Need friends who won't tell me to eat more.

I need friends who won't constantly tell me to eat more.

When I used to eat 500 to 600 calories a day and work very hard to eat more and manage 900 calories, feeling good about my efforts, only to have people post to eat more, it is very discouraging and I am SO discouraged by the negativism.

I'm tired of being knocked down for the good efforts. People need to realize that low calorie eaters already know they need to eat more and are already making the efforts and do not need to be reminded so many times a week, but rather to read positive comments.

I try to make sure I comment on all my friends and I try not to have too many. I want to keep my friends numbers low so that I can take this seriously.

Now, I'm going to unfriend anyone who tells me to eat more. It's really dragging me down and I'm ready to quit the social end of MFP because of it.
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Replies

  • tuffytuffy1
    tuffytuffy1 Posts: 920 Member
    I'm sorry you are feeling discouraged. I hope you can find some great support here.
  • MyCornerOnline
    MyCornerOnline Posts: 45 Member
    bump
  • halfretird
    halfretird Posts: 49 Member
    Dont quit ...there are times i dont eat much either and others i eat too much...you can add me if you like
  • schmenge55
    schmenge55 Posts: 745 Member
    Add me if you like and tell me how to best support you (ever a time to make suggestions for example)
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    MFP itself tells you to eat more.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    Okay, but you should probably eat more.
  • sh4690
    sh4690 Posts: 169 Member
    I won't.... haha!
    I think it's ridiculous people demand people eat more. Unless you are my doctor, nurse, or dietician, telling me I will die in 7 days, then sorry but your opinion means nothing to me :)

    We all go under our calorie goals some days, (I NEVER eat back my exercise calories), that's life!

    :)
  • grubb1019
    grubb1019 Posts: 371 Member
    If you are only eating 900 calories or less every day they are telling you that out of concern.
  • Kitten2629
    Kitten2629 Posts: 1,358 Member
    I wish you the best of luck.
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    If her doctor said it is fine to only eat 500-900 cals a day then I would have no problem with it. If not, then conventional wisdom and this site tells you to eat at least 1200. She hasn't said her doctor recommended she eat that much.
  • Awkward30
    Awkward30 Posts: 1,927 Member
    Why settle for your eating habits being "not as unhealthy as they were before"

    Why not aim to do better? It's not saying that you aren't doing a great job now to say that you should keep trying to do better.
  • I can totally relate to you. For years I've lost weight through eating ridiculously low calories for months on end (and then regaining all the weight plus more each time when going back to eating more). I now realise that that isn't a healthy way to get slim, (well, I knew it wasn't healthy but I just wanted to get thin so badly and I didn't know how else to lose weight).

    Since May I've been trying to lose weight and I too initially had trouble eating 1200 calories. I just couldn't stop myself from missing meals and constantly was eating lower than the recommended calories - even though I tried adding high calorie healthy foods into my diet. I was eating around 900 calories too most days, some days around 700 but I felt great that that number was not as low as 200 or so like usual. Now 4 months into trying to change my diet and eat healthier, I am finally making it to around 1200! This week I've prepared my meals in advance and it's really helped me real my target of around 1200 calories.

    Good luck. I hope that you continue eating more. It may take a while but it can be done.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,422 Member
    This site is full of people who have eating disorders. Some eat way too much, some don't eat enough. In the end it's a Fitness site, and unless you are under 4'10" you really need to eat more....and if you want to fix your disordered thinking, we will help you. We won't help you stay sick. No one has that kind of time.
  • harlanJEN
    harlanJEN Posts: 1,089 Member
    If you are only eating 900 calories or less every day they are telling you that out of concern.

    ^^^^THIS

    personally, I don't want friends who encourage unhealthy , ultimately counter-productive habits / behavior
  • harlanJEN
    harlanJEN Posts: 1,089 Member
    This site is full of people who have eating disorders. Some eat way too much, some don't eat enough. In the end it's a Fitness site, and unless you are under 4'10" you really need to eat more....and if you want to fix your disordered thinking, we will help you. We won't help you stay sick. No one has that kind of time.

    : )
  • GrannySparkle
    GrannySparkle Posts: 225 Member
    I am sorry you are discouraged because people are telling you to eat more....but dear you should eat more. Here is the explanation I got from my dietician and surgeon.

    If you don't eat enough, your body goes into stravation mode. It takes what you do eat and stores it cause the body doesn't think it is going to get any more to eat any time soon.

    I had gastric bypass Augsut 16.2012. 4 weeks post op I stopped lossing weight!! 2 weeks and no loss. How can it be when I don't eat much. My body was storing what I did eat.

