My Success Story

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nursing23
nursing23 Posts: 75
in Introduce Yourself
Let me start off by saying it is very hard for me to share my story with people. I trust you guys on mfp as a family.
I have BDD Body Dismorphic Disorder
This disorder changes your perceptions to make you think you are bigger than you are and cause extreme social anxiety and depression.
I would not hang out with anyone anymore because I decided I was so fat I didn't deserve to be cared about by anyone.
I quit my job, I quit my sport, I stopped doing well in school. Life just ended for me because of my obsession with my weight. I was so depressed that I was fat that I would not work out because I had convinced myself I would never change. I was broken. Completely and utterly broken.
April 14th 2012 I decided that I was too disgusting and dispicable to live life anymore. I blacked out my windows in my room and decided to take all the anxiety medicine in the bottle and then all the depression medicine. I layed down crying and was ready to leave my life on this earth.
My 11 year old sister was down stairs singing. I suddenly jumped up and tripping one foot over the other because of the drugs, ran to my moms room and scrame " Mom I don't want to die I just don't want to be in pain anymore!"
I was immediately rushed to the hospital.
God gave me a second chance. I lived.
And ever since that day it has been an on and off struggle to live life.
I have not been motivated enough yet to start working out but now I'm ready.
This Monday August 27th I will start counting my calories and working out. I am ready for my life to truely begin. I am at a stable place in my heart and am ready to be at a stable place in my physical health.
And you know I used to hate people and be so jealous because they were skinny , they got it easy. They had no clue what I went through because of being over weight. But now I pity them because you know what. I have the advantage . Instead of looking at my weight as a burden. Its a gift ! The trials and difficulties I have to go through to be healthy might be the hardest thing in my life. But I get to look back at what I will have accomplished and have a new found strength that those "skinny" people will never have. This journey is precious and I'm extatic to start it. That is my success story. The first of many to come.

Replies

  • nursing23
    nursing23 Posts: 75
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    Only encouragement welcome
  • farroz
    farroz Posts: 51 Member
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    Welcome and thank you for sharing your story.
  • JessFehr
    JessFehr Posts: 27
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    God always gives us a second chance. :)
  • mccbabe1
    mccbabe1 Posts: 737 Member
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    wow!.. your story brought me to tears... I am glad you are in a new mind set and determined... I hope you are also going to counseling of some kind and getting help along wth mfp... and yes love yourself.. love others.. regardless of size or looks.. and those "skinny people" u see and think dont have a clue what its like.. well u dont know cuz they could have been 300 #'s a year before that.... (for example) we all have battles in life.. weight or not weight...and we seek God to make us stronger... or we fall deeper and deeper into the 'pit' of our own distruction... im glad you came out of your "pit" and seeked help.. and are moving forward
  • Shy_girl89
    Shy_girl89 Posts: 15
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    You can do this :)
  • nursing23
    nursing23 Posts: 75
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    Thank you !
  • farmwife3815
    farmwife3815 Posts: 326 Member
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    You can do this. You came through all of the other stuff and know you will do this. You have a ton of support and your MFP family!! You got this!!!
  • Masonless
    Masonless Posts: 139 Member
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    What a touching testimony. Thank you for sharing. God gives us many chances....not just one or two. Praying for your healing and success daily.:smile:
  • chljlleal
    chljlleal Posts: 230 Member
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    Thoroughly moved by your storey! Praying for you.

    Good luck with everything that comes your way.
  • patfyfe
    patfyfe Posts: 17
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    You have taken the first step which is always the hardest, with the support of your family you will come through. Thank you for sharing your story as it must have been very difficult but sharing, hopefully will make the journey easier. Good Luck and God speed.
  • tosmoothash
    tosmoothash Posts: 187 Member
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    Thank you for sharing your story with me (& us). It takes a lot of courage to tell people that you have depression and anxiety. I don't like to use the term suffer because we're not suffering from it any longer. I am so glad that God gave you a 2nd chance and just know that God gave you this life because you ARE STRONG ENOUGH to live it. I'm praying and rooting for you!!!! You will win the battle of the bulge...it will not defeat you!!!!:drinker: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • ladydee78
    ladydee78 Posts: 3
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    wow what a testimony.. keep your head up. you have been through a lot. and this journey to weight loss and better health is hard but so rewarding in the end. i am always here for encouragement if you need it. i dont know if you go to church or not but i heard you say God gave you a second chance. God is awesome. i know its easy for everyone to say hang in there and dont give up but i myself know how hard that truly is but it is the truth. when you think you cannot go on, pray and ask God for the strength. i always have a scripture to help if you need it...
  • westn
    westn Posts: 18 Member
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    Wow this is a amazing story. I'm so grateful for God using your little sister to bring you back to reality. That was God granting you a second chance at life. You are a child of God, believe that! You are going to touch so many lives with this testimony. I give God all the glory for this event. Don't ever be ashamed where God has brought you from. Keep your head up and stay around positive people that are striving like you and I. I'm here for you if you ever need someone to talk to.

    Luv

    Nicole
  • RJBigDreams
    RJBigDreams Posts: 1
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    A truly touching story. I wish you the best of luck on your journey to losing weight :)
  • julianatalie
    julianatalie Posts: 20
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    A lovely story....you can do this xx

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