I think I have ED

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batigol1985
batigol1985 Posts: 12
in Motivation and Support
hi guys...saw this thread and hoped I could get some support too.

About this time last year I went travelling for a year RTW. However in the 6 months prior (start of 2011) Im sure i was suffering from an ED and had a fitness addiction. I dropped to almost 58kg (Im 5.8 and usually 72ish). people were commenting on how thin I got but as you know you just brush it off. I guess I wanted to have control on some aspects of my life - I didnt like my job, love life was non existant - so I used fitness and diet to consume myself. I would eat maybe 1000 kcals a day and do 1.5 hrs in gym every night. I was miserable. Then I went off travelling and changed totally..loved life...ate lots - way too much in fact got to about 85kg arggh...but had amazing experience.

Im back since June and obviously I wanted to get back in shape. Like you all can probably appreciate most of us know what we should be eating and how damaging what we do is but Im after slipping back into the old mindframe. The ED is back and prob worse than before. Im not working, stuck back at my parents and I am totally consumed by my diet and exercise. Sometimes I would eat as low as 500kcals, not even taking into account what I burn at the gym. Basically life is dragging me down...I know I need to eat more but in my mind my body isnt right ( Im back at 70kg but still think i look fat). Yesterday I was going to have a day where I would eat anything I liked...but I decided that to do this i had to go to gym and do 1hr cardio and burn 600 cals first. Then after I thought...why eat now when you burned so much. My 'cheat meal' amounted to a pack of popcorn and 2 slices of toast.

I know I need to stop but just cant shake the mindset!! Just looking for some support or words of inspiration really - and prob just had to put it down in writing...thanks

Replies

  • ZugTheMegasaurus
    ZugTheMegasaurus Posts: 801 Member
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    Honestly, it's a huge first step to even recognize that you have a problem; you should feel proud that you're even asking for help. But people on this site won't be able to give you the help you need.

    If you have a current physician, see your doctor, explain the problem, and get a referral to a mental health professional who can work with you on getting healthy.

    If you don't have a physician, use this website to find a doctor, treatment center, or support group: http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/get-help-today/index.php
    Based on your use of kg though, I think you might not be in the US. That site has good information but the locator won't help; if you let me know where you are, I can try to find a similar resource for your area.

    These sources of support can help you change your disordered behavior and relationship with your body, and help you learn healthy ways to deal with stress. You owe it to yourself to take care of this issue right away so that you can have a long, happy, healthy life.
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,248 Member
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    Honestly, it's a huge first step to even recognize that you have a problem; you should feel proud that you're even asking for help. But people on this site won't be able to give you the help you need.

    I fully agree. Knowing you have a problem and wanting to change is a HUGE accomplishment in itself.

    But you do need professional help. It's similar to if your eyesight suddenly changed... you'd know you'd need an optometrist to help you see clearly. Instead, you need medical help to help you see yourself and your food/exercise choices more clearly.
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,720 Member
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    "an" is a surprisingly important word... jokes.

    What you did takes a lot of courage. It's an important first step. Now that you recognize there is a real problem you can take the steps towards doing something about it.

    Counseling is very necessary. There's no reason to think you can do this all on your own, it's harder and you don't have to. Seek out a professional you can trust to get you the help you need.

    You aren't alone in this. You have nothing to be ashamed of. But it's important you take care of yourself. You need to know that you're worth that.

    Good luck to you.
  • batigol1985
    batigol1985 Posts: 12
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    "an" is a surprisingly important word... jokes.

    What you did takes a lot of courage. It's an important first step. Now that you recognize there is a real problem you can take the steps towards doing something about it.

    Counseling is very necessary. There's no reason to think you can do this all on your own, it's harder and you don't have to. Seek out a professional you can trust to get you the help you need.

    You aren't alone in this. You have nothing to be ashamed of. But it's important you take care of yourself. You need to know that you're worth that.

    Good luck to you.

    Thanks for all the replies....I think sometimes that just putting it in words can help a lot without immediately having to answer the ques back like why etc..

    And yes....put "an" in does seem important :) no need to add to the probs

    but seriously thanks everyone

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