Haven't been able to get back on track since dr. appointment

Hi all, I've found myself in a bit of a rut and I can't seem to claw my way back out of it.

To put this as nicely as possible, I went to a gynecologist last week because I was experiencing symptoms on par with endometriosis. I'd never been to this doctor before and looking back, I really wish I had done some more checking up on her. She spent less than five minutes with me - she didn't even perform my exam herself, but rather had an assistant do it.

Thanks to the oversized gown I was already wearing, she never really looked at me, either - just my weight on paper. I clocked in at 198 pounds that day. Rather than talk about my concerns with what my body was doing during its menstrual cycle (sorry if that squicks anyone out!) she only wanted to say that I needed to lose 50 pounds. She wanted me to lose the weight before diagnosing anything, because she felt that that was my problem. She refused to listen to the fact that I weighed almost 350 pounds as a teenager and never had this problem before. She treated me like I was a humungous whale and any medical problem I might be experiencing was because she felt I was 50 pounds overweight.

To top it all off, she ordered a blood test on me and the results came back with my insulin levels elevated, putting me at insulin resistance. She tried to prescribe me not only Metformin, but also Adipex and Topamax - an APPETITE SUPPRESSANT and an EPILEPSY DRUG, respectively. Topamax supposedly causes weight loss as a side effect to its epilepsy treatment. She thought I have such a problem with losing weight and eating food that she seriously tried to put me on drugs to crush my appetite and unnaturally make me lose weight. She also gave me diet sheets for a 1,000-calorie diet per day, something my nutrition professor stressed wasn't healthy AT ALL.

I know the lady is a quack and I have no intentions on going back to her, but it still has me so bummed out. I haven't been able to keep my diary since that day, and I'm having a hard time finding any motivation to do anything right now. I feel sick that she looked at me as little as she did and decided I have a problem with food and losing weight. It makes me feel like what I've done to get to this point over the past few years is for nothing. I'm just looking for a little support, I want to get back on track very badly. Thank you one and all. Blessings.

Replies

  • kit_katty
    kit_katty Posts: 992 Member
    Wow, what an awful person! I don't know how she could have done that to you! Unfortuantely you ended up seeing one of the bad doctors, who don't listen and don't seem to fully know what they're talking about. You need to forget about her, try and find another, better doctor and not let one idiot make you get off track. You can do this! And good on your for continuing to do this the healthy way! :flowerforyou:
  • jamie_maddox
    jamie_maddox Posts: 57 Member
    Take everything she said and throw it out the window. Find a new doctor that will take the time to sit down with you and understand YOUR body rather than her belief at what your body should be.
  • Laura_beau
    Laura_beau Posts: 1,029 Member
    Hello

    Sorry you've been treat like *kitten*. Doctors can be *kitten*, as a fellow endometriosis sufferer I have had my fair share of mis-diagnoses & fobbing off. The unfortunate thing is there is only a few doctors out there that truly understand the condition and that know how to treat it. My advice would be to research endometriosis doctors online and get a 2nd opinion with a specialist. I too am overweight (and used to weigh over 330lbs at one time) but was never treat like that, and am receiving treatment regardless of my size.

    Look how far you have come already from over 350!!!! Please do not give up, and CETRAINLY do not do her fad diets/ pills if you are not under supervision or do not want to do them.

    There is an emdometriosis group on here, feel free to join us :o)
  • StrongAtLast
    StrongAtLast Posts: 137 Member
    A doctor can really de-rail you, since we are "cultured" to look at them as an authority figure. However, the good thing about getting older, is that you learn, that you KNOW your body and you KNOW you are smart. You learned a lesson that you got a quack doctor. And I've been there. And it's VERY upsetting. You know she's a quack, so try to put it out of your mind. I've been flitting around dr's for a few years now, and FINALLY found one that will actually sit down and listen to my concerns. I've actually had my dr. tell me that I can't be having menstrual/pre-menopausal issues because I'm not old enough yet (Umm, I'm 45...???) So looked for a new one. Keep looking and now get back on track :-) Don't let her take that away from you. You are a confident woman! You can do this!
  • sarahharmintx
    sarahharmintx Posts: 868 Member
    Prove her wrong without the *kitten* load of drugs she tried to give you.
  • chooriyah
    chooriyah Posts: 469 Member
    That's horrible, I'm sorry. Doctors can be so brusque, dismissive and domineering sometimes. Would appear they do not teach empathy or communication skills - some doctors have them naturally, others simply do not. I can't understand why she would prescribe epilepsy medication - that's very bizarre.