    Having said that...I only eat 700-1000 calories a day. BUT my stomach can only hold 1/4 cup of food. Talk to your doctor.
    Find out what THEY say how many calories you should eat. Then stick with that!!
  • solyhhit
    solyhhit Posts: 97 Member
    I wouldn't consider it negativity. If you see results that are good, you feel healthy, then go ahead..

    ...personally just by your caloric intake I would say eat more. Yes I said it.
  • crysiebrown
    crysiebrown Posts: 8 Member
    Don't eat more, if your full then your good. I constantly get the "your eating too few calories" message but oh well. I'm eating from 800-1100, usually around 900-1000 but I'm full so I'M NOT EATING ANYMORE! And you shouldn't either.
  • dsmpunk
    dsmpunk Posts: 262 Member
    Don't let anyone discourage you. You know what works for you and it may grind others' gears, but who cares? Everyone has an opinion. For every argument out there for one weight loss philosophy, you will find an argument against it.

    It does go against the grain, but then again 20 years ago we were told to eat low fat diets to lose weight. Hardly anyone follows that mantra anymore.
  • Erindipitous
    Erindipitous Posts: 1,234 Member
    If her doctor said it is fine to only eat 500-900 cals a day then I would have no problem with it. If not, then conventional wisdom and this site tells you to eat at least 1200. She hasn't said her doctor recommended she eat that much.

    If her doctor told her to only eat that much, she needs a new doctor.


    Edited to add: Personally, I delete people who don't eat enough.
  • I'm new here and I hope that never happens to me. My intake is low also because well...I'm going through a stressful time.
  • anrev42
    anrev42 Posts: 331
    If you get easily discouraged by others opinion, then keep your food diary private. Is as simple as that. Goodluck with your weight loss journey.
  • SongDragon
    SongDragon Posts: 205 Member
    Sometimes it's hard to eat enough, but still stay equal on everything else you're watching. Or you just don't feel like it. I'm sick right now, so I don't really feel like food. Much less do I feel like cooking. Cooking and eating for oneself alone is just difficult sometimes, and I am alone about half a month or so at a time. So, I'll make no judgments and try to encourage you if you want to add me. I have lost eight pounds on MFP so far.

    Also, every time I see the MFP message threatening me with "starvation mode" I squinch up my nose in annoyance. It threatens me with that if I'm within ten calories of the goal, even, but the number appears red (which I associate with rebuke) and subtly punishes me by telling all my friends that I "completed my food diary" without the usual adage of "and was under calorie goal" if I go even slightly over. Some days, I'm just a touch sensitive to it. Lol.
  • lmd71
    lmd71 Posts: 11
    Been there.

    But seriously - eat more. I was diagnosed with anorexia, so I know it is hard as hell, but it HAS to be done. I hated my friends for making me eat, but they wanted what was best for me. And for the record, if you jump start your calories right up, you LOSE weight. Happened when I was in treatment. I lost weight on 4,000 calories!

    Anyway, eat more and you'll enjoy life and yourself a LOT more.
  • jetscreaminagain
    jetscreaminagain Posts: 1,130 Member
    You should probably not add me.
  • _JR_
    _JR_ Posts: 830 Member
    So you only want "enablers" to friend you? :noway:
  • onedayillbeamilf
    onedayillbeamilf Posts: 966 Member
    They are probably just trying to look out for you and are concerned about your health. I'm sure they aren't being negativismists on purpose.
  • FutureMASailor
    FutureMASailor Posts: 22 Member
    I wouldnt tell you to eat more because the way I look at it, we are in the same boat. I usually eat anywhere from 500 to 800 calories a day and i do agree, it is discourageing when your told to eat more.
  • I'm sorry, but I have to agree that people who are expressing concern about your low caloric intake care about your well-being. That is not enough calories to support your vital functions, and I feel sure there is no reputable doctor out there who would tell you it is OK. People who simply tell you what you want to hear when it endangers your health are not your friends at all.

    I know I struggle to reach the 1200 mark, but I add protein powder to plain Greek yogurt, or mix 1TBS Smuckers Natural Peanut Butter with 1TBS honey, 1Tsp Hershey's Natural Cocoa, 1tsp Gound Flax Seed, and 1/2 banana together for a sweet treat. It is good alone or spread on a whole wheat English muffin. Try to add these for some healthy protein and fat in your diet.

    I wish the best for you, and will add you to my prayers.
  • Jester522
    Jester522 Posts: 392
    Then dont talk to me. Because I do not support any diet below 1500. Male or female. My people eat.
This discussion has been closed.