Dunno what's up with me tonight...

TinGirl314
TinGirl314 Posts: 430 Member
in Motivation and Support
I'm feeling very ...apathetic.
I do have Borderline Personality Disorder...it might just be another fit coming on.
I've been kinda upset since a conversation with a friend yesterday...went along the lines of 'Just think! When you loose all your weight you can get a tummy tuck and look completely normal.'


Really?
I've lost 125 pounds...I have a LONG way to go.
I feel like it's a fight at every corner. The house I live in (with seven other adults) is always full of pizza and cakes, cookies...
9 times out of 10 I avoid it completely. I can't even get a friend to spot me at the gym.
Then today at the gym these guys were poking fun ... 'Poor treadmill' and stuff like that...
People are getting annoyed with me for going to the stupid gym (which...WTF I DON'T UNDERSTAND.)
Comparing my diet to anorexia...when I eat 1500-1700 calories a day..

I dunno it just seems like me trying to be healthy is making the people in my life miserable/jealous/mean.
Guh...need some support I guess.

Replies

  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,420 Member
    Some people are mean in general. Don't talk about it with them anymore. Most people mean well, though - they just don't always use the right words.

    The gym - that's a whole other problem. I've never seen that happen (mocking) at my gym. I'm so sorry you're having a rough day.
  • sheleen302
    sheleen302 Posts: 266 Member
    The issue at the gym is really baffling and I can see why it could affect you, if you decide to let it. You've handled the food issues and living arrangements well enought to have a 10 pound loss, and that's big--don't minimize it. YOU have taken control, now KEEP it. You can do it!
  • JohnMessmer
    JohnMessmer Posts: 536
    People often mock what scares them, they are afraid you will be successful because if you can do it then what is their excuse? As for the gym, I would politely ask them to keep their comments to themselves and I would make sure that the manager is aware. No one that is serious about getting into shape and staying there would mock someone else, because they know how tough it is. So I doubt those people would be their the next time anyway. You are doing great, keep moving forward.
  • T1mH
    T1mH Posts: 568 Member
    Wow the insensitivity of some people surprises me. Both the people your living with and the people at the gym. I think what your doing in spite of the people around you is pretty great and the best way thing you can do is to keep doing it. Not to prove anything to any body but because you deserve to be healthy. Don't give up on the workout, find another gym if you get no satisfaction from the manager of this one.
  • TinGirl314
    TinGirl314 Posts: 430 Member
    Thanks guys...
    I didn't mean to whine..I know I have to keep moving forward.
    It's just disheartening.
    You think 'Wow I lost 125 pounds, that's a person!'
    And then the world kinda...makes you feel like you've gotten no where.
    Blech.
  • mrs_joshica
    mrs_joshica Posts: 275 Member
    No sweetie, you will always find your "naysayers" when you are trying to do what is best for you and your health. Oftentimes, and I've found this to be true in my own life, when you start losing weight, you start gaining confidence and finding out who you really are, and what you are really capable of, and that fuels you, but douses the flames on "controllers". Many people like you down, and it is not until you start to get up, and see them trying to keep you down, that you find out who your real friends/family are. Try your best to resist the stuff that comes in to the home, and if need be talk to them about it and tell them how you feel. As far as the nitpickers at the gym, let them talk, they are NOT there for you, and you are NOT there for them, stick some headphones on, think about what you've accomplished so far, and rock it out 'til the wheels fall off, because you know what, if you let it stop you, it doesn't hurt one single person, but you. So keep going, keep your head up, and throw the rest, or shall I say the scraps, to the dogs.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,420 Member
    You have lost 125 pounds. Not only is that incredibly successful, but you've saved your own life. Well done. You know everyone here understands how incredibly difficult a task that is. Lean on your "friends" here. Others may never understand your struggle, but we live it every day with you.

    Totally understandable that you were upset. Just remember she probably didn't mean it to be an insult. People say dumb stuff all the time. I know I do.

