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  • deniseearheart
    deniseearheart Posts: 919 Member
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    my new favorite


    "God made me an atheist. Who are you to question his wisdom."

    " The only thing wrong with being and atheist is that there is nobody to talk to during an orgasm" - unknown




    Bahahhahaha love it :)
  • taylor5877
    taylor5877 Posts: 1,792 Member
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    "Never trust a fart"
  • deniseearheart
    deniseearheart Posts: 919 Member
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    "Never trust a fart"



    gross but funny
  • deniseearheart
    deniseearheart Posts: 919 Member
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    Never tell people your problems. Eighty percent don't care, and the other twenty percent are glad you have them."

    - Lou Holtz



    oh yesssss!!!
  • obrendao
    obrendao Posts: 318
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    I may be a bit of an egghead but one that has always stuck with me is:

    "I would rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach 10,000 stars how not to dance" E.E. Cummings
  • thedancingleper
    thedancingleper Posts: 158 Member
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    Why do you have to be a nonconformist like everybody else? - James Thurber
  • Rhea30
    Rhea30 Posts: 625 Member
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    From facebook

    "If you rearrange the letters in 'faith' you get the word 'microwave'. Don't test it out. Just believe me." - Don't know.
  • thedancingleper
    thedancingleper Posts: 158 Member
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    From facebook

    "If you rearrange the letters in 'faith' you get the word 'microwave'. Don't test it out. Just believe me." - Don't know.

    Best. Quote. Ever.
  • Lee510
    Lee510 Posts: 46
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    An old friend who died a couple years ago always said, "People are no darned good. Except for you and me and I worry about you half the time."

    He would also say, "I don't want any buddies. I don't want any pals. As soon as I get one, they move and want me to help them."
  • lshaunessy
    lshaunessy Posts: 64
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    I am not crazy, my mother had me tested. -Sheldon Cooper, The Big Bang Theory
  • apedeb09
    apedeb09 Posts: 805 Member
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    “I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.”
    ― Marilyn Monroe
  • technicalman
    technicalman Posts: 23 Member
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    Try not! Do! Or, do not! There is no try! Yoda...
  • alfpalmer
    alfpalmer Posts: 150 Member
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    I'd tell you to go to hell, but i work there and I don't want to see you every day.
  • deniseearheart
    deniseearheart Posts: 919 Member
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    I'd tell you to go to hell, but i work there and I don't want to see you every day.



    yessss I like this one!!!!!
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
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    God does not believe in athiests therefore athiests do not exist.
  • monicalosesweight
    monicalosesweight Posts: 1,173 Member
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    “All major changes are like death. You can't see to the other side until you are there.”
    ― Michael Crichton, Jurassic Park

    “All your life, other people will try to take your accomplishments away from you. Don't you take it away from yourself.”
    ― Michael Crichton, The Lost World

    “If I had followed my better judgment always, my life would have been a very dull one.”
    ― Edgar Rice Burroughs

    "The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds the most discoveries, is not "Eureka!" (I found it!) but 'That's funny..."
    — Isaac Asimov

    "A woman is not property, and husbands who think otherwise are living in a dreamworld."
    — Robert A. Heinlein (Time Enough for Love)

    "Too many people live the lives other people think they ought to, following orders they don't agree with, for causes they don't believe in. They live lives that don't matter, that touch no one and change nothing. For better or worse, you and I stared evil in the eye and didn't flinch. We raised our swords and went to war, and even if we didn't win we kicked some *kitten* along the way. We made a difference, and that's all any man can ask."
    — Simon R. Green (Deathstalker (Deathstalker, #1))

    These are just some cool quotes from some authors. :)
  • NYChick84
    NYChick84 Posts: 331 Member
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    “My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.” - Ellen DeGeneres
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    Nice to see you trying to stir crap up again. I know you semi-succeeded last time. Trying for a better luck this time?

    It's sad that I don't have my reply from last time. I didn't knew you would be trying to troll again so soon else I woulda saved it for you OP :)

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