I've sussed it - people want me to FAIL!

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Tebbspcad
Tebbspcad Posts: 233
in Motivation and Support
I'm surrounded by family, friends and loved ones - people who I honestly think want me to fail at being healthy, I know that they like me or even love me but why oh why do they keep wanting me to eat biscuits, cakes, chocolate or miss out a 'few' exercise sessions...has anyone else noticed this with their family?

A few examples: Yesterday my mum (bless her) got me two chocolate bars as she thought she'd 'treat me', i'm 38 I don't need treats (well ok maybe sometimes :bigsmile: ) - the kids loved them btw

This morning my hubby wanted me to stay in bed & cuddle instead of me exercising like I normally - I did but only for a few minutes - but then I feel mean and he gets all huffy :frown:

And today for instance my old boss has twice now put a cholcoate toffee on my desk, his excuse is that he was up getting one for himself so got me one aswell - ok fair enough, but he knows i'm trying to eat healthy - I put them back in the bowl without him knowing

At lunch I asked my husband to bring some wholemeal bread for me - nothing on it just bread, what did I get...A HUGE piece of chocolate covered chocolate cake & I mean huge (it could easily have over 1,000 calories in it!) as well as bread and some spread & crisps! I'm sure my boss would like the cholcoate cake, he loves cakes - so he'll be eating that then!

I love my family & friends but sometimes I think they are going to kill me with kindness - Sometimes all it takes is having that one chocolate bar or missing out on a days exercise and before you know it it's been a week & you've done nothing but binge & haven't worked out once - i know i've been there loads of times - BUT NOT THIS TIME!!

It's too hard to say no to my family without upsetting them and if it makes them feel better trying to make me fat again so I shall continue to accept these naughty foody gifts and give myself a huge pat on the back when I pass them on without even drooling or feel like i'm being deprived. - As I can honestly say I am happy with myself (not totally admittedly but so getting there) for the first time in too many years & no one can take that away from me :heart:

Replies

  • myfitnessnmhoy
    myfitnessnmhoy Posts: 2,105 Member
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    Who is doing this? You. Not your hubby, not your friends, not your family, not your co-workers. You. You and you alone are responsible for what you put in your body and what you do for exercise.

    I'd certainly talk to your husband about being more supportive. Then again, as a married guy who has a wife who likes to cuddle about once a week and actual "exercise in bed" about once a month to six weeks, cuddle time is a rare and precious commodity to some of us guys. Getting some of your exercise in bed isn't the worst thing in the world. But the bringing you extra food isn't helpful.
  • anwilson_83
    anwilson_83 Posts: 66
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    yes i know what you mean! my family is the same. then they are constantly saying im too thin,or that i starve....i most certainly dont starve. and im absolutely bu no means to thin. i am actually still a tad overweight and flabby. but anyway ,it drives me crazy! you should keep up what your doing,and politely decline all the treats. be happy and feel great about what you have accomplished. :)
  • SmudgerSmithRhino
    SmudgerSmithRhino Posts: 96
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    Hi,

    I know its not what you want to hear but I was reading that going, blah blah blah, CHOCOLATE BAR, blah blah blah CHOCOLATE TOFFEE , blah blah blah, CHOCOLATE CAAAAKKKEEEE!!!! Mmmmm chocolate cake.... :laugh:
  • cbrrabbit25
    cbrrabbit25 Posts: 384 Member
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    yep, pretty much EVERYONE around me is not supportive, except for my mom who is now on MFP also but it took a lot of pushing for me to get her to that point. (She still gives me cookies but at least now she makes them with whole wheat flour and less sugar and butter-I still don't eat them though :-) But everyone else is always like, "You don't need to lose weight, you are already skinny", or "One wont hurt, you have to live your life!" I can't stand it anymore and now i just use these people as motivation! I suggest this for you since there is usually no changing anyone until they see RESULTS! Its when those same people see me in a swim suit or something that they say, "Wow, you are really in good shape!" Oh ya, and 1 DOES hurt me. Once i start on the sugars and fat again, its like im addicted. It is easier if you don't eat those things EVER! Create your own snacks to crave. I now crave oatmeal over doughnuts! :-)
  • Tebbspcad
    Tebbspcad Posts: 233
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    Hi,

    I know its not what you want to hear but I was reading that going, blah blah blah, CHOCOLATE BAR, blah blah blah CHOCOLATE TOFFEE , blah blah blah, CHOCOLATE CAAAAKKKEEEE!!!! Mmmmm chocolate cake.... :laugh:

    They all know I have a thing with chocolate :love:

    It's so hard to say no at the best of times - saying that I still have this huge slice of chocolate cake sitting behind me (i've only not given it to my boss as he's still in a meeting!) - want me to bring some round? :laugh:
  • Gradia12
    Gradia12 Posts: 5
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    I can completely relate and much like you, my family, coworkers, friends all use to always buy/bring me food out of the kindness of their heart and we know they are not doing it because they want to see us fail but in some weird way they feel like they are showing us love? But I kept saying no the first couple of times were very weird especially with my family because they all give you the "look" or make comments but then eventually everyone started to get it. After a while they stop offering and now everyone knows that I'm the salad/vegetable eating, water all day family, friend and coworker. Like you, if I don't get in my exercise daily I am a complete grump and people say find a happy medium between the cuddle time and working out which is great but for me I let my boyfriend know there is no negotiating my workout. You have to do what works for you, so if that means maybe getting up earlier to get your workout in before hubby wakes up for cuddle time then that could solve that problem. But the bottom line is... if you want to see results you have to be discipline in both your eating habits and your workouts. Being healthy is a lifestyle change and it starts with changing your mindset and the people around you will know that you are serious about it.

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