Am I over reacting?

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chljlleal
chljlleal Posts: 230 Member
in Chit-Chat
My eldest child (Charlotte) is six and has been taken away on holiday this week by her aunties. Now while I appreciate the favour that they are doing me by taking her away in the holidays I wish they would respect my (and my daughter's) meal choices, likes/dislikes, routine etc.

I have always tried to make sure my kids have a good (sensible) breakfast and eat regularly throughout the day to stop any blood sugar peaks and dips which tend to result in miserable, tearful moods.

Charlotte has NEVER like chips (french fries), she isn't the fussiest child I have come across, her only big no's are chips and cheese.

Anyway apparently yesterday it seems they decided to not eat much all day and then have a chip supper. Charlotte ate the chips as that was all that was on offer and she was starving!

I am now being told that I am feeding her too much in the day and I should force her to eat chips because they have proved that she will if she is hungry enough!?!?!!?

Oh and then they rewarded her eating chips with a knicker blocker glory sundae!

Is this a healthy way to bring up my daughter?

Should I force her to eat chips if she would rather eat any meat, fish, vegetable, fruit, cereal, bread, pasta, rice that I put in front of her?

She loves eating "clean" and she loves sweet things especially chocolate, her diet is definitely varied and I don't think chips and jelly sweets actually add anything good to her diet. - I have never taught her about eating clean, it's just the way she eats.

I have just spent the last 3 weeks re-educating Charlotte about healthy eating after her school botched up that lesson!

AND I am gratefull to them for making the room to take her on holiday.

I thank you for the chance to rant and get it off my chest.

Replies

  • LadyIvysMom
    LadyIvysMom Posts: 391 Member
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    It doesn't sound like the aunts are "bringing up" your daughter. It sounds like they are taking her on vacation for a week. If she's not horrifically obese or diabetic, I see no harm in letting a 6 year old child have some fries and a sundae over the span of one week on vacation... Maybe I'm missing something?
  • beckajw
    beckajw Posts: 1,738 Member
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    My eldest child (Charlotte) is six and has been taken away on holiday this week by her aunties. Now while I appreciate the favour that they are doing me by taking her away in the holidays I wish they would respect my (and my daughter's) meal choices, likes/dislikes, routine etc.

    I have always tried to make sure my kids have a good (sensible) breakfast and eat regularly throughout the day to stop any blood sugar peaks and dips which tend to result in miserable, tearful moods.

    Charlotte has NEVER like chips (french fries), she isn't the fussiest child I have come across, her only big no's are chips and cheese.

    Anyway apparently yesterday it seems they decided to not eat much all day and then have a chip supper. Charlotte ate the chips as that was all that was on offer and she was starving!

    I am now being told that I am feeding her too much in the day and I should force her to eat chips because they have proved that she will if she is hungry enough!?!?!!?

    Oh and then they rewarded her eating chips with a knicker blocker glory sundae!

    Is this a healthy way to bring up my daughter?

    Should I force her to eat chips if she would rather eat any meat, fish, vegetable, fruit, cereal, bread, pasta, rice that I put in front of her?

    She loves eating "clean" and she loves sweet things especially chocolate, her diet is definitely varied and I don't think chips and jelly sweets actually add anything good to her diet. - I have never taught her about eating clean, it's just the way she eats.

    I have just spent the last 3 weeks re-educating Charlotte about healthy eating after her school botched up that lesson!

    AND I am gratefull to them for making the room to take her on holiday.

    I thank you for the chance to rant and get it off my chest.

    I wouldn't feed my child fries everyday or ever force a child to eat fries. However, I don't think eating fries and ice cream while on vacation is the worst thing in the world. As a PP said, the aunts aren't "bringing your child up", they are taking her on vacation.

    I'm surprised she ate the fries at all, if she really didn't like them. In my experience, if a 6 year old really doesn't like something, she won't eat it. So, maybe she does like them, but pretends not to to make you happy? That's not a bad thing. I just wouldn't get too concerned about poor eating habits on a vacation.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
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    It doesn't sound like the aunts are "bringing up" your daughter. It sounds like they are taking her on vacation for a week. If she's not horrifically obese or diabetic, I see no harm in letting a 6 year old child have some fries and a sundae over the span of one week on vacation... Maybe I'm missing something?

    This.
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
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    "Is this a healthy way to bring up my daughter?

