Stupid Wedding Question!

oregonzoo
oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
in Chit-Chat
I'm sorry I'm bored and thought I would get some options...

We got engaged about three months ago. We have had a difficult time finding something we loved due to finances (we want a lovely place that isn't going to cost a TON) and the fact that I'm not there to look at these places often.

But we finally found a venue we loved, and a date.


Two weeks ago, his friend also gets engaged. My fiance asks him when he plans on getting married (fall of 2013) and asks what venue we were thinking about. So he tells the guy the venue.
A week later, they've announced they are getting married at the place we have chosen. Now we haven't paid anything yet. And I'm not sure if they have.

But is it poor form for us to still use the place as venue?

Replies

  • Pebble321
    Pebble321 Posts: 6,423 Member
    No.
    How will that affect your wedding in anyway?
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
    Sounds fine to me. I can't imagine them having a problem with it - but if they do, they stole your idea, so they wouldn't have any right to be annoyed.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    No.
    How will that affect your wedding in anyway?

    Honestly, it won't. I just want to be sure it's not kind of rude. All the same people are going to be going to two separate weddings, a month apart.
    AT THE SAME PLACE!

    lol
    I just want to make sure I don't look tacky or rude.
  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
    If you love it, do it. Don't let someone else's wedding change that for you. Though it may be corny for mutual friends to go to bunches of weddings at the same place, but every locale has a few places that "everyone" uses...
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    Sounds fine to me. I can't imagine them having a problem with it - but if they do, they stole your idea, so they wouldn't have any right to be annoyed.

    You chose it first, if anyone should be mad/annoyed it should be you.
  • ZugTheMegasaurus
    ZugTheMegasaurus Posts: 801 Member
    I'm the first to admit that I understand NOTHING about weddings, but that said, I don't know why it would be a problem. If it's a wedding-appropriate venue, then surely lots of people have weddings there, right? Why should it matter that some of them happen to know each other?
  • Loulady
    Loulady Posts: 511 Member
    Don't sweat it. Just do what you like and makes sense for you, your fiance, and your guests.
  • Spicydeene
    Spicydeene Posts: 37 Member
    I can understand you're being a little tiffed.

    Keep in mind that your wedding and their wedding will be totally different. Different color schemes, different bands or DJ's, different favors. They're not planning yours and you are not planning theirs.
  • ohmyshysamantha
    ohmyshysamantha Posts: 138 Member
    no biggie. just be sure to make yours more memorable ;)

    What they said ^^^^^
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    Sounds fine to me. I can't imagine them having a problem with it - but if they do, they stole your idea, so they wouldn't have any right to be annoyed.

    You chose it first, if anyone should be mad/annoyed it should be you.
    I was for about 5 minutes. And I looked more at other places. BUT I can't see us doing it elsewhere. It just fits what I want.
    But life was too short to be angry. I strongly dislike when people make such a pretty day ugly with drama. Just want to be sure I'm not doing that here!
  • misskerouac
    misskerouac Posts: 2,242 Member
    I don't think it matters.
    I live in a town that all the weddings are generally in the same 1 or 2 places. And it always looks different depending on what colours you are having, what the centerpieces are and so on. Even if it's the same venue, it's still a different experience because you are different people. I wouldn't worry about it.
  • megmay2591
    megmay2591 Posts: 621 Member
    I think that you should use the venue that you like. As long as your wedding isn't on the same day it should be fine :laugh:
  • RealWomenLovePitbulls
    RealWomenLovePitbulls Posts: 729 Member
    it doesnt matter if it is at the same place, ur wedding will be your own and i'm sure u'll have ur own unique touches and so will they
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    At least some of the guests will already know how to get to the second wedding.
  • Panther_Sir
    Panther_Sir Posts: 5
    I would be a bit proud that you picked a place that other liked so much that they too want to be married there. As long as they don't try to take the day you want, have fun seeing the diffidence in the weddings at the same place.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    At least some of the guests will already know how to get to the second wedding.

    See, good thinking!
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    At least some of the guests will already know how to get to the second wedding.

    See, good thinking!

    I'm delightfully practical.
  • magj0y
    magj0y Posts: 1,911 Member
    A bit confused..

    who is getting married first

    who found the venue first?

    Either way, stick with what you have!!
  • SLambertAlaska
    SLambertAlaska Posts: 197 Member
    I agree with the "don't sweat it" attitude folks have posted here. HOWEVER, since you seem like a gracious person you might want to look at the "other bride" angle. Your fiance - his guy friend . . . Is the friend's bride going to think you stole her venue? Will she create drama? Do you know her? If she's a friend it should be easy to make a friendly comment about how cool it is that you're both getting married in the same place to be sure she doesn't get surprised (and upset). If you don't know her, you might just run it by your fiance to see how his friend thinks she might react. You got over it in 5 minutes. She might need 5 days, or 5 weeks - or maybe not. Just worth a quick check.
  • VelociMama
    VelociMama Posts: 3,119 Member
    Just stick with it. If it fits your budget, and your both like it, just have the wedding you both want and will enjoy. Don't worry about anyone else's plans.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    A bit confused..

    who is getting married first

    who found the venue first?

    Either way, stick with what you have!!
    We found it first, we are getting married first.
  • magj0y
    magj0y Posts: 1,911 Member
    A bit confused..

    who is getting married first

    who found the venue first?

    Either way, stick with what you have!!
    We found it first, we are getting married first.

    Then you're golden with whatever the other bride and families think. Keep your venue!
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    not at all. i don't even know why you think its an issue.
  • lawmama_
    lawmama_ Posts: 103 Member
    Honestly I'd be pissed because if you be sharing the same guests, guests will naturally compare your wedding to your friend's wedding at the same place. I wouldn't want my wedding compared to anyone else's.
  • VelociMama
    VelociMama Posts: 3,119 Member
    Honestly I'd be pissed because if you be sharing the same guests, guests will naturally compare your wedding to your friend's wedding at the same place. I wouldn't want my wedding compared to anyone else's.

    Doesn't matter if it's in the same place or not. Guests will always compare.

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