    If it was me, I would probably write a letter to the hospital administrator or health center manager etc explaining your experience and registering your complaint against the doctor. It might not do anything, it's true, but it may make you feel better to be heard. Best case scenario, it might mean that she treats the next person with more consideration and care...
  • skinnybitchbarbie27
    skinnybitchbarbie27 Posts: 306 Member
    Let me tell you my fun story, so you can relate.

    I was 16. I walk into my gyno for extreme pain in my lower abdomen (on the right side all the time) and cramps that would literally put me on bed rest during my period. The woman walks in and says these exact words "the problem is you're fat". She goes in to saying that if I don't lose weight I am a high risk pregnancy**Note, I am 16 and not even pregnant* and "who would want to chance having a baby with someone who is high risk" She hadn't even done a pelvic on me or anything. So I go home bawling my eyes out and my mom just figures the doctor had the "you need to lose weight talk" and I took it personal. To prove me wrong, my mom made another appointment and went with me. When I told the doctor that my pain was an 8 all the time out of 10 and she replied "really? Well I had surgery from here (upper tummy) to here (lower tummy) and after I said my pain was only a 6." I have never seen my mom throw the biggest fit. my mom said "REALLY WHO ASKED YOU" and it lead on to where my mom was going to sue for malpractice concidering she wasn't even doing tests on me before diagnosing me. I was scheduled for an internal ultrasound the next morning. They found an insane mass of cysts on my right ovary and a few cysts on my left, signs for PCOS. The doc almost seemed pissed that I was right. She slammed her charts down, showed me the images, then said for the next step I need to schedule an appointment at the front for a lacroscopy. It wasn't until I got to the front where the office girl told me the doctor requested that I was no longer her patient and gave me a list of "specialists" who could assist me better.

    I went to a male physician and it was heaven. He didn't have a female body so he didn't have an opinion on what he thought was wrong. He was wonderful and EVERY SINGLE DOCTOR of mine since have been male. I know the idea is uncomfortable, however, they do not try to associate their expierence with yours, they only help you on a purely medical level.

    Don't let that b**ch doctor throw you off. See her face and hear her words when you're working out. Think that one day you'll see that biotch on the street and you'll be healthy and she'll be old and miserable, which it sounds like she already is. Don't let one bad apple throw you off your journey.

    Feel free to add me if you like. You can do this. I believe in you.
  • wizbeth1218
    wizbeth1218 Posts: 358 Member
    (((hugs)))

    I don't have anything more to add other than what has already been said. It really sucks that someone who is in a position that leads us to trust and respect them left you feeling so deflated. It's terribly frustrating when legitimate health concerns are ignored by doctors because s/he only sees the excess weight.

    I'm guessing that you encountered some terribly rude people when you were in high school. I was overweight in high school and I definitely remember the not-so-nice jerks who delighted in singling me out. Maybe you could go ahead and lump this doctor in with those other Negative Nellies from your past and leave them all there... in your past.

    You have already had SO much success! And your success FAR outweighs the opinions or comments of anyone, even a doctor, who doesn't see what you have already accomplished.

    You are better than those people say you are, and you deserve to stay on track. You can do it.
  • LosinItAll2012
    LosinItAll2012 Posts: 238 Member
    Let me tell you my fun story, so you can relate.

    I was 16. I walk into my gyno for extreme pain in my lower abdomen (on the right side all the time) and cramps that would literally put me on bed rest during my period. The woman walks in and says these exact words "the problem is you're fat". She goes in to saying that if I don't lose weight I am a high risk pregnancy**Note, I am 16 and not even pregnant* and "who would want to chance having a baby with someone who is high risk" She hadn't even done a pelvic on me or anything. So I go home bawling my eyes out and my mom just figures the doctor had the "you need to lose weight talk" and I took it personal. To prove me wrong, my mom made another appointment and went with me. When I told the doctor that my pain was an 8 all the time out of 10 and she replied "really? Well I had surgery from here (upper tummy) to here (lower tummy) and after I said my pain was only a 6." I have never seen my mom throw the biggest fit. my mom said "REALLY WHO ASKED YOU" and it lead on to where my mom was going to sue for malpractice concidering she wasn't even doing tests on me before diagnosing me. I was scheduled for an internal ultrasound the next morning. They found an insane mass of cysts on my right ovary and a few cysts on my left, signs for PCOS. The doc almost seemed pissed that I was right. She slammed her charts down, showed me the images, then said for the next step I need to schedule an appointment at the front for a lacroscopy. It wasn't until I got to the front where the office girl told me the doctor requested that I was no longer her patient and gave me a list of "specialists" who could assist me better.

