Argumentative people

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Just came across my first meany on MFP. I don't see why some people feel the need to respond in an ugly way, when I thought we were here to support and encourage one another. Even if said person had a valid point, why did they have to be so mean about it?? I am a sensitive person and try to be sensitive to others. I don't like being attacked while I am *trying to be helpful and encouraging to others. Oh well.... I guess that is just the way of the worl, especially on the Internet, where people can hide beijing the screen and say whatever they please, regardless of how it makes people feel. Just wish someone hadn't been rude to me on here. I had been enjoying the community until now.....

Replies

  • amylovescupcakes
    amylovescupcakes Posts: 146 Member
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    I did a rant in my own blog about annoying stuff on mfp, and I completely agree. Also it's pure douchebaggery.
  • morticiamom
    morticiamom Posts: 221 Member
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    I wonder if it's the same one I ran into. I reported it, but haven't heard if anything was said to the person. But yeah, some people just don't get the whole 'if you can't say something nice' thing.
  • josiereside
    josiereside Posts: 720 Member
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    Believe me, there is more than 1.... I try and avoid actually starting a post. People really take advantage of the anonymity of the cyber world. Best thing to do is ignore it and don't get suckered in to making a response in your defense. I think most are here to help!
  • yoyogirl68
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    Hi, I put this on your wall as well:

    Don't worry about it, she is probably just defending the diet, not having a go at you. I read your post and know what you meant - I read it as no "starchy" carbs. Don't let that one person get you down. You are here for a reason, to track your weight and get to your goal. If people don't fit into your support group, just ignore them and keep moving forward. Now - forget all that, focus on the postive and have a good day!

    Don't let one negative ruin all the positives that you have been finding here. There are plenty of kind and supportive people here to help you and provide support. Just smile and say "whatever".
  • JohnMessmer
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    Some people like a kick in the butt when they stray off course, and some people take constructive criticism very well, of course that means the other spectrum is that some don't.

    I have asked my friends if they would rather have a cheerleader or a counselor and none of them replied cheerleader. I do not ever try to be mean to anyone, in real life or online, but if someone is not hitting their goals then I am going to question it, and perhaps some may find it out of line and may even defriend me.

    I am here for the long term, I don't want "Good Job" and "Way to Go" if I don't deserve it, and I certainly won't give it to anyone that I do not feel deserves it.
  • QueenofScott
    QueenofScott Posts: 305 Member
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    Thanks y'all:) I really appreciate the kind words and support!
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,119 Member
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    This is not the way to dispute a past grievance. Your only legit means of complaining is to "report post." But if you were talking about that post made in the South Beach thread.....um.....:huh:

    This type of thread just creates more drama. Let it go.
  • penniemh
    penniemh Posts: 124 Member
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    I am actually considering leaving this site because I broke my own rule and posted a random "stream of consciousness" post and had someone, who doesn't know me at all, make snide, rude comments about it. It's the reason I stay off line w/my thoughts...problem is I have no IRL support for weight loss, so I came here for it. Torques me off that people are *like that.*
  • baycat107
    baycat107 Posts: 165 Member
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    Sorry that happened to you. But, yeah, there are some real jerks out here. I ran into one, and geez, he knew he was so right about everything. Said I was so ignorant. But you know from his profile pic, he looked like a bully. And on his profile page he dispenses all this info about how he does his workout in great detail. Who cares? I just stay away, and mostly don't even comment much anymore. Again, I know it hurt, but try to let it go. There are all kind of cyber-bullies out here.
  • QueenofScott
    QueenofScott Posts: 305 Member
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    John, I certainly understand, but this had nothing to do with me straying off course. This person was correcting a statement I made about the eating plan I am following. Pointing out an in accuracy does not have to be done in an ugly way....at least not in my world.

    And as far as friends go, I don't need or want someone to cheer me on when I don't deserve it, but I wouldn't want them to beat me up if I were having a bad day or week (which I have not). I did, however join to have support and encouragement from people who are fighting the weight battle like I am, not to have someone be rude to me.
  • cmeade20
    cmeade20 Posts: 1,238 Member
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    Well, some people (like myself) suck at being sensitive. They just think they are being blunt or to the point and don't see how it could be taken as offensive. They aren't trying to be mean they just failed to see what they did.

    That being said there are some serious tools on this site. Don't take it to heart because they are not worth a second thought.
  • g4genn
    g4genn Posts: 58 Member
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    I did a rant in my own blog about annoying stuff on mfp, and I completely agree. Also it's pure douchebaggery.

    OMG That made me laugh. I love the new word. It think I will use it from now on. Douchebaggery. It's priceless.
  • JohnMessmer
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    John, I certainly understand, but this had nothing to do with me straying off course. This person was correcting a statement I made about the eating plan I am following. Pointing out an in accuracy does not have to be done in an ugly way....at least not in my world.

    And as far as friends go, I don't need or want someone to cheer me on when I don't deserve it, but I wouldn't want them to beat me up if I were having a bad day or week (which I have not). I did, however join to have support and encouragement from people who are fighting the weight battle like I am, not to have someone be rude to me.

    I understand, some people have to be right even when they are wrong and some really seem to enjoy being a condescending jackwad (or jillwad as the case may be). For those people I just ignore and move on, just like IRL there are all kinds of people and they all have their own opinions and predispositions to all kinds of topics.
  • Spartan_Maker
    Spartan_Maker Posts: 683 Member
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    There are a lot of fragile egos in the world and they can be found in abundance in fitness forums. Many people jealousy guard their fat loss and fitness theories like they do their worldviews.
  • amsohs85
    amsohs85 Posts: 166
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    I have a number of friends who refuse to comment on the forums because of this very thing. Remember MFP is just a mini version of society in general. You're going to find all kinds of people on here. Yes theres better ways for people to express that they disagree with an opinion and it starts with tact and maturity. Some people on here just dont have either one. :flowerforyou:
  • verptwerp
    verptwerp Posts: 3,659 Member
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    I appreciate that people need encouragement ..... but sometimes after reading posts filled with "I can't do this" and "I won't do that" ....... well, yeah, I want to be snarky ........ but then I bite my tongue & walk away from the computer ...... because most likely it's ME who woke up cranky that day ....... I call my husband Mr. GrumpyPants, but he's not the only one in this house LOL

    There is one cool thing I've learned on these boards ....... the term "SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE" ..... I have a lot of fun with that at work now :laugh:

    BTW, I honestly appreciate the friends here who actually "talk" to me & tell me I eat too much sodium or whatever ..... another set of eyes never hurts !

    Hope you're feeling less hurt now :flowerforyou:
  • runnermama81
    runnermama81 Posts: 388 Member
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    My dad used to say, "some people aren't happy unless they're mad." He is a very wise man. There will always be people like that whether online or in person. Just try not to let it get to ya:)