Struggling with weight loss. I feel like giving up.

I'm 5"4 and 145 pounds.
I was so decided on making a change in my body and lifestyle about 1 and a half years ago. Got a gym membership. I was 138 lbs back then. I dropped to 131 lbs last summer, and throughout the stressful school year, went up to 145 lbs.. This summer, I told myself I wouldn't quit again, and went down to 137, but it's September and Ion'm already 143 lbs. This is all just so very discouraging to me. I know I want a body that will rid me of my self-consciousness. It's ruled over me my whole life. For the entire duration of these 1 and a half years I've been dieting at 1200 calories and then binging the next day, or after a couple days of sticking to the plan. My boyfriend is coming to visit in November and I want to show him a girl who's confident, fit, and beautiful. An ideal weight for someone like me would be 120 to 125 pounds - please, I would even be okay with 130. Him visiting is sort of a motivator for me, but it never seems like it's enough and I binge anyway. How do I get myself on track? I think I need some real motivation here ):

Replies

  • yelsha93
    yelsha93 Posts: 32 Member
    It sounds like 1200 isn't enough calories for you. If its leaving you hungry try setting MFP to losing 0.5 or 1 pound a week. That way you will get enough food so you don't feel like binging the next day.
  • I don't know, my dear - but I clicked on your thread because I feel the same way. I KNOW I need to lose weight for my health, but it all seems like too much effort!!! I have weight associated sciatica and am heading towards long term health problems but STILL I can't get motivazted. Hey, what's wrong with me?!
  • I'd also recommend increasing your calories, especially your protein/fat intake. This would make you feel fuller and take your body out of the starvation mode.
  • Ahluvly
    Ahluvly Posts: 389 Member
    Fear not, I will help you!

    Today is a new day and the start of you turning things around....time to be positive!

    Your healthy weight range is 8st 5lb to 10 st 6 lb for your height. You fall within this so you are in fact healthy, so well done.

    Are you doing any exercise each week? If so, what type of activity and, for how long?

    You have to think about why you are wanting to lose weight? What I will say is, this needs to be for you and no one else as you are in control of your actions.

    My advice to you is, work out your TDEE using the following link.

    http://www.jillianmichaels.com/fitness-and-diet-tips/determining-your-AMR

    This value will take into consideration your BMR, daily activity level and the amount of exercise you do. Once you've worked out your TDEE, I'd reduce this by 10% and eat that number of calories a day....give it a good 2-4 weeks and see how it goes!

    Other tips I can give you are to eat regularly, eat as clean as you can and just cut the rubbish out! What you eat, shines on the outside!

    Hope that has helped!

    Sarah

    I'm 5"4 and 145 pounds.
    I was so decided on making a change in my body and lifestyle about 1 and a half years ago. Got a gym membership. I was 138 lbs back then. I dropped to 131 lbs last summer, and throughout the stressful school year, went up to 145 lbs.. This summer, I told myself I wouldn't quit again, and went down to 137, but it's September and Ion'm already 143 lbs. This is all just so very discouraging to me. I know I want a body that will rid me of my self-consciousness. It's ruled over me my whole life. For the entire duration of these 1 and a half years I've been dieting at 1200 calories and then binging the next day, or after a couple days of sticking to the plan. My boyfriend is coming to visit in November and I want to show him a girl who's confident, fit, and beautiful. An ideal weight for someone like me would be 120 to 125 pounds - please, I would even be okay with 130. Him visiting is sort of a motivator for me, but it never seems like it's enough and I binge anyway. How do I get myself on track? I think I need some real motivation here ):
  • TaylorsGranddad
    TaylorsGranddad Posts: 453 Member
    Hi read my blog.... we've all had wobbles, add me on here and I'll try to help, I don't judge either :smile:
  • If you are really serious about losing weight, the only way you can do it is to be really vigilant about what you eat and how much you exercise. You're going to have to be mentally prepared to stop yourself from over eating, which only you can do! If you're not motivated enough by your boyfriend, then do it for you!

