What the newbie should know

Great information! I'm a newbie on MFP and am I excited about becoming a member of the community. Supporting each other on the way of meeting our goals of heatlhy living. :bigsmile:

I am super active on MFP and love all my friends. I found that when I add people that are new to the site it takes them a little while to understand MFP etiquette while making new friends. I hope I don't come off as too pushy! haha

1. Fill out your profile. If you haven't taken the time to tell me about yourself people are less likely to become your friend. We don't know anything about you and if you haven't taken the time to tell us who you are, what makes us think your going to take the time to be active on this site?

2. Put a profile picture in. Even if its an avatar, don't leave it blank. I prefer to see your face because it shows your being accountable for where you are in your journey but I understand if people don't want to put it up there because of security reasons too.

3. If your photo is all boobs, butts, thongs and/or groin, I am not going to be friends with you. This website is about fitness, not about how much attention you can get. It has nothing to do with "I love my body now I wanna show it off". Great, take a pic in a tasteful bikini or workout clothes. Skin is not the problem, the problem is the poses and attitude in which the picture is taken.

4. If your the type of person who trolls profiles to see who you can hook up with-even married people, go away. Get a life.

5. Write on your friends statuses and be supportive. Expecting others to support you without giving anything back makes us think you are the type of person who thinks they are "entitled" to it. I have said it 100 times and will say it again, I am not your Momma and the only satisfaction I need is to see you succeed without getting anything in return.

6. Don't be a negative Nancy. Its one thing to have a bad day and ask for support but if you complain every single day, people are going to get sick of you bringing them down.

7. This is your journey and you need to take responsibility for it. No one is going to do this for you. If you are the type of person who blames other for your slip ups saying stuff like "I binged tonight because no one commented on my status" or basing your willpower on others support, well that's not going to work. Your making the choice to eat that brownie, not us.

8. If your going to friend someone, write something in the message! Why do you wanna be their friend? Where did you see their profile? Are you friends with any of their current friends? The problem with blank messages is that it makes us think your a troll or trying to sell us something. The only time I see this as okay is in the "Intro group" if you have already commented on the thread.

9. Do not only come online to raise money for your race/walk/whatever or try to sell us something.

10. If you don't have experience, don't pretend to know what your taking about. Telling a veteran of MFP who has been very successful what they are doing right/doing wrong when you haven't any experience, well, that's not going to make for a happy friend. I don't think most vets expect you to worship them or anything, or even listen to them... they do expect respect for their successes and the time they put in to achieve them. It invalidates their hard work.

11. Finally, Be nice! If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all. Support your friends! Have fun! Open up! This website can build some amazing friendships if you let it. I have friends on here that I talk to every day for years now. You can too.

sorry to edit

You have to add....12. Don't ask stupid questions. There are such a thing as a stupid question and if you ask one you will most likely be ridiculed.
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# Jacwhite22 Just to make one a comment to your reply..

As Jacwhite just demonstated...There are so very egotistical and arrogant individuals on MFP. Who have the mindset that
"I think I am better than you"!!!

The correct statement is that There are never ANY Stupid questions. There are so many who have never had the knowledge or behaviors to lived a "Healthier LifeStyle".
Like my profile states (example below) "The purpose of a MFP friendship is to help educate others who are unaware of a healthier lifestyle"


Great job & Very Nicely done LCT!

Thanks all of you for sharing ALL of this advice!

Bump this to save for later!



I have posted the following at the top of my profile. This is how I articulated what you basically said in your advice.


From VirtuousVal's Profile:

♥♥♥ PLEASE TAKE NOTE ♥♥♥

♦♦♦♦♦Please add a message when sending a Friend Request, Thanks!

♦♦♦♦ Please introduce yourself and take a moment tell me why you would like to become MFP Friends.

♦♦♦ I will not post my MFP Friendship expectations or my rules on my profile. For it may seem to be unfair or judgmental.
I do have a MFP friendship philosophy that is it common sense to most mature adults to comprehend, simply put to
"Reciprocate" the basics of respect, motivation, inspiration, encouragement and the purpose of a MFP friendship is to
help educate others who are unaware of a healthier lifestyle. Most of all, "CELEBRATE" one another’s goals achieved &
successes.

♦♦ This is an ALL Gurlz-Peepz Zone for me. Any MFP Male Friend request on a case by case basis. I respect & honor My
Husband and my commitment to my marriage.

Best wishes to all of the Newbies on MFP.

Valarie aka VirtuousVal
[/quote]

I'm fairly certain he was referring to the repetitive questions that can be avoided by either googling or searching the topics in the forums. Or how about the people who ask about how to lose 20lbs in a week? I'D CALL THAT FAIRLY STUPID. I agree that this is supposed to be a supportive community, but at times, the forum questions can seem redundant at best and that's when the ridicule starts. And strangely, the some of the snarkiest people on the forums are some of the most supportive people on my friend list.