    I went to a male physician and it was heaven. He didn't have a female body so he didn't have an opinion on what he thought was wrong. He was wonderful and EVERY SINGLE DOCTOR of mine since have been male. I know the idea is uncomfortable, however, they do not try to associate their expierence with yours, they only help you on a purely medical level.

    Don't let that b**ch doctor throw you off. See her face and hear her words when you're working out. Think that one day you'll see that biotch on the street and you'll be healthy and she'll be old and miserable, which it sounds like she already is. Don't let one bad apple throw you off your journey.

    Feel free to add me if you like. You can do this. I believe in you.


    I only have male doctors now as well... most female docs that I have had were like this!

    You know your body... Do what you feel is right!!!
  • EnchantedEvening
    EnchantedEvening Posts: 671 Member
    Oh man. That's too bad. :( Endometriosis can affect anyone, regardless of weight. I'm sorry you're going through that.

    As for the metformin, I would encourage you to take that. Have you read about insulin resistance? If a blood test confirmed it, which you said it did, that means your glucose will always be elevated because your insulin isn't bonding with it. I have the same issue, and I've been on metformin for almost two months. Taking metformin will help your body process the glucose into energy instead of fat. It will greatly improve your overall health, cravings, and energy, and it will reduce your risk for full-blown diabetes. Before I started taking it, I was hungry ALL the TIME, no matter when or how much I ate, and I had zero energy. I'd nod off all day. I would take your blood test results to a new doctor, have them confirm it, and have them talk to you about the diagnosis. Insulin resistance can affect anyone at any weight and can lead to weight gain because the glucose is just hanging around in the blood getting converted into fat. Metformin isn't a "fad" pill like the others. It really is meant to treat a condition you should pay attention to.

    You can skip the phentermine, though. Some doctors prescribe that to control your appetite until the metformin kicks in (which can take a few weeks), but it's definitely not required. It sounds like she sees it as more of a quick fix instead of trusting that you've lost weight just fine on your own. Definitely skip the Topamax.
  • slynnalex
    slynnalex Posts: 38 Member
    THe doctor was just plain wrong - PLEASE find a doctor that will listen to you. Don't give up. I have a friend who is overweight and had all kinds of symptoms, but no dr would listen. Finally she found one that would and did the proper tests and found that she had a very serious problem. They didn't listen because she was fat and assumed that all of her 'problems' came from that; they were very wrong and it nearly cost my friend her life. Maybe you could take a friend to your appointment - someone to advocate for you.
  • JEG2012
    JEG2012 Posts: 158
    I agree with all the comments prior to mine..... There are really good docs out there who do give a damn about what they doing and how the care for their patients.

    You are much stronger than you know and YOU can achieve your desired weight. Sure there will be rough patches along the way, we all have them. MFP is a strong bunch, we don't leave the stuggling behind, we reach back, grab their hand and tell them "C''mon, you can do this".....
  • sevencallmemom
    sevencallmemom Posts: 505 Member
    I have 2 kids on epilepsy meds...one has epilepsy and the other has seizures from brain damage. They get a different med (Keppra) and the side effects are so horrendous, I have begged the neuro to get them something else and he (and others) have told me that this med has the LEAST side effects. Mood swings like you would not believe. They are so emotionally fragile and fall apart crying at the tiniest little anything. I've even read it can make you suicidal.

    That said, it scares the crap out of me to think of you (or anyone else) being given seizure meds for weight loss.

    I hope you can find a new and much better dr soon!
  • Don't let the doctor throw you off your awesome track!

    I went through the same thing a few years back with a gyno. It was very awkward. And I said, "I'm sorry, I came in to make sure my lady parts were in working order not to get appetite suppressant drugs that make me feel like I'm on speed.. maybe you should check your appointment book".

    Some doctors don't ask what's wrong before deciding what needs to be done about it.

