I've lost it and don't know how to get it back!

I just need some advice on how to get my motiviation back. I've been going along great for a little more than a month, lost 12 lb, gave up diet pepsi totally, exercising, generally feeling great. Then last week I lost it somewhere. I've been struggling eating the "right" foods, stuggling to get my butt moving. I don't want to lose my motivation and I know that people do this all the time, lose the motivation and don't get it back for a long time and I DON'T want that to happen. Is there a way to work through this, force your motivation back? I don't want to just wait to see if it comes back but it seems my mind and body aren't working together on this!!! I'm just reaching out for some help, advice :flowerforyou:
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Replies

  • Sidesteal
    Sidesteal Posts: 5,510 Member
    I just need some advice on how to get my motiviation back. I've been going along great for a little more than a month, lost 12 lb, gave up diet pepsi totally, exercising, generally feeling great. Then last week I lost it somewhere. I've been struggling eating the "right" foods, stuggling to get my butt moving. I don't want to lose my motivation and I know that people do this all the time, lose the motivation and don't get it back for a long time and I DON'T want that to happen. Is there a way to work through this, force your motivation back? I don't want to just wait to see if it comes back but it seems my mind and body aren't working together on this!!! I'm just reaching out for some help, advice :flowerforyou:

    What is your definition of "right" food and why did you give up diet pepsi?

    The list of requirements to lose weight is very small. There's a chance you are making this list much larger than it needs to be and it is causing adherence issues.

    But, I'll wait for you to reply to the above before I make any conclusions.
  • SpecialKitty7
    SpecialKitty7 Posts: 678 Member
    it sounds kinda stupid, but i just imagine i have motivation. imaginary conversations in my head where i tell others i workout x days a week, i'm eating healthy, all that. it's kind of a fake it until you make it. as if i say it enough it will come true. then i do my best to live up to my imaginary self. it works about 80-90% of the time.
  • MommaKit79
    MommaKit79 Posts: 852
    Just keep pushing!! I get those times all the time but, jsut have to keep pushing. Try to have a CHEAT day fr those foods you are cutting out, including your Diet Pepsi on that day.


    GOOD LUCK!!!!
  • Pretending I walking with you today and lets get moving..............................I will be chanting right behind you that was 12 lets make it 13..............................................:bigsmile: :bigsmile:
  • drwgal
    drwgal Posts: 66
    Lean on the people you have on your friends list, and get a support system. I wouldn't rely on the forum to help your motivation. In fact the only motivation I get from the forums, is wanting to seriously punch someone in the face. Lots of a-holes here. And i'm not being mean, just being honest! :happy:

    Minus sidesteal, cranky or not, he is YUM!!! :laugh:
  • AmyFett
    AmyFett Posts: 1,607 Member
    I've lost mine the past few days, but I'm sick, so bleh. I can hardly walk or stand up without falling over lol, so I'm definitely not getting on mister elliptical feeling this way. I'm having a love affair with my bed. Fortunately, aside from this, I haven't gotten into a funk yet, but I'm sure I will. I just keep the junk-ish foods out of my house, except the snacks my kids have occasionally. I don't think they'd let me lose motivation, they'd yell at me lol.
  • lepow
    lepow Posts: 92 Member
    The only advice I can give is keep doing it. Force yourself. Fake it 'til you make it, basically. I've had this happen a lot, and even though I struggle to eat all the right food and exercise, as long as I log EVERYTHING (even if it's BAD - especially if it's bad), that gives me the motivation to keep going. When I have a bad week, I look at my numbers (macros, calories, weight) and see it so horrible, that makes me want to do it better. It's almost like when I used to get a bad test score in school - it was motivation enough to do better next time. I'm sorry, I know it isn't much help, but there it is.