    As my 9 year old sister says about doing her homework: "Don't talk about it! Just do it!"
  • chooriyah
    chooriyah Posts: 469 Member
    I agree with the posters above. You are being too strict on yourself on the 1,200 calorie days, leaving yourself hungry and depressed, which is bringing on the bouts of bingeing - both from hunger and just to make yourself feel better.

    What exercise are you doing? It seems like you are feeling quite down, and I'm sure that a half an hour cycle around a park, or an hour walk each day would work wonders.

    I also understand your privacy concerns, but I think you might benefit more from this site if you open up your diary and add some more friends - it's certainly helping me to be more accountable and think more about what i'm eating to have perfect strangers see what i eat each day (:

    Good luck! I really believe you can do it.
  • monicamcisaac
    monicamcisaac Posts: 35 Member
    Hi. Oh I've been there!! I think when you have only a little bit of weight to lose it's harder in a way, as your body is more reluctant to give up the flab and the weight loss is REALLY slow.
    Try eating protein and low GI carbs at every meal, 5 x a day. I've started eating like this over the last 6-8 months and it has honestly changed my life. Like you, I would stick to a diet for a few days or weeks, then totally go off the rails and binge on carbs and fat. If you eat low GI carbs and protein together you won't be hungry and you won't have cravings, you won't have the huge high of sugar that you get when you eat high GI carbs, which makes you want to eat more sugar, and so the cycle gets out of control.
    The cleaner you eat the less you want to eat junk. And the more exercise you do the more you want to do, and the less you want to eat rubbish.
    Just take one day at a time, if you have a bad day pick yourself up and start again.
    The mindset is the hardest thing to overcome but you can do it!!!
    Add me to your friends if you like and I'll offer encouragement!
    Good luck!
  • This sounds very familiar to me! I have tried for years to lose weight, but it's always been a small goal set for a time not far away, and I have rarely ever managed it. It's only when I accepted that what I really wanted was to really change my life for the long term, and that I wasn't going to get where I wanted by my next holiday, or that wedding coming up or something else, that actually it would be months, maybe well over a year of gradual progress. It's only when I accepted that that things started to work for me. I've been on this site for two months now, I have lost twelve pounds (which is 5 more than I lost in the 6 months preceding this when I was setting short goals and trying to knock off a few pounds here and there). Every day I find it frustrating because I haven't got to the point where I can buy new clothes yet, and I don't feel like I have got any of my confidence back yet, but I have to keep reminding myself that this isn't going to work if I want instant gratification, and I must keep going because I will get there in time, and hopefully once I get there I will have changed my life and my outlook forever.

    I know it's hard when you want to look good and feel good for a specific event coming up, but I'm sure your boyfriend would rather know that you are working on the long term goal, and that you are confident that you'll eventually get there.

    I hope this helps! Good luck! x
  • SusanLovesToEat
    SusanLovesToEat Posts: 213 Member
    College life is difficult, the new environment-new people, the emotional stress of leaving loved ones behind, the social eating, the stress of grades...

    I would recommend joining a group which is physically active. This will make you feel more secure and you won't be constantly undermining yourself with regard to your weightloss goals.

    I agree with roybot86-It wasn't until I'd given up entirely, given away all of my "skinny" clothes, bought fat clothes, and stopped "sorta" working out that was finally able to lose weight for good. I'm not sure why this happened but perhaps its because there was no pressure.

    So I say don't do it for the boyfriend-he likes you just the way you are, or to fit in with the "skinny" girls, or to feel less fat and self conscious about your body as these insecurities don't go away because you lose 10 pounds.

    Make friends with people who build you up and when your head is right then you can rest assured you will gain control over your body. But whatever you do-NEVER GIVE UP!
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    Part of your problem is that you are within your target zone already, so you are going to lose weight more slowly than people with more to lose. I'm 5'4" have lost 12 pounds and am at 143. I'm aiming at 130 pounds. My nutritiionist wants me to lose more than 1200 calories because she said I am starving myself.

    I'm in a stressful situation myself = I am going to be visiting my 92 year old mom for about a week and a half and she has memory problems. I'll be by myself because my brother is going to be on a cruise during this time. I'm trying to plan my meals so that I stay within a reasonable level. And I'm going to have my brother show me how to use his ski machine before he leaves on his trip.

