaceyca Posts: 306 Member
    I'd be honest so there are no regrets!! Good luck.
  • Cliffslosinit
    Cliffslosinit Posts: 5,044 Member
    Tell him how you feel. NOT that it will change anything...that way you can say "I told you so"!
  • simplydelish2
    simplydelish2 Posts: 726 Member
    If you can't talk to him about this...it sounds to me like there are deeper issues in your relationship. Instead of telling him what you think he should do...ask about what's going on, why he thinks this is the best behavior, has he considered this, that, and other behaviors.

    If his supervisor is completely out of line, it may mean a trip to HR.

    Good luck!
  • SofaKingRad
    SofaKingRad Posts: 1,592 Member
    Maybe you should seek divorce.
  • mamagooskie
    mamagooskie Posts: 2,964 Member
    I would totally say something......especially if it could affect the whole family/income etc.
  • jfrankic
    jfrankic Posts: 747 Member
    There are ways as a wife, that you can lovingly and respectfully express your concerns. Yes, you should definitely talk to him. He doesn't need another boss, so don't come at him from the "don't do this" angle, but one of concern about his actions and decisions will affect your family. I've been in a situation where my husband called me with the "hey, I'm home because I got fired today" conversation. Not fun, especially when you have kids. It sucks. Communicate. Communicate. Communicate.
  • xHelloQuincyx
    xHelloQuincyx Posts: 884 Member
    depends what your talking about.


    my SO has a b* of a boss.... when that boss wouldn't let a girl go to the hospital during her shift (she felt very ill) that was when i lost all respect for him. this boss has made 4 other people quit, and this puts more workload on his other employees. he is a horrible person, inside. i have seen my boyfriend (a grown man) cry when he knew he messed up and his boss would be mad. no one should hold that power over someone. no one should make someone cry at the thought of doing something a bit wrong. personally i wouldn't care if anything happened to him. *karma* can handle my problems with him, he has an f' load of pay back commin to him.

    i would DEFINITELY say something to my SO if what i believed he was doing was wrong, but hes not like that. i was the one who stood up to his boss in the end... prolly cuz i knew he wouldn't hurt a girl haha. he would rather be a door mat. un confrontational, and resistant to the 'payback urge' he makes me a better person too. maybe its time to grow up and learn and grow with each other. *queue serious talk music.
  • AJ_Pete
    AJ_Pete Posts: 863 Member
    My father does stuff like that all the time and continues throughout the warnings. I'm in HR and basically yell at him that they should fire him.

    You need to get on your husband's *kitten* about it. This affects your family and if he loses his job, what are you going to do? He needs to be put in his place. And you're the only person to do it before it's too late.

    I hope I answered the question. I didn't read the whole thing, haha. Too preoccupied with this deep fried twinkie.
  • FoRizzleB
    FoRizzleB Posts: 15
    One thing I love about my woman is her honestly, even if it's not what I want to hear.

    This!!!!
  • gpstrucker
    gpstrucker Posts: 930 Member
    Club him like a baby seal until he gets the point.
  • jennifer87402
    jennifer87402 Posts: 57 Member
    I think you should be able to talk and pray about it with him. Whatever it is God knows it and he knows your situation and he will show you the way to approach it. Its much healthier and better to talk it out than to stew.
    Love ya dear.
  • xLexa
    xLexa Posts: 482 Member
    Sometimes they just have to learn the hard way... and I am talking from experience. No matter how right they are, if someone doesn't like it they can always find a reason to get rid of them... Sometimes in a job situation people just have to learn to keep their mouths closed and look for something better.. and this is totally not the type of person I am, but we did learn the hard way so... Don't give up , tell him dear and hope it doesn't come to where we went to.
  • shirleygirl910
    shirleygirl910 Posts: 503 Member
    There are ways as a wife, that you can lovingly and respectfully express your concerns. Yes, you should definitely talk to him. He doesn't need another boss, so don't come at him from the "don't do this" angle, but one of concern about his actions and decisions will affect your family. I've been in a situation where my husband called me with the "hey, I'm home because I got fired today" conversation. Not fun, especially when you have kids. It sucks. Communicate. Communicate. Communicate.

    It's all in the way you say it. You can sound like you are supporting him when you are really telling him not to act that way. You can tell him how you feel with out putting him down or making him feel you too are against him. Husbands need to feel supported.
  • livinginwoods
    livinginwoods Posts: 562 Member
    Be honest now with him instead of becoming resentful later.
  • live2runnj
    live2runnj Posts: 157
    Honesty is always the best policy..........

    ...and I hate policy!

    Just LIE for Christ sakes!
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    I would absolutely let him know I think what he's doing is wrong! Being a supportive wife doesn't mean supporting something you find morally wrong or something that could jeopardize the family's life line. Speak up!

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