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"Advice" from the peanut gallery

itsrebec
itsrebec Posts: 38
edited December 2024 in Health and Weight Loss
When I was told that many of my medical issues were caused by food intolerances and had to go off all gluten, soy, dairy, aspartame caffeine, and eggs, I thought the weight would fly off of me.

It didn't.

My sister-in-law has been using this site since February and has had awesome results, so I figured I would try it out. I feel good and look forward to my first weigh in on Monday.

Like most people, I share my life on Facebook. I talk about my exercising, the food I eat, etc. Mostly, I get "you go, girl" and other positive feedback.

You would think the positive stuff would stay with me? Nope. I focus on the bad stuff.

"You're starving yourself."

'1200 calories is too little."

"Relax."

I'm so upset. I'm working so hard, recording everything I eat, exercising every day...

I know I should just not listen, but I can't help it. What am I doing wrong???

Replies

  • robin52077
    robin52077 Posts: 4,383 Member
    Nobody can properly respond without knowing your age, height, weight, goal weight, exercise routine, and see your food diary.

    Any responses without that info would just be wild guesses....
  • itsrebec
    itsrebec Posts: 38
    I'm not looking for them to give advice... and yet, it's still offered.
  • robin52077
    robin52077 Posts: 4,383 Member
    So what EXACTLY was the question about?
    What am I doing wrong???

    Sounds to me like you are ASKING people from the peanut gallery to give you advice here....

    No?
  • Barbellerella
    Barbellerella Posts: 1,838 Member
    I rarely post stuff about my fitness on FB, there is too many judgmental people on there and its really none of their business.
  • ProjFit
    ProjFit Posts: 143
    I admire your ability to talk about these things on facebook. I dont have those kind of facebook friends. If I posted my diet and openly talked about my struggles.. I would most likely get 100% negative comments, or none at all. My family knows I have different eating habits and having a bipolar mom who was always against me losing weight It can be really hard sometimes when she sees me eating a salad instead of a hamburger. MFP is the only place I am comfortable talking about my lifestyle changes and whats going on in my life. Its the only place I have said how much I weight and how much Id like to lose. My advice to you, is to not let it get to you so much.. I know thats easier said than done.. but there are people out there that dont even get the positive comments at all.
  • Usa9872001
    Usa9872001 Posts: 27 Member
    I understand. It's hard to weed through all the crap. I run marathons. My family definitely doesn't understand. Unfortunately, the negative feedback comes right along with the positive. Either decide to learn how to filter it or quit FB posting and come here. Hang in there.
  • Be more selective with the people you share your life with.....or toughen up. I had to completely delete my Facebook or else I would have had 0 friends because I didn't handle the negativity thrown at me.
  • Jules2Be
    Jules2Be Posts: 2,238 Member
    I'm not looking for them to give advice... and yet, it's still offered.

    because you are posting about it?
  • amersmanders
    amersmanders Posts: 118 Member
    If you're not seeing the scale moving, but you're making wise eating and exercise choices, maybe shift your focus to the non-scale victories- do you notice positive effects from feeding your body what it needs? Are you clothes fitting looser? Do you have more energy? Do you feel better overall? Sometimes, the scale is just stubborn, but you can see the efforts of your work reflected in other areas.
  • I post things on fb, not to enquire for advice, but because other people in my list like to share stuff.
    There was one rather vocal "friend" who i've known virtually for years and years. She took offence one day when I said I didn't need unsolicited advice on my diet. She took offence and blocked me, and I have to say, since then, things have been peaceful. Stand your ground. Tell people who comment that it's your body and your learning curve. People often criticise, especially when they hope their answers are the right ones
  • AJ_Pete
    AJ_Pete Posts: 863 Member
    When I was told that many of my medical issues were caused by food intolerances and had to go off all gluten, soy, dairy, aspartame caffeine, and eggs, I thought the weight would fly off of me.

    It didn't.

    My sister-in-law has been using this site since February and has had awesome results, so I figured I would try it out. I feel good and look forward to my first weigh in on Monday.

    Like most people, I share my life on Facebook. I talk about my exercising, the food I eat, etc. Mostly, I get "you go, girl" and other positive feedback.

    You would think the positive stuff would stay with me? Nope. I focus on the bad stuff.

    "You're starving yourself."

    '1200 calories is too little."

    "Relax."

    I'm so upset. I'm working so hard, recording everything I eat, exercising every day...

    I know I should just not listen, but I can't help it. What am I doing wrong???

    I would assume that you're programmed to focus on only the negative. Once you really start feeling great about your progress, the people who are negative won't even matter. Do what works for you and love yourself. Screw everyone else.
  • beccarockslife
    beccarockslife Posts: 816 Member
    Have you considered they might be right? And you just aren't ready to admit it to yourself yet?
  • Beastette
    Beastette Posts: 1,497 Member
    What am I doing wrong???

    Answer:
    1. Focusing on only the negatives.
    2. Listening to advice with no intention of changing your behavior. If you like what you're doing, why are you even attending?
    3. Choosing to be butthurt when you don't have to be. Other options include finding the humor in the situation or telling them to shove it up their pooper.
    4. Asking for more advice.

    First time's free. Next time, it will cost you.

    Good luck on your journey!
  • nxd10
    nxd10 Posts: 4,572 Member
    When I was told that many of my medical issues were caused by food intolerances and had to go off all gluten, soy, dairy, aspartame caffeine, and eggs, I thought the weight would fly off of me.

    It didn't.

    My sister-in-law has been using this site since February and has had awesome results, so I figured I would try it out. I feel good and look forward to my first weigh in on Monday.

    Like most people, I share my life on Facebook. I talk about my exercising, the food I eat, etc. Mostly, I get "you go, girl" and other positive feedback.

    You would think the positive stuff would stay with me? Nope. I focus on the bad stuff.

    "You're starving yourself."

    '1200 calories is too little."

    "Relax."

    I'm so upset. I'm working so hard, recording everything I eat, exercising every day...

    I know I should just not listen, but I can't help it. What am I doing wrong???

    Listening to people who say bad things to you instead of ones who are supportive. It really is all you're doing wrong. And that has nothing to do with dieting.
  • mmapags
    mmapags Posts: 8,934 Member
    IMHO, the mistake was liking to FB. That just invites the commentary. Just keep it to yourself and do what you want to do. Are you doing it because you think it's the right thing to do and you've decided to or do you need the approval of others. I don't tell and I don't welcome unsolicited input.
This discussion has been closed.