    Also, I pull out my "before" pictures (the really bad ones that motivated me to start this journey in the first place) and scrutinize every detail of myself (maybe that's not healthy, idk). I also look at people around me (at the mall, on the street, at Walmart (especially Walmart lol)), and think "I don't want to look like that" - That's maybe not healthy either, but it's enough to keep me going so I DON'T end up like that, or I don't die at 50 from a heart attack. I hope maybe that helps. Good luck! Being here and wanting to do the right thing is a HUGE step in and of itself. :smile:
  • suemar74
    suemar74 Posts: 447 Member
    I usually just stumble through until it "clicks" again...doing whatever little things I can...whether it's going for a walk, taking the stairs, or choosing the grilled chicken over the fried.

    The best thing I can recommend is to keep coming here...keep logging in. Being exposed to people who have the motivated mindset will get you back on the right track faster than if you turned your back on MFP.

    At least that's what I've experienced.
  • cordianet
    cordianet Posts: 534 Member
    I think you may misunderstand motivation. Zig Ziglar once said: “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” The point being we don't get motivated once and forget about it. It takes constant work. So I guess the question is, what are you doing DAILY to motivate yourself?
  • BSchoberg
    BSchoberg Posts: 712 Member
    Struggling with the same issues myself... it's like it all just evaporated! Like, a week ago I could have moved mountains and now, blamo! Nuthin', nada, zippo...

    Going to the gym tonight for my favorite class - really hoping that helps! I know I'll feel great TODAY, but I want to get up tomorrow just itching to get my sweat on. *sigh*

    Wishing us both some major motivating mojo!
  • Really think about what your goals are and what outcome you want from everything. Then decide what you are willing to do to get it. Don't completely deprive yourself of everything you like. For example, I have made the decision that I will lose weight and get in better shape, I would not like going to a gym so I didn't incorporate that into my routine. But I am willing to workout doing the 30DS at 25 minutes a day. And I am willing to watch my calorie intake. Make small changes. You can give yourself 30 minutes a day. And like someone else said, "Fake it til you make it!" If you don't want to be motivated pretend if you have to and eventually it will be real!
  • flsl
    flsl Posts: 75 Member
    Ah poor you. Do allow yourself to have bad days, but they only need to be a day long. Just remember you have already lost 12lbs thats a great start. Who knows where you ll be after another month, though they do say keep the weekly weight loss low for health reasons. (ie 1.5-2lbs a week)

    Sometimes it helps to focus on the positives, your diet should still be yummy and tasty and fun. There should be an element of enjoyment in food, I think, otherwise why put yourself through the torture. Also maybe refocus on why you, personally got motivated in the first place.

    Sometimes having a mantra which you repeat to yourself again and again can help, like 'I am a healthy person' or 'I am becoming healthier'.or ' I love what I am moving towards'

    I also think there can be a strange 'fear' in losing weight. It took me a while to get my head around that. I was always the curvy friend, I thought I stood out because of that. Now Id never want to go back

    Positive vibes!
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    Maybe having a diet Pepsi each day will help your motivation. If you feel deprived of the things you enjoy, it's hard to stay focused. If you don't enjoy your diet, then find one you can enjoy.
  • kazoooo8
    kazoooo8 Posts: 71
    thank you all for the input. Its nice to know that I'm not the only one that gets this way and that it won't be lost forever!! Not that this is my first go around with diets, lifestyle changes, "programs", whatever we need to call it. Gawd no, I've "done" it all but this time, a few weeks ago I thought "this is the healthiest I have felt in soooo long" because I wasn't doing some magic pill, some restrictive 500 calorie diet, some magic program.... basically the good ol' calories versus exercise. The changes I made are a little restrictive because I have to limit what I put in my mouth! lol I'm eating good for me foods, not fast food. I gave up diet pepsi because it was alsmost like a drug or alcohol to me. After reading alot about the artificial sweetners and chemicals in it, I decided it was best for me to just give it up. Almost like an alcoholic, I can't just drink 1 every now and then. I was drinking more than 2 liters a day!! I don't really feel like I miss that as much as I thought I would.

