no motivation

wannamakemykidsproud
wannamakemykidsproud Posts: 4 Member
in Introduce Yourself
i want to lose weight so my kids wont be ashamed of me, i have a 6 year old and a 5 month old, i lost 8kilo while i was pregnant and B-feeding, once i stopped B-feeding i was still hungry all the time and have put 8kg back on. i am so depressed because of my weight and i hate myself for being so fat. i want to lose weight so bad but lose motivation and when i get depressed i binge eat, some days i have an insatiable hunger and crave chocalate and junk food, iv been using MFP app on my phone 4 a week and im trying my best to be honest on it but i dont like the results, im walking everyday and i try to get to the gym a few times a week but i find it difficult due to schhol hours and the times the gym is closed of a day. what i really need is motivation some days im just to tired and dont want to exersize if we had a bad night, i know i only have myself to blame for being the way i am but i really want to change, when i first started trying to lose weight back in 2008 i lost 20 kilo in 6month and i loved it, but after having a miscarriage i got really depressed and pack 14 back on, i was bigger than i had ever been in size even though i was lighter. HELP i want my children to know its not ok to be obese i want them to be proud of me and i dont want to be told by my 6yo that im fat
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Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

Replies

  • wannamakemykidsproud
    wannamakemykidsproud Posts: 4 Member
    can anyone give me any advice?
  • Notte
    Notte Posts: 17 Member
    What does your diet and exercise look like?
  • Morganqt
    Morganqt Posts: 4
    I can't say that I know exactly what you're going through- I don't have any kids haha. But maybe you can get your kids involved with your healthier lifestyle. Get them to go on walks with you/ eat healthy foods. That way, they'll be doing it with you and keep you on track! Also! It really does help a lot to add a lot of friends on here. They really do keep you motivated, and, because they can see how much you've excercised/ if you've eaten over your calorie goal, they can keep you on track, too.
  • wndrtchr
    wndrtchr Posts: 2 Member
    It sounds like you're really beating yourself up about the situation. I understand we have to take responsibility for our actions because no one is holding a gun to our heads and telling us to over-eat or eat the stuff we know we ought not eat, but try to be kind to yourself. The way I look at it is that it took a lifetime of bad habits to end up overweight and I have to change them in order to be healthy, but Rome wasn't built in a day. Taking small steps and making small changes add up to big results. It sounds like you are well on your way to doing that already. Focus on the progress you've made and incorporate one small change every week, You'll get there! I have kids, too. One of the hardest things I've always encountered was feeling guilty for taking time for myself. I realized that what I was doing was not only for myself but for them as well. Happy healthy parents usually lead to happy healthy kids! Good luck!
  • ktull68
    ktull68 Posts: 19
    I have been where you are several times. I have 4 children and am only 5 ft 2. When my oldest was born in 1993 I tipped the scales at 197 and was diabetic. I felt horrible about myself and wanted so badly to get the weight off. I had miscarried before her and packed on
    enough weight to start my pregnancy at 163. Today I weigh 131. My best is 116 soaking wet. I understand your discouragement and
    bad feelings. I do want to suggest that you give yourself a little more time to recover from your precious new baby. Your body isn't ready for anything drastic. I look back on those days and wish I had just spent more time loving my daughter and not worrying about how I looked and felt. I loved her but was so focused on myself. To beat the discouragement I went through a weightloss program that
    focused on hunger and fullness and giving my bad feelings to God through prayer and reading the Bible. It helped a lot. It was comforting to know that God loved me at a time when I could not love myself. MFP can only provide a bandaid when the issues for why we overeat are in the soul. I still struggle. Don't get me wrong. But when I feel I'm losing the battle, I pray and ask for His help.
    No diet tricks or programs will help until you are okay inside. Try to eat only when you feel a growl and cut your normal portions in half. Take your sadness and down times to God and let Him help you. Its hard to imagine God would even care about our weight, but the reality is He cares about US period. I'll try to keep up with you. I would love to encourage you if you want to be friends. It sounds like you could use one!
  • astovey
    astovey Posts: 578 Member
    Don't beat yourself up....and drink coffee....always gives me the energy to workout. Also, there are some great websites out there that can give you healthy recipies for yummy food so you don't feel like you're missing out :)
  • MzLaMonica
    MzLaMonica Posts: 3 Member
    I completely understand...Try focusing on the positive things...start today with increasing ur water intake and taking ur measurements so u can see some type of progress.
  • marlisi
    marlisi Posts: 1
    I'm a food junkie too but have found Jello sugar free chocolate pudding (60 calories), Kelloggs lower calorie
    sweetened cereals (Corn Pops 100 calories/cup), celery with Laughing Cow (35 calories a wedge) and you
    can make it spread a number of sticks of celery. The South Beach Diet book really helped me. I keep my weigh under
    control but it's by eating LOTS of lower calorie foods. And drinking lots of Crystal Lite and flavored, unsweetened
    seltzer.Look at whatever you can find positive and KEEP BUSY. I eat more when I watch TV. Good luck.
  • Liesie42
    Liesie42 Posts: 1
    I agree with what the other ladies have said so far, and just want to add... YOU CAN DO THIS!! =) It sounds like you are already there in your motivation-- you want to make your kids proud, and you WILL. =)

