*Waves* Shyly from Wisconsin

Smiling_Sara
Smiling_Sara Posts: 203 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hey everyone. So, I thought I would formally introduce myself. My name is Sara, and I am 33 years old. Started my new journey of health in 2007 starting at 278 pounds. I got down to 185, and felt awesome, I also got stuck there for almost a year, while still counting calories and working out. Two things happened then. I started to get attention that I never had before, and it sacred me, like really really scared me. (Social Anxiety sufferer ) and I was sick of saying no to pizza and ice cream when I still wasn't losing weight, so I started saying yes again. Over the next year, I gained back roughly 30 pounds. So here I am, back in the 2-teens.

I must get my weight under control, I must get my social anxiety under control. I need to not be scared of attention, and know that I can say no to someone whenever I feel the need to ( which is another issue I deal with-I hate letting anyone down, for any reason ) Most of the time, I feel very alone with how I am feeling, and not sure how to handle the emotions they come with.


Anyway, I look forward to getting to know you all, and posting with you, and getting my life back on track, and it staying there....forever. Thanks for reading.

~Sara

PS...Anyone else from Wisconsin?

Replies

  • bohonomad
    bohonomad Posts: 171 Member
    I totally get where you're coming from, I was always fat and got down to 170 only to gain weight and get fatter than ever, I've lost it all and am thinner than I was before (only be 3 pounds, but hey its something). You can do it!!! Add me :)
  • ivan1964
    ivan1964 Posts: 435
    Hello Sara and welcome here. You can do anything you put your mind too. I hope you have a great day and feel free to add me if you wish. :smile:
  • thewang
    thewang Posts: 71 Member
    I'm from MN - Feel free to add me!
  • gseburn
    gseburn Posts: 456 Member
    Welcome, Sara. All the best in reaching your goals!
  • Kerilynnda
    Kerilynnda Posts: 129 Member
    Welcome! I'm from WI also - feel free to add me if you'd like! Good luck on your journey! :flowerforyou:
  • LilBritGettinFit
    LilBritGettinFit Posts: 106 Member
    Hi there! I am from WI also :) Add me if you like. Good luck!
  • aaeros
    aaeros Posts: 157
    I haven't had a pizza craving in a while but it hit me hard Sunday. I guess I was fortunate that the 2 pizza places we stopped at were closed! LOL

    Anyway, welcome aboard and feel free to add me.
  • aholly70
    aholly70 Posts: 577 Member
    HI Sara,This is a great site,and yes i'm from Wisconsin I live in Ripon,Feel free to add me.
  • Smiling_Sara
    Smiling_Sara Posts: 203 Member
    Thank you all for such a warm welcome. It's comforting.

    I know how to lose weight, I've done it. The problem lies in when I was at my smallest adult weight I still felt as big as ever, and I was uncomfortable with the attention it got me. I'm not sure how to handle that. I want to be heatlhy more than anything.
  • 76wendyful
    76wendyful Posts: 202
    I live in Wisconsin! Feel free to add me! I am in the yo-yo rutt too! We can help each other get out of it once and for all! :wink:
  • pdj1220
    pdj1220 Posts: 175
    Hi Sara,
    I'm from Wisconsin too. Feel free to add me.
  • Im_NotPerfect
    Im_NotPerfect Posts: 2,181 Member
    Hello fellow Cheesehead! :) I hear you on getting tired of saying "NO". That's why I don't anymore. I just moderate how OFTEN I say "yes"! :)
  • ciaobellaxo
    ciaobellaxo Posts: 52
    I'm from Wisconsin too (: Feel free to add me! Anybody watching the Packers crush the Chargers tonight?
  • julesassid
    julesassid Posts: 49
    Thank you all for such a warm welcome. It's comforting.

    I know how to lose weight, I've done it. The problem lies in when I was at my smallest adult weight I still felt as big as ever, and I was uncomfortable with the attention it got me. I'm not sure how to handle that. I want to be heatlhy more than anything.

    What kind of attention was making you uncomfortable? I think it's hard when so many people start to comment about "How great you look now", it makes me feel like "how horrible did I look before?" and that makes me sad and uncomfortable too. But, it's the truth and, for me anyway, it's time to accept the truth and keep going.
    I wish you luck in overcoming your anxiety, and just focusing on you, and what makes you truly happy.
  • sunshine_gem
    sunshine_gem Posts: 390 Member
    Hey, it sounds like your problem is more psychological than anything else. I lost about 60lbs a couple of years ago and then put it all back on (and then some) within 6 months. I have a problem in that something happened to me when I was a child so I kept myself fat and overweight to keep myself 'safe' from attention. When I lost it, I started getting a lot more attention so I freaked out and put it all back on (with the help of some very unhelpful medication). It's really hard to come to terms with the fact that being thinner will get you more attention. The way I'm trying to combat it is by looking at pictures of myself when I was smaller and asking myself what I liked about them. I really liked the way my face looked and my waist. I just take it step by step and I figure eventually I'll love myself a bit more and I'll want to be smaller and won't freak out. I would also suggest some form of therapy to find out why you're so worried about getting attention. If you know why you don't like it that can help to work through it. I hope any of this made sense and it's helpful! Good luck to you. You can do it!
  • dieseldan1956
    dieseldan1956 Posts: 10 Member
    Hi Sarah, Milwaukee here, add me if you want
  • megsi474
    megsi474 Posts: 370 Member
    Welcome, and best wishes on your journey to loving yourself and being comfortable in your own skin.
  • katiedid1226
    katiedid1226 Posts: 231 Member
    Hello! Here to help you along the way (I need help, too!)

