can i just vent for a moment?

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So, i have kind of lost some motivation. 70+ days in and i have lost the urge to want to excersize on my own. Dont know what its going to take to get my motivation back, but i guess i will have to discover that on my own.

I have been doing my best now to stay within my calorie goal, while my motivation takes a nap. But i noticed my weight went up a pound or so ( it changes all the time but has been hovering between 1-2 pounds the last 10 days ) Now ive gone back through my journal and If i did go over it was only a couple of days and besides 1 time i did not eat my entire 1000 cal deficit. Which of course has me wondering about my calorie limits.

I went to my Dr about weight loss and she looked at me like i was speaking a foreign language. handed me a paper about some place called simply for life. So i called them, they emailed me prices and its 2000 dollars just to see a dietitian there. No one here seems to have any knowledge of any free dietitians i can see, because really i just want some answers on if 1500 calories is too high on my days off where i am pretty sedentary. Dropping to the sedentary level on MFP for my days off would mean just eating two meals a day. I wish this all made logical sense to me, i don't know how anyone can live on less calories then i have... maybe thinner people are just used to eating less, but im still 250 pounds, it was only less then 3 months ago i was borderlining 300, i may have changed what i eat, but the one factor that hasnt changed is i still want to eat a decent sized plate of food, even if 75% of it is veggies. I don't know what others are eating also, but it seems like everything i enjoy eating racks in a lot of salt.

I am not made of money, all these places geared to help people with knowledge and weight loss are just too expensive for a single person to afford. Especially when really all i want is for someone to give me a calorie guideline based on my lifestyle. i dont know, maybe i fail at this, maybe i just dont have the imagination it takes to make different meals. But we are all different, everyone likes different foods, i just wish mine didnt seem like its the wrong ones. I wish i had help, i wish i had answers and i wish i could have my motivation back.
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Replies

  • elvensnow
    elvensnow Posts: 154 Member
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    You're eating 1500 calories at 250 lbs? That is WAY too low. I have no idea where you got that number but I doubt it was anything legitimate.

    I started at 240 (now 170) and I started with Weight Watchers, so unfortunately I don't know my exact calorie consumption but I can guarantee it was AT LEAST 1800-1900 calories a day. And that wasn't even counting exercise/eating back points.

    I would recommend doing some research into BMR (basal metabolic rate) and TDEE (total daily energy expenditure). These are some target calorie numbers that it helps to get familiar with for your body. There are tons of free calculators and sites on the web, and even a group here on MFP that focuses on TDEE (Eat more to weigh less is the name of the group).

    As far as your motivation, yeah it happens. I've been plateauing between 160-170 for about a year now and it's frustrating as hell to be unable to lose more (my goal is around 140-145). But I do appreciate the benefits of just how much healthier and happier I am now so I try not to focus on the negative.

    I do find that a good motivation for me to exercise is to have real concrete goals. Not "lose 5 lbs this week" kind of goals, but set exercise goals, like "I want to run a 5k in 3 months" or "I want to run 10 total miles this week" and then increase from there. Usually it helps to have longer goals broken down into weekly ones.

    Anyway, good luck with everything.
  • Krisstah
    Krisstah Posts: 136 Member
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    i will check out the group, ive looked into BMR and TDEE but besides every site either not making sense to me, or giving me different numbers, i also live two very different life styles, 15 days a month i am sedentry and the other i am very active =/ lol.. but maybe they will help, thank you
  • tiffanyctyree
    tiffanyctyree Posts: 14 Member
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    Can you explain why the two vastly different lifestyles each month?
  • NCchar130
    NCchar130 Posts: 955 Member
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    I'm at 199 right now and my allotted calories is at 1700 not including exercise calories. I agree with the other poster, reevaluate how many you can eat in a day for sure!
  • AthenaArcher
    AthenaArcher Posts: 41 Member
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    First off great job on the weight loss! :) 50 pounds in three months is awesome! 50 pounds in a year is a challenge. Second check out YouTube for some great workouts that don't cost anything I like Tiffany loves zumba and some of the befit videos especially the 5 minute ones because I have days that I just don't have an hour to workout.I can also do 1 minute of exercise when I am watching t.v. every time there is a commercial I do an exercise like sit ups or jump rope or squats etc. until the program is back on which takes about 1 minute, if you are watching a 2 hour movie on t.v. that is about 30 minutes of exercise you just squeezed into your day without going to the gym.I also agree that 1500 calories is low for you. I weight about 160 and I eat 1600-to 2000 calories a day.There is a really good book with more info on this that you can get from most libraries called the eat clean diet by Tosca Reno that you should take a look at for more info on this subject. Good luck!:happy:
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    Here is your help & your answers:

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12

    Read that. Read it several times until it makes sense. Calculate your BMR (# of calories needed for your body to function). Calculate your average TDEE (# of calories you burn living life, including exercise). Subtract 20% from TDEE for your goal. At 250lbs, you could probably even subtract 25-30% if you wanted.