    I have a major sweet tooth and I love eating, so it helps me stay on track to eat something for lunch that is really yummy but low-calorie, like a Freebirds hybird beef burrito (501 calories) or a Met-Rx Crispy Apple Pie protein bar (400 calories). Maybe if you can find some favorites like this, they can keep you on track during the day. You can add me to your friends if you want to, as a motivator! :)
  • RuthSweetTooth
    RuthSweetTooth Posts: 461 Member
    There is hope. Would love to help you but I never send friend requests to people who have closed diaries, blank profiles, no pic to help me learn their personality. Perhaps you can fix that and send me a friend request.
  • asdandme
    asdandme Posts: 72 Member
    Don't get overwelmed....its all about baby steps....you have a 5 month old so some days you will be tired, so on those days make it your goal to drink all your water and healthier choices,like fat free sugar free chocolate pudding cup instead of a candy bar ect. you could do strength training using your baby as a weight ...not only will you benifit but your baby will love it . There are internet sites that will give you exercises foer mommy and baby. take a deep breath you can do this just take it slowly and don't beat your self up over the failures look for the good.:smile:
  • Ltrautman80
    Ltrautman80 Posts: 47 Member
    I can somewhat relate with your situation. 1st off, please stop beating yourself up. Try to only think positive. My children are my number one reaon for losing weight. My kids know that i'm fat, and I want o change that. I love it when my daughter tells me I look like i'm losing weight. I want to be able to play with my kids the park and not be tired and be the mom sitting on the bench. Even if you go a week without losing weight, still think of it as an accomplishment because a zero weight loss means that you didn't gain it. I'm here for you if you want. :smile:
  • imma_rosta
    imma_rosta Posts: 30 Member
    Start with little mini goals. When you accomplish something you feel better about yourself and have more pride. But regardless how overweight you are or how slack you are with working out, you need to first LOVE yourself. Your kids love you and they would be sad to know that you don't love yourself. Make your kids proud by having a great self-esteem. They, in turn, will see you and learn to have self-esteem themselves which will help as they get older. There is hope and help on here. Everyone on here cares about your success and are here for the same reason you are... MOTIVATION.

