I've changed my lifestyle... I want results NOW!

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kate4vt
kate4vt Posts: 20
in Motivation and Support
Maybe it's just this gloomy Monday morning, but I'm feeling a little down today.

On July 16, I decided to change my life. For real this time. Over the previous weekend, I saw a friend that I hadn't seen for about 3.5 years (before law school, before marriage). As soon as she saw me, she asked, "When are you due?!" I was mortified. I joined MFP and decided to make a change.

I've been so diligent these last 5 weeks. And as a result, I've lost 12 pounds. Already, I feel better in my clothes. Everyday, I envision me at my first goal (20 lbs down by a Sept. 22 wedding), my mid-point goal (40 lbs down by Christmas), and my final goal (85 lbs down by next summer). I believe that weight loss is 95% mental. And I'm finally there. Mentally and emotionally, I'm so ready. I want this so bad I can taste it.

My mental state has changed. Thus, I feel like I should be SEEING the change I'm feeling. Unfortunately, that's not so.

Pictures from this weekend were just posted on Facebook. I still look like a cow.

I don't feel like a cow, though.

Can anyone relate? I know, logically, it took me nearly 4 years to put on this weight. It's not going to come off overnight. But emotionally, I've made a huge lifestyle change. And I'm SO eager (and impatient) for everyone ELSE to see the results that I feel. I'm trying hard today to not get discouraged.

Replies

  • therealangd
    therealangd Posts: 1,861 Member
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    12 pounds in 5 weeks is awesome. Congrats.

    "I've changed my lifestyle... I want results NOW!"

    I really think you need to think long and hard about this statement. You can't have your cake and eat it too. If you've changed your lifestyle, you wouldn't have the mindset of needing immediate results.

    How do you want to live the rest of your life?

    You said you don't feel like a cow. That's awesome. That's great. Let that be your guide. Keep doing what your doing. Just change the mindset. This isn't a race. The results will come.
  • elliceck
    elliceck Posts: 3 Member
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    I completely understand. i too have lost 13 lbs, so right close to 12. I have a family wedding this weekend, and I still was the biggest of the siblings and hated every picture of myself. I felt so good in my clothes when I got dressed and they fit better and then was so sad when the pictures didn't show any of my weight loss only my weight. It is tough. I guess we just have to give it time. I understand though. Since I am making progress I feel like I should have more to show for it than a number I know but no one else can see.
  • wlkumpf
    wlkumpf Posts: 241 Member
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    I went to our fair this weekend. I was looking around at the style of jeans I can't wait to wear and the body type I want. I used to look at the super skinny people and either be jealous or pawn it off to good genetics.

    NOW, when I see someone skinny I think they must make good choices and tell myself that is going to be me next year! I will keep making good choices and substitutions and keep my slow weight loss going. I want to lose this weight I gained over time in a lifestyle and sustainable way. No shortcuts and no excuses! 1/2 lb to 2 lbs is the most you should aim to lose in a week. The earlier weight does usually come off faster though.

    I also found the opposit of what i thought to be true. In order to lose this weight (I excersize 3-5 days a week hard!) I NEED more protein and don't have to just have lots of vegies! I need to eat some of my excersize calories back or the scale will barely move. I want to be healthy and skinny fit, not skinny fat. I want to be able to do a 5k or more and be a physical challange to those around me! I want to be toned, not just a number on a scale!

    Good luck! I think your 12 pounds was pretty fast! If you keep losing and not gaining you will eventually hit all your goals. You can do it!
  • Briantime
    Briantime Posts: 175 Member
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    I think this is what makes weight loss so difficult for so many people; it takes so long...

    Especially when you see yourself every day, it's very difficult to see a difference when you start losing weight. I believe this is a big reason why so many people give up. They try in earnest, but feel like they are suffering for no good reason when they cannot quickly see results. I'm no different and even when I lost 50 pounds a few years ago, when I looked in the mirror, I still saw a fat guy. Everyone else thought I looked great, but I just didn't see it. Low self esteem? Maybe.

    You will get there. Believe it.
  • 4theking
    4theking Posts: 1,196 Member
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    You made a change on the inside already. It will just take some time for your outside to catch up. You are a different person now and it's just a matter of time before other people notice it. I have been working at 'me' for 3 1/2 years and I am still not where I want to be. You just have to learn to enjoy the ride :) Keep it going, you are doing awesome!
  • _TastySnoBalls_
    _TastySnoBalls_ Posts: 1,298 Member
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    yes, i still feel like a cow. But that's not an excuse to go back to not exercising and eating whatever i want. Don't give up!
  • jynxxxed
    jynxxxed Posts: 1,010 Member
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    I've lost 26 pounds and I still feel like I look the same.. though I also feel quite a bit different mentally. It's odd because none of my clothes are really fitting but I still feel like I look exactly like I did previously.

