Not Losing Weight.. need advice

jvrichardson
jvrichardson Posts: 7 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
My story is a little more complicated than I ate too much food, gained weight, and now can't lose it... so I am really looking for some non-traditional advice.

When I was in high school I was about 185, too many calories.
I joined weight watchers and started losing weight by eating a target calorie goal of like 1600 calories a day.
I got very excited... and dropped my calorie goal.. some days it was closer to 200-300 calories, no more than 600. Please spare me the guilt trip.

I lost weight down to 128 lbs within 6 months, which I maintained for two years at roughly 600-1000 calories a day.

Then I started on a birth control and gained 100lbs in two years with my calories between 1600-1800 a day.

Last year I stopped taking the birth control and dropped 60lbs in 8 weeks.. during which I also lowered my intake again to something like 200-400 calories a day because I noticed the first 15 lbs came off so easily after stopping the birth control.

My physician became very upset and we worked for six months to get me back up to 800 calories a day, and finally, a year later, I am at 1200 calories a day. However, I also now work out four days a week for 1-1.5 hours. 60 minutes of straight elliptical cardio at lvl 15-20 resistance depending on the elliptical, usually I max it out. The other portion of the workout is either weight training, stretching or (most often) calisthenics.

I am lactose intolerant.
I avoid gluten where possible.. I heard it might help. I do not have an allergy.
If I have caffeine at all it is less than 200mg a week.. and that is if I take a No Doz. I do not drink soda of any kinda, especially not diet.
I do not eat anything labeled "diet" or "fat-free". Sugar free and carb free maybe, but it's very rare.
I avoid butter, salt, mayonaise, sugar, carbs and fat wherever possible.

7am Breakfast I drink two cups of green tea with stevia. It is really, really hard for me to eat in the morning. I haven't ever been able to really do this... the green tea is a recent addition to hopefully get me to at least have something and also help my metabolism.

10am After breakfast snack is a 8-16oz bolthouse depending on if I can drink the whole thing or not.. usually I get full and I can't. Always the fruit or chai, never the coffee bolthouse.

noon I do eat lunch, but I can never eat the whole thing. If I have a 650 calorie sub I cut it in half... I get full.

4pm eat the other half of the sub, and am full again.

6-8pm sometime in between here I eat a light dinner, usually between 400-600 calories.

10-11pm I have a small popcorn or popcorn chips snack, or nuts, or something. I can't sleep without a small snack before bed. This may include a sugar-free Edy's natural fruit popsicle.


Usually I am at the gym from 3:45-5pm 4 days a week. That is the only time a day I can get there and I have to book it to make it at all. I would rather go in the morning, but my work schedule forbids that.


I am absolutely desperate to lose weight. Absolutely totally desperate and definitely in the frustrated phase to the point where I really am considering liposuction because I just cannot take looking at myself in the mirror anymore.

BMR: 1626 ( I do not know what this means)
BMI: 30.89
Body Fat: 27.28%

Current Weight: varies between 173-183, I weigh myself once a week. The above figures are for my weight at 183. (Should I weigh myself before or after working out?) My weight has always fluctuated that much.

My goal weight right now is only 155.. after I hit that and keep it for a while I will want to eventually get down to 140-145.

I have no problem working out and motivating myself to do so, but it gets hard after months of cardio and only gaining or maintaining weight... especially when I see everyone around me eating 2x-3x as much awesome food as I do. It just seems like if I eat more than 800-1000 calories a day I gain weight no matter what I do for exercise that day... I jumped from 176 to 183 lbs last week despite working out so much and eating 1200 calories a day.

I also take a pro-biotic with iron because I was anemic for a long time.. the pro-biotic also helps a lot with good bacteria as I do not eat dairy.


At this point, I am just not sure what to do. Everyone keeps telling me (like always) that I need to eat more. If I eat more, I gain weight pretty much immediately no matter how much I work out. I get very depressed feeling like I just can't do this.



Another big deal is that I do not really have a place to live where I can cook. I live with my boyfriend at his parents house and I do not feel comfortable cooking/dirtying dishes with it being their environment. It is a very difficult situation that is unavoidable. I can keep cold things in their fridge, but I do not pay to live there and I feel very uncomfortable using that space. Sorry, no other options. We are able to grill outside and have been doing that regularly.