    Please, don't be so hard on yourself. Baby steps are better than no steps. Keep your head up. Where there's a will, there's a way :)
  • imma_rosta
    imma_rosta Posts: 30 Member
    I have been where you are several times. I have 4 children and am only 5 ft 2. When my oldest was born in 1993 I tipped the scales at 197 and was diabetic. I felt horrible about myself and wanted so badly to get the weight off. I had miscarried before her and packed on
    enough weight to start my pregnancy at 163. Today I weigh 131. My best is 116 soaking wet. I understand your discouragement and
    bad feelings. I do want to suggest that you give yourself a little more time to recover from your precious new baby. Your body isn't ready for anything drastic. I look back on those days and wish I had just spent more time loving my daughter and not worrying about how I looked and felt. I loved her but was so focused on myself. To beat the discouragement I went through a weightloss program that
    focused on hunger and fullness and giving my bad feelings to God through prayer and reading the Bible. It helped a lot. It was comforting to know that God loved me at a time when I could not love myself. MFP can only provide a bandaid when the issues for why we overeat are in the soul. I still struggle. Don't get me wrong. But when I feel I'm losing the battle, I pray and ask for His help.
    No diet tricks or programs will help until you are okay inside. Try to eat only when you feel a growl and cut your normal portions in half. Take your sadness and down times to God and let Him help you. Its hard to imagine God would even care about our weight, but the reality is He cares about US period. I'll try to keep up with you. I would love to encourage you if you want to be friends. It sounds like you could use one!

    AMEN SISTER! God is TRULY amazing :)
  • Yummamamma
    Yummamamma Posts: 79 Member
    I was feeling the same as you!! I have a one year old. I have recently decided enough is enough, no more excuses!! I went to GNC and picked up Womens ultra mega vitapack (makes me vibrate). started walking 40 minutes a day with my baby in the stroller and eat properly and already see results! (small results) but I finally feel better and got my motivation back. I never thought I would ever get my motivation back ever again but its happened!! So kick your own *kitten* and just get out and DO it. You might even want to get up and do it again the next day ;)
  • likemeinvisible
    likemeinvisible Posts: 309
    Put order into your exercise, plan ahead on what day at what time you do what, and stick to it like crazy.
    Put order into your menu, plan what you eat for breakfst, before workout after workout and have something ready like veggies for when you are about to reach for the sweets. You've done it before, you can do it again.
  • yroma
    yroma Posts: 74 Member
    It so hard to feel that way. This journey is not easy. But, here are some positives: two great kids offer you some incredible motivation! You are losing, it might be slowly but that's the kind of weight loss that sticks. You're on MFP which is very helpful. You asked for help! That's not easy. Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to be kind to yourself. Imagine if a friend wrote what you wrote, what would you tell them? Feel free to add me if you feel like you need more support. Personally, I think you're doing a pretty good job. We've all been there one way or another. I struggle with depression and I have some pretty dark days where exercise and healthy eating are out the window. But, working on myself and my problems almost always feel better than bingeing and not even trying. Like anyone else, I'd like to see that weight come off faster, but I'm old enough to know there is no magic elixir--believe me I've spent a lot of time and energy looking! I wish you the best...
  • jsabet
    jsabet Posts: 51 Member
    i want to lose weight so my kids wont be ashamed of me, i have a 6 year old and a 5 month old, i lost 8kilo while i was pregnant and B-feeding, once i stopped B-feeding i was still hungry all the time and have put 8kg back on. i am so depressed because of my weight and i hate myself for being so fat. i want to lose weight so bad but lose motivation and when i get depressed i binge eat, some days i have an insatiable hunger and crave chocalate and junk food, iv been using MFP app on my phone 4 a week and im trying my best to be honest on it but i dont like the results, im walking everyday and i try to get to the gym a few times a week but i find it difficult due to schhol hours and the times the gym is closed of a day. what i really need is motivation some days im just to tired and dont want to exersize if we had a bad night, i know i only have myself to blame for being the way i am but i really want to change, when i first started trying to lose weight back in 2008 i lost 20 kilo in 6month and i loved it, but after having a miscarriage i got really depressed and pack 14 back on, i was bigger than i had ever been in size even though i was lighter. HELP i want my children to know its not ok to be obese i want them to be proud of me and i dont want to be told by my 6yo that im fat
    27401495.png
    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

    It seems like you know what the problem is. And you need a change. There are millions of people out there who have truly given up and taken a blind eye to their problems.

