Dealing with a coworker who always offers food!

Options
1235»

Replies

  • PJmetts
    PJmetts Posts: 210 Member
    Options
    I am a numbers kinda person, so try this: No thanks, laugh and say "two" the next time repeat, say "Three" when she asks what the numbers are, say "thats the number of times you've asked me since you said you would stop asking". Keep a running tally, it can be fun, and funny, thus reducing your stress and making it a joke. She may not change, but you can change how you react and that may help make the situation easier and save a freindship. As others have said, this may be a cultural thing and she can't help herself for asking. We cannot change others, but we can change how we respond. Best wishes to you!:laugh: Laugh more!
  • spiregrain
    spiregrain Posts: 254 Member
    Options
    What is wrong with people?! Argh!
    nothing ) as long as they are not holding you by the neck and shoving their chewed food down your throat.

    Oh right... I forgot that physical violence is the ONLY sign that someone is behaving inappropriately or disrespectfully. My bad... lolz.
  • amydee714
    amydee714 Posts: 232 Member
    Options
    I am a numbers kinda person, so try this: No thanks, laugh and say "two" the next time repeat, say "Three" when she asks what the numbers are, say "thats the number of times you've asked me since you said you would stop asking". Keep a running tally, it can be fun, and funny, thus reducing your stress and making it a joke. She may not change, but you can change how you react and that may help make the situation easier and save a freindship. As others have said, this may be a cultural thing and she can't help herself for asking. We cannot change others, but we can change how we respond. Best wishes to you!:laugh: Laugh more!

    ^^this^^

    It calls attention to her behavior is a fun way. :)
  • Stenobun
    Stenobun Posts: 166 Member
    Options
    [/quote]
    don't unnecessarily piss off the people you have to work with. Then you just have to come to a hostile work environment every day.
    [/quote]

    So, what you're saying is, it's ok for someone to ignore your wishes to not be offered food, and continue to harass you about it day in and day out even though you told them to stop? Isn't that already a hostile work environment? When you dread going to work on a daily basis because someone just won't stop bothering you?

    Sometimes a "bad" attitude is the best attitude.[/quote]


    First, the elephant vs. ostrich thing was really funny.
    Second, here's the problem: if you react in a hostile way to someone offering you a cupcake, and that person then goes to HR, who do you think HR is going to have the problem with, the hostile person or the one offering the cupcake? The fact of the matter is that the rest of the world isn't going to be sensitive to what you're trying to accomplish. That's why we go to this site, for the support the rest of the world won't give us. You just have to learn to deal with these things without blowing your top. Of course, this is all in my opinion. I understand getting angry, I just feel like it doesn't help very much to be angry versus coping in a different way. This pastry person sounds like she just doesn't get it, and if we wasted our energy getting angry at people who don't get it, we'd spend A LOT of time angry.
  • desiv2
    desiv2 Posts: 651 Member
    Options
    I deal with this daily. I work at a bakery, and pretty much all my coworkers are always asking me to try something. Then our bosses even say, 'well you need to know what it tastes like if you're going to sell it.' I just say no, a lot of them realize it by now and often make the comment, "We should try this.. well we know Desiree wont, but we will." hahaha

    Trust me, I hate doing the organic trash, imagine opening tons of cakes, pies, brownies, donuts and throwing them into the trash. Let's just say, if you could gain weight by smelling food alone I'd be a lot bigger. O_O
  • sarahisme18
    sarahisme18 Posts: 574 Member
    Options
    I like the idea of just taking it, then immediately throwing it in the trash..... kinda mean, but if you've asked someone to respect your boundaries, and they don't, that's the consequence. Kinda reminds me of Parks & Rec episode, Ron Swanson throwing the veggie bacon in the trash.... "another, please!" LOL :)
  • Alpina483
    Alpina483 Posts: 246 Member
    Options
    nothing ) as long as they are not holding you by the neck and shoving their chewed food down your throat.
    Oh right... I forgot that physical violence is the ONLY sign that someone is behaving inappropriately or disrespectfully. My bad... lolz.

    who said it is and what does it have to do with anything )))
    my point was more in the lines of one can bring the horse to the well but one cannot make it drink... you know, separating things you can change from things you cannot. i mean only thing you really can control is yourself, and trying to control all these wrong people is counterproductive and probably won't make you happy.

    I say mind your own business and let others be, live and let live, but if you prefer focusing on making every displeasure people cause you painfully clear to them, by all means, knock yourself out.
  • kacollins1970
    kacollins1970 Posts: 45 Member
    Options
    nothing ) as long as they are not holding you by the neck and shoving their chewed food down your throat.
    Oh right... I forgot that physical violence is the ONLY sign that someone is behaving inappropriately or disrespectfully. My bad... lolz.

    who said it is and what does it have to do with anything )))
    my point was more in the lines of one can bring the horse to the well but one cannot make it drink... you know, separating things you can change from things you cannot. i mean only thing you really can control is yourself, and trying to control all these wrong people is counterproductive and probably won't make you happy.

    I say mind your own business and let others be, live and let live, but if you prefer focusing on making every displeasure people cause you painfully clear to them, by all means, knock yourself out.

    I get what you are saying to a point Alpina483, but I'm not trying to control this person and her actions and I don't want to make her unhappy. Like I said, I consider her a friend. However, why should I have to day in and day out (for last 2 years!) tell her "no thank you" or explain myself when she asks? Shouldn't she respect my wishes at some point? I'm not a mean person and I really don't like conflict, so today was especially difficult once I snapped at her. That's not me. But, I hit my boiling point. Also, the issue isn't completely re diet/willpower, I also just don't care to try other people's food.

    Anyway, I thank everyone for all their comments. Some really made me laugh!
  • Alpina483
    Alpina483 Posts: 246 Member
    Options
    I get what you are saying to a point Alpina483, but I'm not trying to control this person and her actions and I don't want to make her unhappy. Like I said, I consider her a friend. However, why should I have to day in and day out (for last 2 years!) tell her "no thank you" or explain myself when she asks? Shouldn't she respect my wishes at some point? I'm not a mean person and I really don't like conflict, so today was especially difficult once I snapped at her. That's not me. But, I hit my boiling point. Also, the issue isn't completely re diet/willpower, I also just don't care to try other people's food.

    Anyway, I thank everyone for all their comments. Some really made me laugh!

    no, no, I was not referring to your situation, OP, that was to spiregrain who was obviously talking about her own ))
    sorry about the digression.
  • UHKathy
    UHKathy Posts: 10 Member
    Options
    I have a similar sort of workplace situation. It's not uncommon for someone (prob 2-3 times a month) to bring in boxes of donuts and the counter is right next to my cubicle!!!!! NOt only that, two of my co-workers have buckets in their office with assorted mini chocolate candies. I am helpless and hopeless. I am a total chocolate and carb addict and once I take one bite, I'm sunk. Anyone have any suggestions? Believe me, I've tried to get another job. My sister says it's a "hostile work environment"!!! Seriously, anyone facing a similar situation? I know the solution is to NOT take that first bite....how do I do that? Yikes. I need to lose 30-40 pounds and, at this rate, I'll gain that.

Categories