Feeling Frustrated

I recently (just this week) upped my calories to 1500. I upped because I have been binge eating for the last 6 months. I used to net 1200 for nearly a year, which was super easy with a stressful job that destroyed my appetite. Well now I switched jobs and this one has way less stress, but I am not sure if it's boredom or eating so little for so long that has triggered the binge eating (eating 2500+ cals in one sitting several nights a week or in a row). I have gained 15 pounds and feel horrible. The worse I feel the more I eat except for tonight. I bought a corset that should have fit 6 months ago. Tonight, I have over 2 inches that I cannot lace. I don't feel like bingeing I just feel disgusted with myself bingeing in the first place.

I don't usually post in the forums but I lurk a lot. Tonight I just feel like posting to people that may or may not care that do not truly know me.

I have read that eating below my BMR is unhealthy. I am 5'1" 26 years old and now weigh136. I upped my calories to 1500 and plan to exercise 6 days a week. This will create a slight deficit supposedly enough to lose over a long period of time. I really want to go back to eating 1200 calories. I know that is what dropped my weight before. I had tried for so long to lose weight then I finally dropped from 145 to 120! It was wonderful! Then I was an idiot and gained most of it back in a 6 month period.

My conscience is telling me to stick to my new plan. My idiotic vanity is saying don't exchange the corset--use it as fuel to drive you on only 1200 cals a day to fit in it by the end of October (when I am going to the Renaissance Festival).

Ok pity party over for the most part. I am going to bed so hopefully I can go to bed and wake up to work out before work.

I will be listening to my conscience by the way. Since I have upped my calories, I have not binged once--only a few days since my last Hulk out on food incident but I have felt better than I have in a long time.