I am using the MyFitnessPal calorie counter and every day it is telling me that "If I ate like this every day I would weigh 10lbs less in 5 weeks".

Thanks in advance for any advice!!

Replies

  • FitFabFlirty92
    FitFabFlirty92 Posts: 384 Member
    Based on your BMR, I'd say you need to eat more, though I know you don't like hearing that. Your BMR (Basal Metabolic Rate) is the number of calories you would burn naturally if you stayed in bed all day and didn't move. It's the calories you burn just staying alive -- breathing, keeping your heart beating, all that good stuff. :) But of course, you don't just lay in bed all day. So you actually burn even more calories than that. That is what your TDEE is, I believe. Eating a little lower than your TDEE and higher than your BMR is the best way to lose weight for most people. For you, that will probably be 1600-1700 calories a day.

    I'm not going to lie to you, you will gain at first. Your body has been on a roller coaster with the drastic changes in eating habits you've had over the years. Your metabolism needs to recover from that. There will likely be an uptick the first week or two, but once your body adjusts and realizes it's not starving anymore, it'll start burning fat instead of storing it, and you should lose more steadily.

    I know it's hard and it goes against your instinct to eat more to lose weight, but look at it this way -- you're already stuck now, right? You've tried everything you could, and you're willing to put in the work, but the results haven't been what you hoped they would be. So you've got nothing to lose by trying something new --except of course, the weight itself. :) Good luck!
  • Shannota
    Shannota Posts: 308 Member
    My guess is that you lost a lot of muscle mass when you were eating such a low calorie diet and that drastically reduced your metabolism. I think that if it was me, I would eat at least at 1200 calories per day to make sure that you are getting enough vitamins and minerals and probably higher than that, depending on where it is that you start gaining. I would get it to the point of gaining a little weight and then really focus on building muscle. This means lifting heavy. I have heard that The New Rules of Weight Lifting for Women is a good resource, but have not read it yet.

    Since you have had a history of anorexia, you should probably speak to your dr and perhaps a nutritionist to get this all figured out...the rest of us are going to be guessing. I hope you get it all figured out for a long and healthy life.
  • scorn1016
    scorn1016 Posts: 21 Member
    If you dont mind, what type of birth control were you taking? I too and struggling with the SAME issues. I have been stuck losing and gaining the same 4 lbs for going on 9 weeks. I visited the doctor last week and she did blood work and I met with a nutritionist. I am currently on the depo shot and she stated she wanted me off of it asap. I am thinking of switching to IUD as she said she also doesnt want me on anything oral. My first goal weight is 170 but id like to get to 160 eventually. It is very frustrating, I too am lost on what the next move should be. Maybe try a certain program. I am thinking about trying p90x, im sure it can kick any plateau! Good luck!
  • jvrichardson
    jvrichardson Posts: 7 Member
    I should probably mention that only recently have I lessened my weight training and started focusing on cardio. Up until 3 weeks ago I was doing a 1/2 hour of cardio 4-5 days a week at around 115 lbs of weight for legs and 50 lbs for arms.


    My calisthenics includes an 18 lbs weight bar for combination lifting and squats as well as a 20 lbs kettleball for "squats" with that.
  • rileysowner
    rileysowner Posts: 8,329 Member
    First of all, has your doctor eliminated things like PCOS, thyroid, insulin resistance, or other metabolic problems? If not you may be well served to make sure your are not suffering from any of those.

    Second, I am curious what sort of weight lifting you do? That will likely be the place to start to in the long run get you losing fat.

    Third, measure yourself (chest, waist, hips at the very least) to give you more of an indication of your progress. Scales only give one part of the picture. Measurements give more of it. Many people can lose inches for weeks and not lose weight, then the weight eventually starts to come off. Losing inches, however, indicates those people are losing fat.
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    BMR - Basal Metabolic Rate = the amount of calories your body needs for basic function, like if you were in a coma.