    You can do this! You can do anything!
  • NoMoreFlubbering
    NoMoreFlubbering Posts: 95 Member
    Please add me, and anyone else who can help support you. I don't know anything about the drugs, but I have lost 40 pounds on my own before, so at least I can help support you in that. I'm looking forward to losing my excess weight again, and would love to have supportive friends beside me!
  • saverys_gal
    saverys_gal Posts: 808 Member
    *hugs*

    Get a new GYN STAT missy!! It took me YEARS to get my endometriosis diagnosed. Yes, getting to a healthy weight does help some of the crazy TOM symptoms but when you have endometriosis losing weight does NOT help.

    Also, run as far away from those drugs as possible. Topamax (aka dopamax) can make you crazy. I took it for a while for my migraines.

    Most importantly, listen to your gut and seek a second opinion!! :flowerforyou:
  • drakechic08
    drakechic08 Posts: 156 Member
    I completely understand how you feel. I hav been dealing with undiagnosed back pain for 15 months and the first doctor I saw when I moved back home basically told me to seek psychiatric help instead of trying to figure out what is wrong and she drug tested me without my consent or knowledge. The next doctor only cared about my weight. I finally found one that is trying to help, but we believe I have endometriosis also so now I have to go to yet again another doctor. Dont let them bring you down. They get so focused on one thing they forget to treat us like people sometimes.
  • tawny7
    tawny7 Posts: 276 Member
    I'm sorry you had to go through that but don't let this one person negate everything you have accomplished!! I know it's hard to get back on track...I'm struggling with that right now, but you can do it!!! :flowerforyou:
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    **BREATHE**

    You know what she said and did was rubbish. Did it hurt? Absolutely. Did it change anything? No. You are still the same person you were before you saw her. You still have the same ability to do what you were doing before. Don't let her get to you, and if you can work out a way to see another doctor, do it. If you are having enough issues to be concerned, you need to see a doctor that will spend time with you and discuss them.
  • corrinnebrown
    corrinnebrown Posts: 345 Member
    Endometriosis can only be diagnosed through surgery. A lot of doctors can guess that you have it but until they go in and look they cannot be 100% sure. I have endometriosis and let me tell you it is not fun and neither is the surgery to diagnose/burn any off. My doctor went in laporscopically and said it was not just on my ovaries but all over my organs. He lasered off what he could but told me this will come back.

    I am so sorry that your OB was not great. I had the same issue with my old doctor. She was a woman and I thought great a woman OB. Wrong. The man I went to did a much better job.

    Are you on BC? If so that should help with some pain. Good luck girl!
  • samblanken
    samblanken Posts: 369 Member
    I too thought I had endometriosis. Always had pelvic pain and it NEVER went away. So my senior year of collge I go in for pelvic laprascopy to find out what is going on.

    I had bilateral groin hernias. And appendicitis. I didn't know what a hernia was. They took out my appendix on the spot but didn't do anything about the groin hernias. I had those fixed about a year later because it got to the point that I couldn't even stand up straight anymore.

    And as far as male vs. female OBs, I'd say that most of the females I've seen were *****y. I had a couple of male OBs that I hated - one that would literally just send me home and tell me to rest (when I needed emergency surgery which I had after I found a new OB - literally left new OB office and went to hospital for surgery). The one I see right now is amazing and did a wonderful job taking care of me through my miscarriage. Sound like your intution about this doc is spot on - fire her and find a new one.
  • bethvandenberg
    bethvandenberg Posts: 1,496 Member
    "I can't let that woman be right!". Would be my thought process. It's the worst when we let small minded with little background, set the tones for our lives. Prove that dr wrong and find a new one. I mean at the end of the day if she had told you that she thought you were dairy intolerant would you go eat ice cream? Screw her. Pull on your big girl panties. Realize mean people suck and thank god she's not your sister and get with what you set out to do. :-)
  • Hard, isn't it. I liken dieting to rock climbing. Food is an addiction, and we all know how hard it is to kick it. What is helping me is joining a year-long Diabetes prevention program from our local hospital. We check in weekly, weigh, turn in our food diaries, and attend a class. The accountability is what I need. Maybe this will work for you?
  • Siekobilly
    Siekobilly Posts: 401 Member
    That sucks. While I can't relate to the gynecologist visit, I can relate to the quack visit. As a teenager I got sent to a Psychologist where I was diagnosed with half a dozen disorders and put on more meds than I can remember. Unfortunately one of them was Topamax (for Bipolar). This medicine made me lose weight, yes. Rapidly, and in an unhealthy manner. Along with losing weight, however, I also now have tics in my right eye, and both hands.