    I guess it's just going to take time. I'm not giving up because I know that EVENTUALLY it will all pay off and I'll see the drastic physical changes I'm seeking!

    You're definitely not alone though. :)
  • LeslieC1970
    LeslieC1970 Posts: 160
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    I can completely relate to how you are feeling. You have put in the work and want people to be able to see the result of your efforts. It will come.
    From my personal experience, I had to lose more than 20lbs before people would actually mention anything. Don't distress. You will get there and be amazing.
  • aaeros
    aaeros Posts: 157
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    Sounds like you got the right attitude, and determination.. Realize it's a journey and you are just getting started and think of the changes that will take place. And the look on your friends face next time you see her and all the weight you've lost!
  • BABetter1
    BABetter1 Posts: 618 Member
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    I totally understand. When I first started dropping weight, it was slow. But after the first several pounds came off, I got excited and started getting more active and eating even healthier, and then the weight really started to fly off for a couple of weeks. But, I knew that I was losing too fast. It was really hard to force myself to make some changes (mainly upping my calorie intake to match my activity level) so the weight loss would slow down to a healthy/sustainable rate. I loved that the weight was going away fast. But, I also wanted this change to be long term and healthy. Plus, I'm hoping that the slower rate of loss will help me to avoid some of the excess skin that I'm likely to have when I reach my goal. So, I'm with you. I FEEL thin right now. But, when I see pictures or look in a mirror, I still LOOK heavy and flabby.

    Wouldn't it be awesome if we could just flip a switch and be at goal weight and already in maintenance mode? Sure it would. But, like a previous poster said, wanting instant gratification is probably a big part of what got us in bad shape to start with. Just hang in there, and we will get to where we want to go in due time.
  • kate4vt
    kate4vt Posts: 20
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    Wow, thank you. I expected to get some mean comments about this one, so I'm glad to see that I've got nothing but sympathizers and supporters.

    Knowing I'm not alone in this really does make all the difference.

    I simply need to remember why I'm doing this: for myself. It's easy to get wrapped up in wanting to receive immediate gratification from OTHERS. But the reality is that I AM receiving immediate gratification in that I already feel better about MYSELF.

    Thanks for the support on this gloomy Monday!
  • GuineaMother
    GuineaMother Posts: 59 Member
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    I so know how you feel. If one more person offers me a seat on the train I'm going to cry! :sad:
    Sometimes it makes me feel mad and I want to shout 'I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat, ok?!' but then I remember that they're just trying to do something nice, and it's my own fault that I look pregnant.
    Got on the scales today and after a week of being so so good, every day, turning down the office cakes and dinner invites, I've only lost a pound. Feels like it should be more, doesn't it? But that's the nature of the beast.

    What makes me really mad is when I see skinny gorgeous girls eating a giant doughnut or something, and I wonder why it is has to be so easy for some, and so hard for me.
    But that's when MFP comes in handy! It's by no means just me, loads of people have struggled and are now putting their all into changing things- and you're one of them! Celebrate that. You've started, and that's the hardest bit. You totally will get there, but only you can do it. Stay strong, chat to people here when you feel bad and give yourself little (non-food!) rewards for every week that you lose weight, no matter how small.

    Good luck, and add me if you want a fellow non-preggers friend!!
  • dmh0204
    dmh0204 Posts: 81
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    12 pounds is awesome. Think of how you will feel 12 pounds from now.

    It sounds like you've made a change, which is really great, and that it is working for you. But, focusing on the need for immediate results is more likely to derail you than motivate you. Remember, you haven't made a temporary change, but a permanent change. All you need to do is keep eating better and exercising more, and you will eventually lose the rest of the weight. And the best news is that, as long as you stay on track, it won't take you the 4 years it took you to put it on to take it back off again. But it will take you longer than 5 weeks.

    Whenever you feel down about how you l look, go for a run. The endorphins will boost your mood, and you will be that much closer to your goal.
  • Halleeon
    Halleeon Posts: 309 Member
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    I understand and have felt how you are feeling now (and will probably feel that way again.) The best thing I can say may sound a little blunt, but it's what I would tell myself. Try relaxing and stop obsessing about fat loss. If your mind is restless try focusing on something more positive than beating yourself up. Take a photo and compare it against an older photo at a higher weight. Record your inches to see more changes. Read some affirmations. Start a different exercise routine to switch things up a bit...hell, go exercise and get some endorphins running and chase away the gloomies.

    Hope you feel better.

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