Has anyone you trusted given you terrible advice?

silver_arrow3
silver_arrow3 Posts: 1,373 Member
in Motivation and Support
A month or so ago I went to the doctor for a routine well-woman exam. I had gone there with the intention of asking for some advice or even some help - I have hormonal issues that I'm currently on medication for, but I have read several articles about doctors prescribing Metformin or Thiazolidinediones for women with these issues. At the time I had been working out for just under two months and I had weighed in a full ten pounds less than my starting weight just that morning. When my doctor (finally) came into the room, he asked if there was anything going on in my life that he should know about, so I told him that I was endeavoring to lose weight.

His response? "Good luck," but in a snide, "good luck with that" kind of way.

Stunned into silence by my doctor's brazen douchebaggery, I listened to the garbage that continued to flow out of his mouth. In an effort to encourage(?) me, he told me that he has patients who can drop 15 pounds in a month, but that I would never be like that. In fact, those women will never have to work as hard as I will in order to lose weight. He told me that physical or emotional trauma would make me lose weight, like a car accident or being stranded on a deserted island or (wait for it) being put in a concentration camp. Then he proceeded to tell me that I needed to go to the gym and while I was there, picture all of the things that I ate so that I knew exactly why I was there working so hard.

I want to be healthy. I don't want to have a terrible relationship with food like I have in the past. I'm trying not to use food as a reward and I'm certainly not trying to use the gym as punishment. Who wants to willingly punish themselves?

I can't be the only one to have received bad advice, but hopefully I'm the only one who had to pay for it.

Replies

  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,416 Member
    You DO, however, have a bad relationship with your doctor.


    Keep looking for one you like. I don't like to give money to people who are toxic. You are right.

    And I get bad advice all the time, even though I don't ask for it. Take my mom, for instance..:laugh:
  • tseena
    tseena Posts: 8 Member
    I just fired my doctor over much the same thing. I have never been small however I have always been very fit. Two years ago I broke my back in a riding accident and then recently injured my foot while riding (horses). In three months I went from a size 12 to a size 20 and keeping strict track of everything I ate I found I generally eat about 1300 -1400 calories a day. So I went to the doctor. He took my blood and asked me about my past. I was honest told him of a bad childhood where I would go for days without eating and he then informed me I need to see a therapist. After explaining I had been in therapy and was certified sane and that my problem was clearly hormonal he never got off center and continued to tell me if I just dieted, was honest about what I ate and continued to workout I could maybe lose weight but not without the help of a good therapist.
  • sheila569
    sheila569 Posts: 269 Member
    About 10 months ago I went to my FORMER doctor looking for a weight loss plan, nutrition advice... anything that he could do to guide me in the right direction. I said I didn't want to undergo surgery or band. His response. "You'll never do it without surgery - you can try if you want to and you'll loose a few pounds but you'll never be able to loose the amount that you'll need to be a healty weight.

    Now, the best way to motivate me is tell me I can't do it. As you can see from the ticker and my profile picture the doctor was wrong. Another 20-25 and I'll be at goal. I'll be sure to visit him so I can tell him to kiss my Irish behind. :drinker:
  • gwyn48
    gwyn48 Posts: 23 Member
    I had just moved to a new city and asked a co-worker for an OB-GYN referrel. I went to her highly recommended DR for a UTI. After he wrote the prescription he said I needed to make an appointment for an annual exam because we needed to talk about my weight. At 286lbs, did he think I didn't know how heavy I was?????

    Never went back to him.

    I recommend a different dr. I have found female OB-GYN are SO much better at understanding weight issues and suggesting help.

    Dr's come in all shapes and sizes, and not all graduate at the top of their class. But for you to be successful you need a support system that works WITH YOU. This isn't it. He is not supporting you. Find a DR that will!!

    You deserve to be successful and deserve strong supportive people around you.
  • raeleek
    raeleek Posts: 414 Member
    Listen, I'm not trying to be disrespectful but doctors don't know everything. I've heard from more than one person (PAs, nurses, NPs) that doctors don't know much past what they specialize in.

    To name a few...

    Went to the ob/gyno when I was pg and I had a horrible earache at the time. He said it was nothing. Couldn't stand the pain so I went to our family doctor and I had DOUBLE ear infections AND a sinus infection. FAIL.

    My kids have horrible allergies. My oldest has them the worst and has bad eczema. I've taken her to see so many allergists, derms, peds, and regular doctors and the majority of them contradict each other or are unaware of half of what I've spent the last six years learning about allergies and eczema (through specialists/blood tests/ so on and so forth).


    If you're seeing a family doctor he/she have a broad scope of health information, they're not specialized. They aren't weight loss or internal medicine specialists. On top of that, your doctor sounds like he needs to take a course on bedside manner. I find most doctors fail horribly in that department too.

    Find a good doctor, workout hard, eat right, and enjoy!
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,416 Member

    Now, the best way to motivate me is tell me I can't do it. As you can see from the ticker and my profile picture the doctor was wrong. Another 20-25 and I'll be at goal. I'll be sure to visit him so I can tell him to kiss my Irish behind. :drinker:

    This is great!! Congrats, and absolutely worth the go-back. Doctors are just clueless with bedside manner...I love my female doctor, but she never said a word to me when I got to 220. I wish she had, instead of prescribing pills...not to say I would have liked that either, but I found my own path to health, and now I'm off all the pills.
  • jen10st
    jen10st Posts: 325 Member
    some doctors are completely clueless. i'm quite lucky and mine is great but a friend of mine who literally ate cereal, a sandwich and a really light evening meal every day was told by her doctor to cut down her food before he even asked about her diet. he simply took one look at her and assumed she ate junk all day.

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