    1500 is not enough. I'm 187lbs right now and I eat 1900-2100 calories a day. I'm moderately active (exercise 3-5 times a week). A low calorie goal will work for awhile, but it stops working at a certain point. You need to fuel your body.

    You said you are very active 15 days a month - ok, so that means you exercise every other day. That's pretty good! That means you are a "moderately active" person.

    Do some research, read about BMR & TDEE until it makes sense. Message me if you have any questions. You've achieved a lot so far, but you need to stop making excuses and start taking control of your weight loss from here on out. No one can give you motivation and no one can do the work for you. You have to want it & you have to do it.
  • besaro
    besaro Posts: 1,858 Member
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    Thank you for the post Lora. I think I am way under too, I am 240 and eating 1360 calories. Everything I have read makes me think that is too low. But because I have lost weight (10 pounds) over the past 3 weeks, I am now wary of upping my calories.

    I also see the posts that eating more calories doesn;t work so....
  • panda007dammit
    panda007dammit Posts: 36 Member
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    Honestly, your motivation WILL run out. If you only look at the big picture and that huge end goal while not looking at anything in between, you're going to mentally burn out before you reach that point. You need some smaller goals to keep you going, and more than anything, you need a routine. A routine keeps you going when motivation is low. If you don't schedule your exercise and to some extent plan your meals, you will have many more days where the motivation is just not there to keep you going. A schedule is much more likely to keep you on track.

    As for calories, you're eating way too few. I'm 148 pounds and my daily calorie goal is barely under 1300 calories if I just sit on my butt all day, which puts me on track to lose roughly a pound a week. I eat back the majority of my exercise calories, so there are many days I'm eating over 2000 calories. I'm still losing weight. Not only is cutting your calories too sharply a bad idea in terms of health, it's the very thing that's going to make you lose motivation. You're going to slip up because you're HUNGRY, as you well should be. You need to find a weight loss speed that you can live with. It may be slower than you like, but if you're not driven to eat a roll of cookie dough and a huge pile of spaghetti just to satisfy the insane hunger gnawing at your belly, then it's the right speed for you.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    Thank you for the post Lora. I think I am way under too, I am 240 and eating 1360 calories. Everything I have read makes me think that is too low. But because I have lost weight (10 pounds) over the past 3 weeks, I am now wary of upping my calories.

    I also see the posts that eating more calories doesn;t work so....

    Well, it's about having the math right so the calorie goal is correct. If someone is at 1200 then ups to 1500 and claims that it doesn't work, I wouldn't really believe it. Maybe their actual goal should have been 1900 - they were still falling short of their target. You have to do the math. There's no other way.

    You will lose on low calorie. When you have a lot to lose, a drastic cut seems like the best path and it pays off big time in the beginning.
    I started at 230lbs and was eating 1200. I lost weight. But I was hungry, so I upped to 1400. My hair fell out and I was tired all the time. I found out my BMR was about 1750 at the time, so I started eating that. It helped a little, but I was still hitting a wall in my workouts and my hair wasn't growing back in (but it did stop falling out). I finally came across the Road Map (the link I posted) and did my TDEE (currenlty 2500) and a 20% cut from that puts me at about 2000 a day. Way different. I have energy, my hair is back to normal, I'm losing weight - it's great. There are always fluctuations and times when I don't lose....that's normal for everyone. But I'm on track and it works.

    Once again, you have to do the math. It's the only way to really figure it out.
  • yowza101
    yowza101 Posts: 196 Member
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    If you have health insurance, contact them and see if they have free programs that can help you. With my health insurance, we have weight managers that can help with nutrition, weight loss, stress, etc...it's an 8 week program, but it's a great start to a lifestyle change...and it's free.
  • Tracepa98
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    When I signed up here I calculated my BMI etc and logging these numbers I was presented with a caloric limit of 1990 per day. I started out at 275 and a month later Im currently at 258. And even now I still have a range of 400-500 calories at the end of the day that I havent eaten. I tend to have 3 meals and 3 snacks.



    It definitely sounds like its too low for you.
  • ladyNpurple1
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    Wow, to all of you who have replied, and for "can I just vent for a moment". I too am having difficulty looseing, as I have gone for almost two years without a weight loss. Of couse I have been on a couple of trips, however, get right back on track after I return, along with attempting to stay honest while I am gone, i.e. exercise, and thinking about what and how much I eat while on vacations.
    All you have helped me so much, as I am 66, and exercise 5 -6 times a week, for 48 to 60 minutes each day. I have stayed at 1300 calories, along with not eating my exercise calories. WOW, from what I read, I do not think I am eating enough.'
    Just wanted to thank you all for your advise, and encourage everyone for the journey we are on. I will check my TDEE, was not aware of what this is, but will research it.
    Thanks again to all. Hang in there, as I too am afraid to add calories, but if my 1300 is not working, I will give a calorie increase a try.
    Will check in later, thanks again.:smile:
  • Krisstah
    Krisstah Posts: 136 Member
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    Thanks for all the replies. i have read the road map several times and sadly i am just not having it make sense to me, its just too much information all at once and i get frustrated trying to remember what was just recently wrote, i go back and read it and read it again..