    First and foremost. You need to come to terms with your past and make a conscious decision to move forward a different person. Not an "I'll go to the gym every day, or I'll never have chocolate" - but a life changer. You have kids, and I'm sure they are proud of you, and will be even more proud of you for being a healthier person. This is a life change, so make it something you enjoy or you will never keep up with it. You can totally make it, and you only have progress from here.

    Secondly, find what trips you up and cut it out. We ALL have triggers. Mine is sugar. If I have more than a very little bit I derail hard. Binge eating, guilt. I used to get caught in the wheel and keep feeding but I learned that if I remove it from my diet, I literally stop craving it. If you think that could help you out, I can give tons of advice on that.

    Thirdly, I know this is weird. But put a mirror in your kitchen. When I started my journey I put a floor to ceiling one in the kitchen next to the fridge. It's impossible to binge when you gotta watch yourself do it.

    Lastly, drink water, take vit-d, and create mini goals. All three of these work to fight depression.


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  • fanipack
    fanipack Posts: 28
    Two of the best sources of information I've used in my weight loss journey. Hope you at least learn something.

    http://www.reddit.com/help/faqs/Fitness#WeightLoss
    http://www.reddit.com/help/faqs/Fitness#Diet

    Also , don't forget that we're human and that we struggle everyday. Most important thing is to never give up and keep going.

    Oh and track everything you eat ! Tracking 70% of your calorie intake is good as useless.

    Good Luck :) !
  • atxdee
    atxdee Posts: 613 Member
    the only thing i can say is JUST DO IT. seriously just stand up if anything, do the first rep of whatever you are going, getting started is the hardest part but once u get goign you will get motivated and feel better
  • ashleighcassidy73
    ashleighcassidy73 Posts: 1 Member
    You've lost 80lbs, that is AMAZING!!!! Well done :) I hope to do the same over the coming months :)
  • shannajojo
    shannajojo Posts: 192 Member
    You are "having a moment" as I like to call it. Write down or track on here every single peice of food you eat or drink. it is really an eye opener looking at how many calories you consume. Start off with little things like drinking 64 ounces of water a day or half your body weight, taking a mulit-vitamin, exercising 30 minutes at least 3 times a week, etc. Dry your eyes and start over!!! Every day is a brand new day!!! :-)
  • luvmyhawg
    luvmyhawg Posts: 1
    I read an awesome book I found on Amazon called "The skinny on willpower" by James Randel. Check it out this really help me.BEst of luck to you.
  • RainHoward
    RainHoward Posts: 1,599 Member
    I can relate to the depression and binge eating. The one thing I read in your post that struck me though was this; " know i only have myself to blame for being the way i am but i really want to change,". That is the biggest and most important step right there, making the choice to change. It takes some of us longer than others.

    I would strongly suggest seeing a therapist of some type to help you deal with the depression because until you address those issues losing weight, in my experience at least, is VERY difficult. When you use food as the answer to most of lifes difficulties it's virtually impossible to stay healthy.

    We can all do this. I know we can. And there are some great people on here who are more than happy to support you.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    SLOW down! You've only been here a week! There's no need to panic if you have an off day with eating or skip a workout or two...or three. Just keep on making changes slowly and patiently. Eventually, when you stick with it, good habits form and you WILL see results. The healthiest long-term weight loss generally takes time!

    Exercise is awesome for so many reasons, and I would definately encourage it, but I wouldn't make it the focus if it's overwhelming you right now. You won't fail at weight loss if you don't exercise. (But it does earn you extra cals if you do it and it's a great mood boost.) Just make sure you measure and log all your food and drink, and that you stay at a healthy deficit. Above all - have patience. This is not an overnight success plan. You can do it! :heart:

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