    Whining allowed. :wink:
  • knight76306
    knight76306 Posts: 233 Member
    There will always be people who don't understand. My marriage actually fell apart after I lost a lot of weight (over 110 lbs.) People are either supportive or not. My family (dad & sister) have always been extremely supportive. Co-workers and friends? For a bit, but then after losing so much weight people forget. Now you can eat "normal". WTH is normal? So I can look like you? NO thank! I've gotten to the point where I just don't mention to people anymore. Have to say though - just getting back into the dating scene, makes for some akward situations. LOL
  • jessie1487
    jessie1487 Posts: 6 Member
    Have you looked at other Diets? there is a plan called Carb night solutions. :) should look into it it may help you reach your goal.
    and there are always going to be those people that dont think before they talk or act... and to get out and go to the gym! supper exciting! im a germ freak so dont go to them I seem to always walk out sick ( even after using wipes before and after) But keep up the hard work! you will one day make your goal despite what others may say! :D
  • BelindaDuvessa
    BelindaDuvessa Posts: 1,014 Member
    Thanks guys...
    I didn't mean to whine..I know I have to keep moving forward.
    It's just disheartening.
    You think 'Wow I lost 125 pounds, that's a person!'
    And then the world kinda...makes you feel like you've gotten no where.
    Blech.

    The world is jealous of success. Most people are too lazy, or too content where they are to achieve anything and when they see someone who has accomplished something truly wonderful, they have to bring that person down to their level. Misery loves company, remember?

    Just keep your chin up, and surround yourself with support, even if it's just us online. We're all there with you, I promise. Congratulations on all that you have accomplished so far. I know you can make it the rest of the way!

    I'd post you a picture, but I'm not at home, nor do I have a photobucket account. But it basically says' "No matter how slow you are going, you're still lapping the person sitting on the couch". Remember that any time you are feeling down. So long as you are doing something right, it will all fall into place.
  • TinGirl314
    TinGirl314 Posts: 430 Member
    Thanks guys...
    I've been looking into low carb diets...but I'll be honest I HATE them. I feel like crap after only a few days...I wonder if this is normal?
    I try to get most of my carbs from my fruit...I'd hate to give up my apples. :/
    I will probably end up doing one sooner or later....lol.
    I also sterilize everything at the gym.
    EVERYTHING. Lol.

    Yah it's hard cause my family isn't around so all I have is my friends...lately they haven't been around much either...or they're offering me junk food all the time.

    I don't think I would care at all..but I'm in a dark point in my life (Mental stuff that I won't go into on here...) and it's hard enough to do this when I don't feel like doing anything. ARGH.

    Thank you guys so much for the support, it means a lot. <3
  • marekdds
    marekdds Posts: 2,233 Member
    Don't let the "Debbie Downers" of the world get to you. Some people seem to love to criticize others. Ignore them. Come on here and we will pick you up. Marvelous job so far, be proud of yourself.

    BTW, I love my carbs, I eat lots of fruit & veggies everyday, hasn't affected my weight loss one bit.
  • luvsbks
    luvsbks Posts: 51
    :smile: I think people are scared that if you lose a lot of weight you are not going to be the same person you were before. 125 pounds lost is awesome! I had lost 160 pounds once,unfortunately I put most of it back on. Surround yourself with people who are supportive and forget the others.
  • kimberliiw
    kimberliiw Posts: 242 Member
    I'm really sorry people are such azzhats.

    You may be inspiring people though and don't even know it. When I used to bring my DD to daycare I would see this overweight young woman walking with her friends every morning. Gradually her friends dropped out but I would see her walking rain or shine. By the time my daughter left that daycare a year or so later that woman was a model of fitness. It was honestly awe inspiring to see her transformation. I'll bet there are people that see you and are inspired also.
  • mrs_joshica
    mrs_joshica Posts: 275 Member
    Yah it's hard cause my family isn't around so all I have is my friends...lately they haven't been around much either...or they're offering me junk food all the time.

    When someone knows that you are watching what you eat, and offering you the opposite of what you should have, and what they KNOW you shouldn't have, this is a problem. I don't want to say they aren't your friend, but this is what we call sabotage. They need to be supportive of your goals or move out the way, and you will have to make it clear.
  • ImprovingEla
    ImprovingEla Posts: 396 Member
    I have said it in another post, but I will say it again, cause it is true!
    No one hangs around in the gym, only to have a social hang out place!

    Those boys go there because they do not wanna look skinny anymore, the "skinny girls" go there because they care about their weight, wanna keep their body in balance or just to be able to eat something extra!
    And some go there to loose weight!

    Next time try to visualize how you smack them right where it hurts and then feel sorry for THEM, cause apparently THEY have to go to a gym to get also the look that they wanna have or wanna keep. ONLY they do not know that so apparently they have not half the brain or the heart for things you do!
    *hugs* I hope better times will come for you soon!
  • DoughHuSTLe
    DoughHuSTLe Posts: 11
    The 125 lb weight loss is awesome within itself so that alone is something to be very proud of. Keep on pushing and don't sweat the negative people.

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