    I call the doc a quack because all the crap they diagnosed me with wasn't what they thought. My "bipolar" was being a teenager coupled with the fact that my body produces more testosterone than most, and all the other crap (depression, ADHD, etc...) was all misdiagnosed (story for another time).

    Just stick with it, and use the quack as motivation to get back into it. She obviously thought you were some overweight couch potato. Keep up with your exercise and proper dieting, then when you get to your goal weight go to her office and show her what's up!
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
    What a quack! I'm glad you decided to find another Doctor! But by giving up you're only playing into her harsh judgmental assessment of you. Prove her wrong and get right back on track. Try to take something positive out of this experience - finding out early that your insulin levels are elevated allows you to be proactive with your health. Get right back into healthy eating and exercise and find a new Doctor asap to discuss your female problems :flowerforyou:
  • SarahAFerguson
    SarahAFerguson Posts: 250 Member
    I have had the same experience with male vs. female OB/GYNs. What is wrong with these people and where can we go to report this type of behaviour. I doubt you would get very far the the medical establishment, but someone should set up a website or something so you can check your Dr. out before engaging their services. There must already be something like that out there. Poor practitioners should be called out. More oftent than not the patient doesn't say anything directly because of fear that their qulaity of care would go down even more. You can't always see a different doctor either. In some locations health care is pretty limited and doctors are on short supply.
  • mrsgigandet
    mrsgigandet Posts: 53 Member
    Wow. Wow wow wow wow wow. I cannot believe how many people have come and said such amazing things! You all have completely lifted my spirits. Thank you SO much. I really shouldn’t let her get to me so, but it really does just deflate you. Especially coming from a person of authority like a doctor. I want so much to give each and every one of you a hug right now. I know I can’t thank you all without taking up the whole page, so please know that I thank and appreciate you all from the bottom of my heart. *HUGS*

    I’m trying hard to find a new doctor that is covered on my insurance and doesn’t have horribly offputting reviews online :-/ So far I found one, but sadly she isn’t accepting any new patients. I’ve been avoiding male doctors at all costs because the thought freaks me out, but you guys are really making me reconsider. The only other OBGYN I’ve ever been to was a witch as well, even if not to this extreme.

    To a few of you guys and gals who asked direct questions/made direct statements, I did want to respond :)

    Chooriyah- I absolutely will write a letter to the clinic. I’m not sure if it will do any good but at least I can try to make a difference in someone else’s life as you said. And it will let me vent more directly at the source :) I’ve already written reviews on a few places online, I was SHOCKED at how many other horrible ones were already out there about her.

    Fat*****barbie27- (Love your name, by the way!) That is so horrible, I’m so sorry you went through that. Just… wow. I cannot believe how some of these people become doctors and retain patients. Your words about a male doctor really have me thinking that I should give one a try. It’s just such an awkward feeling to get past, especially since I am self conscious around men as it is. Thanks for helping get me on that track, though, and I will most certainly add you :)

    Saltatoria- I am taking the Metformin. I’ve done a little reading about insulin resistance but it’s so overwhelming and a lot of it is conflicting information (thanks, Internet!). I’m still not sure how many carbs I should be eating per day for it. Type two diabetes runs in my mom’s family regardless of weight so it’s certainly not something I want to mess around with, but I’m really lost about how to start taking care of it. That’s another thing that’s had me kind of down, I think.

    Slynnalex- As kiddy as it might sound, I am definitely taking my mom with me to the next one :)

    Sevencallmemom- That is so scary. Bless you and your family, I’m so sorry your babies have to go through that. It scares me that a doctor would attempt prescribing seizure meds for weight loss, too.

    Corrinebrown- I’m not on birth control and I’m hoping to avoid it unless its medically necessary (not only for the money it will cost, but I just hate taking medicine unless I absolutely have to!) This pain only started about 8 months ago so I feel like it must mean SOMETHING. I really do think I’ll give a man OBGYN a shot. Thanks for the luck and good luck to you with yours, as well :)

    Samblanken- I’m so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I wish it wasn’t so hard to find a great doctor, but I’m glad you finally found one!

    Siekobilly- I LOVE the idea of going back to the office after I’m all toned and fit, haha :)

    Again, thank you one and all, and I'm sorry I can't reply to more of you individually (being at work doesn't help! ;)) You have all really given me a new motivation. I want to show her up and I want to be good to myself, too.