    You probably need to aim at one half to 1 pound a week at your level. And you probably need to eat more than 1200 calories per day.
  • There are a millions of people who want to lose weight that’s for sure. However, many tried and a lot failed to do so, why? Because they lack one very important ingredient of a successful weight loss and that is motivation. Motivation is the most significant factor if you ever decide to lose weight because without it, you’ll just end up frustrated and depressed. And remember, depression leads to overeating; and overeating leads to weight gain. That means, if you are not motivated to lose weight, then don’t start because you might just end up gaining more weight than what you currently have.

    Motivation Tips:

    Tip 1: Think slim
    Tip 2: Surround yourself with slim people
    Tip 3: Be fair to yourself
    Tip 4: Weight loss is not a cure-all
    Tip 5: Eat when you’re hungry
  • carrieann1967
    carrieann1967 Posts: 45 Member
    Like some of the others have said increase your daily cals just a little, so you eat the same amount every day, don't think of it as a quick fix, do it slowly and surely and make it a habit to log everything you consume. You can have the odd day off for special occasions, but get back to it the next day. A loss of a pound a day or half a pound is a good way to go.

    Good luck
  • psuLemon
    psuLemon Posts: 38,426 MFP Moderator
    Based on your stats, if you are working out 5-6 days a week then you should be eating around 1800 calories. The bigger question is what is your exercise routine? Are you weight training?
  • haroon_awan
    haroon_awan Posts: 1,208 Member
    If you keep eating 1200 calories and binging the next day, why don't you eat 1600-1800 calories each day and give yourself a treat like some a hot chocolate or a bit of ice cream every day so that you don't need to binge?

    Just believe in yourself, be confident and surround yourself with like minded people and eventually you'll get there.
  • SuffolkSally
    SuffolkSally Posts: 964 Member
    I'd take everyone's advice about increasing your calories to a realistic level you can stick to.

    Making a weekly plan for your fodd and doing your shopping accordingly might well make it easier. Get lots of filling healthy stuff in, enough protein and lots of veg; but also allow yourself to have some of favourites. Just think moderation and keeping with calories, averaged over the week.

    Also try to find some form(s) of exercise that you enjoy, wether it's walking, team sports, zumba or weightlifting. It will lift your mood, motivate you, help with the weightloss and be great for losing inches.

    Good luck
  • lauren3101
    lauren3101 Posts: 1,853 Member
    Tbh, you are the classic yo-yo dieter.

    Please don’t take any of this as a criticism, because it is certainly not. I was in the exact same boat (and still am, occasionally) for many years.

    In my honest opinion and from personal experience, the only thing that’s going to make you lose weight is for you to want to be slim and healthy more than you want food. That’s it. There’s no magical motivator, it’s down to you.

    You can help yourself find it easier though. Maybe you aren’t eating enough calories, or you need to follow a diet. Or maybe if you like a binge, you need to workout more to ‘earn’ those calories. You need to find something that works for you.

    Good luck. :)
  • Motivation Tips:

    Tip 1: Think slim
    Tip 2: Surround yourself with slim people
    Tip 3: Be fair to yourself
    Tip 4: Weight loss is not a cure-all
    Tip 5: Eat when you’re hungry

    There really isn't a lot of practical advice here. She needs to eat more and be more active.
  • trixiemou
    trixiemou Posts: 554 Member
    Hi, I am 5'4.5, my starting weight on here was 148. I am however in a different age bracket.
    I slowly lost 8lbs using the 1200 MFP allowance, and actually managed not to feel hungry on that. After reading numerous articles on Starvation mode, Tdee etc I re checked my measurements on another site, I used fat2fit radio which gave me between 13-1400 cal daily allowance. So I did increase my daily allowance to 1300. I am trying to get my protein levels higher. Again this is a point picked up in other articles which said that protein assists with weight loss. So everything I do I try to do for a two week period to see if it works, if it doesnt I try something else. Increasing my cals even by 100 then eating back some exercise calories seems to be working for me.

    Your doing well but finding out what is right for you can be a slow process, just don't give up, its not impossible.