    LIke someone else wrote, I just woke up one day and didn't feel as excited as I was about this and I really don't want to lose the "good" feeling. Before I would've just said "Oh well, that didn't work for me" and went to McDonalds. This time is different and maybe just talking about it helps. I guess that why we all come to a "community" and why it feels good to have support.
  • Have you tried changing exercise?
    I found doing something different to what I had been really made me more likely to go out and do it.
    Also found that walking is like free calories burned looking at pretty scenery in the sunshine…
  • wlkumpf
    wlkumpf Posts: 241 Member
    Every now and then I think, well I wasn't that unattractive before... i' still got complements... I really liked my habits before... I am spending a lot of time I could be spending with my friends... I miss my "treats"
    Then I realize... I want to be able to challenge myself physically and feel fit and not winded! I want to wear clothes and feel attractive! I don't want to give in to the negative thouts I have a few times a day when most of it is still positive! I don't want to make excuses anymore. I don't want to see the skinny athletic chic and assume she has great genetics, I am going to be honest with myself and instead of calling her a b**** behind her back for her luck, I am going to assume she had hard work behind that and motivate myself to do the same because I want that!
  • skinnyone2012
    skinnyone2012 Posts: 88 Member
    Congrats on giving up the soda. You fell off the wagon. Now you have to blindly just do it. Just wake up in the morning and begin new. If you have things you cant control, then throw them away.. Good luck.
  • flsl
    flsl Posts: 75 Member
    Well done on giving up the diet coke. I have a similar issue with coffee. I know it doesnt make me feel good but I still feel I need it. Someone said that (similar to above) that you shouldnt deprive yourself of all treats, but I wouldnt mind if the treat made me feel better, not worse!

    I have managed to cut down on coffee from 4 cups to 1 cup a day. Recently though it has started to sneak up again.

    But your achievement is very motivating for me! Ha! You dont have to be a perfect candidate of motivation to inspire others. We are all human :-) and we can all start again after a bad spell.
  • mrsains
    mrsains Posts: 104 Member
    Remind yourself of your goals! Why did you start changing your lifestyle in the first place? Imagine yourself hitting those goals and enjoying the feeling!

    Don't fully deprive yourself! If you can't maintain what you are doing now for the long run, you need to change something! Allow yourself a bit more leeway without beating yourself up. It's the overall choices that add up.

    Change your exercise routine! Find something that you really enjoy, like a new fitness class or joining a recreational sports team. Get excited about working out!

    Good luck :smile:
  • BrownDogFudge
    BrownDogFudge Posts: 3 Member
    Do you exercise with a friend? That is the biggest motivator for me. Any success I've had in the past was when I was walking with someone or lifting weights with a friend. Those days when you don't feel motivated (and I think we all have felt that way) are dealt with when your friend is planning on coming over at 6pm to lift weights. You can't really back out on a friend. Once the exercise starts, you feel good about it, and a habit begins to develop. Is there someone you can go through this fitness journey with? Good luck!
  • Motivation is actually at the core of everything you are doing right now. I'm actually starting to struggle a little in this area as well. Even after 154lb weight loss. it's so easy to slip back into your old way of thinking -- especially when you hit your goal weight. But the key is to keep in front of you the REAL reason you are getting into shape. For me, it was the desire to present my physical body as a living sacrifice to my Creator. To be in the best shape possible and to remove all the excuses that I had for not fulfilling my truest potential in serving Him. It's unbelievable how the deepest of motivations keep you from having "Cheat" days...keep you on the treadmill for one more hard lap, keep you lifting and eating the way that our bodies were designed to do. Hang in there.
  • reggie2run
    reggie2run Posts: 477 Member
    Motivation is an easy thing to get, but very hard to keep. There are days when I don't want to exercise, when I'd rather stay in bed and not get up at 5am, but I know if I dont get up and exercise that I'll feel like crap for the day and I'll feel guilty that I didn't exercise. They say a habit develops after 3 months. So keep at it for at least 3 months even if you don't feel like it. Soon exercising will be like brushing your teeth...second nature. Good luck!
  • When you keep going when you really don't feel like it is what separates the girls from the real women! Come on, most people would rather not get all sweaty but remember that awesome feeling when you lost those first 1 or 2 pounds and you were on your way? Get someone close to you - husband, friend, children - to make you accountable. My husband walks with me every day after work. He walks FAST so it really pushes me. He also knows I go to the gym 3 days a week and he always ask me on Mon, Wed & Fri if I worked out. Ask for help. It is hard to do but sometimes you need an extra push. Add me as a friend if you want. I'll keep you accountable.
  • areufnkiddingme
    areufnkiddingme Posts: 99 Member
    I always find that it's helpful if I sit down and write out reminders to myself of why I started this journey. When we're feeling motivated, we often have a list of reasons to keep us going, but if we don't provide ourselves with constant physical reminders of those reasons, it's easy to lose track of them or enthusiasm for them.

