Why do you think some people are scared of success?

BeautyFromPain
BeautyFromPain Posts: 4,952 Member
in Motivation and Support
Discuss...

Replies

  • persephone87
    persephone87 Posts: 220 Member
    Success in life or in weight loss?
  • TheBiggestLosee
    TheBiggestLosee Posts: 101
    The first time I ever heard someone ask this question, it made absolutely no sense. Why would anyone be afraid to succeed? After thinking about it on more than one occasion, the only reasonable response I could think of that person who has that image of success in their mind -- is fearful things may not be as how they envision it. You hear or read about celebrities who've become successful and say while they are living their dream, things are still difficult.

    Pessimism outweighs optimism. That's my guess.
  • BeautyFromPain
    BeautyFromPain Posts: 4,952 Member
    Success in life or in weight loss?

    Both
  • persephone87
    persephone87 Posts: 220 Member
    As far as in weight loss because they are scared of change. They might want to succeed but there are drastic changes that need to be made and some people who don't get any support might just think why am I bothering and get into a depression.

    For working life for me I want to be successful, but at the same time I'm scared because I doubt my own abilities, with success comes responsibility and you need to make decisions which will affect other people not always in a good way and I wouldn't want to do that. Also if I made a decision and it was the wrong one I'm the type of person to beat myself up about it. Some people just don't want success and are happy to plod along.
  • cramernh
    cramernh Posts: 3,335 Member
    Because negativity is all they have known. Sometimes its easier to accept the negativity because that is all you received... to receive positive feedback or comments would put them in a place where they think 'hey buddy, go screw and stop messing with me".. often the positive feels like sarcasm...
  • gr82run
    gr82run Posts: 48 Member
    Sometimes that's really hard to figure out if you're the one who self-sabotages. I've been maintaining my weight loss over a year, and recently have gained 6 lbs. I really never got to my goal which was 5-10 lbs less. Every time I'd lose 2 or 3 lbs, I'd quickly regain it. I don't know why and really tired of trying to figure it out. And yes, I DO NEED to lose it!
  • SyStEmPhReAk
    SyStEmPhReAk Posts: 330 Member
    because it's human nature to stick to the status quo. not disrupt the ebb and flow of a normal routine. success means work - hard work - and some/most people are not willing to work that hard. this, i admit includes me to some degreee. there are many aspects of life where one can fear success. weight loss is one specific focus, but "life" is too general to define. one may be afraid of success in one aspect of life (i.e. relationships) but very deteremined to succeed in another (i.e. career).

    just my 2 cents...
  • Amberonamission
    Amberonamission Posts: 836 Member
    I can tell you why I have failed to succeed at completing my weight loss twice in the past. First reason; people who were previously rude to me or down right unkind would all of a sudden become super friendly. Even some of my close family would want to do things like take me out (something never offered when I was fat). I would get so angry and then depressed that the person I was was not good enough for those that I loved so much. I find that crushing to my effort.

    Second reason is that I would start to get a lot of male attention. I don't like it. Never have, Guys can be so gross.

    I am older now and I live very far from the conditional family members.. and pretty determined to get over myself.
  • x_JT_x
    x_JT_x Posts: 364
    I think partly because they think it's unattainable: Why set yourself up for failure? And partly because they believe it's fleeting: Even if I do make it, it won't last.

    Either one of those scenarios sets you up for a huge disappointment and damage to your self-esteem. It's easier to sit back and think it won't work than to put in all that effort and have nothing to show for it. It's a tough mind-set to have to work around.
  • amymichelle1226
    amymichelle1226 Posts: 150 Member
    I don't necessarily think people are scared of success....I think it's hard to get motivated, hard to change your ways even though you know it will result in something good. It's easier to keep doing what you're doing, I think most people are stressed about life issues in general, and having to invest time into something else is hard. That's why so many people look for an easy way out, a pill, surgery or a crazy diet...they want the success, they just have a hard time doing the work that it takes to get there.
  • chipper15173
    chipper15173 Posts: 3,981 Member
    i just had a fear wash over me this morning. i am getting ready to enter another weight range i haven't' seen in over 30+ years. it scares me. i think because people are watching me know to see if i can keep it off. the complements are hard to take sometimes. cause than you think to yourself "did i look that bad before?" when you have/had low self-esteem before. it's hard to change the thinking sometimes.
  • Dauntlessness
    Dauntlessness Posts: 1,489 Member
    For me, I think it was a way of coping with emotions. If I don't have food, how will I comfort myself?

    If I don't have the excuse of being overweight, what is holding me back from doing things I want in life?

    Me, challenging myself? What if I fail? Its easier not to even try. -this isn't me now but it used to be.

    Once my body image is normal, then all the focus is on my personality??? Oh damn...haha

    What if I get unwanted attention? I can barely look strangers in the eye now, I cant even imagine they approaching me. -This actually happened to me. People started talking to me, being nicer to me and some even hitting on me. It really messed with my head. I still don't like it and I get super uncomfortable. haha

    My world has been centered around food. If I am not known as the fat funny friend/family member who makes everyone awesome food , who am I?


    Just a few of my inner thoughts.
  • LadySylvanas
    LadySylvanas Posts: 133 Member
    I've been self sabotaging myself for years.. I've recently figured out that I actually have a fear of reaching the goal weight, or even a milestone. When I get closer to it, I start cheating. I don't know why but I won't let myself go any further. Don't know if it's the fear of unknown, or fear of not having anything to hide behind, or maybe because I'm so used to being invisible - when others start noticing me I get extremely nervous. Or maybe because I don't know how skinny feels. Well I'm not aiming for "skinny" but you know what I mean.. I've always been overweight and I don't know how I'd look like when I'm slim. Would my face change? Would my legs look ugly? Would my bum shrink at all? Would I have saggy skin? What if I look even uglier? I know it's silly but I keep finding myself worrying about these.. I'm sure it's one of the reasons why I'm not pushing myself to reach a milestone or the goal.
    I know, to most people this would not make any sense. But for me it's there and it's real. I always need to fight the urge to self-sabotage, and remind myself why I wanted to lose weight in the first place. I wasn't happy, I wasn't healthy, I wasn't beautiful. I was always the fat girl. But now I need to be strong and be ready to face my demons.
  • MaraDiaz
    MaraDiaz Posts: 4,604 Member
    If you were raised an American Christian it would be wise not to read the book your religion is based on. You aren't allowed to be successful in an American way as a Christian.

    Being rich is bad and may well doom you to hell. Being successful is something you are never allowed to be comfortable and proud of because nothing you do or have is through your own work and it's sinful to believe that you are anything but a filthy sinner who deserves nothing good in this world.

    So yeah. If you must inflict religion on your kids, be merciful and don't teach them to read Christ's actual words, because success and happiness are not permitted.

    I'm betting this post won't stick around long, because it's the truth.

Categories