    I'm also from Wisconsin - I'll add you!

    Open invite to all of you - Feel free to add me!

    Katie
  • winterdancer
    winterdancer Posts: 89
    Hi Sarah its nice to meet you. I really relate to your story. would love to add you as my friend.

    @Katiedid that is one of my nicknames too
  • Smiling_Sara
    Smiling_Sara Posts: 203 Member
    Thank you all for such a warm welcome. It's comforting.

    I know how to lose weight, I've done it. The problem lies in when I was at my smallest adult weight I still felt as big as ever, and I was uncomfortable with the attention it got me. I'm not sure how to handle that. I want to be heatlhy more than anything.

    What kind of attention was making you uncomfortable? I think it's hard when so many people start to comment about "How great you look now", it makes me feel like "how horrible did I look before?" and that makes me sad and uncomfortable too. But, it's the truth and, for me anyway, it's time to accept the truth and keep going.
    I wish you luck in overcoming your anxiety, and just focusing on you, and what makes you truly happy.

    It's embarrasing to admit, but attention from men. Growing up all through my teen years and 20's, I was the overweight friend, never a girlfriend. I guess I got so use to being THAT person that when I started to get attention of the other nature it scared me. I don't see what they see. I don't think I'm un-attractive, but being the friend for all my adult life, I guess now when someone asks me out, the first thought that comes to my mind is "really? "me?" And like I said, it's not that I don't think I"m beautiful, it's just hard to sway from almost 20 years of having men not pay much attention to me. How does one change that?

    I also don't go out much. I'm very happy to stay at home with a good book, or tv series. Being out with groups of people give me that anxiety feeling. I'm much better in smaller groups-one on one or a couple of people. Get me into a bar scene or party, and I want to find the closest coner.
  • Smiling_Sara
    Smiling_Sara Posts: 203 Member
    Hey, it sounds like your problem is more psychological than anything else. I lost about 60lbs a couple of years ago and then put it all back on (and then some) within 6 months. I have a problem in that something happened to me when I was a child so I kept myself fat and overweight to keep myself 'safe' from attention. When I lost it, I started getting a lot more attention so I freaked out and put it all back on (with the help of some very unhelpful medication). It's really hard to come to terms with the fact that being thinner will get you more attention. The way I'm trying to combat it is by looking at pictures of myself when I was smaller and asking myself what I liked about them. I really liked the way my face looked and my waist. I just take it step by step and I figure eventually I'll love myself a bit more and I'll want to be smaller and won't freak out. I would also suggest some form of therapy to find out why you're so worried about getting attention. If you know why you don't like it that can help to work through it. I hope any of this made sense and it's helpful! Good luck to you. You can do it!

    I'm sure it is as well. I lost 94 pounds, and have been slowly gaining back over the past two years ( about 30 pounds ) I can't pinpoint anything happening to me when I was younger. The only thing that came to mind a few months back while thinking what may of caused this way of thinking was when I was in the 5th grade I was at a movie, and an older boy sat next to me and put his arm around me and brushed my breast. So, 5th grade, I was...12ish? I just remembered thinking it would be rude to cause a scene ( co-dependent much? )

    I have thought about therapy, but like most thing of the unknown, I have anxiety about talking with someone about what I have in my head.
  • dewdrops4life
    dewdrops4life Posts: 17
    Wisconsin here, too! Wow, so many Wisconsinites.. I am new here, just started yesterday. Feel free to add me :)
  • sunshine_gem
    sunshine_gem Posts: 390 Member
    Hey, it sounds like your problem is more psychological than anything else. I lost about 60lbs a couple of years ago and then put it all back on (and then some) within 6 months. I have a problem in that something happened to me when I was a child so I kept myself fat and overweight to keep myself 'safe' from attention. When I lost it, I started getting a lot more attention so I freaked out and put it all back on (with the help of some very unhelpful medication). It's really hard to come to terms with the fact that being thinner will get you more attention. The way I'm trying to combat it is by looking at pictures of myself when I was smaller and asking myself what I liked about them. I really liked the way my face looked and my waist. I just take it step by step and I figure eventually I'll love myself a bit more and I'll want to be smaller and won't freak out. I would also suggest some form of therapy to find out why you're so worried about getting attention. If you know why you don't like it that can help to work through it. I hope any of this made sense and it's helpful! Good luck to you. You can do it!

    I'm sure it is as well. I lost 94 pounds, and have been slowly gaining back over the past two years ( about 30 pounds ) I can't pinpoint anything happening to me when I was younger. The only thing that came to mind a few months back while thinking what may of caused this way of thinking was when I was in the 5th grade I was at a movie, and an older boy sat next to me and put his arm around me and brushed my breast. So, 5th grade, I was...12ish? I just remembered thinking it would be rude to cause a scene ( co-dependent much? )

    I have thought about therapy, but like most thing of the unknown, I have anxiety about talking with someone about what I have in my head.

    I can completely understand the anxiety of talking to someone but therapists/counsellors get that and will do everything they can to make you comfortable. Is there maybe a helpline you can call? Sometimes it's easier to talk on the phone when you can't see the person. The reason may also not be sinister. It could be absolutely anything. It might just be your personality to be shy/anxious. A good therapist will be able to give you the tools to help yourself. Hopefully you can learn to see that you deserve to be fit and healthy and whatever you want to be. If you have any questions then feel free to send me a message.

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