    Also- make sure you are not depriving yourself too much of the good things. Giving up Diet Pepsi is GREAT for you- no more noxious chemicals! but make sure you are saving yourself room for the small treats that make life rich, too. Also, practice self-forgiveness. There is a fine line when it comes to forgiveness between admitting you made a mistake and starting over again the next day, and repeatedly letting yourself make a mistake. All too often we get into this cycle of skip-a-day/guilt-yourself/run-from-guilt and end up "forgiving" ourselves as a way to just stop feeling bad. When that happens, we haven't actually dealt with our feelings and they carry into the next day. It is important to remember that a little indulgence is not the end of the world- its the NEXT DAY that counts. Don't let one bad day turn in to one bad month. You've got twelve pounds already- thats a great accomplishment! Just keep focusing on how good it will feel when you can say "and then I lost 12 more after that!!"

    Keep up the good work! It's great that you are reaching out- I hope you can do so in your personal life too!
  • tigerlily_82
    tigerlily_82 Posts: 41 Member
    I think you may misunderstand motivation. Zig Ziglar once said: “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” The point being we don't get motivated once and forget about it. It takes constant work. So I guess the question is, what are you doing DAILY to motivate yourself?



    Wow, this is awesome thanks for sharing this!
  • NuniaBidness
    NuniaBidness Posts: 1 Member
    I can certainly empathize with your Diet Pepsi problem, because I was addicted to Coke - the real thing (not diet, that is) and had at least one a day. One thing that helped me is Republic of Tea's Hibiscus Teas. (No, I'm NOT marketing this, I don't even know if you could.) BUT! The tea is yummy and slightly sweetened already with Stevia. My favorite flavor is Apple Vanilla, and I drink it iced in the summer but it's also good hot in the winter. They have tons of other flavors and tons of different types of tea, but I recommend the hibiscus teas because not only are they good, but there are indicators that it helps lower your blood pressure, and it's cooling and refreshing. Good luck to you!
  • mjterp
    mjterp Posts: 650 Member
    Been there, done that. I immerse myself in the success stories. There is a motivational video on you tube that I keep in mind. I force myself to take a good look at myself in the mirror every morning. But mostly I put a call out to MFP friends and let them know that I am struggling for that extra boost!

    Remember, this is about living life more healthy. It isn't supposed to be drudgery. The way I have accomodated that is by adding one healthy new habit at a time. It doesn't get overwhelming that way AND I have time to adjust. Movement has been my biggest challenge to date. I keep trying to find something that I will LIKE and really WANT to do. In the summer it is swimming. Currently I am trying Couch to 5K on my treadmill with the hopes of eventually going outside. ONE babystep at a time. I'll fall...and get back up. Just because I fall doesn't mean I can't do it. It means I need to practice and build myself up until I CAN!

    YOU CAN DO THIS!
    Hang in there!
  • lifesazoo
    lifesazoo Posts: 118
    I think we all lose motivation in some way. I couldn't agree more that we have to find motivation daily. If this were an easy process, there would be no overweight people in the world. What helps keep my motivation is to read the success stories on here and learn from what worked for them.
  • beansprouts
    beansprouts Posts: 410 Member
    You made an excellent start! But...Do you want to know what I think...truthfully?....It sounds like a head game (going on in YOUR head)! Are you AFRAID of succeeding?
  • aholly70
    aholly70 Posts: 577 Member
    It happens to us all,back you need to get back on track to get results,you will regret it later.Feel free to add me.