    I think patience is going to have to be your first lesson. Each change in diet or workouts needs 2-4 weeks to fully take affect. We all think/hope our bodies will react immediately but that's just not how it works.

    Try weighing yourself once per week and pick a particular time and situation - like when you first get up every Friday morning. Obviously all the fluctuations are driving you a little batty so some consistency would help. You'll still get some fluctuation dependnig on time of the month and sodium intake and workouts but for the most part it shouldn't be more than a few pounds. Daily weigh ins are fine too but only if you're ok with those 1-3 pound differences. Also, start taking body measurements. Sometimes the scale's not moving but you're still losing inches.

    When you start working out and/or change your routine, your muscles will retain water, which may be why eventhough you've been getting good workouts in, you're not losing. Again, this takes patience and time to kick in. Your body needs time to repair and adjust to the new routine.

    Same thing with upping your calories. You freak out when you start gaining but that gain could be from a variety of reasons, not just your diet. Make small gradual changes like 50-100 calories a day per week. And again, give it 2-4 weeks once you reach your higher target calorie goal to really see how it's working.

    I know you said cooking is limited but I wanted to pass on this idea anyway... Could you pick a 2 hour period on the weekends and cook up a few dishes for the two of you for the week and then store the leftover in the freezer or fridge? As long as you clean up all your messes afterwards, I can't imagine why his parents would be bothered by this.

    And lastly, make sure you're drinking plenty of water! :) Good luck!
  • Pedal_Pusher
    Pedal_Pusher Posts: 1,166 Member
    That was way too long to read but keep on keepin' on..............
  • jvrichardson
    jvrichardson Posts: 7 Member
    If you dont mind, what type of birth control were you taking?


    I was on Ortho-Tricyclen 2.5mg (the highest dose). I suffered TONS of consequences in that year.. stretch marks due to excess estrogen (my dermatologist and physician BOTH verified they were NOT from the weight gain), lots of hair loss, very, very high tri-glycerides and cholesterol, general inability to lose any weight at all no matter what did, and there's more (including the extreme weight gain). I did not have a physician at the time and was going to Planned Parenthood. They weighed me every three months and didn't notice/didn't care about the side effects. They just told me to "watch my diet" and that "birth control NEVER makes you gain weight". Enter starvation, guilt and depression thinking it was all my fault for being an Irish woman. Damn genes, I thought.



    I took a year off to help my body get back to normal, now I am on the lowest dose possible of Lutera (.1mg) but it hasn't even been a month so I can't tell if it is effecting my weight loss.




    I guess I should clarify.. I went from 230 lbs to 158 lbs in 10 weeks after birth control last year. I gained back 18 lbs once the holidays hit that I have been unable to get rid of...
  • jvrichardson
    jvrichardson Posts: 7 Member
    First of all, has your doctor eliminated things like PCOS, thyroid, insulin resistance, or other metabolic problems? If not you may be well served to make sure your are not suffering from any of those.

    Second, I am curious what sort of weight lifting you do? That will likely be the place to start to in the long run get you losing fat.

    Third, measure yourself (chest, waist, hips at the very least) to give you more of an indication of your progress. Scales only give one part of the picture. Measurements give more of it. Many people can lose inches for weeks and not lose weight, then the weight eventually starts to come off. Losing inches, however, indicates those people are losing fat.


    Yes, I forgot to mention. All my bloodwork as of 3 weeks ago is perfect. Perfect tri-glycerides, perfect cholesterol, all hormones check out totally fine. Thyroid was the first thing I had them check, but no problems there. My anemia is also gone and I have regained a normal level of iron.

    When I weight train I switch every other workout between arms and legs. I use the machines at Anytime Fitness, but also do some hand weights, kettlebells and weight balls for side twists.

    I have just started measuring myself and entering the data that MFP asks for.. neck, waist and hips. I am going to keep track of arms and thighs separately myself though since MFP doesn't have a spot for it (sad).

    Thanks!
  • jvrichardson
    jvrichardson Posts: 7 Member
    BMR - Basal Metabolic Rate = the amount of calories your body needs for basic function, like if you were in a coma.

