How to get back on the wagon again!!!

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HSingMomto7Kids
HSingMomto7Kids Posts: 345 Member
in Motivation and Support
Okay I'm probably going to get a slap in the face for this question as I know just do it, but this is what MFP is about right!! I have totally fallen off of the wagon. I sit here and see the DVD in my DVD player and I am ready to work-out with no kids around as they are with hubby. Instead I find myself in tears of not being able to do it. I know I am in a bad place, and I need it but this other part of me says why..I don't deserve to feel good and what's the use as I always find myself in a bad place yet again. How do I just do it? I hate being swallowed up in this bad place in my life, but I keep landing here yet again. I have thought soo many times to just leave this place, but that would be sabotaging me. I guess no different than how I feel now. I don't even know exactly why I'm even making this post. I just want to stay in a good place I suppose and I am soo very sick of this. Plus, I figure how much worse could it get. I need to somehow crawl out of this hole. Thanks for listening even if nothing else comes of this post..

Replies

  • Starbuck2020
    Starbuck2020 Posts: 173 Member
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    Plan a new workout that you haven't done before. Tell yourself you are just going to do it for a few minutes and you can quit if you want. Odds are you will just finish the workout.
  • jarrettd
    jarrettd Posts: 872 Member
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    I am familiar with this territory. I wish I had some sage words of advice, some magic pill or quote-of-the-week. But it's just life, darlin'. You can try to be Super-Mom, Super-Woman, Rockstar/Pornstar/Julia Childs, all rolled into one, but it's gonna wear on you after a while. You don't need me to tell you that you are headed straight into a depressive episode, do ya?

    You can take a break, you know. Do something for yourself that you really enjoy, instead of beating yourself up over what you aren't doing. Delegate a few things to make some time for yourself. Schedule it. Put it on your calendar. You know if you don't someone else will get dibs on it or you will voluntarily surrender it because you're a mom. You always think someone else's needs are more important than yours.

    Make a bucket list. Things YOU want to see, do, learn, etc. Use your Mommy's Day Out to do these things. Take a macrame class. Have a coffee and read a book without interruption. Feed the ducks or pigeons. Go to a movie. Buy yourself flowers. AND DON'T FEEL ONE DAMN BIT GUILTY ABOUT IT!!! Consider it a mental-health NECESSITY!

    Put the kids in someone else's hands for one hour. Lock the bathroom door and light some candles. Run the tub full of lovely scented bubbles and turn on some music so you can't hear the yelling or breaking noises from the rest of the house. This is YOUR time. Do this whenever you are walking too close to the edge of that dark place. You'll be amazed at what an hour of having the bathroom to yourself can do!

    When you can do these small things for yourself that you WANT to do, it becomes easier to find the energy and will to do the things you need to do. You got this, momma. Hang in there!
  • LoraleiDean
    LoraleiDean Posts: 100
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    Personally, music always puts me in a better place.
    Why not try putting on your favourite music station and just start moving around the room?
    Chances are, you will start to feel a bit better (especially if a really good song comes on), and you will start moving even more.
    And it's excercise, right?
  • annabellj
    annabellj Posts: 1,337 Member
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    I wish I had an extra week and a few hundred bucks to be there. I cant obviously. all I can say is im always here for you. you know that. you have to want to do this again. its not just about the working out. its about being happy with you. go for a walk tomorrow. put the headphones on and just walk. you will feel better. but you have got to get out of the house. take them to your moms if you need to. and everytime you are starting to get down on yourself, think about what you are saying. would you say that to me? never ever! you are one of my most supportive friends. you love me for who I am with all my faults. please love you for all you are with all your faults. big hug for you.
  • jazzalea
    jazzalea Posts: 412 Member
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    Personally, music always puts me in a better place.
    Why not try putting on your favourite music station and just start moving around the room?
    Chances are, you will start to feel a bit better (especially if a really good song comes on), and you will start moving even more.
    And it's excercise, right?



    ^^^^^ THIS^^^^^^



    dance so you can fly baby!
  • HSingMomto7Kids
    HSingMomto7Kids Posts: 345 Member
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    Personally, music always puts me in a better place.
    Well I did listen to Jillian Michaels my favorite.
    I am familiar with this territory. I wish I had some sage words of advice, some magic pill or quote-of-the-week. But it's just life, darlin'. You can try to be Super-Mom, Super-Woman, Rockstar/Pornstar/Julia Childs, all rolled into one, but it's gonna wear on you after a while. You don't need me to tell you that you are headed straight into a depressive episode, do ya?