You've said it all really...agree with you totally xx

While I agree with a lot of what the OP is saying, I can't get over the arrogance on here. You really don't get to tell me how to use MFP.

How about this: maybe you "veterans" should stop thinking you're God's gift to MFP and start ignoring "stupid" questions, people with blank profiles and friend requests with no message.
It's really that easy!

You have to add....12. Don't ask stupid questions. There are such a thing as a stupid question and if you ask one you will most likely be ridiculed.

# Jacwhite22 Just to make a comment to your reply..

As Jacwhite just demonstated...There are some very narcissistic, egotistical and arrogant
individuals on MFP. Who have the mindset that "I think I am better than you!!! " just ignore them
or report them to MFP staff for inappropriate behavior that violates the Terms of Service of this site.

The correct statement is that There are never ANY Stupid questions. There are so many who have
never had the knowledge or behaviors on how to live a "Healthier LifeStyle".

Like my profile states (example below) "The purpose of a MFP friendship is to help educate others who are
unaware of what a healthier lifestyle" requires.

Thank you Lect for your post! Great job & Very Nicely done Lect!

Thanks all of you for sharing ALL of this advice!

I love how from my comment you have already judged me as narcissistic, judgmental and arrogant. You are probably right....but that's neither here nor there. If you really believe there are no stupid questions you haven't paid attention in the forums much.The forums have a search feature. It's amazing. There is also some common sense that should be used. I am not going to use examples here because I am not looking to call people out.......I'm not doing that here.......But there are definitely stupid threads. All I was trying to say was to at least think for a minute about what you are asking before you post it. If I posted......"What food can I eat that will allow me to grow wings and fly like an eagle?" Would you take that seriously or consider it a stupid question?

#Jacwhite22 As you stated in your reply….verbatim it said You have to add....12. Don't ask stupid questions. “There are” such a thing as a “stupid question” and if you ask one you will most likely be ridiculed. I know ppl ask “Stupid” questions. Especially when they are trying to be funny and draw attention to themselves. Because they do not have nothing better to do.
They need to get a life. So they wanna bug someone and irritated ppl. That would be annoying! It would be a “TRULY STUPID QUESTION. I am not saying that there are not someone ppl who will ask ‘STUPID QUESTIONS” and they jump and make a sarcastic questions that deserves a “STUPID ANSWER”. Then yes I could see them being ridiculed!
I See that you were coming from a place that a lot of ppl joke around and make “STUPID comments or ask STUPID Questions”. I do believe that ppl can ask a “STUPID” question.
As the FAMOUS saying goes “STUPID IS AS STUPID DOES”

***OK we should be on the same page now……

Fact #1) SUBJECT OF THE TOPIC: Was To give advice and provide the information for Newbies to help them in the regards to understanding the appropriate MFP etiquette while making new friends on MFP and the appropriate MFP etiquette when sending an a MFP Friend request. To show How Newbies should create and personalize their MFP profile and increase the chances of making friends on MFP with the MFP Friend request that they send to prospective new MFP friends.

***AGREED! Your were trying to add your two cents worth to the advice/ information the OP posted. That is not the same subject matter.


Fact #2) As you stated in your reply….verbatim it said You have to add....12. Don't ask stupid questions. “There are” such a thing as a “stupid question” and if you ask one you will most likely be ridiculed.
Your comment did not apply to the subject matter. Your response to was in regards to ppl “ASKING STUPID QUESTIONS” not Proper etiquette to make new friends on MFP and create your MFP profile.
You were to trying to get attention drawn to yourself and to add your sarcastic, disrespectful comment if someone asks a stupid question repetitively. So it will cause them to be ridiculed for asking the question.

***AGREED! I’m I not correct!?!

***OKAY WITH ALL JOKING OR KIDDING ASIDE:
Being a Virtuous Woman and of sound mind and body. I am such a “SERIOUS” person.

Fact #3) My point or comment to your reply: was to comment to your reply to the OP Newbie list of “Appropriate MFP etiquette” .
If someone had a TRULY valid question that they do not understand and are repetitively asking the same questions. If it is truly, a valid question with all joking or kidding aside. It is “IN” the delivery and context of the question being asked. CORRECT!!!
The person asking a valid question. Is obviously that they are is a misunderstanding on the part of the individual asking the question. The are confused or need clarification or an “IN-DEPTH THROUGHOUGH ANSWER” that they were originally given. It is still confusing to them SO they keep asking the question repetitively to get clarification. The individual should be “ENTITLED” to ask for clarification to understand what they were being educated about. They should not be RIDICULED for asking for more clarification!!