    I think patience is going to have to be your first lesson. Each change in diet or workouts needs 2-4 weeks to fully take affect. We all think/hope our bodies will react immediately but that's just not how it works.

    Try weighing yourself once per week and pick a particular time and situation - like when you first get up every Friday morning. Obviously all the fluctuations are driving you a little batty so some consistency would help. You'll still get some fluctuation dependnig on time of the month and sodium intake and workouts but for the most part it shouldn't be more than a few pounds. Daily weigh ins are fine too but only if you're ok with those 1-3 pound differences. Also, start taking body measurements. Sometimes the scale's not moving but you're still losing inches.

    When you start working out and/or change your routine, your muscles will retain water, which may be why eventhough you've been getting good workouts in, you're not losing. Again, this takes patience and time to kick in. Your body needs time to repair and adjust to the new routine.

    Same thing with upping your calories. You freak out when you start gaining but that gain could be from a variety of reasons, not just your diet. Make small gradual changes like 50-100 calories a day per week. And again, give it 2-4 weeks once you reach your higher target calorie goal to really see how it's working.

    I know you said cooking is limited but I wanted to pass on this idea anyway... Could you pick a 2 hour period on the weekends and cook up a few dishes for the two of you for the week and then store the leftover in the freezer or fridge? As long as you clean up all your messes afterwards, I can't imagine why his parents would be bothered by this.

    And lastly, make sure you're drinking plenty of water! :) Good luck!




    I think you're right.. it's the only thing I haven't really tried so far.. patience and adding calories. Patience... ICK lol.

    I did not know that muscles will retain water from exercise changes. It really, really helps to know that. I wondered why I was peeing so much less.. I thought I was retaining water for some other reason. I drink at least 96 oz of water each day to help eliminate bloating, and, of course, keep things healthy. Someone told me I could be washing away nutrients and such.. but I kinda ignored that and kept drinking water anyway.


    Thank you!
  • jvrichardson
    jvrichardson Posts: 7 Member
    That was way too long to read but keep on keepin' on..............

    lol I didn't realize how long it was until after I posted :) you are correct.. if I was someone else I would say TLDR.
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    96 oz is about right for someone your size...meaning I've heard a good guideline is to take half of your body weight in pounds and drink that many ounces per day. So if you're 183, that's 91.5 ounces or about 11.5 cups per day. The only real way to know ifs your pee color but even that can be altered by certain foods, meds and vitamins. If it's totally clear though, you're drinking too fast or too much.

    Good luck to you!
  • jvrichardson
    jvrichardson Posts: 7 Member
    Based on your BMR, I'd say you need to eat more, though I know you don't like hearing that. Your BMR (Basal Metabolic Rate) is the number of calories you would burn naturally if you stayed in bed all day and didn't move. It's the calories you burn just staying alive -- breathing, keeping your heart beating, all that good stuff. :) But of course, you don't just lay in bed all day. So you actually burn even more calories than that. That is what your TDEE is, I believe. Eating a little lower than your TDEE and higher than your BMR is the best way to lose weight for most people. For you, that will probably be 1600-1700 calories a day.

    I'm not going to lie to you, you will gain at first. Your body has been on a roller coaster with the drastic changes in eating habits you've had over the years. Your metabolism needs to recover from that. There will likely be an uptick the first week or two, but once your body adjusts and realizes it's not starving anymore, it'll start burning fat instead of storing it, and you should lose more steadily.

    I know it's hard and it goes against your instinct to eat more to lose weight, but look at it this way -- you're already stuck now, right? You've tried everything you could, and you're willing to put in the work, but the results haven't been what you hoped they would be. So you've got nothing to lose by trying something new --except of course, the weight itself. :) Good luck!


    Thank you for explaining this! You're right.. I'm stuck now.. so I have been looking to try ANYTHING that might help. I guess eating more is somehow the solution.. and I bet you're right... because that is what everyone says.
  • rileysowner
    rileysowner Posts: 8,329 Member
    First of all, has your doctor eliminated things like PCOS, thyroid, insulin resistance, or other metabolic problems? If not you may be well served to make sure your are not suffering from any of those.