    Should I force her to eat chips if she would rather eat any meat, fish, vegetable, fruit, cereal, bread, pasta, rice that I put in front of her"

    I think you know the answers here. If its validation you want, yes you are right. Why would anyone suggest that you force feed your child french fries? thats ridiculous. At the end of the day she is your child and you will make the decisions on how she eats. I would not get too upset about it, they are only on vacation and its not the rest of her life. Just get her back into her routine and eating correctly and she will be just fine! Good eating habits are learned very early on.
  • Hypnobarbs
    Hypnobarbs Posts: 2 Member
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    hmm the only thing that disturbs me here is the part where you say she was starving and the chips were the only thing offered. I don't see anything wrong with eating "poorly" on vacation, but I am upset about the fact that they offered nothing to a 6 year old child until dinner time.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
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    Yes
  • Spartan_Maker
    Spartan_Maker Posts: 683 Member
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    If your concern is her blood sugar becoming elevated and insulin spiking, the "cereal, bread, pasta, [and] rice" could easily do as much harm, or more, as the chips and ice cream. "Cheese" won't affect either and will provide her with protein.

    In any event, if a kid can't have some french fries and ice cream on holiday, maybe we're defining healthy the wrong way.

    Just one man's opinion.
  • dlwyatt82
    dlwyatt82 Posts: 1,077 Member
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    In the long run, your kid will be fine. I'd be pretty angry with a family member who completely ignored my wishes in this type of situation, though (assuming they had been communicated ahead of time). Said aunties wouldn't be taking my daughter unsupervised again after that happened.
  • chljlleal
    chljlleal Posts: 230 Member
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    Yes I did want some validation, but to be honest I just used this forum as a way of screaming and not smashing something on my desk. My sisters in law and my sister have always tried to force their views on me and my family.

    A lot has changed in the last 12 months and I am now taking control of my life, and they aren't used to me doing things the way I think is best rather than theirs. The chip thing is just the latest.

    I know Charlotte will survive and enjoy her holiday and I will make sure my fridge is stuffed with all her favourite treats when she comes home on Saturday.
  • chljlleal
    chljlleal Posts: 230 Member
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    hmm the only thing that disturbs me here is the part where you say she was starving and the chips were the only thing offered. I don't see anything wrong with eating "poorly" on vacation, but I am upset about the fact that they offered nothing to a 6 year old child until dinner time.

    This is my point
  • SHBoss1673
    SHBoss1673 Posts: 7,161 Member
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    to answer your question...probably. I agree with most everyone above, if it's a one time thing (or close to it) then I see no problem with it. However, I don't feel like it should be her only option, if she wanted something better, then they should have fed her something better, if they didn't have the means or availability, then they weren't doing a very good job as guardians of a child to not have access to quality foods for her. they're adults and can eat what they like, but a child should be tended to.

    If she WANTED the fries, then fine, it's vacation, and (assuming she's healthy) she should have them. but if she doesn't want them, then shame on them for not giving her other options.

    In the grand scheme though, I wouldn't get to worked up over it. Maybe a quick word with them after the vacation is over, just letting them know that for the next time, please try to find out what she would want ahead of time so they can make arrangements. I'm sure they did this out of plane ignorance, not malice.
  • Kyrosh
    Kyrosh Posts: 238
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    hmm the only thing that disturbs me here is the part where you say she was starving and the chips were the only thing offered. I don't see anything wrong with eating "poorly" on vacation, but I am upset about the fact that they offered nothing to a 6 year old child until dinner time.

    ^ This! What's wrong with these people if they didn't have anything else to eat all day? I feel sorry for your daughter... I would ask the 'aunties' about it.
  • chljlleal
    chljlleal Posts: 230 Member
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    If your concern is her blood sugar becoming elevated and insulin spiking, the "cereal, bread, pasta, [and] rice" could easily do as much harm, or more, as the chips and ice cream. "Cheese" won't affect either and will provide her with protein.

    In any event, if a kid can't have some french fries and ice cream on holiday, maybe we're defining healthy the wrong way.

    Just one man's opinion.

    If she liked chips I wouldn't have a problem, I have tried to point out to her that chips (like most things) are ok in moderation. She just has never liked chips (which is weird 'cos I LOVE chips). If she had been offered Fish, chips and baked beans I know she would have wolfed the fish and beans and left the chips.

    The cheese thing I am working on! Currently trying to explain that there are sooo many different types of cheese out there that a blanket ban wont work. She will eat Marscapone and Parmeasan (excuse spelling) and knows they are a form of cheese I just have to find others that she likes too.
  • melduf
    melduf Posts: 468 Member
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    When you educate a child, you must keep in mind that someday, she will be on her own. She will have to make her own choices. The best you can do is give her a good start, a healthy way of life as long as she is with you and make sure she knows how to make healthy choices.

    Also, since she is YOUR kid (you're the one living with her on a daily basis), you have the right to set ground rules with the aunties before you allow them to take her on vacation. Afterwards, if they don't respect that, well, you will be in your right to be mad and put a stop to it.

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