    You can take a break, you know. Do something for yourself that you really enjoy, instead of beating yourself up over what you aren't doing. Delegate a few things to make some time for yourself. Schedule it. Put it on your calendar. You know if you don't someone else will get dibs on it or you will voluntarily surrender it because you're a mom. You always think someone else's needs are more important than yours.

    Make a bucket list. Things YOU want to see, do, learn, etc. Use your Mommy's Day Out to do these things. Take a macrame class. Have a coffee and read a book without interruption. Feed the ducks or pigeons. Go to a movie. Buy yourself flowers. AND DON'T FEEL ONE DAMN BIT GUILTY ABOUT IT!!! Consider it a mental-health NECESSITY!

    Put the kids in someone else's hands for one hour. Lock the bathroom door and light some candles. Run the tub full of lovely scented bubbles and turn on some music so you can't hear the yelling or breaking noises from the rest of the house. This is YOUR time. Do this whenever you are walking too close to the edge of that dark place. You'll be amazed at what an hour of having the bathroom to yourself can do!

    When you can do these small things for yourself that you WANT to do, it becomes easier to find the energy and will to do the things you need to do. You got this, momma. Hang in there!

    Wow I am amazed!!! You got my ticket!! I am scared to hell where I am going, but having a hard time pulling me out too. You have got everything right. Everything you say makes sense. Thank-you for caring!! It truly means the world to me!!! Somehow I need to get me out of this. I thank god for friends like you here!
    I wish I had an extra week and a few hundred bucks to be there. I cant obviously. all I can say is im always here for you. you know that. you have to want to do this again. its not just about the working out. its about being happy with you. go for a walk tomorrow. put the headphones on and just walk. you will feel better. but you have got to get out of the house. take them to your moms if you need to. and everytime you are starting to get down on yourself, think about what you are saying. would you say that to me? never ever! you are one of my most supportive friends. you love me for who I am with all my faults. please love you for all you are with all your faults. big hug for you.

    I am not sure if anyone that already responded will see this message. I am in awww over all of the kind comments. And gosh my friends here are amazing!! I am in shock! How sweet of you! I am not even sure how to respond. I did not come here for the sweet words. I just could not pull myself up. A few of you that are already on my friend list and seeing that you care means the world to me. I am still shocked!! You are absolutely right in that I would not tell you what I tell me. But that is why I love my friends!!! I can tell them what I feel for them, but not me. I am still in shock that you care this much that you would care so much to even think to be in my state!!! I am floored really and truly!!!
  • Leahsz
    Leahsz Posts: 81
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    You sound like you may have depression - if so, please go see your doctor. I couldn't care enough about myself to eat properly and exercise until I got my depression sorted out (I'm now on meds). Plus, you have 5 kids! I have 2 and find that hard enough - you deserve (and need!) some 'me' time as others have said.
  • HSingMomto7Kids
    HSingMomto7Kids Posts: 345 Member
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    You sound like you may have depression - if so, please go see your doctor. I couldn't care enough about myself to eat properly and exercise until I got my depression sorted out (I'm now on meds). Plus, you have 5 kids! I have 2 and find that hard enough - you deserve (and need!) some 'me' time as others have said.

    Well yeah having a hard time and trying to get myself up again. Thanks!
  • pamperedpenguin
    pamperedpenguin Posts: 95 Member
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    I noticed you have 5 kids; I have 6. So I totally know those days of "why, what's the use?"
    I call this mommy burn out (actually its what my husband calls it cuz he's the one that has to pick up the pieces)

    It's hard for people that don't have a ton of kids to understand; you give it ALL to them and then just don't have anymore to spend on yourself.

    But you ARE worth it! If you think it might be depression, talk to a doctor. I suffer from it and was off medication for the summer and did nothing but sleep! Since resuming in August I've been able to get back on the "band wagon".

    Just know you are not along and each day is a new one, start over.

    Friend me if you'd like :)
  • melicharc
    melicharc Posts: 8 Member
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    I think the hardest part is to START. Well maybe the hardest part is to ask for help... either way Once you do it, its easier to continue. When I am down my music really lifts me up. I listen to Christian music and the messages are so positive that I cant help but smile. And a lot of it is upbeat so I can "rock out " and dance around my house. When we get down, feeding ourself with positive music, positive messages, positive people is very important. It is not about the weight it is about feeding our soul and our attitude. When we feel good we tend to treat our bodies better. So keep it positive.
    Blessings!
  • jcjammin
    jcjammin Posts: 26 Member
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    I don't know that I'm even competent enough or equipped to respond to this, but my heart aches for you and I would love to have the words to lift you up. Like other posters, I do find music helps me a lot and I also find that coming on here (MFP) and reading about peoples successes also helps keep me motivated. Do as much as you can, but don't give up.

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