    The reason why my days are so different is because i work 12 hour shifts, fitbit says im putting in 16K+ steps and burned over 3000 calories a day at my job. On my days off, i tend to be very relaxed, laptop bound, and unless i have a friend make plans, i do not really go out.

    1500 might be too low on days i work, but what if 1500 is too high on my days off.. i dont know how to feel confident in these numbers.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    Thanks for all the replies. i have read the road map several times and sadly i am just not having it make sense to me, its just too much information all at once and i get frustrated trying to remember what was just recently wrote, i go back and read it and read it again..

    The reason why my days are so different is because i work 12 hour shifts, fitbit says im putting in 16K+ steps and burned over 3000 calories a day at my job. On my days off, i tend to be very relaxed, laptop bound, and unless i have a friend make plans, i do not really go out.

    1500 might be too low on days i work, but what if 1500 is too high on my days off.. i dont know how to feel confident in these numbers.

    Well, no one can read it for you. Once again, it's up to you to figure it out. Not trying to be harsh, but you have to decide if that's the route you want to take or if you want to figure out another method.

    If you have a fitbit, why not just wear it every day and take a 20% cut from it every day? If you burn 3000 calories during a work day, then eat 2400 those days. If you only burn 1900 on your days off, then eat 1520? Or track your calories burnt every day for one week, figure out the average over 7 days, take a 20% cut from that?
    So, if you worked for 4 days and burned 3000 each day, and had 3 days off and burned 1900 each day, your average would be:
    (3000x4)+(1900x3)=17700 calories burned per week
    17700 / 7 = 2528 calories per day
    2528 x 20% = 505
    2528 - 505 = 2023

    So, you would eat 2023 per day. This would give you a total of 14161 calories for the week, with a deficit of 3539...which would be about a pound a week. You could cut 25% if you wanted.

    Of course, those were just estimates. You would need to track for a week, record every day's burn and figure out your acutal numbers, but that just gives you an idea of how to do it.
  • Krisstah
    Krisstah Posts: 136 Member
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    i dont really expect anyone to read it, i am just more of a hands on and visual learner.

    anyway i am open to doing it via fitbit. i guess i am just scared those numbers arent going to be accurate. and that is what is demotivating me, i feel like im blindly going into something. sorry i really am just venting and dont expect people to have the perfect resolution to my issues

    im going to have to trust in something, and i guess im gonna have to figure out what that is..
  • MariaChele85
    MariaChele85 Posts: 267 Member
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    Yes, Please try the TDEE-20%.....I started this because I was confused on how many calories I should be eating. This is working for me. I did initially gain about 10lbs from water weight. But about 3-4 weeks into it, my body has started to "let go" of the fat. I am now eating 1900-2100 calories and losing .50-1lb...but I am convinced it is pure fat.
  • Rmoots
    Rmoots Posts: 14 Member
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    Check with your local city recreation center. I was able to meet with a dietician as part of a program I joined at they rec center (gym) I work out at.

    Also, I think our motivation always has it's "seasons' during the year.....just know that if you stay consistant it will come back.
  • pawheeler1
    pawheeler1 Posts: 80 Member
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    bump
  • namluv
    namluv Posts: 194 Member
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    lots of people on Fiver are offering plans - been thinking about checking one of them out myself (obviously with some credential verification)
  • ndblades
    ndblades Posts: 233 Member
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    Chin up! You have lost weight - and better it to come off slowly and stay off! There are plenty of days I am not motivated - a couple things that helps me:

    * I put on my workout clothes, tennis shoes and ipod and just listen to the music -- it usually gets me moving.
    * Try a new exercise
    * Challenge a friend (either inperson or via mfp) -- I did this with an MFP friend, and it really helped me on those days I was tired!

    As for your "hungrieness" -- your food choices look good and balanced, great job! But I might suggest adding two 100-150 calorie snacks (you can decrease your other calories if you wish), and making sure your morning is full of protien. If I dont' make myself eggs for breakfast, I have peanut butter on an english muffin - there are endless choices- I dont' worry about the fat that is natural. I always have almonds for my morning snack... it really makes a difference later in the day.

    Finally - when in a slump, I turn to the forums and my friends at MFP - -we all have been there, if not there right now!