Am I being unfair?

It is decisions like this one that make you get to goal. good for you. Your family understands..anyone who doesn't could be a saboteur..so watch out.

suggestions:

Have a family member cook a healthy meal at home for you..and a low fat birthday cake (maybe grill out?)

I like the go to the movies thing...

go to your pick of a restaurant that you know has a meal you like within your calories.

YOu can always have a sliver of cake...and can suggest the cake you want from a bakery that makes a low fat lower calorie cake.

Well it's your choice - but remember - time with family is very important. You may regret the time lost! Let them treat you if you've been working hard at this, you deserve some time to celebrate LIFE! Happy birthday!

I liked the suggestion that someone else made about offering to have them over for dinner and board games. Arguably, it's your birthday and therefore you shouldn't necessarily have to cook and host, but at the same time, with that option you can remain in control of the dining situation and everyone can still have a fun time together.

I think I understand what you're getting at about it never being as easy as "just" ordering skinless chicken & veggies or an unadorned salad. But like others have said, one birthday meal at a restaurant, where you indulge in something that you might normally consider off-limits, isn't going to ruin a week's worth of progress. It's important to get back on track, but try to enjoy yourself. I "gained" 3 lbs Saturday night after a BBQ that I had forgotten we were going to until about 3 hours before we went. I had been pretty lazy all day and had snacked a fair amount during the day. I was just going to not eat when we got there, but I was actually hungry, and the burgers smelled ridiculously good. So I had a couple of burger patties on my plate (I can't have wheat, so at least I saved a few calories there), a couple of brats, and a hard cider. I went WAY WAY over for the day (like, 1000 over). Sunday morning, I was morbidly curious, so I got on the scale - I was up 3 lbs from my weigh-in on Friday. Now, 1000 extra calories does not equal 3 lbs of legitimate weight gain, and I had to remind myself of that a few times. I watched my sodium intake for the next couple of days, and tried to stay within my target calories (although I did have a gluten-free cupcake Sunday night, after I had already hit my goal for the day... we just got a Whole Foods so I obviously had to do some *cough* quality control on their gluten-free products). Anyway, when I weighed myself on Tuesday morning, I had not only dropped that 3 lbs from the weekend, but another 1/2 lb or so, and I'm back on track now.

Anyway. I hope you have a happy birthday with your family, with or without a slab of ribs. It is possible to have a social gathering without food, but some people get nervous about that. You could maybe go to the zoo or something, or see a show, and then share some fro-yo or go out for coffee afterward to chat? But having to go way out of your comfort zone to do something for YOUR birthday, just to make your family happy - that just seems kinda crummy. :flowerforyou:

Why not invite everyone over, have tons of fresh fruit and veggies and make non alcoholic smoothies! (fruit, a little no calorie liquid like propel or even water.. and some ice!) Then turn up the music and have a dance off! Food thats good for you, lots of exercise & a heck of a time!! and take lots of pictures & make a frame on the wall for a reminder of how you succeeded in having an amazing time while sticking up for your new lifestyle!!

Edited to sayif you want to drink.. add one shot of your choice in the smoothies! They are REALLY good & will be about 120 calories per BIG drink!