***That was my point of view when I read your response.

Fact #3) From my point of view or perspective: When I read your reply, I responded that the question that someone would be asking was a “SERIOUS QUESTION” SO, I took your reply as “narcissistic, judgmental and arrogant”. Because of how your delivery and intentions of making a comment and how you wrote to a topic that was not applicable to the subject matter. From a new person view point, If they are being serious. “WHICH I AM A VERY SERIOUS PERSON”…. YES! you portrayed yourself as “narcissistic, judgmental and arrogant”.

***AGREED! I did judge you! If I offended you I apologize!

I do have COMMON SENSE! And I am proud of it and wear it proudly!
There are way too many ppl who lack that characteristic. Being of sound mind and body. I am such a “SERIOUS” person. I don’t ask stupid questions. I stick to the topic at hand. I have enough common sense. I am NOT to be one of those ppl who ask “STUPID’ questions.

We were both coming from a different perspective to whether the question being asked by an individual was in a serious or joking/sarcastic or STUPID QUESTION and different point of views/ standpoint.
YES! To your statement I do NOT pay attention in the forums. I only go into the forums for a purpose and find my answer to a question or to educate myself.

Would you take that seriously or consider it a stupid question? "What food can I eat that will allow me to grow wings and fly like an eagle?"

My answer is “YES” that is a serious question.

My question for you is ….
How does asking a “STUPID” Question. APPLY TO THE SUBJECT OF THE TOPIC? I do not see any where that asking a question whether stupid or serious applies to appropriate etiquette.

The topic contained the following advice.
What is the APPROPRIATE ETIQUETTE of a newbie on while making new friends on MFP.

1. Fill out your profile.
2. MFP and providing tips to create a profile and put a profile picture.
3. What is considered an appropriate profile picture.
4. Rules for ppl trying to hook up or find someone to marry.
5. Reciprocate to your friends.
6. Don’t wine or be negative.
7. Be responsible for your own journey don’t blame others for your slip ups.
8. How to send a MFP Friend request; Attaching a message to introduce yourself. Why you wanna be they’re MFP friend. To
mention in a message if you have mutual friends? Explains to a newbie why it is rude to send a blind MFP friend request.
9. Do not come online to solicit money.
10. Don’t pretend to be a kind of person who knows it all and insult experienced veteran MFP’s. Respect others who are more
experienced.
11. BE NICE! BE RESPECTFUL OF OTHERS. TREAT OTHERS THE WAY YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE TREATED. Have Fun!

I'm a newcomer to myfitnesspal.com and I have read the community guidelines for the message boards. I'm glad to be joining you on the road to weight loss success. I'll be helping you and giving you advice on how well are you doing with your diet and exercise. I'm really going to like this site and I'm learning whatever it is that I have learned during the last year.

I am a newbie....and very excited to be part of this site. I look forward to taking advantage of the great things it has to offer...
By your post.....I venture to guess......you have had a few negative experiences with knuckleheads, eh? WOW
My picture (fairly cute head shot) has been posted...I think my profile is complete....I think I am off to a good start....I am sure I will mess up a few times along the way, I hope I don't spend too much time in FFP detention. LOL

I am just so happy I found this site/app! I look forward to meeting a bunch of great people.....The one time where being a LOSER is a good thing.

KravMark....Happy to oblige! Sitting here listening to the near deafening locusts outside got my creative juices flowing!!!

I'm relatively new to the site so thanks very much for the great advice! Much appreciated

This seems a little arrogant. I understand that the OP is obviously annoyed but still. Not everyone agrees with these rules.

I did just rejoin MFP today but I was on it a few years ago and it seems people were a lot friendlier back then. I remember a lot of the people who are success stories now on the main log in page. They added newbies all the time and they were nice to them.This was before the site looked like facebook. There were no statuses to comment on. All we had was profiles and message boards.

I will initially add who ever requests me. I figure if they took the step of joining MFP than they're good in my book. We're all trying to get healthy and judging people by their pictures or their profile just isn't right. I find it awkward to write something when I request a friend. Sometimes, I'm just looking for someone that's nice enough to support me on this journey and I don't really have a specific reason why I want to add you.

Honestly, I find it ridiculous that some of the women on this site won't add men just because they're men. I understand that you're married but most of them probably aren't interested in hitting on you. They're probably just looking for support in their weight loss. If they try something then block them, but why judge someone before you even know them?

If you'd like to be my friend I will accept you no matter what race/sex/sexuality or anything else you are. I'll even accept you if you don't have a profile picture. This is a fitness support site and I'd like all the support I can get, no matter who it's coming from.