Took a break, and now the family is so clingy

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Joy2hymn
Joy2hymn Posts: 16
in Fitness and Exercise
Well, my husband and I bought a home. I took a break for about 2 months. I had to get the house in order, paint, unbox, order appliances, and of course I was slapped with a law suit for 13K in supposed damages in a past car accident. I won, anyways. I put on some weight like I knew I would. We ate out a lot, while we waited for the oven to be sent, hooked up, and while I juggled work, home, and husband. I announced to my husband and my son, that I was going back to work, and back to my 2 hours at the gym. My family is now in a crazed b*tchy tude. How do I let my family know, that since the chaos has settled I need my old life back. I lost a lot of weight and the more time I take from my usual routine, the more I gain back. I weighed 180 in January I was down to 159 and now I am back to 167. I need my family to understand that I love them oh so much, but I want to be happy and my son is bitter that he won't be snuggeling in the bed with, hubby is pissed I'm not cooking like a fat *kitten* anymore. I don't want to be ugly to my husband, but I can't take it anylonger. I sacrafice way to much for them to not give me a chance to do what makes me happy!

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  • Ready2Rock206
    Ready2Rock206 Posts: 9,488 Member
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    2 hours at the gym? That's a lot. On top of working full time - when would you even see your family? I can't blame them. How old is the son that won't have a mommy around anymore? I understand needing time for you, but maybe you can find a balance where you see your family and have time for you.
  • Joy2hymn
    Joy2hymn Posts: 16
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    I should note I work from home full time. But I keep to myself a lot when I am home. I make breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I put him down for his naps and play with him in our yard. The other times he is with a nanny. Our schedule is like this. 7Am, breakfast. I leave the house at 7:30am to go to the gym, home at 9:45. I work from 10am till 1pm. I make lunch, share lunch with him. Watch a movie and put him down for a nap. 3 till 5 I work. At 5 I go outside and play with him till 6pm. Come in, make dinner. Share dinner with them and bathe my son and put him down. And from 9 till 12 I work. And start all over. My husband sees my son less than I do. But my job doesn't require any schedule. but in order to be paid for full time I have to put in 8 hours. I like going to the gym 30 minutes early for my class, because I like to exercise, walk, and just clear my head and think. I love my son to death, but he is starting school soon, so while he is at school I won't have to do a break up of my schedule. I can really get it all done before he gets home. But I break up my schedule, so that I can be there. I have been part time for over a year. So every milestone I was there for it. I just dont see how 2 hours a day is asking for to much especially when I want to teach my son the importance of a good diet and exercise.
  • momto1g1b
    momto1g1b Posts: 118 Member
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    Which part is your hubby most upset about? I'm guessing he would like to see more of you after your put your son down for the night, but it sounds like that will be resolved once he goes to school and you can get all of your work done during the day. As for your husband being upset about the healthy meals you're preparing, can you make healthier versions of his favorite meals? There are so many yummy and healthy recipes out there that I'm sure if you look at them together you can find a lot of dinners that he would love.
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
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    I think 2 hours a day for a working parent is excessive. Surely you can find a 1-hour-a-day routine that will suffice. You also need to teach your son that family is a priority... that he is important to you... that your husband is important to you. He will grow up seeing and knowing what is most important to you by your actions. He is preschool age... you are his world. It must be hard for him to see you at home and not have you accessible to him.
  • jerbear1962
    jerbear1962 Posts: 1,157 Member
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    I'm in the process of starting a Work at Home job and know that having my workout time will be important to me. Do what you need.
  • Kirkajuice
    Kirkajuice Posts: 311 Member
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    It's not excessive, in those two hours you go to the gym, do the class, presumably shower and dress, then get back home. It isn't unreasonable, it's impressive you can get that done in the two hours. If your husband doesn't like your cooking, let him cook for himself until he stops whingeing about it.
  • lyndall5311
    lyndall5311 Posts: 146 Member
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    I really dont see anything wrong with what you are doing.

    I also work from home and 2 of my 3 children are at home with me as well, I also go to the gym for 1.5hrs a day.

    I think its important that you teach your children independence, you probably see your child more than what you would if you were working full time out of the house.

    I say do what works for you and its just something that your husband will have to get used to again (I assume that he was fine with it prior to you moving house?).

    :smile:
  • kingofcrunk
    kingofcrunk Posts: 372 Member
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    They're probably unhappy at the moment because most people hate change (myself included!) - I'm sure if you get back into your old routine they'll get used to it and everyone will be happy again.

    You're doing a great job juggling all that!
  • mirandamayhem
    mirandamayhem Posts: 772
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    If it worked before it will work again.
    Maybe try and break them in gently, but you have to be happy in yourself.
    What's the saying?" "Mamma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!"?
    You have the best of both worlds being able to work from home and be there for your son, and so that time away is going to be precious.
    Keep going.
  • shivles
    shivles Posts: 468 Member
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    I can't see anything wrong either, I know your husband would probably like to be spending the evening with you but as others said that will be resolved soon. As for cooking, if he doesn't like it let him cook his own meal!

    Come september I'll be in a similar situation, college, work, small child and household to run plus my workouts so I can empathise. I don't think men realise how important it is to be you and not just 'mum'
  • TropicalFlowerz
    TropicalFlowerz Posts: 1,990 Member
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    THIS IS JUST MY 2CENTS: YES U NEED "YOU TIME" I'M A MOM I GET IT,~BUT IT'S ALL ABOUT BALANCE. GIVE YURSELF SAY AN HOUR /DAY OF WRKIN OUT AND 30 MINS OF PEACE AND QUIET(MAYBE THAT MEANS WAKING UP A LITTLE EARLIER) I GET UP EARLY AND HAV MY COFFE ON THE FRONT PORCH,READ,PRAY,TO START MY DAY)...WHATEVER FLOATS YUR BOAT.AND CHANGE IS HARD FOR MOST,BUT USING BALANCE TRY ONE DAY /WEEK TAKE YUR CHILD FOR A WALK W/ YOU AND ONCE A WEEK MAKE AN OOOOHY-GOOOY DISH FOR HUBBY,AFTERALL HE'S NOT THE ONE TRYING TO GET FIT.BALANCE THATS ALL IT'S WRK IN PROGRESS YOU'LL GET IT!!

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