    Second, I am curious what sort of weight lifting you do? That will likely be the place to start to in the long run get you losing fat.

    Third, measure yourself (chest, waist, hips at the very least) to give you more of an indication of your progress. Scales only give one part of the picture. Measurements give more of it. Many people can lose inches for weeks and not lose weight, then the weight eventually starts to come off. Losing inches, however, indicates those people are losing fat.


    Yes, I forgot to mention. All my bloodwork as of 3 weeks ago is perfect. Perfect tri-glycerides, perfect cholesterol, all hormones check out totally fine. Thyroid was the first thing I had them check, but no problems there. My anemia is also gone and I have regained a normal level of iron.

    When I weight train I switch every other workout between arms and legs. I use the machines at Anytime Fitness, but also do some hand weights, kettlebells and weight balls for side twists.

    I have just started measuring myself and entering the data that MFP asks for.. neck, waist and hips. I am going to keep track of arms and thighs separately myself though since MFP doesn't have a spot for it (sad).

    Thanks!

    So it sounds like you are not following any specific program. Unless you are very well versed in weight lifting, following a program of some sort is highly recommended. Frankly for a beginner, doing your whole body 3 times per week (Monday, Wednesday, Friday) is just fine. The pattern you are using now is not really ideal as there is no way to measure progress to see if you are getting stronger. How heavy do you lift?
  • stronglikebull
    stronglikebull Posts: 402
    so based on everything you avoid, what DO you eat? i understand that you are in an uncomfortable and frustrating situation, but you need to eat. you will have to get over not wanting to cook. your body is already messed up from the birth control and restrictive eating you've done and you need to stabilize it with real food. you should also probably cut down on your exercise. good luck.
  • UG77
    UG77 Posts: 206 Member
    I should probably mention that only recently have I lessened my weight training and started focusing on cardio. Up until 3 weeks ago I was doing a 1/2 hour of cardio 4-5 days a week at around 115 lbs of weight for legs and 50 lbs for arms.


    My calisthenics includes an 18 lbs weight bar for combination lifting and squats as well as a 20 lbs kettleball for "squats" with that.

    You're going in the opposite direction. Less cardio, more strength training.

    If you want an explanation on this I can provide one but it's going to be a wall of text.
  • mearlie
    mearlie Posts: 224
    Totally agree with the strength training and that you need to eat more. Eat healthy, but more. Make sure you're getting enough protein and stay off the scales for awhile to let your metabolism stabilize.
  • WhoIsAmber
    WhoIsAmber Posts: 161 Member
    Restricting your calories so low for years has probably stripped you of a lot of your Lean Body Mass (muscle). When your body is low on calories, for the first few days, your body will eat your fat. BUT, after about 3 days, it starts feeding off your muscles too.

    Muscle burns fat, if there is very little there, you're going to burn fat off your muscles A LOT slower because there's nothing there to burn it. Like throwing paper on a single ember, you're not going to get a bonfire out of that.

    You said you're upping your cardio and doing less weight training, you need to reverse that and do more weight training and less cardio in the beginning. You need to get your muscles back otherwise you can huff and puff on a elliptical for as long as you want and probably not lose as much as someone else who has more muscle mass.

    When you start weight training, look up a weight training program that does a full body workout. Throw in 15-30 minutes of cardio after your weight training sets.

    EAT MORE, your body needs fuel. Eating more does not equal weighing more if you're eating healthy, clean, minimal-to-no processed foods. I know you've lost weight with not eating before, but you've completely screwed up your body and metabolism in the process. You can fast for a few days at a time, but don't go over 3 days without eating your daily calories.

    Your weight will likely fluctuate a lot in the beginning because your body is not used to it and is trying to process what the heck is going on because you've already put it through so many changes in diet and exercise in the past. But keep with it and you're definitely going to see results if you stick with a healthy lifestyle.
  • rileysowner
    rileysowner Posts: 8,329 Member
    I agree, you need to lift more and do cardio less. Cardio is over rated for aiding weight loss. Look at this http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2011/07/21/meet-staci-your-new-powerlifting-super-hero/

    Better yet, lift free weights http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/744311-free-weights-vs-machines-holy-crap

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