Always angry / frustrated

Congrats on the new baby! And feel for your lack of sleep!! ... both you and mom of.

On top of that you have weight loss, or more specifically health improvement goals ... Personally I can't tell you what to do: one always does what answers his/her needs in the short term. You can read my profile to see how I accomplished my goal, and if you have any questions, feel free.

Your fatigue is making you angry and please realize that's a short term thing until your babe is sleeping more. Your wife breastfeeding is giving your child the best start in life: it will mean a lifetime start to good health. Only if you had a child born sickly could you appreciate how blessed you are.

My best wishes and blessings on your family.

Hi. Having kids is great, but it can be hard work for both parents. I know exactly how you feel, you're not quite enough, you're not sleeping right, you're irritable, tired, down on yourself....

You're doing a great job being a very, VERY supporting husband and new dad. You are probably feeling left out a bit too, as it's all mum and baby together and you may feel a little on the periphery of that. trust me, you're right in there!

Dad's do seem to get a rough deal early days, you do what you can, be as supportive as possible, but there's only so much you can do, and you want to help out more. You could ask your wife if she would consider expressing some milk, so that if you want to help with the feeds, you can and she can have a break. We did that, and it was great.

Don't beat yourself up my friend (and noone ever considered you'd raise your voice, let alone your hand). go ahead and setup the punchbag, but sometimes it's better to just be there, try and get some time for you (it's OK to do that) and above all, marvel at and enjoy that little girl!

You're a dad, it's going to take some getting used to - but it is, without a doubt, the best damn thing ever!!

I find that lack of adequate rest combined with reduced food intake is a mood-killer. Maybe move your calories up to near maintenance until you get your daughter's sleep sorted.

Congrats on the baby. 4 weeks is young to be sleeping through and it is a terrible strain on both parents. It will slowly get better by itself but there are things that you can try to help it along.

We brought a book that, cannot remember who by but I am sure someone on here will know, called the the contented baby or something like that. It talks about getting into a routine, about making rooms where your baby sleeps really dark at night, about how to approach night time feeds. It didn't all work for us, like breaking a plateux, there was a bit of trial and error.

We all react in different ways when we are out of control in a situation, exhausted and under stress. I just hate the fact that babies don't come with a user manual like your stereo. I'd probably still not read it but knowing it is there if intuition fails is a great comfort! Try to understand what is making you angry and frustrated. We can blame it on something but it won't go away unless we figure out what it is and deal with it. A punch bag will sort the symptoms but not the cause, but better that than letting things overspill.

My wife and I always made sure we had dinner together and talked through problems particularly over how we were feeling. It meant we worked out solutions that meant we got a bit more sleep (we set up a bit of a shift pattern), figured out just what she needed from me, what I needed from her. Just getting a couple of hours more sleep and communicating made the world of difference.

Congrats again - and these sleepless nights are nothing compared with the sleepless nights you will have when your "little girl" starts going out on her own!!!!!!!

Oh hello, give yourself a break. 4 week old baby in the house!!!! Everyone will br cranky, tired and taking it out on each other.

My husband did not 'do' the newborn stage and we argued and argued for weeks and weeks when we brought our 2 kids home frmo the hospital.

Re not being able to participate in the whole bf'ng thing, offer to change the baby's nappy after she is done winding the baby, settle the baby etc etc. If your partner is thinking of expressing, give this bottle.

I know a newborn can be scary (even as a mum of 2 I can say this!) but things will settle down. Don't be hard on yourself, it's a BIG adjustment for all of you.

Ah the sleep nights..........you never get used to them and I used to work 12 hr night shifts. Sleep when you can.

Hi there and congrats on your new arrival! I breastfed my son for 2 months before I called it quits. I started transitioning to formul at month two and by month 3, I was done breastfeeding. I may have wanted to continue but quite frankly... I hated it. There were various reasons I didn't like it but I tell you this because in my son's case, he was sleeping 12 hour nights by 6 weeks old. I credit that to formula unfortunately. Would I have liked to be able to satisfy him myself? Sure. Was I glad I could sleep through the night so I was a happier, healthier, well-rested Mom for him during the day? HECK YA!

ANyways, as another poster said... trial and error. Try different things and give them a chance to work. If after a while they don't, try something new. I avoided a coilcky baby by changing his dinner time. Took me a couple weeks to figure that one out but I finally did and we were all much happier for it.

Good luck and again congratulations!

Hi Angry, Your daughter is very precious and as tough as it is for you, think how it is for your wife. I've had kids and know what you are going through, but you getting up tight about it is probably got as much to do with you losing sleep as your daughter.

Embrace it, hold your daughter as much as possible1 These days will pass. Enjoy the blessing you have and your nights will bee a lot easier.

Basil

Been there - my 2nd daughter was impossible sleeper for 7 years. Let's say that I *understood* how someone could be driven beyond desperation. And there is a reason for that 7 year gap between number 2 and 3, 4 daughters.

Naps help - see if you can schedule your time to fit baby time.
Over exercising does not help because being that tired makes things worse. But I ran sprints.

Talking helped enormously.

And on several occasions I slept elsewhere - I was not useful for a few night so might as well get sleep. Later, when she was older - we took turns sleeping at the IL. Or just dropped her off for a sleep night.

She's fine now at 16. But every once in a while I'll sneak in a 5 am and wake her up for a run. Just because.

This may sound strange and silly, but once I cut back my carbs, I felt less flustered. For me, I think carbs alter my moods. :frown:

So, maybe cut back on them and see it that works.:happy:

In the mean time, hope you can get some well deserved rest.:happy: