I can't stop eating :(

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SazzleDylan
SazzleDylan Posts: 3
in Health and Weight Loss
If anybody can offer me some advice then I would be very appreciative.

I am bulimic. I eat vast amounts of food and then cope with that by either purging (although not so much these days) or fasting/restricting. When there is absolutely no food at all in my system then I'm fine, but as soon as I eat it's like somebody has flicked a switch in my brain... and I just can't stop. My only saving grace is that I am now a vegan, so at least what I binge on is vegetable sugars and fats.

I have tried the whole 'moderation' thing, but I just can't do it. I don't know how. I don't know when I'm full, and by the time I do it's too late and I feel like I've blown it and might as well gorge myself. I can eat until the point where I am throwing up in my mouth if i move suddenly, or where the food is just waiting in my throat because there is physically no room in my stomach... and I will keep eating. I can't stop it. I have 0 willpower. And it upsets me so much.

Every time I tell myself that I'm going to go about my weight loss healthily I end up ruining it. The only way I ever seem to have any success is if I just stop eating all together. But I don't want that! I want to be able to eat normal amounts of healthy, nutritious food 3X a day and not feel the need to keep eating. I also have IBS so I bloat a lot, especially after things like fruit, beans and general fiber, which obviously doesn't help my 'blown it' idea.

Please, if there is anything anybody can suggest. I am actually desperate.

Thank you.

Replies

  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
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    I suggest professional help.
  • lady_jessi
    lady_jessi Posts: 77 Member
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    I can understand what you're saying. Not to that extreme, but I'm a very compulsive eater also, You'll frequently find me shoveling my kids' leftovers down my gullet. Anyway, what you really need is therapy finding the underlying cause of your disorder so you can deal with THAT. Trying to only curb the eating isn't going to get you very far.
  • MtnKat
    MtnKat Posts: 714
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    You should see a therapist. Your campus at your school may have one that you can see for free (I saw that you are a college student). There may be other programs you can look into.

    There is nothing wrong with needing a little help. I think a professional would be much better than a bunch of strangers on the internet.

    Good luck!
  • butterflyfairy2
    butterflyfairy2 Posts: 96 Member
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    You should see a therapist. Your campus at your school may have one that you can see for free (I saw that you are a college student). There may be other programs you can look into.

    There is nothing wrong with needing a little help. I think a professional would be much better than a bunch of strangers on the internet.

    Good luck!
  • IveLanded
    IveLanded Posts: 797 Member
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    I suggest professional help.

    this.
  • purple_tux1
    purple_tux1 Posts: 250 Member
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    You've done the right thing by reaching out for help. There are alot of other people out there with this problem. I would suggest finding professional help and a support group.
  • nomoreFA
    nomoreFA Posts: 40
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    I was bulimic in High school and college. Please, Please get some professional help. I didn't seek help and now 20 years later, my metabolism is shot and I gain weight very easily. I still don't eat in a healthy manner. You need to seek a professional counselor who specializes in eating disorders. If left untreated you can do major damage to your body. My hair began to fall out and I stopped menstrating for awhile. This is serious. Please don't wait 20 years like I did to get help. You are a beautiful, young woman and you have the power to overcome this disease.

    I wish you the best of luck!
  • nomoreFA
    nomoreFA Posts: 40
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    I read on your profile that you aim to eat 800 calories a day. That is way to low. Your body will think it's starving and that makes it harder for you to lose weight. I know I sound "preachy" and i don't mean it that way. I just don't wan't to see you make all the same mistakes I made. A professional can help you set a healthy calorie goal too.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 33,997 Member
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    Restricting to 800 calories then the binge/purge cycle is all about punishment or control, or anger or some other emotional disorder.

    You need a professional to sort this out, more than likely. Do it soon before you cause irreparable damage to your heart, liver, kidneys, or other organs. This process will become more extreme, and soon you won't be capable of clear thinking. Do it tomorrow.

    There are hotlines you can call, Google Eating Disorders. If you can't reach someone tonight, call your doctor tomorrow, or stop in a hospital - they have social workers that can get you a referral.
  • SazzleDylan
    SazzleDylan Posts: 3
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    Thank you all. I wasn't aware I'd received any replies to this thread until I just found it again by accident.

    I've been signed off from university for the rest of the year and I am soon to begin psychotherapy after an assessment at the mental health clinic back home. They said it's likely a coping strategy for loneliness. Trying to eat more calories now (although still exercising) and making sure i have three healthy meals every day. I lose a lot of hair and i didn't have periods for 7 months (they only came back two months ago) so it's probably just in time.

    Thank you all.
  • JesterMFP
    JesterMFP Posts: 3,596 Member
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    Thank you all. I wasn't aware I'd received any replies to this thread until I just found it again by accident.

    I've been signed off from university for the rest of the year and I am soon to begin psychotherapy after an assessment at the mental health clinic back home. They said it's likely a coping strategy for loneliness. Trying to eat more calories now (although still exercising) and making sure i have three healthy meals every day. I lose a lot of hair and i didn't have periods for 7 months (they only came back two months ago) so it's probably just in time.

    Thank you all.
    It sounds like you've made a really good decision, and the best one to take care of yourself. Good luck. :flowerforyou:

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